CH 87

Chapter 87 – Worry about Gains and Losses

Wei Chen had excellent character and a face that couldn’t express any emotions, which gave people the impression that he was always super calm. He remained calm even in the face of great upheavals. And in fact, Wei Chen was indeed that kind of person.

However, at this moment, a hint of embarrassment appeared in Wei Chen’s eyes. He stood naked in the bathroom, feeling somewhat awkward and not knowing what to do with his hands or feet.

He looked at Chen Li, whose gaze was clear and unwavering, and tried to say something but found himself unable to speak.

Chen Li stood at the doorway of the bathroom, continuously watching Wei Chen without blinking. Suddenly, he seemed to think of something and perhaps sensed Wei Chen’s embarrassment. Chen Li stepped back and closed the door for Wei Chen.

It was only when the door closed that Wei Chen let out a sigh of relief. He quickly rinsed himself off once more and put on clothes to cover his body. When he saw Chen Li again, Wei Chen didn’t feel as embarrassed. Originally, Wei Chen wanted to explain to Chen Li, but then he thought it was unnecessary. Even if Chen Li found out later, he would probably consider it a normal phenomenon.

Chen Li saw Wei Chen coming out and kept his gaze fixed on Wei Chen’s face, still puzzled by what he had seen earlier.

Sensing Chen Li’s confusion, Wei Chen cleared his throat and said, “You’ll know in the future.” With just this sentence, he brushed aside the matter.

Knowing that Wei Chen didn’t want to dwell on the issue, Chen Li stopped focusing on it. In an instant, Chen Li’s gaze became serious, indicating that he wanted to continue the conversation they had before Wei Chen went to take a bath.

Wei Chen sat beside Chen Li, reached out and held his hand, saying, “Li Li, I’m actually very selfish.”

Chen Li looked at Wei Chen, somewhat puzzled.

“Sometimes, I don’t actually want you to get better because I don’t want anyone else in your world. It’s a very selfish thought, and I’m aware of it. But I can’t control myself from thinking this way. So when I found out that you had the opportunity to learn painting from a world-class artist, I was happy for you, but at the same time, I didn’t want to let you go. I’m afraid, afraid that once your world has something more important, there won’t be a place for me in your heart.”

If someone had told Wei Chen before he met Chen Li that one day he would be plagued by worries and anxieties because of one person, he would have scoffed at it. Wei Chen always believed he was an extremely rational person and wouldn’t let emotions cloud his judgment. However, now Wei Chen realized how insignificant his rationality was in the face of love.

Wei Chen had these thoughts for a reason. He felt that Chen Li, at this stage, didn’t truly understand what liking or love meant. Being with him was solely due to dependency, being the first person to rescue Chen Li from the Chen family. Even the reliance on him likely stemmed from the Stockholm Syndrome, not genuine love.

So when one day Chen Li emerged from his dark world and understood what love was, would he realize that his feelings for Wei Chen were not love at all? Just dependency? In that case, what would Wei Chen mean to Chen Li?

Wei Chen’s possessiveness, bordering on obsession, stemmed from this uncertainty and fear of losing. He wanted to confine Chen Li to his own world so that, whether it was dependency or love, Chen Li would always be by his side.

Chen Li extended a hand that wasn’t held by Wei Chen and gently caressed Wei Chen’s face. He didn’t say anything, just gazed into Wei Chen’s complex eyes with his clear eyes.

Silence spoke louder than words in that moment.

Looking into Chen Li’s eyes, Wei Chen somehow felt calm. The overwhelming sense of insecurity that had been pervading his heart miraculously dissipated.

Yes, Wei Chen, when did you become so lacking in confidence? You hold the most advantageous position. Even if Chen Li doesn’t like you or love you right now, so what? In this position, don’t you have the ability to make Chen Li fall in love with you?

Wei Chen suddenly felt a sense of enlightenment, and his whole being became relaxed.

“Li Li, I really like you,” Wei Chen looked at Chen Li with deep affection and said, “So you must like me too.”

Chen Li didn’t respond, still looking at Wei Chen, reflecting nothing but Wei Chen’s image in his clear eyes.

Wei Chen embraced Chen Li, whispering softly in his ear, “Li Li, you have to like me. You must like me.”

Suddenly, Wei Chen’s pupils slightly contracted. He seemed to feel Chen Li’s gentle nod just now. The movement was subtle, but Wei Chen sensed it distinctly. In an instant, fireworks burst within his chest, vibrant and intoxicating, and he felt utterly intoxicated.

“Li Li, you promised me. You can’t go back on your word,” Wei Chen said, feeling a relaxation he had never experienced before.

Chen Li once again nodded in Wei Chen’s embrace, this time with a broader arc. Wei Chen felt it and couldn’t help but feel his heart settle into a place of tranquility.

This time, Chen Li didn’t respond further.

Wei Chen held Chen Li in his arms and knew from the steady breathing in his ears that Chen Li had fallen asleep in his embrace. He gently placed Chen Li on the bed, and as soon as Chen Li left Wei Chen’s embrace, he stirred restlessly. Chen Li reached out, grabbing Wei Chen’s hand and holding it close to his chest, gradually sinking into a deep slumber.

Wei Chen didn’t lie down; instead, he sat by the bedside, gazing at Chen Li with tender eyes, not feeling a hint of sleepiness.

Wei Chen continued to gaze at Chen Li’s sleeping face without blinking, yet he still felt unsatisfied. Unable to resist the surging emotions in his heart any longer, he lowered his head and lightly planted a kiss on Chen Li’s forehead.

As the night grew darker, the rain had cleansed the sky, and there were no more dark clouds. Stars filled the black jade-like sky, twinkling brightly and illuminating the world in their most radiant manner.

In his dream, Chen Li turned over and, unknowingly, made a smacking sound with his lips before falling back into a deep slumber.

Because of Chen Li’s movement, he released Wei Chen’s hand and lay sprawled out in the most vulnerable position, showing infinite trust in his subconsciousness.

Wei Chen picked up the comforter and covered himself, tucking in the corners. He continued to gaze at Chen Li’s sleeping face for a while before picking up his phone from the bedside table. He found the business card that Zhuge Yu had given him back in Shanghai and walked towards the balcony.

As soon as he dialed the number, Zhuge Yu answered, clearly having obtained Wei Chen’s phone number from Zhuge Feng. The moment he realized it was Wei Chen calling, he couldn’t wait to answer.

“Wei Chen, is that you?” Even before Wei Chen could speak, Zhuge Yu’s anxious voice came through.

“Mm.” Wei Chen replied coldly and indifferently.

“Have you made up your mind? If it’s a refusal, hang up the phone right now. I don’t want to hear such a cruel answer. And if it’s a positive answer, don’t say it now. Wait until I’m off the balcony. I’m afraid I might get too excited and fall off.” Once he confirmed that it was Wei Chen on the other end of the line, Zhuge Yu rambled on and made double preparations.

“I have considered it thoroughly on my end.” Wei Chen patiently waited for Zhuge Yu to finish before speaking.

A deep breath sounded from the other end of the phone. Zhuge Yu nervously held his breath, waiting for the answer.

“I have one request.” Wei Chen didn’t give an immediate answer.

“Whatever request you have, just say it. As long as it’s something I can fulfill, I will do it for you,” Zhuge Yu blurted out without even thinking.

“I want you to give Li Li a student identity so that he can attend classes freely at Q University,” Wei Chen stated.

“That’s no problem!” Zhuge Yu immediately agreed. With his position in the Q University School of Fine Arts, it wouldn’t be difficult to provide Chen Li with an opportunity to study. However, Zhuge Yu soon identified the problem. “It’s not an issue for Chen Li to choose any course he wants to take, but do you think he can attend classes by himself in his current state? After all, Chen Li can’t be without you. Without you around, can he really manage in an environment full of strangers?”

“He will adapt,” Wei Chen looked up at the night sky, his eyelids slightly lowered, his voice hoarse.

After saying those words, Wei Chen hung up the phone and quietly stood, leaning against the balcony railing with both hands.

*

On the other side, Zhuge Yu remained stunned for a while before realizing the meaning behind Wei Chen’s words. Overjoyed, he jumped up and rushed into Zhuge Feng’s room, shaking him awake from his slumber.

Zhuge Feng had just fallen asleep with great difficulty when Zhuge Yu suddenly shook him awake. Naturally, Zhuge Feng’s temper flared, and he angrily shouted at Zhuge Yu, “Zhuge Yu, are you crazy?!”

Zhuge Yu, however, had no intention of arguing with Zhuge Feng at the moment. He grabbed Zhuge Feng’s sleeves and exclaimed joyfully, “Wei Chen agreed, you know? Wei Chen agreed to let Chen Li be my student!” His face beamed with delight, resembling that of a child in their fifties or sixties.

“Fine, he agreed. Why are you so excited? Could it be that you, Zhuge Yu, won’t succeed with your apprentice for the first time?” Zhuge Feng couldn’t comprehend it. He pulled Zhuge Yu’s hand away and said, “If you’re so excited, go downstairs and run a few laps. Don’t disturb my sleep!”

After saying that, Zhuge Feng covered his head with the blanket, attempting to ignore the situation.

Zhuge Yu rolled his eyes, exited Zhuge Feng’s room, and muttered to himself, “Aren’t we brothers? Is it wrong for me to share my joy with you?”

However, a smile tugged at the corner of Zhuge Feng’s mouth. He genuinely felt happy for Zhuge Yu, as it had been a long time since he had seen Zhuge Yu so ecstatic over a student.

*

The autumn night breeze grew chilly. Wei Chen stood on the balcony, enjoying the breeze for a while, feeling his mind clear. Then he turned around and went back inside. As he passed through the living room, Wei Chen’s gaze unintentionally fell on the coffee table and remained fixed.

There were papers with writing on the coffee table, as well as a small wooden box.

Wei Chen recognized the wooden box; it was the one Chen Li had carried with him during their two relocations, treating it as a precious treasure.