twenty three

you'd think that two people who (maybe) like each other and (maybe) text all the time would make time to see each other. i'm alone.

if not for kissing, for talking.

but an entire week had passed and all I got from billie was a small greeting when she came into the shop.

didn't stop her from staring at me like she wanted to eat me though.

every time I saw her, I watch the bruises on her face disappear and some life come back into her face.

and billie loved teasing me at work.

she texts me on shift, all the time.

wearing red today?

you need to wear knee high socks more often

has anyone told you how sexy you look with your hair pushed back princess?

I thought about sneaking over to your place last night but I didn't wanna get beat up again with your grandmas cane

i've got a boner thanks to that lil skirt

im tired, come over and nap with me

what color panties today baby?

and right now, I just received: baby, I think I need medical attention, will you come nurse me again?

this girl is killing me.

k i l l i n g.

things were much easier when I hated her ass.

"annoying ass hoe" I mutter under my breath and kai attempt to pull my phone out of my hand but not before I lock it.

"keeping secrets now?"

"never"

"what's going on with you and billie?"

"beats me" I shrug and kai rolls their eyes.

I briefly told them about the kiss but I didn't mention the fact we'd kissed more than once and how much we'd actually kissed.

or the panty touching.

"she's probably got a ton of other girls so I don't wanna overthink anything"

kai shakes their head "billie works her ass off, when does she have time for another girl?"

good point.

I don't know why but I feel guilty for even joking about it.

or thinking about it.

but I have been thinking about the possibility of billie being with another woman.

and I don't like it.

"besides, she's about to text you"

my phone pings and kai smirks to themselves.

what are they up to now?

billie: we both have tomorrow off

billie: lemme take you on a date

billie: I just wanna see those red panties again

billie: please say yes, im dying to see you alone

I look up at kai "did you know about this?"

"yes, ive already spoke to your grandma and I told here we're going out tomorrow"

"I owe you"

I can't type yes fast enough.

***

the next day after work I park frankie up beside rich bitch dance studio.

well behind a dumpster to both prevent someone from seeing it and also my grandma or harry if they come past.

I slide into the passenger seat of billies challenger and sit back as she speeds off without another word.

I didn't really have much time to overthink my outfit because I knew I would be stuck at work all day.

it's not like I don't look hot as fuck everyday anyways.

it's a clear sunny day and since sitting in her car, billie hasn't said a word.

ive tucked my hands under my thighs to hide how sweaty they are.

im so nervous.

she must be nervous too because she's not her normal chatty/flirty self.

ive been trying to solve billie.

she's like a jigsaw puzzle, but all the pieces are upside down and there's only a couple in the right place.

from the direction we're headed, ive no idea what type of 'date' this is gonna be.

or how this is gonna go.

billie is wearing her usual billie attire; an oversized shirt and sweat shorts with a bunch of accessories and uptempos.

I can't stop sneaking glances at her.

her fingers are casually draped across the steering wheel and she's tapping her rings along to the beat of the music playing quietly in the background.

I can't stop staring at those fingers....the ones I wish were touching my red panties and running up my the inside of my jumper.

billie has only kissed me once, but can I die from not getting another?

because right now I feel like that's whats happening to me.

what if I like her more than she likes me?

god that thought makes me feel more queasy than I am.

what if she doesn't like me and purely wants me because of our building sexual attraction?

I just hope this date wasn't a mistake.

"since we've got a few miles ahead of us, I wanna test your music taste"

"oh lord"

she hands me her phone, tells me her password and directs me to click onto her music app which is already open on a playlist titled 'sage'

"what's all these?" I scan my eyes down all of the songs and recognise almost every single one.

"I love making playlists for everyone and every time I hear a song which reminds me of you, I add it into here"

one by one, using billies aux chord, I play each song one by one and it's...fun.

billie is singing along and im singing along and she's smiling at me and describing the reasoning for each song.

sometimes it just came on and she thought of me.

"this is going to sound weird" I turn the music down a little and billie smirks, glancing over to me. "I think we're compatible arguers"

she makes a face like she's thinking for a moment. "so what you're saying is you enjoy hating me?"

"I don't hate you, if I did, my life wold be much simpler. trust me. I just think we're good at arguing with each other"

"maybe you just have the biggest crush on me, you want me to agree with everything you think"

I snort a little too loud and cover my mouth with my hand. "I don't like you that much"

"ive been planning this date for a while, I think im the simp here"

I feel the warmth spread across my cheeks and I quickly turn my face so it seems like im looking out the window.

I shake my head a little so my face is shielded by my hair.

im embarrassed and happy at the same time when I think about billie planning this date for me.

"I honestly thought after that night when you didn't text me, you'd changed you mind about me" I don't move my gaze from the window but I know she's looking at me.

I feel her hand on my thigh, her thumb rubbing soothingly against my skin.

"id been swamped with work, I wouldn't ever intentionally ghost you baby, don't ever think that"

relief floods my veins.

"how long left?"

"about an hour, take a nap if you're sleepy princess"

are we excited for the date?

i know some of guy guys are getting impatient because they haven't figured shit out yet but i promise it's coming soon and it's gonna be SO worth it.