Chapter 42: Looking for Him

The dry forest received us in a good way. Max had insisted on moving us in one of his trucks. I would have laughed if he ran out of fuel and energy, but only if I were not about to die of pain.

He drove slowly, observing the forest. I didn't know if he was impressed by its beauty or looking for an attacker. I only remembered the forest enchanting me while Sirius looked so in tune with its wildness.

"Well, guide me," my unwanted traveling companion asked.

"Isn't it important that you're in town with everything happening?" I asked uncomfortably.

"No, my brother is also in charge."

I huffed in frustration.

"Perfect," I exclaimed sarcastically.

"So... What will be your starting point?"

"Go to his city," I barely murmured. "I want to see if his friends help me with their fine noses."

Deneb and Rigel. I hoped they could help me and not rush to kill me for letting Sirius be taken away. My hope was with them for now.

"Um, good point. Fortunately, my brother saved the route when he took his father. And this baby can handle rough terrain," he declared as he left the driveway.

Getting there would take maybe one hour or much less. I was not good at calculating time on the move. I looked out the window; my eyes lost in nothingness until a loud noise made me jump in my seat. Max had turned on the radio, putting on some music, if that could be called that.

"Come on," I demanded. "Something less noisy, please?"

He snapped his teeth and searched for something else.

I looked at myself in the rearview mirror on the side of the car. I was still a mess, but it didn't matter anymore. I laid my head on the seat and fell asleep briefly. Crying was exhausting, and I was a first-class crybaby.

"I asked my brother to reveal other recordings to see what happened," he commented, interrupting my little sleep. "Oh, sorry, I didn't realize you were sleeping..."

I leaned back in the seat after sighing.

***

"You're good?" a beautiful, deep voice asked me.

I opened my eyes and found his greens as beautiful as ever. I sighed deeply with relief.

"Bad dreams," I answered in a whisper. "You had left without me..."

"Don't be sad. It's over. It was just a dream." He caressed me. "Everything is fine. I'm here, see?"

My chest hurt, but it would pass soon. It was the aftermath of the bad dream—wow, just a horrid nightmare. I felt the brush of his lips on my cheek and smiled. Oh, how I had missed that even though I had only slept! It seemed like it had been an eternity. I straddled him, surprising him a little, but he smiled immediately—that heavenly smile. He sat down, and we were nose to nose.

But... He was gone...

I shook my head at that strange thought. Of course not. He was here. This couldn't be a hallucination. I hugged him and took a deep breath but couldn't quite detect his delicious scent. It didn't matter. He was here...

A slight jolt woke me up. I frowned, refusing to open my eyes and get out of that beautiful dream, but the noise of the truck's engine entered my ears, bringing me faster to reality. I took a deep breath and held it to stop the sharp pain that hit me.

How I hated waking up to this life that was killing me every day. Why wasn't it another one of those dreams I had?

I reluctantly opened my eyes and saw Max still with his hand on my shoulder, looking somewhat puzzled ahead. I focused my eyes and pursed my lips. We were almost there; we could see the town in the distance.

"You will have to leave your baby here," I said without grace.

"Yes. I see that I cannot pass over the crops."

Being close, he turned off the engine, and we got out. The air was fresh. The evolved people who work the lands frowned at us. I figured having two humans with weapons in front of them was bad enough.

I raised my hands, trying to make it clear that I didn't mean to hurt anyone. Max looked at me and did the same right away.

"I'm just coming to find two friends of mine," I announced shyly.

"You're the human who left here with Sirius," said the one who was closest to whom he hadn't noticed.

Hearing his name made me shudder as my heart clenched. And to think that for a moment, I hated him when I found out, terribly, his real name. I mistreated him after he lied to me. Maybe my reaction was logical, but now I wish I hadn't done it despite that. I wanted many things: to have told him what I felt before, kiss him more, hug him... love him.

I took a deep breath.

"Yes," I replied in a weak voice.

The evolved man stopped speaking and continued with his work. I was very grateful for that; I wouldn't have held it if he had asked where Sirius was. I sighed and walked, trying to beat down the pain again. Maybe they knew where he was, but I was afraid to ask and get the answer I couldn't hear.

I still wondered why I had not kissed him that day when I saw him for the first time. Why were humans so complicated? We should be like them, like each other, and get married. And although I had given him enough love in the short time I was with him, I wished I had given him much, much more...

Max was amazed as we entered the city. He pressed something on his belt, and I looked at him doubtfully.

"This can be useful," he murmured.

I hoped the evolved people didn't realize he was recording them. Maybe they'd kill us. I continued guiding him through the city. I barely remembered the route and was almost sure I was already getting lost, but I persisted. Somehow, I would find them, or they will.

We reached the main square, and I could see the white building where Sirius and I had started our union. I put my hands together and felt my ring, tightening my lips. This was all torture, but I had to keep moving forward.

"You're good?"

I nodded quickly, then hesitated for a few seconds. It didn't work to say that I was okay because I was not. I was not at all. I sighed.

"In that building," I suffered to get the words out while briefly pointing to the place. "I... married him."

"Oh," he murmured, somewhat amazed, "wow..."

I began to walk a little faster. I had located myself and remembered the route to his house because all that moment was impregnated in me. I was hoping the twins were close to his home. I never asked where they lived. I was worried to think that maybe they didn't live nearby. That would be one more complement to my decaying luck.

After a long walk, we reached the area of ​​houses where I hoped they were. Sooner than I thought, they appeared. The twins ran out of Sirius's house.

"Marien!" they both exclaimed.

They came closer and brought their foreheads to mine, one by one. Max got away a little, trying to assimilate the situation. I was static, but I smiled at the gesture of the two brothers.

"We were wondering where you were. If you were okay," one murmured with some sadness.

Oh no...

"W-where are Sirius's parents?"

They looked at each other for a second.

"Let's go inside."

They guided us.

"You see..." one began to say. "They must be kept under shelter for three days; they cannot go out."

That started to hurt me. So, they knew? Was that a custom of theirs? I just noticed a lot of things outside the house.

"After a couple of days, friends can visit the house. And..." He looked at me for a few seconds, doubting whether to speak. "The partner must remove things from the house to burn them. Although, in this case, you still didn't have a house of your own here, so..."

I clenched my fists. I was stunned to see Sirius's books and belongings thrown away like garbage. My heart was squeezing, full of anger, helplessness, and, above all, sadness.

I ran inside and saw Ursa moving the shelf.

"What are you doing?!" I complained.

One of the twins held my shoulder.

"What is that woman doing here?" the girl murmured without turning to look at me. "She's not going to do what she should."

"I didn't come to follow these customs," I muttered weakly. Sirius always told me that I should continue to be me. He didn't need me to follow his customs, and I planned to listen to him. "To begin with, you were not his wife," I said with a little more courage. "I don't want his things to move!"

"Of course. I figured you wouldn't show up to do what you had to, so I had to do it myself. His parents can do nothing but stay locked because of honor. But what do you know?!" Feeling her anger, she clenched her fist and lifted it, looking at it. "You know nothing. You never knew anything." She turned to look at me, full of rage. "You condemned him," she continued, coming toward me. "It's your fault!" I breathed heavily and cleaned the tears running down my cheeks. "You entangled him with you despite being human and having no reason to approach him. You made him betray his superior! You killed him!"

She gritted her teeth and raised her hand. My only cowardly reaction was to cover myself with my arm, expecting to receive the blow and the sharp pain of her claws cutting my skin, but nothing happened. I looked, and one of the twins had stopped her.

"What's wrong with you? You will destroy her skin," he scolded.

"It wasn't her fault," said the other. "Sirius always thought differently from us. He did all that by choice."

Max took me by the shoulders and led me back a few steps, taking me a little away from them. I shook my head and pulled out of his grasp.

"I couldn't do anything, and I'm sorry," I said through tears. "I just want to recover... his body at least, and then, if you like, you can kill me," I added, addressing Ursa.

She gritted her teeth more, closing her eyes. She made the boy release her by moving her arm abruptly and falling to her knees, covering her face. She was crying, but she was so prideful that she would never admit that she suffered and loved him too.

"Where did he take him?" one of the twins asked as he rubbed his forehead, trying to hide his sadness.

I looked at the floor, feeling guilty for having spent so many days depressed in the hospital like a possessed moron. They would have continued instead of breaking like me. I regretted every second.

Someone put his hand on my shoulder. Max was trying to cheer me up uselessly.

"Wait for us here..." Ursa murmured relatively low, her voice cracking.

"Are you going to see his mother?" asked one of the brothers with an alert expression.

"No, you fool, that will be later," she stood up. I admired her strength. She seemed more than ready to go. We will go with her."

The three of them left to pack some things, I assumed. We left the house again, and I went to sit on a nearby bench. I took a deep breath. Now, I did it very often because the pain was killing me.

"Wow, those two are twins, and their eyes are different colors... how disturbing," commented Max, sitting beside me.

"Uhm..." I replied with closed lips without the most significant interest.

"What a girl, huh? She has tremendous character."

"Maybe if Sirius had been here with them..." Tears wanted to spring from my eyes again. "He would be fine. They would have fought... Maybe."

Max put his arm around me and patted me twice on the shoulder. I needed comfort, and at the same time, I repudiated it. I just wanted to feel Sirius's arms, his warmth. Stubborn and more stubborn, I knew I wouldn't have it anymore, but I was still determined.

"Don't think about what would have happened anymore, don't torture yourself. To begin with, you are the one who has left her city to endanger and look for him. They have been here resigned."

I wiped my tears and nodded; he was partly right. The twins and Ursa were already returning.

"Easy, you look terrible," one of them muttered.

I nodded, tightening my lips in a forced, slight smile.

"We should go get my truck," Max suggested.

"And wasting time going to the south exit?" Ursa asked, annoyed as always.

Max frowned.

"Excuse me, but we'll waste more time on foot from now on."

"No, if you could run like us."

"That thing can take us even faster, so don't complain."

"Enough," I asked. "Whatever it takes to go south, we'll get it back," I added quietly.

The twins prepared to follow us. Ursa had no choice but to do so, too, albeit reluctantly. I walked with the twins at my sides. They were already with the finished appearance of an evolved. They had long since left their transition stage behind. But how I felt Ursa's hatred behind my back made me shudder... and I understood her.

"And where will we go?" asked the one on my right.

"I would like to locate Orion or one of his men."

"Then we will go to his barracks. Ursa knows where it is."

"In any case, the Orion barracks is not so far," she commented. "We could get there quickly, the three of us, without needing them..."

I turned to look at her with a frown.

"I have to go!" I exclaimed. "This is personal. I have to see his face!"

The girl was surprised at my reaction; to tell the truth, I was too. Not everything inside me was sadness. There was also anger towards those who had taken my world from me.

I continued walking.

"Don't be prideful," the one on my left demanded to the girl. "You know they would sniff us; the wind is going in their direction..."

"If we go by car, it will be a surprise for them," completed the other. "Sure, they would know something is coming, but they wouldn't know who."

That was a good point, and I hadn't thought about it, but now that they said it, it was a good impromptu plan.

We saw the truck surrounded by some evolved people looking at it curiously. Upon arrival, Ursa and the others greeted them politely. They left, and we got into the vehicle. I went to the backseat with the twins so Ursa could go ahead and guide Max. I was by the window. I needed to think and didn't want to see my face in the center rearview mirror.

We began to circle the city at full speed. First, I would try to ask whoever was there about what had happened, and if they didn't want to collaborate, I would let Max and his weapons help... Heck, I was already thinking like a soulless person deviating from my main objective: to find my Sirius.

I wouldn't lose myself or melt more in sadness until I found him. I had to be strong for him. One of the twins gave me a deposit with food, gave another to Max, and he stopped the truck to eat for a moment.

I sighed. I wasn't hungry, and if it were up to me, I wouldn't stop even for this, but we had to eat, at least they had, so I also started eating with great difficulty.

Soon after, between awake and asleep, darkness and nightmares, I saw the strange city where I had been held. It was time to surprise them.

And just as they had expected, two evolved men appeared, waiting for us as soon as we got close enough. I recognized them right away: Apus and Antares.

"What a surprise," Apus exclaimed with a severe face.

We got out of the truck. Max aimed one of his deadliest weapons at them. One that, as I recall, ripped your flesh to pieces when the bullet touched it. It was something special. Antares stared at it. He knew the weapon. Sure, being in their army or whatever, they should know. He smirked.

"What happens?" he asked. "Have you come to know how that traitor paid me for the blows he gave me?"

My heart suddenly clenched. I couldn't help but squeeze my chest.

"Shut up, you bastard. Tell me where he is!" Ursa growled, surprising us.

"What do you mean? He is no longer here..."

"You sure lie!" she cut him off roughly.

Antares shrugged, grinning sinisterly again, and fixed his gaze on me. I looked at him with hatred, and that amused him. Man, I did hate him. I couldn't bear to think that they had dared to hurt Sirius. I was tortured by the idea of ​​how much they had made him suffer just for their stupid revenge. I looked at him with more hatred.

"Girl, why are you looking at me like that? You know he asked for it." I didn't answer, and I didn't look away from him either. "You don't know how much we enjoy it," he added, his smile widening.

"Shut up." I quickly drew the weapon from my belt and aimed it at him but was surprised. Ursa and the twins had been thrown into a fight.