Chapter 14

I walked away from Mr. Jacobs not knowing what to say.  I knew he really loved Kade he just had a funny way of showing it.  Nora was standing in the dining room when I walked in.

"Addi! Are you ok?" Concern filled her face as she took in my appearance.  I turned and look in the mirror on the wall.  My hair was all over the place,  my face was stained with mascara, my eyes were red and puffy.  I looked like I'd been up for hours crying.  I turned back to Nora and nodded.

"I'm ok I just need to see Kade where is he?"

"Upstairs I think.  Addi you should sit down you look pale.  Are you sure you are ok?  Grant didn't hurt you?"

"No just scared me.  I'm ok really Nora.  Finish up everything and head home I need you here by noon tomorrow ok?"  She nodded.

"If you need anything before then or if you decide you can't do everything just let me know ok? I can handle anything you need me to."  I smiled at her.  She really was a great assistant.

"Ok, Nora. I'll see you tomorrow."  I turned around and made my way upstairs.  I'd never been upstairs so I really had no idea where I was going.  But when I got to the top of the stairs on the second floor I heard Kade yelling.  I followed his voice that seemed to get louder and louder.

"Damn it!!!!!!!" He growled and something crashed to the floor.  I heard what I assumed was glass breaking.  I could hear Emma but couldn't tell what she was saying.  I listened to a few doors before I found the right one.

"Kade just take a breath! Calm down you are destroying your room!! Listen to me damn it!! You never would listen to anyone when you got like this but mom!! KADE!"  Emma argued with him but clearly, he wasn't listening.  I heard him scream again and something else broke.  I don't think I could have prepared myself for what I saw when I opened the door.  Emma just stood there unsure of what to say to explain her brother's actions.  The floor was covered in glass and little pieces of wood.  The walls had holes in them from Kade punching them I assumed.  A wooden desk was laid broken on the floor.  Kade was standing there panting with blood on his hands and face.  His jacket was gone and his dress shirt was ripped up with bloodstains on it.  His hair was tinted with blood and his eyes were bloodshot.  When his eyes met mine he took a deep breath and he sunk on the floor.  He held his head in his hands and began to rock back and forth crying.  I looked over to Emma and she nodded.  As I entered the room I had to tiptoe to keep from stepping on glass.  Emma made her way out of the room.  "I'll be in my room if you need me." She whispered and shut the door behind her.

I stood in front of Kade.  "Kade..." I whispered.  He was sobbing so loud I didn't know if he heard me.  I crouched down in front of him touching his arm.  "Kade..."  This time he lifted his head and looked at me.  He looked so scared.

"I'm so sorry Addi."  He looked at me with tears falling down his face.  I put my hands on his face.

"It wasn't your fault Kade and I'm fine.  Everything is ok baby."

"No, it's not ok Addison.  Look at me! Look what I've done! I can't control myself... I ... I could have killed him."

"But you didn't Kade he'll be fine."

He shook his head taking my hands off his face.  "You should go Addi.  You deserve better than this I'm a monster."

"No, you are not! You saved me, Kade! If you wouldn't have stopped him he would have raped me!!!"  I stood up yelling at him.

"Addi just listen to me!!! I'll end up hurting you.  I'm no good, don't you see that! Look around!  I destroy everything I touch!"  He screamed.

"I don't care!!!! Do you hear me?? I don't give a fuck if you destroy me!  I love you and I want you no matter what happens!!!" I screamed.

He looked at me bewildered. "Addi...." He sighed and stood up. "I can't do this Addison."

"What the fuck does that mean?!" I screamed.

"Calm down Addi. Look how upset I've made you. I love you and so I can't do this to you. You deserve better than me. I want what's best for you and as much as it hurts me to say it. That's not me Addi. Just go please go before I change my mind."

"NO!!! I'm not going anywhere!! You're just upset, Kade! You are perfect for me no one in the world could make me feel the way you do!! Please Kade don't do this!!!" I screamed and the tears began to fall. Emma opened the door and was standing behind me.

"Addi. Come with me ok? Dad wants to talk to Kade." Emma said softly.

I shook my head. "Kade please." I cried.

"Go with her Addi," Kade said not looking at me.

I ran over to him wrapping my arms around his neck. I realized how desperate I looked but I didn't care. "Please..." I held on to him crying.

He gently put my arms down and walked away from me. "Em watch her, would you? I'll call Darby to come to get her." And then he was gone.

"Addi, come with me I'll fix you a drink and we'll talk," Emma said softly.

I stood there crying for a few more minutes and then I followed Emma out of the room. She leads me to what I assumed was her room because her wedding dress was hanging in the middle of the room.

"Sit down Addi."  She pointed to one of the chairs in the sitting area of her room.  She went to her closet and came back with a bottle of vodka.  She poured a glass and handed it to me.  "You need this.  It will calm your nerves."  She poured a glass for herself and downed it.  I sat there looking at her beautiful wedding dress.

"Em, I'm so sorry about all of this.  We are ruining everything this weekend was supposed to be all about you."  I downed the vodka and started coughing because it burned going down.

"None of this was your fault.  Besides no one knows about this but us for the most part.  Tomorrow is what matters anyway.  You should go home and rest Addi.  Let Kade calm down and talk to him tomorrow.  He is just scared.  He hates when he does stuff like this.  He'll get over it."

The tears started falling again.  I couldn't stop them no matter how much I tried.  "He doesn't want me Em.  He said I deserve better than him.  I don't want anyone else." I wiped my eyes and sniffed.

"I heard everything Addi.  He is just scared.  He's never looked at anyone like he looks at you not even Jules.  That's why this has him so scared.  He loves you more than anything and he doesn't want to hurt you.  Give him some time.  Over the years he's thrown a few of these fits.  Always ends the same with him crying regretting everything he did.  It's been years since this as happened.  Truth be told he may have killed Grant if you wouldn't have stopped him."

"But I didn't do much to stop him.  I touched him and he stopped his self."

"Yeah because of you.  When he was young he would throw a fit and break shit.  Mom could just say his name and he would calm down.  After she died he threw a fit similar to this breaking shit and screaming, me or dad neither one could stop him.  Eventually, he got tired and stopped on his own.  Tonight he stopped his self twice because of you Addison and I think that scares him too.  That you have that kind of power over him because he loves you so much."

"I don't want to lose him Em.  I've never felt this way about anyone in my whole life.  The only person I've ever truly loved other than Kade is my mom.  I thought I had loved Grant but it was nothing compared to what I feel for Kade."

"I understand I love Ryan more than anything in this world and that's why I need to get to bed and you need to go home and rest.  Kade will come around Addi and if he doesn't I'll kick his ass myself.  Come on I'll walk you down." I nodded.  I followed her downstairs wiping my eyes.  Darby was standing in the foyer waiting for me.

"I'll see you tomorrow Addi try to get some rest." Emma hugged me.  "I'll check on him ok?"

"Ok.  Thanks, Em, and I am really sorry about all of this."

"I know but it's not your fault.  Goodnight Addi.  Darby, take care of her and make her rest."

"I will," Darby called out as she escorted me out of the house.

Darby drove us home as I cried quietly resting my head against the window. Once we were in the apartment I laid down on the couch crying into a pillow. "Ok Addi what's going on? Kade told me about Grant and how he stopped him but that's about it. He didn't tell me anything else just that I needed to come to get you. What's wrong? Did Grant hurt you Addi?"

"No Kade stopped him before he did."

"Ok good then what's going on? I'm sure Grant scared you but you look like someone killed your best friend Addi. And since I'm standing right here I know that's not true." I laughed wiping my eyes.

"It's Kade he pretty much broke up with me. Said he couldn't do this. He'd just hurt me and I deserved better."

"What? That doesn't make any sense Addi. Kade is in love with you why would he break up with you?!"

So I told her everything. She sat there for a few minutes in shock just looking at me before she spoke.

"I think Emma's right he'll come around. He got out of hand and it scared the shit out of him. I get it. Honestly, Grant deserved the ass whooping but Kade did take it too far. You need to rest Addi. Your gonna have a long day tomorrow so go to bed and try to sleep. If you need me I'm here I'll even go with you tomorrow if you want. Maybe I can talk some sense into Kade." She smiled.

"Thanks, Dar. I'm gonna take a shower and go to bed. I'll see you in the morning."

After my shower, I put on my pajamas and climbed into bed. I laid there for a long time looking at the ceiling. This night started as the best night of my life and ended as one of the worst. He loved me I knew he did but I wondered if love would be enough. I tossed and turned. I slept for a few hours and then I woke up around three a.m.

I checked my phone just in case but I didn't have any messages or missed calls. I decided to text Kade and see if he'd reply.

I love you

Somewhere between four a.m. and five I woke up and checked my phone. Kade hadn't replied which just upset me all over again and I cried myself back to sleep. My alarm went off at nine and I climbed out of bed. I looked in my bathroom mirror. My eyes were swollen from all the crying. I looked like shit. I brushed my teeth and went to get coffee.

Darby was sitting in the kitchen eating cereal. "Did you sleep at all?" She asked as I poured my coffee.

I shrugged. "I got a few hours. I texted him about three but he didn't answer." I sighed.

"Just get the wedding over with today and see what happens. Who knows you may get there and Kade will start begging at your feet for forgiveness." She smiled.

"I really doubt that Dar. But thanks for trying to cheer me up." I made myself a bowl of cereal and sat down.

"I was serious about coming with you today I don't think you should be there alone. What time are we leaving?" She asked.

"The crew is arriving at noon so I'll be there by eleven-thirty to get everything sorted out. The wedding is at six. It's a long afternoon Dar. You don't have to come."

"No I don't but I am. Your exhausted Addi you need extra help and if anything crazy happens I'll be there with you."

I smiled at her as I finished my cereal. "Thank you, Dar. You're the best friend a girl could ask for."

"You damn right I am." She grinned.

"I'm going to get ready. We leave at eleven fifteen and bring a cocktail dress with heels for the wedding."

I curled my hair and put on my makeup. I dressed in a white tank top and black shorts. I packed a bag with all of the essentials I would need to change. "Dar are you ready?" I called as I gathered my purse and my wedding book with all of the info I needed for the day.

"Yeah." She came out carrying a dress bag and a large tote. "I've got extra hair spray if we need it and I picked you out a dress that is sure to have Kade drooling."

"I already have a dress, Dar."

"Yeah yeah but this dress is better trust me!" She grinned.

"Ok. Let's go I don't have the energy to argue with you."

By two o'clock the estate was full of workers. The caterer Emma originally hired had shown up and was prepping for dinner. The DJ was setting up the sound system. The florist was arranging flowers everywhere. Everything was starting to come together. I had to admit this was one of the best weddings I had done. I was proud of myself and my company.

By four the tablecloths were going on and then china was being placed on the tables. With only two hours until the wedding started all of the big things were done it was just all about the details now. I sent Darby to check out the cake that had arrived. The caterer had sent me a sample plate out to taste in case they needed to make adjustments they would still have time. I sat down on the patio with my plate. As I began tasting I looked up and seen that some of the wedding party had arrived to get ready. The groomsmen were making their way to the pool house where they were to get ready. I saw Kade among them and my heart dropped. He looked over at me casually but quickly turned his head and kept going. I fought back the tears. I had to hold it together, it was Emma's day and this was my job. I finished my plate and quickly got up. Darby came back with a picture of the cake.

"It looks gorgeous Addi. Here take a look." She showed me a picture of the four-tier cake. The cake itself was ivory with pale pink roses cascading down one side.

"Thanks, Dar. Looks great." I told her smiling.

"Addi what's wrong? That was the worst fake smile I've seen you do yet."

"Kade just showed up. He glanced at me and just kept going like he doesn't even know me, Dar." I felt the tears trying to find their way out but I held them in.

"It will be ok. Just focus on the wedding. I'm going to go have a word with the caterer. I tasted the salmon and it needs some seasoning."

I nodded numbly to her. "Tell her the crab cakes to need salt too."

I went back to work and before too long, it was five-thirty and time to check on the bride.