Adrien
The others packed their things in the dark, and they were back on the road heading home. He and Marinette were in the back, and Nino drove while Alya rode shotgun. He hadn't said a word to her since they got back to shore, too angry to even try. They hadn't said anything about what happened, and Alya seemed to be dying for details.
"That must have been so scary."
"Yeah..."
Marinette mumbled, picking at the frayed sleeve of her hoodie.
"I'm so proud of you two."
Alya said, and that was it. That was the last straw for Adrien. How could she even say that?
"Are you fucking serious?"
All eyes seemed to turn to him, even Nino shot him a glance.
"What?"
Alya sounded confused, and he wanted to reel in his anger, because she didn't know what had happened out there. But he couldn't.
"You should be pissed. Not proud. What she did was fucking reckless and she could have died because of it."
"Adrien!"
Alya hissed, and he turned his attention to Marinette.
"Are you proud of yourself?"
"He was just a kid. His parents were probably scared to death."
Marinette whispered, and he shook his head.
"What about your parents? You're barely an adult yourself. When someone is drowning like that, you call for help. You do not jump in after them."
"He would have died before they got there."
She snapped, and he looked away from her, in a weak attempt to calm down.
"Adrien, she saved that kid's life."
Alya said it gently, as if speaking to a frightened animal and he glared daggers at her back.
"No. She didn't. Do you really want to know how her rescue attempt went down? That guy was panicking. And sometimes, people will go into kill or be killed mode. So when she got to him, he tried to drown her. People in that state of mind will not listen to reason or logic. They will do whatever the hell they can to survive. And if that includes using another human being as a flotation device so be it."
"It wasn't his fault."
Marinette snapped, and he turned to her, his voice suddenly calm.
"No. It wasn't his fault. It was yours. If you hadn't have jumped in, none of that would have happened. Maybe he would have died. Maybe not. But one thing I know for certain. If I hadn't have gone in after you, they would have been collecting corpses."
Alya seemed horrified, and she had turned around in her seat to look at Marinette.
"Is that true? Was he trying to drown you?"
Marinette looked out the window, and Adrien clenched his jaw. Did she not understand how much worse that could have been?
"He had her underwater, trying to get on top of her. When I finally managed to get him away from her, she was exhausted. Every wave pulled her under. Just before the boat got there, she went under. And she couldn't come back up. It wasn't brave. She almost died."
Alya had tears in her eyes, and she reached around the seat, squeezing Marinette's hand. Marinette didn't even respond, and his temper flared again.
"Imagine how your parents would have felt seeing you jump off that cliff. Imagine how I felt, trying to keep you from going under, when you completely refused my help."
"You would have let him drown!"
She shouted, and when she turned, the tears in her eyes put his anger on the back burner.
"Yeah. I would have. I stand by that decision. We wouldn't have lasted much longer out there Marinette. If it came down to you or him, it would be you. Everytime. And I don't care if you'd hate me for it. At least you'd be alive to hate me."
She shook her head, and he looked out of his window. A long time ago, he had admired how selfless she was. Now? He hated it.
* * * * *
Everyone seemed pissed at him. When he dropped Marinette off, she didn't say anything to anyone, just grabbed her bag and slammed her door. He didn't care how pissed she was. She almost died. He had a right to be angry, and he didn't understand why no one else was. Alya and Nino would whisper, as if anything louder than that would set him off. He helped unload the car, and Alya gave him a look he couldn't quite read when they had finished. He just got in his car and went home. Was he overreacting? He didn't care if he was, but it didn't make sense that he was the only one angry. He stormed past the bodyguard who awaited his arrival, not even looking at him. He needed a shower. He needed the smell of the ocean off of him, because it was only serving to piss him off more.
"You okay?"
"Let's not talk about this Plagg. Obviously, I'm fucking fine."
He stripped, getting in the shower. Why was he so angry? Yeah, it was a close call. She was just trying to save someone. She was alive. She was fine. So why was he still so angry? Wouldn't a normal person just be relieved? He finished in the shower, stepping out. Plagg was watching him curiously, and he snapped his head in his direction.
"What?"
"Nothing. Just so you know, I would have been angry too."
He said quietly, and Adrien sighed, grabbing clothes. He was almost completely dressed, when his phone rang. He tugged on his shirt, picking up Chat's phone. He swallowed hard, as if it would smother his anger. He took a deep breath before answering.
"Hey Mari."
She didn't respond at first, but he could hear her sobbing. If that swallow didn't drown his anger, this definitely did.
"Princess?"
He felt cold, hearing her cry like that. Plagg ate a slice of cheese in one bite, flying over to Adrien's shoulder, waiting on the inevitable. Her voice cracked when she tried to speak, and he shook his head.
"Hang on princess, I'm coming. Plagg, claws out!"
He made his way to Marinette's in record time, all while listening to her cry on the phone. He felt so guilty, but he couldn't change it. He landed on her rooftop, and the skylight was already open. She was sitting in her desk chair, doubled over with her forehead on the edge of the desk, dryheaving over a bucket. He made his way over to her, resting his hand on her back.
"What happened?"
He already knew, but he needed her to talk about it. He needed to know if she was crying because of what happened, or because he had snapped at her. He knelt down next to her, pushing her bangs out of her eyes. She looked at him, and he felt a sharp pain in his gut. If he had just been watching her on that cliff, if he had caught her, none of this would have happened.
"I screwed up."
She sobbed, wrapping her arms around his neck. He felt relieved, at least she understood how bad it could have been. If he had seen this side of her in the car, instead of indifference, he wouldn't have been so hard on her. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, and she buried her face into his neck.
"Talk to me."
She sobbed harder, and he closed his eyes. He had never seen her cry this hard. Not even that night he heard her on patrol. This was so, so much worse. He stayed there with her, rubbing her back, until her sobs had subsided. She finally let go, wiping her face with her sleeve. Her eyes were puffy, and her skin was blotchy.
"I almost drowned."
He kissed her forehead, her skin was so hot it almost burned.
"Come on. You can take a shower and tell me about it."
He said gently, just wanting to get her clean and in bed. He was exhausted, and they both had school tomorrow. She followed him out of her room, and they crept into the bathroom. He closed the door and turned on the light, and she started to strip as he turned on the water. He didn't look back in her direction until she was hidden by the shower curtain, wanting to keep his focus in check. He sat down on top of the counter, listening to the water running.
"I tried to save this guy from drowning. He was scared, so he clung to me, and I went under. Alot."
He closed his eyes, trying not to get annoyed about how many details she skipped over. Like the cliff. She sighed, and he opened his eyes again, watching the curtain.
"I couldn't save him and... my friend had to save both of us. He was so mad at me."
Her voice wavered, and he flinched. So he was partly to blame for her crying like this.
"He said I was reckless."
She whispered, and he leaned his head back, looking at the ceiling. His goal hadn't been to hurt her feelings. He had just wanted her to understand how dangerous it was.
"He was right. I rushed in without thinking. I would have died without him. I just thought I could save him. I guess I just wasn't strong enough."
"Marinette, it's not about being strong. When something like that happens, its hard to keep control of the situation when the victim is panicking."
She only sighed, and he stood up, staring at the shower curtain. He wanted to hold her. He wanted to tell her how sorry he was. How scared he had been. But he couldn't. Because Chat hadn't been there.
"Can I join you?"
He asked softly, and she poked her head out of the curtain.
"What about your suit?"
"I trust you. Do you trust me?"
She nodded slowly, before disappearing back behind the curtain.
"Promise you won't peek?"
"I promise kitty."
She whispered, and he closed his eyes.
"Plagg, claws in."
His kwami gave him a dirty look, before flying off through the wall. Adrien's hands shook as he took off his clothes, his heart pounding. Was this really such a good idea?
"Stay still. I'm going to turn off the light."
She didn't answer, and he wondered if she was worried about finding out who he was. Would she be disappointed? Angry? He ignored the thought, flipping the lightswitch. It was completely dark, she wouldn't be able to see him anyway. He blindly felt his way to the shower curtain, pulling it aside and stepping in. He reached out, his hand grazing across her skin. He couldn't tell which part of her he was touching, but he didn't care. He just wanted her close. She stepped forward, and his heart skipped a beat when he felt her hands. They were against his chest, circling around to his back. She hugged him, and she felt so warm. He wrapped his arms around her waist, the thought of letting his hands explore making him sigh. He needed to focus on her. He wanted to apologize so badly. He wanted to tell her how scared he was, and how much he hated that feeling. He wanted to explain everything, why he was so angry, why he was so relieved. But he couldn't. Chat was the one allowed to hold her, and kiss her. Not Adrien. He needed to remember that.
"You're not invincible Mari. Please don't do something like that again."
He whispered, and his voice held no anger. That suprised him. Because he knew deep down he was still angry. She let go of him, her hands moving to cup his face. She brought him down to her, kissing him softly. The kiss wasn't nearly long enough, and when she pulled away he fought not to pull her back.
"I'm sorry Kitty."
He sighed, kissing the top of her head.
"What else did you need to do?"
"Wash my hair."
He felt her move away, and the distance made his body ache. She wasn't that far, but it felt like she was an entire ocean away. A flash of her face, of the fear written on it in the ocean made his head spin, and he reached out, his hand brushing her back. She was still here. She was fine.
"I'm glad you're alive princess."
She was silent, and that felt wrong. Why wasn't she agreeing? Why wasn't she saying anything?
"Mari?"
"Will you wash my hair for me?"
He frowned, she had completely brushed off his comment.
"Sure."
She pushed the bottle into his hand, and he put the day's events on hold. He poured all of his energy into massaging the strawberry scented shampoo into her hair, making sure it was completely lathered. This felt different. He had never washed someone's hair before. Was it supposed to feel this intimate? Or was it something else? When he finished she stepped away to rinse, and he followed her, rinising his hands off. This time, he let his hands explore. Not sexually, but curiously. Her skin was soft and slick with water, and he was trailing his hands over her waist, up her back, and across her arms. She felt amazing. He wanted to know everything, every inch of her body. She tensed and pulled away when his hands touched a certain area on her side, like she was ticklish and he filed that away for later. He kept track of her sighs, and any sounds she made. He felt her arms drop, she had finished rinsing her hair.
"Thanks kitty."
He smiled, but that wasn't the name he wanted to hear. He wanted her to say his name. His real one.
"Chatton?"
She whispered, and he smiled. He could settle for Chatton, as long as she was the one saying it.
"I'm still here princess."
She leaned her body into his, and he tried not to focus on how her breasts pressed into his chest, nor how he felt her sex rub against his. But he couldn't just ignore it. Not when he could feel his blood rushing to his cock. She started kissing along his chest, and he closed his eyes.
"Marinette... I don't know if that's such a good idea."
He whispered, his voice already hoarse. She stopped, pressing her forehead against his chest.
"Okay."
Her tone told him she was annoyed, and he frowned.
"It's not that I don't want to. I just don't think a near death experience is a good reason to sleep with someone."
She scoffed, stepping away completely.
"You think I want to have sex because I almost died?"
Warning bells started ringing in his head, that definitely sounded like a trap. So instead of giving the wrong answer, he gave none at all. He heard her cut the water off, and she pulled the curtain aside.
"Mari don't leave."
"It's fine kitty. If you don't think it's a good idea, then we can wait."
Her tone was more gentle, but she still sounded upset. He wanted nothing more than to do it. He just didn't want it to be because of that.
"When I was... when I kept going under the waves, it was only a few seconds each time."
It had felt like centuries to him.
"But it gave me alot of time to think. You'd be amazed at how many thoughts can go through a person's mind in just a couple of seconds."
"What did you think about?"
He asked, reaching out. His hand touched her towel, and he pulled it from her, laying it on the floor. He sat down and gently pulled her down with him.
"I thought about dying. How permanent it is."
He flinched, but thankfully it was hidden in the cover of darkness.
"I felt so guilty at first. All my life, I've done everything in my power to help others. It felt like I hadn't done a damn thing for myself. And then I thought about you. One of the main things I've allowed myself to be selfish with. And it was one of the only things I didnt feel guilty about."
So she had realized how destructive being selfless could be. He smiled softly, his heart swelling almost painfully.
"I'm flattered princess."
"It felt like you were the one thing I had completely given to myself. Maybe that's why I thought..."
She trailed off, and he placed his hand over hers. He wanted her to continue. He wanted to know everything going on in that pretty little head of hers.
"I've been in love with the same guy, since I was fourteen. I wanted to save myself for that. I know it sounds dumb, but I thought, if I gave that to you, it would feel more permanent. I wouldn't be waiting for him anymore, I'd be moving on."
That wasn't dumb at all. He had done the exact same thing for Ladybug. And he was starting to realize just how taxing waiting had been. He had waited so long, to give her something she didn't even want.
"So there you were, on the brink of death, and you were thinking damn. Should've slept with him."
She giggled and he could almost picture her face from the sound alone.
"More like in the movies. You know, the whole, I don't want to die a virgin thing?"
He chuckled, trying not to be too loud now that the water was off, and her parents were just down the hall.
"In all seriousness kitty. I'd rather it be you, than anyone else."
He smiled, an odd sense of satisfaction coming over him. If he had to chose someone other than Ladybug, he would've picked her. He had always admired her. Not to mention she was just as beautiful on the inside, as she was on the outside.
"Me too princess."
He whispered, and she stood.
"I'm going back to my room, so you can get dressed and transform back."
"Wait."
He stood up, his heart racing. He wasn't ready to be Chat just yet.
"What?"
"One more kiss. Without my mask."
He felt embarrassed saying it, but she seemed to understand. She traced her hands up his arms, until they came to rest on his cheeks. She pulled him down a little, brushing her lips against his. He sighed, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her as close as he could. Her kisses always made him feverish, and he regretted telling her they should wait. She pulled away, planting a small kiss on the tip of his nose.
"Since we aren't having sex, I guess we can go over ground rules."
"Ground rules?"
He repeated, and heard her hum in response.
"I'll wait for you in my room."
"If you see Plagg, my kwami, tell him to get his ass back here."
He mumbled, squinting as she opened the door and slipped through, closing it behind her. He listened to her footsteps fade before turning on the light. What the hell did she mean by ground rules?