Epilogue.

As much as I love writing, even words can't express how much love I've felt from all of you who read this story and continue to keep it alive every time you open a chapter. Thank you so so much for your support and kindness, and for your thousands of cute and funny comments and all of your chapter votes. It means the world to me to get so much kind feedback on my writing, and I hope this story could put you in a different world for a little while. Here's an epilogue as my way of saying thank you <3

"Louis' not here," Liam said, answering the door with his brows draw together in confusion. "He's out with Niall, I think- did he not tell you?"

"I know," Harry assured, tucking his hands into the pockets of his slim black jeans. "I actually came to see you. Wanna grab a latte with me?"

"Um, yeah, yeah, that's uh... I'll just go grab my wallet," Liam said, looking a little bit flustered as he went to his room to gather his things. Harry understood why.

When Louis and Harry were first slowly rebuilding their relationship, they'd traded secrets almost every night, confessions pooling out of their lips like smoke and disappearing into the night.

It was a pact between them in those first few months. They had to share one secret or one fear every time they spent the night together until there was nothing left hiding between them, until it was natural for Harry to mumbled his worries against Louis' collarbones when they hugged, until Louis got used to tracing slow patterns against the other boy's calloused palms as he admitted the things that bothered him.

One secret every night spent together until there was nothing left for either of them to hide behind.

* * *

"I'm scared that no one will ever want to be with my forever. There has to be some reason why people keep leaving." Harry said, worrying his bottom lip.

* * *

"What if nothing's ever enough for me? Fuck, I binge eat... I binge-drink..." Harry had paused when he heard those words out of Louis' mouth. Louis had never used the term 'binge drink' before, never admitted that his drinking was dangerous a lot of the time. There wasn't anything wrong with having a few drinks. There was a lot wrong with having so many drinks you went unconscious. "I've had my stomach pumped before," Louis whispered, swallowing thickly.  "Twice."

Harry found out the next day that the newspaper Louis was working at part-time was running a story on a girl who had died from binge drinking. They had interviewed her parents.

* * *

"I feel like I see all these big declarations of love everywhere... Niall said I just watch too many sappy YouTube videos... but what if no one ever cares about me enough to do something like that for me?"

* * *

"Sometimes I find it hard to swallow foods," Louis whispered. "Because my throat gets all tight thinking about what it's going to do to my body."

* * *

"I like you better like this, you know?" Harry had said quietly one night when they were snuggling on the couch. "You seem more like yourself now... I don't know why, but before there was always something missing. I like this, it feels real. It feels nice."

Louis smiled so wide his eyes crinkled.

* * *

"I feel like everyone forgets I'm bisexual because I've never dated a girl," Harry said. "Sometimes I wish I would have just dated one when I was younger so people would stop bugging me about it."

* * *

"26," Louis whispered one night. "It's nowhere near exact but..."

"That's...?"

"That's how many."

* * *

"You know, Liam's the one who told me to hide things from you." Louis said one night. "Not that I blame him for everything that lead up to our breakup, but... he did play a role. I didn't want you to hate him, so I didn't... I mean, he always gave amazing advice with my eating problems and he watched out for me when I was drinking and tried his best to keep me from getting hurt. He's never, literally never been wrong about something before.  He's done so much- he's been so much more to me than I could ever repay. So I didn't want you to be mad at him, but yeah. I was kind of bitter about it for a while," Louis sighed. "But I guess everyone has their off days for advice giving, you know?"

"Yeah," Harry said, his brain swirling as he tried to process things. "Yeah, of course."

* * *

It had been three years since the last of their secrets had made it out into open air, four years since they got back together, and ten months since Louis had proposed (in a public park, singing 'I Can't Help Falling in Love' on the ukulele, Harry's friends and family walking out from behind trees and bushes to join in on the last chorus. It was extravagant, and beautiful, and Harry had been crying significantly less those days, but his tear ducts made up for it when Louis sunk to one knee).

In those four years, Louis and Niall had become thick as thieves, while Harry and Liam kept a polite acquaintanceship.

Liam sipped his coffee like he was in an interrogation room. It was decaf, thank God, Liam's foot was bouncing up and down already like he couldn't contain his nervous energy.

Harry took a sip of his latte, weighing his words carefully. "Do you think I'm good enough to marry Louis?" Harry asked gently.

"I, I- of course," Liam stammered, caught off guard. "Harry, of course you are! I know we don't hang out alone much together or anything, but I really do like you, mate. Sorry if that's not coming across."

"Liam," Harry said, his voice gentle but persistent. "I know you were part of the reason why Louis broke up with me, and I was going to let it go because he has, but... we're getting married and you're his best man, and I need to know that I have your blessing. Were you trying to break us up back when I was in first year?"

Liam paused, and for a second Harry felt sorry that he had dragged him out here to ask him about this. But he took a breath, and stood his ground, just like he'd been getting better at these past few years. Therapy had done wonders for him. "I just thought," Liam said so softly Harry could barely hear him over the jangly café music. "I thought that you two had such strong feelings for each other that it scared me."

"How can you possibly have commitment issues on your friend's behalf?" Harry asked, half smiling.

"He's never, never opened up to someone romantically before. "He has me, he has his family, and other than that, he keeps that genuine side of him to himself."

"So you didn't want him to get too invested in his first relationship in case it didn't work out?"

"It would made things so much worse. His drinking, his eating problems, his self esteem... he was in a place where it wasn't too bad... but he was putting so so much into your relationship, if it didn't work out he would have been just... you haven't seen him at his worst," Liam said, a little defensively. "I will do anything to keep him from having to go through that again."

"I get that," Harry nodded slowly.

"But I am sorry," Liam said softly. "You're good for him. You're really good for him. I didn't always see it, but these past few years have been great. And I'm so incredibly sorry for everything that happened in the beginning."

"It's okay," Harry said. "I just needed to know where we stood."

"Well," Liam said slowly. "I think we all grew up a little and learned that love doesn't mean making someone's decisions for them, so it is completely up to you and Louis..."

Harry nodded.

"But if I could chose out of seven billion people someone to be with the person I care about most... I would chose you. You bring something to him that I've never seen before. So, welcome to the family."

Harry reached awkwardly across the table for a hug, but Liam got up and hugged Harry properly, squeezing tight enough to finally close the distance between them.

* * * * *

"You sure you want to do this?" Niall asked, one hand resting on Louis' arm as he waited for confirmation.

Louis nodded. "Yeah," he said a little breathily, nodding again. "Yeah, just... it'll be good."

"Doesn't hurt as much as you think it does, mate," Niall said, turning on the tattoo gun and dipping it into the little pot of black ink. "Last chance to back out," he said, the needle poised over Louis' arm. "These things are forever, you know."

"Forever is good," Louis said, smiling faintly. "I'm good, I promise. Been wanting this one for years."

"Okay," Niall said, raising his eyebrows a little as he started in on Louis' arm. Louis felt the weird sensation of the needle going in, like a cat scratch against his skin. "If Harry doesn't like it, it's not my fault okay?" Niall laughed as he slowly started laying down the line work.

Louis took slow breaths as he tried to distract himself. He'd been with Harry when he'd gotten tattoos before- he was there for the anatomical heart, which took hours. Harry was always comfy and giggly and sleepy when he was getting tattooed, and Louis never understood how he could be that relaxed with a needle in his arm.

He closed his eyes and tried to think of something else.

Harry.

Louis smiled a little, even with the slight pain irritating his skin, as he thought of his boyfriend, probably packing up their apartment in a flurry of papers and banker boxes. Louis thought it was fine to throw everything in boxes and unpack when they got to the new place, but Harry wanted to  do the organizing before the move. Niall came over with cups of tea some nights to try and coax him into taking a break.

They hadn't moved in together until around two years into their relationship, but it was well worth waiting for. And now, with their wedding only days away, they were prepping for a bigger move- a house this time instead of an apartment, and once Louis lifted a giggling Harry over the mantle, a home.

* * *

"Oh fuck I missed you," Harry said, dropping his keys on the floor and heading straight for Louis, who was sitting patiently on the sofa. "Did you have a good day with Niall?" Harry asked, kissing Louis on the cheek and curling up to the older boy, kissing his neck and his jaw softly, loving the way the stubble scratched his lips.

"Mhm," Louis nodded, running his fingers through Harry's curls, which had somehow made it past his collarbones at this point. Harry had been uncomfortable with haircuts ever since that night in first year when he'd cut his hair off, and after Louis had realized why Harry was always 'too busy for a haircut' and why he kept cancelling his appointments at the last minute, Louis had made sure to comfort Harry with compliments on how gorgeous his long hair looked and soon Harry had stopped the cycle of making and cancelling appointments and just let it grow out.

"So is Niall here or...?"

"He's out, babe," Louis murmured, trailing his fingers up Harry's arm.

Harry moved closer to Louis, his eyes darkening as he leaned in to kiss him.

Louis pulled away as Harry started tugging on the belt loops of his jeans.

"Haz," Louis said breathily, "Can we, I don't know, talk for a minute first? How was your day?"

"My day was fine," Harry said, leaning down to suck a lovebite into the curve of Louis' neck, which he knew he shouldn't do so dangerously close to the wedding. "Water pressure got all weird in the shower this morning, I had to call the landlord, they're fixing it tomorrow... finished packing the kitchen supplies... now my really sexy boyfriend is on the couch with me..." Harry slipped his hand underneath Louis' shirt, "Is that enough talking for you Lou?"

Harry's hands slid down to palm at Louis' jeans.

"Harry," Louis said, his voice coming out more ragged than he intended.

"Yeah?" Harry asked, his lips somehow pink as candy already.

"I thought we could wait until the wedding night," Louis choked out, meaning for it to sound more confident, but Harry's hand was still... and it came out more like a question.

Harry dutifully moved his hand away, but seemed to figure Louis' upper body couldn't be off limits at least, and as his tongue distractedly played into the other boy's mouth, he managed to maneuver Louis out of his jacket.

Harry's mouth softly opened as his gaze flickered over to the design on Louis' arm. His eyebrows drew together and he ran a hand through his hair, flicking the long curls away from his face, still straddling Louis' lap.

"What is...?" Harry started, his voice small, one hand still resting on Louis' hip.

"Shit, Haz," Louis sighed. "It was supposed to be a wedding surprise, I just wanted to do it early enough to heal... but someone couldn't wait five minutes to get me out of my clothes." He laughed nervously.

"It's... it's real?" Harry asked quietly, bringing his hand up to his mouth, biting on his finger a little bit like Louis knew he did to steady himself.

Louis nodded. "It's real."

"You know these things are... they're permanent, Lou," Harry said, and the hand that was on Louis' hip started squeezing a little. Harry's eyes were still glossy and round as he looked at Louis' arm.

A dagger.

"Is it for... what," Harry said, "What does it mean?"

"It's for you, love," Louis said quietly. "See the dagger's in the same spot as your rose... means I'm here to protect you. It's the dagger and the rose, babe... a perfect fit. Just like us." Louis' voice wavered a bit at the end. Him and Harry were practically militant about checking up with each other, learning to never hide things, always talking about everything and making sure every part of their relationship was comfortable and that they were understanding each other.

This was probably a big thing to get done without checking in with Harry.

"It's for me?" Harry asked, his voice wavering as his eyes started watering.

"It's all for you, sweetie," Louis said gently.

Harry sniffled and the tears started slipping down his cheeks but he kept his eyes open, wide and green, fixated on the dagger inked onto his boyfriend's arm.

"Is it okay that I did that?" Louis asked gently. "Is it okay that we're matching now?"

Harry nodded furiously, his nails digging into Louis' hip.

"But it's gonna... s'gonna last forever, Lou."

"I know, baby," Louis said, rubbing his arm soothingly.

"You're gonna love me that long?" Harry asked, hiccuping a little from the tears.

"I'm gonna love you that long," Louis said, his voice steady as he locked eyes with the younger boy. "You okay, love?" Louis asked, rubbing soothing circles onto the small of Harry's back.

"Mm okay," Harry said, giggling a little as he swiped at his eyes, trying to recover from his little outburst of emotion. "Just love you so so much, you know?"

"I know," Louis whispered, kissing Harry's feverish forehead. "I love you too."

The End.