-Previously in DiT-
Dinner was more intolerable.
"God!" I looked at the bathroom mirror and screamed in my towel which muffled my voice. "Why would werewolves kill Xavier? He was just a boy."
I trembled and reminded myself that the autopsy reports weren't out yet. It wasn't determined that it was actually him. But I couldn't stop crying. I looked at the tired image in the mirror and washed my face numerous times. I took a long breath and came out of the bathroom.
I was too tired to scream.
Victor was sitting on my bed.
***
"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Chapter-21
-Karen-
I didn't really need lights in the room to see him there. After my hair had turned green I could pretty much see through the dark. But that feeling was kind of otherworldly and catlike, so, I switched on the small table lamp.
"I'm glad you didn't shower me with curse words." Victor said with a smug smile on his face.
"Mmhm," I murmured and flopped into my bed. I didn't care if he was sitting next to me or I was dressed in my old T-shirt and shorts. I shut my burning eyes and silently wished for the sleep to engulf me.
He could watch me sleep, for all I cared. I didn't give a damn.
A minute passed and I dozed off.
"And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand," I heard Victor sing in a hushed voice.
I bolted upright on my bed like a bedbug had bitten me. I tried to shake the sleep out of my head. My eyelids felt so heavy that I had to painfully roll my eyes now and then.
"What the hell are you doing, Victor?" I asked. "I don't need a song from you to fall asleep. I'm already sleepy and I have a headache."
"I thought you'd feel nice if I sung you a song while you slept."
"It'll only make my headache worse."
"Is my voice that bad?" He asked.
"Why are you here?" I asked finally. "I know you don't sleep but please don't deprive me of it."
"Well, doesn't it matter to you if I stay here all night?"
"Buddy, right now I only care about my sleep. If I'll wake up in the middle of the night and still find you here, I promise I'll kick your butt out of my house." I made a face. Who in the world would want a guy to watch you sleep? "Right now, my mind is conquered by a sleep monster."
"You sound drunk." He chuckled.
I don't think he had learned anything from the slap earlier. He was irritating me again.
"I'm sure some long scientific explanation has the answer." I replied, yawning loudly. "Now get out and let me sleep."
"I want to talk."
Bewildered by the seriousness, I opened my eyes and looked at him.
"Is Nate alright?" I asked quickly. "Has he been acting strange again?"
He got up from the bed.
"What?" Victor's expressions suddenly changed into what I'd call a solid mixture of annoyance and hurt. Not that they really made a solid mixture but they did make a bad combination. "What do you think I am?"
"Uh-what do you mean, Victor?" I asked, and then bit the inside of my cheek. I didn't want to get to Victor's bad side. The fact is: nobody would want to.
"Do you think I'm your servant? You tell me to take care of Nathan every time I talk to you," He hissed at me. I saw the flash of his fangs. "What am I, his bodyguard?"
I don't know what made him react this way but something was going on between these two vampire brothers. And whatever was going on, it wasn't great. It was deadly.
"Why am I always supposed to take care of him? He is a vampire, he has powers and he is to be crowned as the king of all vampires. Why the hell am I supposed to act as his assistant?" Victor walked away and stopped to stare out of the open window. His face shone in the moonlight, defining every edge of it. I couldn't help, but lose my sleep to stare at him. "Would I ever find peace?"
That's when I snapped out of my daze.
"Victor, what did you say?" I asked. Even though I had heard him, I wanted to be sure of what I had just heard. "Why are you-?"
He turned back to looked at me. I saw his empty eyes which held no emotions. His mouth that was open to show the sharp canines I used to fear. A bit of fear in my head was still there but I knew he wouldn't hurt me.
"How well do you know me, Karen?" He asked. "Do you even trust me?"
"I know you enough to trust you." I got up from the bed and walked up to him. "I'm sorry if I triggered those harsh feelings which you have for Nate. I didn't mean to."
"Why is it, that you don't see me?" He completely ignored what I had said. "Is this because you think I am a bad guy?"
Questions and replies stirred up in my mind. I was tired and lost. I didn't know where to start from and where to end this conversation. I didn't want to hurt Victor's feelings and neither did I want him to feel this way. He looked so distant.
"I wasn't born as a vampire." He said silently but loud enough for me to hear him. "I was a human before adapting to vampirism."
"You mean, you were-"
"I was just a human guy who was counting his last days on his bed in late 17th century. I was suffering from Tuberculosis. It was known popularly as the White Plague at that time. Some older people called it Consumption mainly because the infection seemed to consume the sufferer." Victor continued. "I was being consumed, Karen. There was nothing that could save me, nothing but a miracle. Who would ever want to die? I was young. I had only crossed 21. I wanted to live, fall in love and travel the world."
"As the death descended on me, I only wished for life. You only know what life means to you when you are at the verge of losing it. My limited days were ending and that's when the werewolves attacked our village." He looked at the moon. "In no time, vampires were there too, to fight them. Vampires followed the werewolves, searching every home in the village. That's when Lord Valentino found me in my room. I knew what he was but I wasn't scared. Why would I be, when I was already dying? He was a kind vampire. No matter how dangerous and ruthless he was, he always kept the essence of human soul within himself. He sat next to me, with pain in his eyes. He talked to me about the feeling before death. That's when I let him know my wish. Are you listening, Karen?"
"Of course I am," My gaze never left him. How fragile he looked at the moment.
"He denied. He kept telling me how dangerous it was to turn into a vampire. He told me how some new vampires went insane with bloodlust. Their insanity lasted as long as they were staked to death. You know, even vampires go rogue." A thin smile appeared on his lips. "I begged for him to give me life. I was ready to sell my soul to the devil to be alive at that moment."
"Victor," I took his hand in mine and felt him flinch. His hand was as cold as ice.
"He bit me at last and took me with him to the mansion where Lady Adeline accepted me as her son. The transformation into a vampire is a painful process. You won't believe me if I told you that at the moment of transformation I suddenly wished I shouldn't have gotten into all this," I let out of laugh when he said that. "But after the transformation, I wasn't myself anymore. I was completely changed into a monster."
"You're not a monster," I said, shaking my head.
He tore his eyes away from the moon and looked at me.
"You don't know me. You don't know how many people I've killed, how many families I've destroyed and remember when you asked if I knew what love was?" He touched my cheek, caressing the cheekbone softly with his thumb. "I did not. Maybe I still don't. My past haunts me, stops me from getting close to anyone. I've felt the hollowness where my heart was supposed to be. The memories are my worst nightmare and I don't need to sleep to see them."
"You shouldn't dwell on the past. You can't change the past but you can change yourself. You can change the person you used to be and if you have changed, then I don't think you should regret what you did in the past." I said. "You didn't have control on your nature. Vampires are bloodsuckers, they can't survive on vegetables."
Victor's face lightened up and he laughed softly. He dropped his hand from my cheek. The coldness of his hand had made my cheek go numb. I felt the warmth spreading back again.
"There were times when I killed a person after drinking his blood. I left corpses wherever I went." He gulped. "Lord Valentino was a good father. He tried to convince me to leave my cruel behavior behind but my powers were at the peak and I'd become a stubborn child for the love mother and he had shown to me. So, he punished me. He kept me in the basement of the mansion for many weeks without any blood. I kept screaming, calling mother's name because I knew father was as stubborn as me. Those weeks reminded me of my human days of the suffering."
"How did you get out of there?" I asked.
"At last, when I could no longer scream, Lord Valentino came to see me. I was so weak that I couldn't even talk properly. He asked for my forgiveness, for treating me like that." He paused. "And then he said 'Son, being a vampire doesn't mean you have to be a killer. I know we can't survive without blood but you don't have to murder a human to feed on him. We are vampires but we still have a beating heart. And that heart is beating only because of the human who gave his blood to you. You should be obliged to him for keeping you alive even in your death.' Those words hit me hard."
"So, Valentino was a good father."
"He was an amazing father, Karen." There was unmasked sadness in his voice.
"What happened to him exactly?" I asked. I had never heard anything about Valentino from Nate or him when I was in the mansion. "You never mentioned him before when we were in the other dimension."
"The day when Nathan was sent into the sleep, I was called to father's room to have the 'talk'." He made air quotes. "When I reached there, I only saw his body lying on the bed with a stake through his heart. His eyes and mouth were wide open. There was nothing I could do to save him."
"Someone killed him?" I couldn't believe it. "Wasn't he a very powerful vampire? How could he not defend himself?"
"Element of surprise is a nasty thing. I'm sure he was expecting me there, when someone staked his heart. It was a stake made using cedarwood." Victor looked down on his feet. "The rumors spread like a wildfire that I had killed my father and imprisoned my brother so that I could take the throne."
"Why didn't you tell them the truth?"
"Who would've believed me?" He asked, looking up at me. "I was always the infamous brother."
"But you were the one who bled Nate to near death. That's why he had to be sent to sleep." I said remembering the story Nate had told me.
"It wasn't really me."
"Then who was it?"
"The less you know, the more you'll be safe." He replied turning his back to me. He held his head between his hands. "I've bared my soul to you, Karen but there are things that I can't tell you."
I placed my hand on his shoulder and tried to turn him around. I thought he wouldn't move but he did. He turned to look at me again. I was surprised when I saw his eyes were filled with tears.
"I didn't know vampires could cry." I gasped.
"I wish they couldn't." He muttered. "It makes me feel human. Vulnerable and frail."
"You underestimate humans a lot. Crying doesn't make anyone weak," I protested. Then a question struck. "Can you at least tell me, why did you kill Kaitlin?"
Victor didn't say anything for a while.
"I didn't kill her."
"You killed her." Although I tried to sound soft, it clearly came out as an accusation. "Stop lying, Victor."
"No," He shook his head slowly. "I didn't kill Kaitlin. I didn't kill her. She's alive."
Silence enveloped us. I just stood there, staring into his eyes.
A/N I'm sad. I feel sad when I read this chapter. :(
BTW, how was the chapter?
Please comment and vote. And give me feedback.
Now you have read chapter 21 (we've come a long way)...which book would you vote for:
DiR or Dit?
And yeah, the song which Vic was singing is 'Iris' by Goo Goo Dolls. Damn! That song is so heart touching.
-M_m
P.S. Please check out my 'One Line Wattpad Rants' book. Take care.