Chapter 9

My eyes looked back and forth on my computer screen in front of me, numbers and data of the company I work for going right through my mind without my brain processing any of the information.

I groan, and rub my hands over my face in frustration. Ever since two nights ago I haven't been able to focus on anything at all. It seemed more exhausting than waking up in the middle of a night from a nightmare.

My mind flashed me memories from that night, where I was stuck at Ransoms house to due a snow storm.

Him falling asleep, and even me falling asleep.

Me waking up again from the same nightmare, just way more intense, and him trying to calm me down from my screaming

I rolled my eyes. He just wanted to calm me down so he could go back to sleep.

Then I remembered me stumbling everywhere, leaving his house. Using the crutches I was given quite horribly.

And we haven't talked since then. We cuddled I guess, but I'd rather not talk about it that much.

My phone buzzing in my pocket snapped me out of my thoughts, and I reach down to grab it, Berkeleys name lighting up my screen.

I press the green answer button and raise it to my ear.

"What's up?" I ask

"Can you do me a huge favor?" She pleads.

"Sure. What do I have to do?" I furrow my brows in concern.

"Well Jadens parents surprised us by coming to town with literally no notice, and I can't take care of Ransom tonight. Can you watch over him?" Berkeley explains quickly over the phone.

I cringe. Is she serious?

"Berkeley I don't work with you? I have no clue how to do your job." I shake my head in disbelief.

"Stop shaking your head mister," I look around suspiciously. Can she see me? "I'm sending you over as a friend. Not as a care taker. I just need someone to be with him tonight and make sure he takes his medicine without doing crazy shit. Please?" She pleads again.

"Berk..." I sigh.

"You said you'd do it! I asked for a favor and you said sure. I'm counting on you to be there at 8pm tonight." She successfully declares.

Fuck her and her loopholes.

"Fine! But you owe me." I mumble.

"Thank you so much Ky! And I'll pay for your coffee for a week, how about that?" She reasons.

"Two weeks." I bargain.

The other end of the phone is silent for a moment, as she debates my offer, before sighing and giving in. "Alright fine, two weeks. But one coffee a day." I can feel her intense stare through the phone.

"Two weeks it is then! I'll be over at his place at 8."

———

And here I was, nervously standing outside of his door.

I close my eyes and raise my hand to knock.

This was gonna be awkward as hell.

A few seconds pass before I hear his door unlocking, as he opens it, clearly surprised when he saw me.

"Kyle?" Ransom asks.

"I'm covering for Berkeley tonight." I simply explain before he can question me.

He hesitates, biting his bottom lip in contemplation whether to let me know or not.

Did Berkeley even tell him about this? Or get his permission to do this?

He opens his apartment door wider to let me in.

I awkwardly give a small nod in greeting, and look around his apartment.

Definitely more clean since the last time I was here, although there were unopened bottles of different types of alcoholic drinks littering his kitchen counter.

"Why so many?" I turn to ask Ransom, who's leaned against the wall behind him, watching me carefully.

"Takes the pain away. Works better than pills." He shrugs.

I sigh.

"Want to try?" He tilts his head, still watching me carefully.

"Even if I did drink, that would be a hard no. I'm here to do Berkeleys job or whatever." I look back at the bottles, and I hear him stand up straight, and walk slowly towards me.

"Are you sure?" I hear him say quietly, obviously very close to me at this point.

I turn and look at him, and push him away by placing my hand on his chest and shoving harshly.

He barely moved.

"I'm positive. I don't have any reason on why I should take it." I almost growl.

He lets out a chuckle. "Lies. You have the same thing I do. We're both a little fucked up from the past."

I felt myself take a deep breath, trying not to lose my chill. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

He takes a few steps closer to me, and I take a few steps back with each one he takes forward.

"I recognize PTSD when I see it. You're constantly alert, you see things that you never want to see again, overtaking anxiety pills...and seeing the same therapist. The night terrors as well are all a dead giveaway." He points out.

Man, this bitch-

"Night terrors? Listen here, nothing happened between us the other night. You didn't experience anything." I narrow my eyes, and a grin just merely tugs at his lips.

"Really? Is that what you think?" His eyes skim across my face.

"It's not what I think, but it's what happened."

"So I didn't calm you down after a second nightmare in the same night?" He asks, but with a tone that is dripping with sarcasm.

"No. You didn't do anything." I retort.

He doesn't say anything, but instead just takes a step back. Ransom closely keeps an eye on me, and I felt my breathing begin to become labored.

"I need air." I mutter, before pushing past him and out of his apartment.

I climb the nearest stairs and find myself on the top of the apartment complex building, overlooking the lights that brightened Albuquerque.

My mind travels back to my life before I disappeared from it. The snow, forests instead of deserts, just simple things like that, I have missed immensely.

But it's for the better. I can't go back to it. I would literally be frowned upon. And running away didn't make things look any better.

I take a deep breath, and wrap my hand around the ring that always rested around my neck after I had pulled it out from under my shirt. I was already calming down.

I hear a door squeak open, and I already know who it is. He just doesn't know how to leave people alone.

I hear him come up and stand next to me by the roof railing, before putting down an opened bottle.

I glance down at it, and back up at him, and he shrugs, before taking a swig of his own drink.

I roll my eyes. "I'm not drinking that."

I watch him look out at the city as he shrugs, not arguing with me. "Suit yourself."

I glance back down at the drink, and ignore it as I look back over to the city lights.

"Can I know who the ring belongs to?" I see Ransom look at me, but I sigh.

"It belongs to me." I respond as I tuck it back under my shirt.

He snorts. "It seems way more sentimental than that to be just yours."

I manage to smile in amusement as I shook my head. "No one knows who the ring belongs to, and I plan to keep it that way."

He turns his body towards me, still leaning on the cement roof railing with his elbow, drink relaxed in his other hand. "Secrets come out eventually, you know?"

I look over at him. "Why are you so interested in it anyways?"

He just studies me. Like always. I guess it's a thing he just does. "Because you interest me."

I feel my breathing catch in my throat.

For someone who says he isn't gay, that was hella gay of him to say.

Our eyes catch contact, and we both don't look away. I don't say anything back to him. What was I supposed to say?

He slowly leans in a little towards me, but before he could go any further, I grab the bottle and read the label, facing away from him.

"Rosé. You have fancy taste." I add a little humor to my voice.

"It's one of the lightest drinks I have. I'm sure you wouldn't want scotch or things along those lines. You don't seem to be a drinker." He looks back to the city, taking another drink out of his bottle.

I open the bottle, before downing the liquid. I groan and pull away at the burning going down my throat. "How do you drink so much?" I lightly laugh, still really grossed out by the burning in my throat.

"I drink to forget. Sometimes it's better than remembering." He simply explains.

I raise my eyebrows slightly in concern, before taking another sip, even if I was still disgusted at the drink.

"Like you said, I guess we're both a little fucked up from the past." Pulling the bottle away from my mouth, I already start to feel slightly bubbly. Happy? Artificially.

"I thought you didn't drink?" Ransom glances over at me.

"Yeah, me too." I roll my eyes before slowly sipping the drink, enjoying the taste more and more as I downed the bottle.

We began to joke around over stupid things, and I haven't felt this excited in a long time.

He asked me simple questions, ones that weren't infringing on my past. And I did the same. Just simple ice breakers.

His favorite color is red, he loves pasta, especially linguine. I told him that I could make a mean Mac and cheese, and he just laughs.

We eventually die down with the bubbly and giggly energy, and just look at lights flicker on and off in tall buildings surrounding us.

Out of my peripherals, I see him look over at me, and I look back at him.

"What are you doing to me, Kyle?" Ransom barely whispers.

What?

I laugh, and step closer to him to nudge him playfully with my shoulder. "I'm not doing anything."

He doesn't respond, and I quiet down my laughter. Oh, it's serious time I guess.

I lock gazes with him again, and each and every time we do this, it's more intense and harder to get out of than the last.

He looks really attractive right now. Like, really attractive.

The long sleeves on his navy blue shirt are rolled up to barely above his elbows, the lights making it possible to see his fluffy black hair. I can barely make out the dark brown eyes under the nighttime sky. And his lips...

I'm suddenly leaning up to kiss him.

This clearly shocks him, as I feel his body tense up, but relaxes quickly nonetheless.

It's only when he begins to respond to me kissing him, is when I pull away.

My eyes are wide.

I didn't mean to do that.

I step away from him, and I awkwardly point at him, and then to the door.

"I need to go prepare your medicine." I barely manage to somehow get out, and quickly walk off the roof and down the apartment steps.

I hear him call my name, but I shake my head and continue to make my way into his apartment.

I'm frantically moving around his small kitchen, trying to read the labels on the bottles, so I can give him what he needs for tonight.

"Kyle, Kyle calm down." I hear him rush in after me.

I didn't even notice how frantically I was moving around until he told me to calm down.

I shake my head. "No, I need to do my job. Berkeley trusted me to watch over you carefully tonight and I can't fail her." I almost cry.

I feel guilty. So guilty for kissing him.

I wasn't ready to move on, not in my right mind.

I feel Ransom place his hands on my waist before turning me around to face him.

"Ransom, please I have to get you your medi-" I begin to stumble with my words, but he shuts me up by placing his mouth over mine.

Oh?

Oh!

It's clear that he's hesitant at first, but with me not pulling away, he grows more confident as our lips move together.

He bites my bottom lip, asking for entrance, in which I easily gave him. He invades my mouth, and I can taste his drink on him.

I feel my hands coming up from the counter and resting on the side of his face, as he pulled me closer into him.

He slipped his thigh in between my legs and I moaned into the kiss.

He pulls away, and I almost whimper at the loss of contact, but I needed to catch my breath. His lips traveled down my neck, biting and teasing me every so often.

I wasn't in my normal, correct mind right now. If I was, I would have stopped him from grabbing underneath my legs and lifting me on the counter.

I would have stopped him and the way he continued to kiss me.

But all I knew right now, is that I wanted him. Badly.

So I didn't stop him from taking me to his bedroom.

And I didn't stop anything that may have happened after that...