41

My brain could not stop reiterating Edward's smile he had thrown upon me. That was not a sneer, it did not look coerced either. He did all of that with such a sincere demeanor; surely it was the first time after years being concealed with a poker face. Sure, it was not the same grin I missed dearly, but it was equally as contagious and poetic.

It was worth a thousand watts or even more—my physics skills were useful after all—to the point where it could power up the entire town in one go.

I pedaled all the way home, my soul felt like it gained wings and soared through the skies without restrictions. I was like a bird breaking free of the cage filled with the horrors of school and the lingering dilemma I had suffered from the previous night. The way his eye softened and brightened, how his frown dissolved made him more delicate than ever and made me swoon like a fangirl.

These moments were all that I've been waiting for. This was the ultimate plan: make Ed feel safe around me. Make him feel like he could vent to me without any issues.

Make him trust me.

My euphoria has now reached beyond a mere description of words. Never in my life did I badly want to squeal right now, hopping up and down, not caring what the public thought of me. That was a truly rare moment that deserved to be treasured at all cost.

My broad grin never ceased as I sauntered with bouncy steps into the living room. Not surprisingly, odd looks from both Mom and Jordan grazed upon me. He lay slouched on the sofa with headphones like usual, but I rather spend my energy mentally dancing than bothering his grouchy demeanor.

"You were all gloomy this morning, and now you look like you just won a lottery," Mom's remark was like a needle popping the balloon consisting of all of my fantasies. "What is this drastic change in mood?"

"W-Well, it's finally the weekend!" I blurted out, my brain surprisingly coming up with some reasonable excuse, although Mom raised her brow quite incredulously. "I was also thinking about making Dad's new salt bread rolls for my friends!"

"Ah yes, they'll be great volunteers. Your dad's preparing the dough tonight once he gets home and bake them in the morning. He said he's planning to do some taste-testing," revealed Mom, as she smacked her fist. "What are you guys doing?"

"Aly and I are going to Lynn's house, and do our biology project together." I didn't know why but I had the need to smile as I folded my hands.

"Oh, Lynn?" Her low side ponytail flipped to the back as she shot her head up. Stars suddenly sparkled with might in her light blue eyes—the same ones I have inherited. "You don't know how happy I am when you're hanging out with them again. They used to come here often, remember?"

I nodded silently—of course I did. I was already imagining our childhood group slouched on my couch, playing DS or cards, sipping the milkshakes Mom had made. The reminders of much I traded Pokemon with Edward or Aly lingered all about.

Mom then rolled her sleeves and arms, snapping me back to reality. She giggled as she suggested, "Next time get all of them to come to the restaurant! I'll cook lots, and I guarantee you, I'm now much better than your father!"

Sure thing, Mom. I laughed and shook my head.

My parents had always given Edward and the gang a lot, and I meant a hella lot of food; ranging from homemade blueberry muffins Dad and I made together for the first time, burgers, chicken bites and so much more. Most of these snacks were targeted towards Aly though, as in their eyes, she was 'the chosen one'... as per Dad's words.

Well, she was the one who first approached me in kindergarten, after all. I would always search for some obscure hiding spots rather than friends, and Aly never failed to discover me in every single one of them.

"Let's play together! Just you and me if you are scared of everybody else!" She would then extend her hand at the trembling, little me, oblivious of all the future memories I would be making along with her. Had she not pulled me out back then... I would probably end up with no one.

"Also... so that means Edward is joining in too, right?" Mom's head popped out from the kitchen—I did not even realize she had walked back and disappeared into her favorite spot. And well, as expected, my nerves jumped.

"Y-Yeah, he'll be there." My voice lowered as my fingers were twitchy. "He said he wanted to try the salt bread."

"He always loved your father's pastries, always gulping them down in one go." She grinned impishly. "Guess he's still a little boy at heart. Gotta give him more then!"

I sighed and looked back, noticing Jordan had pushed one of his headphones out of his ear—and this guy clearly stated he couldn't care less about my business. He glanced up from his gadget as his straight, thin lips shifted into a disdainful smile.

"Edward, huh? So that's your boyfriend's name," Jordan retorted and made me all tense up. Plugging his headphones off, he stood up and pulled his hood from his head.

"Like I told you he's not my boyfri—"

"Lucianna has two older brothers, and Edward is one of them. No wonder they looked so awfully similar," Jordan revealed, intentionally bumping into my shoulders as he walked past me. "Ain't that amazing we got the same taste."

The fact he had to put emphasis on that one word... Before I had the chance to retort, he was already climbing up the stairs. His footsteps faded away when the door to his room clicked shut. God... my patience is always running thin with him.

Thankfully, I did not have to ponder too much about him when my pocket suddenly buzzed. Fumbling for my phone, I glanced at the notification on the screen, expecting Aly or perhaps Edward.

I blinked twice when instead, it was Seb.

Seb: Hey Ren :)

Right... he already has my phone number. Without further ado, I punched on my keyboard, typing in my response as I simultaneously walked up the staircase. Perhaps he's hitting me up regarding our hangout on Sunday?

Rena: Hi Seb! What's up?

Seb: What time are you going tomorrow?

Rena: Depends on Aly. Ed said he'll wait for us though around like 9 or 10 am. Hbu?

Seb: Going to be late tom lol

Seb: I have work to be taken care of first

Just like Ed, Seb's also diligent with his job it seems. I glanced up momentarily. Perfect timing to go ask.

Rena: Oooo what kind of work?

Seb: My fashion designs :) I also have to model for new clothing releases.

Opening the door to my room, I read the text all over again as though I did not have a single clue of Seb's overall background.

Well, why did that come off as a shock; the Allingtons were blessed with the talent of fashion design, appearing in various magazines—I never had the chance to see Seb in the cover—and fashion shows. They were the masterminds behind the prom dresses and garments that had women throwing out their wallets. There were even rumors our school uniform was heavily influenced by them.

The sketchbook Seb carried when we used to hang out contained all of his own creations with colorful sticky notes strewing all over the page. We—yes, even Aly—would ogle upon his sketches with admiration for hours, never getting bored of all their aspects. He would also give us a chance to see his artworks being fabricated in real life; he once gifted me one of those dresses for my birthday.

Well, that was why he was so highly strung about choosing his apparels. He would fastidiously criticize every single apparel in existence, including Edward's preference in clothes. He doesn't know how to stop sometimes though...

Rena: Oooo I remembered you showing us all of your work, and theyre all so good!

Seb: Thx thx! It's always an honor ;)

I sank myself into my bed, my eyes remained still on the message board when another text from him arrived swiftly.

Seb: Btw about our hangout on Sunday, Ed's gonna come too. He said he's also looking for Lynn's present

Seb: Kinda odd. That guy was 100% set on buying that hoodie. Maybe my advice finally got through him? lmfaoo

I found myself chuckling before I allowed my entire body to collapse against my mattress, finding comfort in its coolness.

Rena: Haha he said the shipping fee was expensive, so he'll be looking for it in-store.

And now, it was kind of odd that Seb's rapid response took a while, but I shrugged it off.

Seb: oh what he didn't tell me that :v he just said he's gonna find something else

Yeah well, perhaps it had something to do with Seb's endless nagging that Edward decided to end it all for once. I wonder how many times he had to endure his best friend's constant jabs.

Seb: you know what, last year Ed bought a really horrific set of clothes for her

Seb: shockingly, she accepted them. If I was her, I would be throwing a hissy fit

Jesus Seb. Yeah, of course Ed will give you the stink eye. I breathed a sigh, but my smile did not disappear.

Rena: He has a completely different taste than yours, just let him be lol

Seb: His choice of clothes are so monotone, and when he tries to wear something bright, they mismatched!

Rena: His gray hoodie last week was good tho!

Seb: That's because it's his only decent clothing.

Seb: Don't tell all of this to Ed though. He'll murder me in my sleep 😂

Rena: He already knows how much you hate his taste anyway lol

Seb: You'll be in trouble as well Ren .-. U know how easily irritable he is

Easily irritable...

"His temper issues... I think it's getting kinda worse." Lynn's words did not hesitate to echo in my mind, giving me a reminder of his behavior.

I set my phone down on my side as the ceiling became the center of my attention. That was something I could not deny, as I had personally witnessed some of his blowups and with both of his friends pointing it out, no defense could refute it. The way he slammed his fists, the way he nearly attacked Alfred yesterday, the way he nearly beat those boys in PE to a pulp if not for Lynn...

Nearly.

I blinked.

It was all nearly. Did it not mean... in some way or another, he at least tried to control his temper? It looked like he put so much effort to stop his rage from boiling over, although he might have failed a few times. And the way he looks at me when he's about to punch that senior—

My phone vibrated within the confines of my fingers, but this time it was not from Seb's message board. The notification bubble descended from the top of the screen, revealing the sender.

Edward: Hello. Are you at home?

Every single time I saw a text coming from him, my heart always leaped a thousand miles, and that was not an exaggeration. Even as we had texted multiple times by now, my body refused to act as though we had been friends for a while.

Rena: Yup! Just arrived :)

Edward: Can I call you?

A moment of silence ensued, before I found myself gasping and abruptly hauling myself up. My mouth dangled open at this sudden message I had received, and now both my heart and stomach were erratically fluttering and flying, as though they were attempting to make an escape. Come on Rena, calm yourself down. This is another blessing!

I instinctively brushed my tangled mess of hair and slapped both of my hot cheeks. With a giant but satisfying gulp, my tingling fingers typed in the consent.

Rena: Sure!

And not even seconds later, the anticipated call from my crush came through. Reluctance might have tried to stop me from punching the green button, but against all odds, I pressed hard on it and held my phone close to my ear as I squeaked, "H-Hey!"

"Hello Rena." Edward's soft but piercing voice on the other end of the line sent chills across my spine. "I hope I'm not bothering you or anything."

"Oh, a-absolutely not! I... I'm just resting in my bed right now!" I exclaimed, as though he needed to know such useless information filled with my stupid stammers.

"That's good," he mumbled as I heard shuffles in the background. "I know you might be sick and tired of hearing this again, but thank you so much for today. I really had a good time."

"It doesn't matter, Ed, and I'm not tired of it," I immediately denied his statement. I would never show contempt for his constant gratitude, why should I? "A-As long as you're feeling better, then all is good."

Edward's breaths filled in the speakers of my phone, causing my ears to heat up. "When I say I feel comfortable around you, I meant it," he suddenly blurted. "I know I said it out of nowhere, but... it's true." His voice fainted into a murmur. "You understand me, Rena, like you always do."

Like you always do. I felt like I was about to explode right now as I gripped hard on my phone. Ed was about to be charged with first degree murder against me at this point...

"T-Then perhaps, we should do this often, y'know... hanging out when you're not on your shift," I whispered, my trembling lips articulating out the words slowly. I should not be saying embarrassing stuff at this point. "Then, we can go somewhere nice and chill... and we can talk a lot more too..."

I said it.

I said what I've always wanted; those words that I could not get out.

However, Edward said nothing and we were engulfed in our own thoughts instead. The hairs on my skin erected as my muscles were all in high alert. Why was he not answering anything? It made me feel like I have spoken something so half-witted it deserved no reply. Even his typical retorts were already enough—

"Yes. Yes of course," he suddenly agreed, jolting me out of my reverie. He then cleared his throat as I, for some reason, could picture him smiling like he did earlier. "I don't mind. I'd like to, Rena."

And now, I was the one grinning like a dolt, already enraptured by all the stuff we could potentially do; just the both of us.

***

Saturday.

Dressed up in a white T-shirt underneath a blue dungaree dress and a black beret, I comfortably sat on the couch and waited for Aly to come. As much as she had visited my home countless times, my hope was that she did not end up in the middle of nowhere.

Last night I joined Dad as we made the dough for the salt bread rolls. While slumber was my priority early in the morning, he had baked them all in the oven and left a handful on the counter before he left. Obviously, I did not hesitate to grab two of them and shoved them into my mouth.

Even with the large amount of salted butter we had used, the richness was so on point and had me hum with approval. The pillowy insides and the crisp crust were extra points as well. I could eat this over and over again.

I slurped up my drool when the doorbell finally sounded, and I promptly paced towards the entrance, sighing in relief when I did not have to pick her up at some random stop. There stood Aly, wearing a cream thin sweater and knee-length jeans alongside her school backpack. Her hair was tied high into a ponytail with her star hairpin on her left side of her head.

"Yo Rena, you looked so adorable today!" Aly whistled, her gaze examining me up and down as though I was a piece of gold. "Rocking with that dress!"

"T-Thank you...!" I squeaked at the compliment, consciously looking at myself before I guided her to the living room, where she waved her hand at Mom in acknowledgement. "Quite surprised by your sense of direction. It's finally right."

"Hey, I paid so much attention to the streets this time! I even made sure to double—no, triple check everything!" Aly pouted, shaking her hand rapidly while she puffed up her chest. I simply chuckled at her lively reaction. She did make some progress there.

However, before I could initiate anything else, my best friend beelined straight for the dining room, her green eyes having noticed the tray of salt bread in the table. Well, who could blame her when these golden brown pastries were just sitting there, patiently waiting for someone to pick it up?

"Yoo, what are these?! They look so delicious and smell so amazing!" She cried. "God, I just had my breakfast but is this making me so hungry, what the hell?!"

"My dad's new recipe for salt bread rolls, and I made some too!" I explained, placing my hands on my back.

"Can I have one, like right now?! I wanna try!" Her hands were already twitching like crazy, but she resisted such temptation, standing back until the permission was given. However, when she realized I did not give any signals but rather I fiddled with my fingers, she briskly folded her hands together.

"Ooo, are they... for Edward, hmm?" Aly grinned, wiggling her brows.

"Well, they are for you guys, but um..." I quickly looked down. "I promised him to be the first one to try it out, so well... you can have your portion a little later..."

"No problemo! I bet he's gonna like them, because man, they look sexy!" Aly saluted as she stepped back before she fawned. "Ahh, you two are such relationship goals!"

Relationship, huh?

Forging a close friendship with Edward realistically could occur—and that was what we had been doing, but officially dating him... that was another different story. Sure, my delusional self did conjure up images of us holding hands  as we went out together and pressing our lips against each other. That always caused me to completely turn beet red in less than a few minutes.

However, did he even have the same feeling for me? Did he ever consider me to be... a potential girlfriend?

Asking him out feels... so out of reach.

***

A/N: What do you think of Sebastian?