1 | she's only a friend.

・・・

She is only a friend.

Sitara wished she hadn't heard that. But, perhaps, it was good that she had heard it. At least, she knew now the state of affairs between herself and Agastya. 17 years of friendship were really just friendship to him.

She wasn't even a childhood friend. No. She was only a friend. The more she thought about it, the more worked up she became. Despite all her emotions that were threatening to spill out of her eyes, the rational part of her brain was functioning furiously.

She needed to distance herself. That was necessary. Any attempts to pursue the boy she loved with all her heart would only be perceived by him as clinging onto him. That wasn't what she wanted or needed. A good, healthy distance would do her a lot of good.

A distance meant no more Vadas made by Ved uncle or any more clothes shopping with Maya aunty. A distance meant no more beating Agastya's little brother, Vedant at video games. No more sleepovers.

Sitara let out a huge sigh as she stretched her arms and leaned over her desk. That really sucked. What a depressing life she was going to have to live, all because of her wretched heart. Maybe she should re-read her mom's book about heartbreak. That would serve as a perfect excuse to sit in her room and cry.

"What a depressing reality I have to live now." She mused aloud under the impression that she was completely alone.

"You're not alone in that. Life has been extra depressing now, with all this talk of boards, which is still a whole year away." Her friend, Mina had slipped into the classroom and sat in front of her, pulling out her textbooks.

"The assembly's over?"

Mina nodded. "Yeah. It was a snooze fest as usual, but the PE teacher suddenly busted a few moves when that song was playing for the assembly."

Amusement sparkled in her eyes, bringing life back into the, "I missed something important then."

"Now tell me," Mina turned to her, eager as a cat with a mouse in front of it, "how did everything go?"

"Horrible." Sitara returned to her depressed state.

"What did I miss? What went wrong?"

"He thinks of me as just a friend."

Mina covered her gaping mouth. "Did he reject you by friend-zoning you?"

"Indirectly, yes."

"Indirectly?"

"I overheard him talking to his friends. They were teasing him about how close he was with me, and in response, he said," Sitara recalled the dreaded words with a pause. "He said I was only a friend."

Mina let out a string of curses, "This is no good. Let me go beat him up."

"He's at least double your height."

"That's no problem. I can knee him in the groin more easily."

"Okay, okay. Calm down." Sitara said, gently. "It's okay. This was inevitable, anyway. It was what was going to happen from the beginning."

Mina shook her head. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have egged you on. I really thought he liked you from the way he lit up every time he saw you. Maybe I misunderstood that."

"Yeah, maybe we did. Let's just leave it at that."

"What are you going to do now?"

Sitara smiled a small, sad smile. "I will have to put some distance between us, obviously."

・・・

A second knock sounded on the door. The classroom was empty except for two kids who minded their own business, burying their noses in the class.

"Sitara, it's getting late. We need to get lunch."

Sitara protested in her calm voice, trying her best to keep it all together, "I told you I brought packed lunch. I will be eating with Mina for today."

Agastya raised an eyebrow, "And?"

"And that's it."

"The two of you can just eat at our table."

"Mina doesn't feel comfortable."

Agastya scratched the back of his neck, in confusion. He could sense that something was wrong. There was an undercurrent of something brewing between them, but what was it? He couldn't place a finger on it.

Sitara glanced at the clock, praying that Mina would get here a little later. She also prayed that Agastya left before he saw Mina.

"Girl, I couldn't get you the cream bun, but I did...get...the..." Mina trailed off as she caught sight of Agastya. It was then that she knew she had effed up.

Agasta's eyes narrowed at the bag of snacks she had with her. His eyes turned to Sitara's guilty ones.

"This is your packed lunch?"

Sitara made no reply. What was she to say anyway? That she was in love with the boy in front of her, and now she had to rid herself of the feelings so she was going to avoid him?

She'd rather jump out the window than do that.

Agastya grew more irritated with her silence. He turned around, "Fine. Do whatever you want, then."

Mina wanted to cry. Why was she always messing up things between the two of them? In all honesty, she had only meant good intentions. With a trembling voice, she said, "I'm sorry. I didn't notice him. I thought it was that dumbass class president of ours."

"You do realize that the apparent "dumbass" is right there."

Mina turned to see the class president glare at her, fixing his glasses. She turned back around. "That doesn't change the fact that he's a dumbass."

"Mina, you-"

"I'm not in the mood, Madhav. Shut it and eat your lunch."

Madhav seethed, but he quietly backed down and mumbled to himself as he ate. He knew better than to mess with the fireball Mina became when she got pissed.

Sitara pulled out her band and let her wavy hair loose before tying it into a bun. When she did that, she always felt calm and collected. Like her mother. She needed that calm now to soothe away the embarrassment. She felt bad about it, but some things had to be done.

"Give me that chip packet. I will drown my sorrows by eating to my heart's content."

・・・

a/n : sitara has the level-headedness of vineet and the gentleness of anu. i missed my babies so much. bonus: maya and ved have two children - agastya & vedant who are two years apart. agastya takes after his mom's surname while vedant takes after his dad's.