I couldn't help but admire every little thing about this man. He was truly beautiful.
Kieran's usually menacing aura and masculine features didn't seem as prominent as he slept. His sharp jawline and piercing green eyes along with his broad masculine shoulders were usually the first thing that I noticed, but as he dozed away-not so much.
I noticed his dark lashes that just dusted his cheekbones as his eyes remained closed. The morning sun just barely peeked in through the window making his tanned skin seem a bit darker. His full lips that seemed to be just a bit more plump made me want to kiss him again even more than usual.
I didn't feel odd observing him like this. He was asleep, so he wouldn't know. He'd probably be quite flattered that I was practically visually raping his face.
Okay, maybe not raping.
We weren't even close to getting it on, actually. I think Kieran felt my uneasiness on the whole subject of us sleeping together, so he stayed on his own side. He didn't hold me or snuggle me. He didn't kiss me goodnight or spoon me as I slept. He just stayed on his side of the bed with his hand on either my shoulder or wrist.
I highly respected him for that, considering the closest I had even been to bumping uglies with a boy is the freaking doctor giving me a breast exam. I don't even think he was impressed by my A-cup boobs.
Not really being able to control my movements, I lifted my hand wanting to caress his beautifully strong jawline until his hand flew up catching mine. His eyes immediately snapped open causing an immediate sense of déjavù to wash over me from last night.
I should have learned by now not to touch him while he sleeps.
I jumped with a loud squeal leaving my lips. Kieran quickly released my hand as he realized that I wasn't someone coming to kill him.
"Sorry," he muttered as he rubbed his sleep-filled eyes. It was only a matter of second before he laid his head back down on the pillow and closed his eyes, again.
"Are you going back to bed?" I asked causing a strange groan-mumble-thing to come out as a response from Kieran. I took it as a no.
"Then what are you doing?" I said looking down at him. He looked so innocent and not deadly for once.
"Reminiscing in the moment," he mumbled after a moment of silence. I made an 'o' with my lips before laying my head back down on my pillow. I didn't close my eyes, though. I just continued to watch him like I had been all morning.
His eyes opened and narrowed on me in a questioning way.
"What are you doing?" Kieran asked. I smiled and answered.
"I'm reminiscing, too." He chuckled briefly before closing his eyes again. "Still reminiscing?"
"No. I was never reminiscing in the first place. I was just hoping you'd let me fall back asleep," he mumbled," but I can see that won't be happening."
I felt kind of bad but I wasn't tired and usually I'm the last one up in the house, so I don't have to worry about waking up before anyone else.
"Well I mean you can-" I started to say before I was interrupted.
"Kieran," Marilyn's voice rang out as there was a series of knocks on the Kieran's bedroom door, "Bolton needs your help at the border." Kieran let out a groan and ran a hand down his face.
"I'll be out," he groaned. He slowly made his way out of the bed making his way to the closet. He looked away as he switched his basketball shorts for a pair of jeans and cover his bare torso with a plain, black t-shirt. In that moment, I kind of regretted not staring at his godly body more this morning.
I turned back to look at him when I was sure he was dressed. As much as I wanted to see him nearly nude, something in me didn't feel comfortable with seeing a man who kidnapped me that way as attracted as I may be to him.
"I'll be back, but for now I want you to stay with Marilyn," he said seriously as he sat on the edge of the bed, putting his socks on. Once he finished, he walked back over to the closet and grabbed a pair of tan work-boots.
"Is something wrong?" I asked noticing his sudden change of attitude.
"Most likely," he said simply as he laced his boots. Kieran didn't anything after that. He stood up and walked over to the stand beside his bed. He picked up the pistol causing my heartbeat to immediately race. He quickly glanced over to me. His eyes scanned up and down my body as if looking for something.
"Calm down. I'm not going to shoot you," Kieran looked back down at the gun. "This is for your protection. You know how to use it?" I shook my head, no. He sighed at walked over to me. Kieran looked even taller than usual as I sat on the bed below him.
"This is loaded. It has six rounds that means you have six chances to kill your target. We don't wound people around here. They come near us, they don't get a chance to live," he said with all seriously. I gulped knowing he was being entirely truthful. Marilyn was going to kill me that night. "You pull this, the hammer, back. The bullet will go into the barrel and squeezing the trigger will launch out the bullet. This gun is never and will never be on safety. Got it?" I gulped. His intense stare becoming anxious. It was obvious he really needed to go.
"Why can't it be on safety?"
"It's a yes or no question," Kieran snapped back. I looked down at the bed and nodded.
"Keeping it on safety wastes time. Switching it off gives them a chance to run, and we're not sprinters. We don't like to chase," he practically spat out the two words.
"Oh. Okay," I answered softly as I took the gun from his hands. I held the cold, metal contraption in my own. It sent a chill through me and I immediately got a bad vibe from it.
I looked up to Kieran who's eyes were trained on me. He looked like he were thinking about something. He took a step forward, almost as if he were going to come closer and grab me into a hug, but he took back his actions and took a few steps back. He glanced down at the metallic death machine in my hand for a moment.
"I'm only doing this to protect you and the rest of the pack," Kieran said softly and then he left.
I didn't leave the room for quite some time. I wasn't sure if I trusted myself around Marilyn with a gun. I wasn't even sure if I trusted myself to be around anyone-including me- holding this gun. At any moment, I could snap and just start shooting people.
Six rounds may not seem like a lot, but that's six lives.
"Arden?" Marilyn shouted from the other side of Kieran's door. Her knuckles bounced off of the wood as she did so.
"Uh, coming!" I shouted from my place on the bed. Worry was laced in my voice as I looked at the pistol once more.
I'm not a killer.
As soon as I stood up off of the bed, Marilyn barged into Kieran's room.
"I said I was coming," I said but came out a bit more annoyed than planned. She narrowed her eyes on me
"Oh dear BFF of mine, I do not care," she retorted. The words almost felt toxic to my ears. Her eye brows raised when she noticed the gun in my hand. "Why do you have that?"
I looked down at the gun and turned my hand to see the metal glint from sun in the window.
"Kieran gave it to me."
"Hmm," she said as she quirked an eyebrow.
"Hmm what?" I asked noticing how she seemed genuinely surprised by the pistol being in my possession.
"Nothing. Let's go," she ushered as she turned around and walked out the door.
Her long, blonde hair bounced against her back as she made her way down the hallway with me trailing behind her.
If only I looked like that.
I couldn't help but envy her. She was one of the most gorgeous people I'd ever seen. She curves in all of the places I didn't which lead me to wonder why wouldn't have she gotten together with Kieran or even Bolton. All three of them look like they just stepped out of a freaking magazine.
And then there's me. The girl who doesn't even know her real name, let alone what she's been for an estimated seventeen years.
Do girls my age usually feel this way or is it just me?
Marilyn and I made our way to the living room. She plopped herself down on the couch, I sat down on the rocking chair next to her. Her legs were crossed as her eyes were trained on me. She looked like she were studying me.
"Um, do you need something?" I asked feeling a bit uncomfortable. I still had the pistol gripped tightly in my hand.
"No," she said shaking her head, "but I am curious." I raised an eyebrow.
"There isn't much to be curious about," I said running my thumb against the cold exterior of the gun.
"Are you joking? Look at you," Marilyn said pointing to me, "you're the daughter of two werewolf parents who was taken and then sent away to an orphanage then had to live the rest of her days in a mad-house. Now, you're here. How is that not intriguing?" My lips formed a flat line.
"Well, when you say it like that," I drug out as I thought for a moment, " what do you want to know?" I asked a bit on edge.
"Did you always think you were crazy?" She said as if she'd been waiting to asked the question her entire life.
"Yes," I said simply. I didn't feel the need to explain why. I'm sure she could tell by the dead look in my eye that I wasn't lying.
"Have you ever killed anyone?" I was instantly taken back by her question.
"No. Never," I said immediately without a second thought. "But you..." I smile came to her lips. It wasn't a sweet smile, it was terrifying. It was evil.
"I've killed more than you can count," she said with all seriousness and not a hint of regret. My jaw dropped and my heart rate quickened.
"Why?" I tried making my voice come out calm, but that wasn't even close to the fearfulness that it came out to be.
Marilyn stopped for a moment and thought. Her perfectly manicured finger came up to her red lips and tapped on it.
"It's how we live. We prefer to be the hunters instead of the hunted." She stated as he looked at me dead in the eye.
"Why would you feel that way?" I asked knowing she wasn't just talking about herself, Kieran, and Bolton.
"Because if we don't defend ourselves, we'll all be dead. We protect our own. That's all." The room instantly seemed ten times quieter. I'm sure you could hear a pin drop.
"I think I'm going to take a nap," I mumbled turning in the chair away from Marilyn.
"You do that," Marilyn said before allowing me to close my eyes. I clicked the safety of the gun and dozed off with the pistol still in my hand.
It was dark. I couldn't see anything. Well, that was before a light was switched on.
"She's asleep," the woman said at the door, but obviously I wasn't asleep. I could see her. My eyes were open.
She had brown hair than went just below her shoulders and what I could tell was blue eyes. I could only see one eye, though. The other half of her face was covered by a black shadow.
"Are you positive?" A man said from what seemed to be quite a distance away.
"Yes, I'm positive. She's right in front of me," the woman said getting a bit closer, but the shadow never faded.
"Just make sure she's okay. The last thing I need is her being taken by some assholes," the man said again.
"She's just a baby. They wouldn't take her from us," the woman said, but she sounded different this time. She sounded older. She sounded like a different person.
I lifted my hands up and looked up at them. I was obviously not a baby. I was my seventeen year old self. This woman must be blind.
"I'm not your baby," I said loud enough for her to hear me. She didn't, though. The woman just looked at me.
"I'm not your baby," I said a bit louder, but the woman still did not hear me.
"I'm not your baby!" I shouted. Again, she did nothing as if my screams had just vanished into thin air.
"They're coming!" The man shouted, but it sounded like two men at once. The woman gulped nervously.
"Coming," the woman said sounding just like the man. Except it was two women talking. I leaned up and tried to reach for the woman but she moved away causing me to fall the floor.
The woman vanished from the room with what sounded like the slam of a door. I slowly stood up from the door and looked around the room. I turned around the see a crib. I slowly glanced inside of it to see a baby. A baby laying in the same crib which was a bed that I was in just seconds ago.
Suddenly, it's eyes opened and I saw one thing.
Grey.
I was drowning in grey. The colors of the room slowly turned to grey. I turned away from the crib and ran to the walls as lamps, teddy bears, pictures all turned grey.
"What's going on?" I said before a came face to face with myself in a mirror.
"I'm grey?" I said out loud as I was the same color as the rest of the room and the baby's eyes. I made my way back over to the baby. I looked in the crib and my heart sank.
It wasn't grey. It wasn't even in the crib.
My eyes snapped open as my body jolted forward. The pistol clattered to the floor and I could do nothing but sit there alone. Marilyn was no longer in the room.
I looked down at my hands the same way I had in my dream. I let out a sigh.
"I'm not grey," I chuckled to myself when it suddenly hit me. I jumped up and ran to the bathroom. I looked in the mirror concentrating on the one thing from my dream that I had recognized almost more than my own reflection in the mirror.
"Grey," I mumbled to myself. The eyes from my dream; they were my eyes.
_______
LONG. TIME NO SEEE.
I know this chapter may not make sense right now but it will soon. I promise.
I'm sorry. Honestly. This is the first time I've truly been on wattpad in a while. I was looking for some books and I was like woah girl. What the hell are you doing.
I FEEL BAD.
It's honestly just difficult to write this story because I know exactly how i want it to go unlike my first book. I only knew where I wanted each chapter to go but now I just want to skip all of the little stuff and I can't. So bear with me.
And I promise there will be more with Kieran but this book is a lot different than the usual werewolf plot so I'm trying to ease is into that.
I've also been working on a new book. I haven't written it yet but I'm writing out the plot and figuring out characters and such. It's gonna be lit.
Okay so you guys are great and voting would be great (just saying wink wink). I love you all and thanks for being so supportive even when I fail at updating. :))))))
Stay awesome Gotham. 11/22/15