37

Rena.

The moment Edward uttered my childhood—been so long since he referred to me as that—nickname, I believed to the fullest extent of my own perception, my heart practically performed a series of acrobatics that might dazzle the Olympics. With its irrational thumps, it somersaulted a few times before it plummeted from its place.

Honestly, I should have been dead by now, but luck was on my side. Here I was, surviving the rest of these painstaking classes whilst forcing myself to recuperate and gather my thoughts. And it was not helping that I could not stop grinning like a maniac as warmth flowed through my veins. Huge progress in our friendship!

Other than that, my mood further elevated a notch when I received an actually decent grade for a chemistry exam. Perhaps after countless misfortunes, fate took pity on me and compensated with luck after luck. I skipped out of the class as I imagined all kinds of rainbows and unicorns—most of my classmates flunked it.

Pride overwhelmed me while I flipped through the pages. Most of my answers I had guessed were shockingly true, and some of the incorrect answers had me scratching my head. My peripheral vision helped me slip through the crowd, but unfortunately, that one asshole senior just had to be there, playing with his phone.

Stupid jerk. I snapped back to my papers as I casually strolled by him, pretending he never existed. Flashbacks of the brawl between him and Edward played—how his provocation almost had my friend punching him square in the face. That's what you get for annoying people.

Now that I thought of it... this douchebag was among the team when Seb introduced me to them. Obviously, he would recognize me as the girl who Seb befriended and who wordlessly stood beside Edward. However, no attention was given; he spared a glance at neither me nor anyone near him.

Thank God, he didn't notice me. I heavily sighed in relief when he was out of my radar. With him out of my way, I stalked towards my locker. Well, at least Edward calmed himself a little back at the field... and we got to exchange a couple of words.

"You get a B in chemistry?" A voice manifested from beside me and my shoulders legit jumped. Fortunately it was just Aly—she was thrusting her textbooks on the locker, then grabbing her phone charger and some folders along.

"Yup!" I beamed. "It was like a dream. I thought I was gonna fail."

"Good for you, but guess what... I got an A! An actual Godsent!" Aly revealed between her victorious chuckles before she stuck out her tongue. "All that studying Mark forced me to do finally paid off. I beat ya!"

A timid smile made its way across my lips without an effort—my best friend could be so adorable and whimsical. "Congratulations, but you still have a long journey to go to be on par with me. Biology, history—"

"I terribly sucked at those things, yes I know, no need for a reminder. Sam and Naomi I can handle, but if that's coming from my bestie, it hurts so much..." Aly whined, extending a hand right in front of my face while the other one clenched on her chest. She then protruded her lips to form a pout, but her mentioning 'bestie' induced some sense of delight to bloom inside me.

"It's the truth though." I poked fun at her.

"No matter what I do, Rena... those subjects, I had enough, man. My only objective is to pass high school with flying colors." She balled one of her hands. Shaking it in the air, she exclaimed, "I'm burning all of that shit out the moment we graduate!"

I laughed and shook my head at her tendency to dramatize her actions—not that I minded anyway. When we were done organizing our things, both of us simultaneously clicked the padlock shut. Time to get the heck out of here.

"Putting my misery aside, you and Edward had been getting so much closer lately." She grinned, placing her arms on the back of her head while my stomach flipped at her comments. "You guys are getting more comfortable with each other. Like, you're approaching him without our help! I couldn't be any more proud."

"Oh.. um, thank you," I blurted, quickly lowering my head when the heat decided that it was best to rush over to my cheeks. For some reason, the outlines of the floor tiles were more interesting to gaze at.

"God, how much you have come to be. Back then, you used to hide behind me or Sam all the time, y'know," she said and I pressed my lips in a straight line. Not that she was wrong. "Then she and Naomi called you Tomato because they thought your stuttering and blushing were cute."

"It's not endearing at all..." I grumbled. "It's annoying. I-I can't look people straight in the eye and talk properly. I was..." I paused, huffing. "...such a mess."

"I know how much you hated it, Rena, which is why I'm happy you've improved," Aly convinced, "Girl, you're much more independent and braver now. Look, you managed to go to the basketball team without me."

And that was because Seb helped me. I was still way too far from improving. Independence and bravery were not the words to describe myself. I still froze in my spot, I still could not express how I felt, I still could not stand up for myself, I still stutter like a fucking idiot, I still—

"Hey, hey Rena, don't push yourself too hard okay? You can't just change overnight, but you're there, you're slowly coming out," Aly's usual piercing voice was as soft as it could get—perhaps she noticed how I was just there... dead silent, like the usual me. "My mom, she always told me, baby birds don't just fly, they fall first."

I still could not bring myself to look at her.

"If you are still thinking about Florence, let me go and kick her for you. She can go fuck herself, seriously." She heaved. "Naive and too kind, my ass."

"Ah, y-you don't have to do that! I... I was just... carried away." I instantly stopped her on her tracks, but the way she blinked and raised her brow... she definitely did not believe me. "B-But thank you so much, Aly."

Smacking Florence would not do much—Aly's consolation was much more significant for my confidence to slowly assimilate together again. She had already done enough; she was not only my best friend, she was practically my guardian during those times. She always ensured I was safe and sound, and that was adequate.

I was so grateful to meet a friend like her.

When we were heading to the lobby, I stopped in the middle of the stairs when Edward stood there in the main entrance, with none of his friends around him. He was dressed back to our school uniform, but his blue tie was absent, and his blazer was unbuttoned.

Was he waiting for someone? For... me?

"Speak of the devil. Now this is your chance!" Aly breathed as she gently pushed me towards him. "Okay, I have to go help the volleyball team now. Naomi's probably waiting for me, so have him all to yourself. See ya tomorrow!"

"Oh, um bye!" That came out as a husky whisper, she most likely did not catch it. With Aly gone, I was all alone, but this time Edward was right in my sight. Don't lose your confidence. Just don't be a brainless idiot.

I awkwardly approached him, taking deep breaths and mentally preparing myself. With his hands hidden in his pockets, his bracelet dangled on his wrist. Thankfully, traces of his remaining fury had evaporated off his face, leaving only his usual sharp and expressionless gaze. As soon as he noticed me, his eye immediately softened.

"Rena," he greeted.

Good heavens, I was still not used to him calling me that.

"H-Hey Ed!" I could finally refer to his nickname without feeling weird, but my voice cracked. Of course, I spent no time rebuking myself for becoming what I had been trying to avoid. Aly's advice better stick in with you!

"Are you going home?" he asked.

"Ah yeah, what's up?"

"I... I'm going to my work, and I need some company again." He was reluctant, but he squeezed it all. "You're not busy, right?"

"Oh no, not at all! Let's go."

I found myself accepting his request without contemplating further, unlike my first time with him. The fact I had spent so much time with Edward for these few days, had giddiness swelling within me, unfolding like a flower opening its petals.

Aly was right. I had gained most of his trust and it was all well deserved.

***

If only my bike could handle Edward's weight, I would have given him a ride. Instead, I ended up having to haul it as we walked down the streets together like last week. Well, at the very least, my bicycle's basket could fit in his bulging backpack, liberating the load off his shoulders for a little while, but he adamantly insisted on carrying it upon himself.

As he ambled in front of me, my eyes were focused on the lightsaber keychains bouncing and swaying at every step he took. It was not alone now; it was accompanied by another lightsaber of a different color, scarlet red—and that was when my attention reverted to the accessories in our wrists. Right, it was just like the color of our bracelets.

I furiously shook my head, shoving the bizarre thought of him wanting to complement our bracelets aside. It was probably a coincidence; the famous lightsabers bore those colors!

"D-Do you still love Star Wars?" I decided to ask.

"Not as much... but I still re-watch the prequels occasionally," Edward answered, glancing over his shoulders. "I found these small lightsabers in my grade school collection box and thought of using them," he breathed, as though he was aware those keychains initiated our conversation.

"Ah, yeah, you used to show me before," I recalled.

He nodded. "They're kind of frail and old, but I don't want to dispose of them; people said they're limited edition nowadays. You can't find them pretty much anywhere."

Immediately the comment conjured up an image of little Edward in my head. He was grinning from cheek to cheek as he flaunted all his merchandise, proving his loyalty with the sci-fi franchise. If I remembered correctly, he had countless action figures, one of them being a hairy beast named Chewbacca and a round, small droid.

"Y-You put so much effort in finding those items anyway, I wouldn't throw them out," I said between my laughs.

Edward ran his hand through his blond hair, and needless to say, he refrained himself from disturbing the bangs that completely shielded his scarred eye. "That's also true... but I'm kind of moving on to other things, so I don't really mind."

I tilted my head. "Like?"

It took some time for him to respond. "Music, I guess... like Coldplay and Linkin Park."

"I can tell. You have lots of their songs on your iPod; I guess you bought and downloaded all of their albums?" I asked, my mouth twitching to form a smile as I carefully steadied my bike to avoid an opened manhole. God... does it feel so good talking to him like this.

"They're all exceptional. I don't feel like listening to music from other artists." Edward sighed. "My sister's normally the one recommending me."

Lucianna. Her name popped up in my head as I envisioned the youthful girl with fiery red hair who was walking alongside Jordan. Him being friends with her and me with Ed... this is such a small world, after all.

"W-Well, there are many amazing artists with great songs out there. Not just Coldplay."

"Who do you recommend to me then, Rena?" The way his eye zoomed straight at me as soon as he whirled around made me gulp.

"Hmm, l-let's see..." I found myself staring at the orange skies, anywhere but meeting with Edward's piercing gaze. "The Script, OneRepublic and Imagine Dragons—they have the same vibes as Coldplay, so you might e-enjoy their music."

"I've heard of them. I'll check them out and let you know," he said. I bobbed my head, my hands gripped tight against my bike's handlebar, inducing some sweat on my palms. I hope he doesn't notice how... jittery I am right now.

"By the way... how are you feeling right now?" I questioned, now questioning his current condition—he still had not fully recovered, after all.

"I'm fine. I'm not sick anymore... just pissed about that idiot." Edward's tone slightly shook. "Not as bad though, thanks to Seb, Lynn and you."

I inhaled and exhaled a ridiculously huge amount of the rejuvenating air when I was included in the bunch, as I felt redness seeping into my cheeks. Despite everything, I could not help but to beam at that. At least he knows I care for him.

"W-What's his name?" I remembered that senior being alone in the busy hallway.

"Alfred. Asshole would be a good alternative," Edward grumbled before he stopped on his path. "We're going right, Rena."

"Ah yes, yes a-alright!"

Damn it, I was way too engrossed with myself that I had completely forgotten about the directions to his workplace—not that I vividly remembered myself anyway. I abruptly turned my bike, trying to maintain its balance, however, when he quickly swerved into another discussion, it had me nearly drop everything.

"Do you... feel comfortable if I called you Rena? Or should I stick with Serena?"

There was one conclusion I could jump into without further inquiry; this guy was practically seeing through all of my reactions. The wheels of my bicycle groaned as I slowed down a little—I had to muster all of my composure and stop freaking out at literally every single unexpected thing Edward did. Was he always this perceptive though?

"Y-Yeah, you used to call me Rena anyway!" I tried to be as collected as possible while speaking to him. "Not that I was bothered..." I whispered.

"Everyone was calling you Rena, and so I felt out of place. Seb still called you Ren for some reason... but not that I cared," Edward murmured as he looked away, studying the cars that whizzed by him while his tousled hair tagged along with the breeze. "It's just that we've... not been interacting for a while... and now that we're... friends... you're okay with it."

"Of course! Actually I-I like Rena better, so don't worry too much about it..."

My voice trailed off as soon as my brain fully processed his last comment filled with pauses, and out of pure instinct, I peered down at my own shoes as some invisible force pressed against my ribs. Not that he was wrong... since that day our childhood group crumbled into oblivion, "friends" was not a proper term to describe all of us—friends would not avoid greeting each other or treating each other like they were mere classmates.

But we're back as friends, so none of those events in the past really matters, right?

That did not explain why I felt as though something was off.

And while we dived deep into a state devoid of conversations, realization dawned upon me when we had finally arrived at a familiar intersection. The same one where the world resumed its daily life while Edward spun towards me, his eye flashed while he opened his mouth to ask a very dreaded question, haunting me for days.

"Why do you still wanna be friends with me?"

It shot through my brain like a bullet and always made me freeze like a statue, but I muttered not even a single word, let alone a sentence. Edward's deep voice was so crisp and clear, as though in reality he was asking it once again, I immediately snapped towards him. However, not once he rummaged me for answers, but instead, he was cleaning his fingernails as we waited for the traffic light.

The small bandages smothered on his hands were all I could set my attention upon, remembering he sustained them from work. Some old scars also adorned his palms, but the next thing I knew, I immediately jolted as I met with the blueness of his eye.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Oh no, I was just... thinking about those wounds you got at work..." I said. Sure it was out of nowhere, but I have to get rid of that lingering question out of my mind as best as possible.

"They're fine, it's not of concern." His response contradicted the way he instantly shoved his hands back to his pockets as he strolled past me when the lights flashed green. Him doing like that is already concerning enough.

Silently sighing, I pressed my lips and continued with a little bit of our journey until we eventually arrived at his workplace, whose building was unmistakable from every other property in the neighborhood. Edward's countenance softened as he slightly nodded his head, waving his hand and muttering his farewell, to which I returned all back with delight.

God, did it feel so satisfying accompanying and talking to him. If possible, we should be doing this everyday whenever he had the shift, so that we could finally get c—

"Wow, ain't this my sister driving her crush to work."

After Edward was gone and I jumped back to my bicycle, once again, I nearly blew off my momentum at the sudden manifestation of an entirely different voice. Without the need to guess who it was, I was already furrowing my brows at the young boy as he removed his headphones off his ears. Perhaps he was amused at the fact he almost made his sister stumble off her bike.

"Why are you here?"

"Why? Can't I be here? I was just walking around, when I saw you with your boyfriend," said Jordan nonchalantly as he shrugged.

Boyfriend?! Literally all parts of my face were consumed by fire, even my ears as well.

"H-He's not my boyfriend!" I exclaimed, stupidly stuttering in front of my brother. "He's just a friend!"

"Mhmm, sure. You were looking at him so lovingly." He quickly gagged, but his smirk grew larger than ever. Oh lord, how I wished to wipe that off his stupid face. Then he had the audacity to fling his stuff into my basket and hop onto my bike before I could even protest. "He looks like one of those cringe emo dudes."

"As if you never looked at your girl friend so lovingly either," I retorted, rolling my eyes. "Guys and girls can't be friends, right?"

I could feel him squirming in the back seat, and I immediately knew I had hit a nerve. "Surely you have a bad taste in guys, I feel bad for you."

"Sorry my preferences do not suit your high and mighty taste," I groaned.

As much as I was tempted to throw this brother of mine off my bike and leave him to go home by himself, I would not want to risk Mom chastising me over such a petty argument. Despite such a disturbance, I continued harboring solace at my rapport with Edward as I started pedaling back to the streets.