Volume 1 - CH 1.2

Part 2

Sorcerers’ Hill was just as Isuzu described. It really was themed after fairy-tales. Everything was colored in pastel, and the roller coasters and merry-go-rounds all seemed legitimate.

For starters, Isuzu brought Seiya to an attraction called ‘Doki-Doki Coaster’.

She noticed how he was dragging his feet in a reluctant manner, so she asked, “Are you scared?”

“Of course not. I just don’t think it’s designed for grown men to ride on.”

“Is that so? Then let’s ride it.”

The two sat on their seats with sullen looks on their faces, and with an awkward fanfare, the train began to move. Throughout the ride, its speed was pedestrian. There wasn’t much distance between the highest and lowest point on the track, and the sharpest turn was head-tilting at most. For an attraction of that name, it didn’t even make his heart pound once.

After getting off, Isuzu asked, “Was it fun?”

“Boring as hell.”

“I see. Let’s move on, then.”

Without delay, she walked towards another attraction.

“…”

The next place was called ‘Tiramie’s Flower Adventure’.

It was a building about the size of a school gym, with colourful drawings of grass and flowers painted on its walls. An object resembling a Pomeranian canine stood at the entrance. It must have been a likeness of the mascot Tiramie.

The attraction’s main activity involved up to 4 guests at a time moving around Tiramie’s magical garden on a gondola. And of course, it was also—

“Terrible.”

The tracks were out of alignment, resulting in a violent, bumpy ride. It was certainly more thrilling than the Doki-Doki Coaster. Seiya felt sick.

The ‘talking flowers’ in Tiramie’s garden made jittery movements, probably due to a neglected mechanical fault. Furthermore, he could not make out what they were saying due to the terrible audio quality. What was supposed to be “Welcome to Tiramie’s Flower Adventure!” sounded like “Welcome to Tiramisu Flour Venture!” Truth be told, it was as shrill as a mandrake’s shriek.

“How was it?”

“Part of me just died.”

“I see. Let’s move on.” Her reaction was as cold as ever.

“Hey. Just how long are you going to keep this up?”

“What do you mean?”

“Never mind…”

With a disappointed expression, Isuzu continued. “At any rate, I believe you’ll like that music theatre. It’s just over there.” A big signboard announced ‘Macaron’s Music Theatre’, with a drawing of a sheep-like mascot playing the violin. However, there was a ‘Closed’ sign hanging on it.

“Seriously? On a Sunday?”

“Macaron is the fairy of music. His music is superb, and he’ll only play when he feels inspired. A true artist, indeed.”

“Right…”

“Let’s go.”

A building named ‘Moffle’s Sweet House’ was across from the theatre.

Its size was similar to Tiramie’s Flower Adventure, and was decorated with a huge assortment of treats such as pancakes and whipped cream, similar to those in children’s stories.

“Welcome—” The receptionist (or “cast member”, according to Isuzu) greeted Seiya with a deadpan voice and handed a water gun to him. Upon closer inspection, though, it wasn’t a water gun, but a laser pointer shaped like a pistol. It probably emitted small laser beams upon pulling the trigger.

A large screen in the hall switched on, and displayed the instructions for the activity.

Welcome to the shop of Moffle, the fairy of sweets! Unfortunately, lots of pesky mice have overrun the whole place! Use your magical water gun and chase them away!

A set of advisories followed.

Do not look directly into the muzzle (due to the laser).

Treat the magical water gun with care (since it is fragile).

Return the gun at the exit (probably because it was expensive).

“Moffle will give a special souvenir to all who succeed. Good luck!”

It seemed simple enough. In essence, Seiya needed to shoot down the puppet mice with his laser pointer, and the number of hits determined his score. Unlike the previous attractions, this one’s a game, eh?

“Without further ado, let the battle begin!”

The double doors swung open.

It appeared that quite a bit of movement was involved in the game. It might have posed a problem if it had been crowded, but that was nothing to worry about, considering how empty it was on a Sunday.

“Off you go.”

Isuzu gave a gentle push, and Seiya stepped in.

The room was modeled after a kitchen. Replica appliances like grills, sinks and ovens were everywhere. Puppet mice were popping out at random from different places.

Fire! Seiya took aim and squeezed the trigger.

Hit…miss…miss…miss…hit again.

“They’re pretty fast…”

The puppet mice continued their assault.

Miss…miss…miss…miss…finally another hit.

“This speed is going overboard.”

“They’re moving into the storage. Don’t let your guard down.”

“Eh?”

Seiya entered the food storage compartment. Once again, the mice began popping about.

“Give me a break. There’s got to be a limit to how fast it gets, right?”

“You’re firing unnecessary shots.”

“Then what do you expect me to—”

“Unnecessary words, as well.”

Now, holographic mice were in the mix along with the puppets. They were weaving across the room, making feint actions and switching positions in rapid succession. Their actions were so swift that the average eye couldn’t keep up with them.

They ended up walking out of the ‘battleground’ without obtaining a satisfactory score.

There, the announcer spoke.

“What a pity! You tried hard, but couldn’t kill them all!”

“K-Kill? We weren’t chasing, but killing the mice…!?” What’s up with this inappropriate setting? Using words like ‘kill’ in a cheerful tea house like this causes even more shock to the customers!

Ignoring Seiya’s comments, the announcer continued, “Nonetheless, Moffle is grateful for your efforts! Please take a picture with him in the next room, okay?”

The door opened. With nothing left to do here, the two of them proceeded. After returning the gun into the box, they entered the final room.

“You can take a picture with Moffle here.”

“You mean the fairy of sweets?”

“That’s right, Amaburi’s lead mascot.”

“I’m not particularly interested in having pictures taken with people in suits.”

“Why don’t you give it a try? It’ll be fun.”

It didn’t sound like fun at all, but Seiya had no choice but to follow.

They walked through the corridor and entered a photo studio. The right half was designed exactly like the sweet house; decorated with models of doughnuts and cakes, with a standard cash register on the table. A backdrop made especially for the photo-taking with Moffle. However, the all-important mascot wasn’t there. For that matter, there was nobody in the studio at all.

“What’s the meaning of this?” Seiya asked.

“That’s because guests rarely come here,” Isuzu replied. “They’re probably resting inside.”

“…”

“Ring the bell beside the cash register. They’ll come out after hearing it.”

Seiya did as he was told. The bell gave a soft ring. They waited a while, but the mascot—did not appear. Seiya tried again. This time, it rang loudly. However, there was still no response.

“…I suppose nobody’s here. Let’s get out of here.”

“Not yet, just a little longer.”

“Why should I? There’s no need for us to wait for such an insignificant mascot in this unmotivated—”

With a clack, the door to an adjacent office opened, and the mascot in question walked out.

“Mofu.”

It was small and adorable, with its head taking up two-fifths of its height. It looked like a mouse given its rodent teeth and dark round eyes, but it had the body of a wombat, or maybe a guinea pig. Furthermore, it was wearing a chef’s hat and apron.

A pretty orthodox example of ‘cute’, he’ supposed. But that was to be expected of a theme park’s mascot.

“This is Moffle, the fairy of sweets. He’s also the lead mascot of Amaburi. 144 centimeters tall, though his weight is classified information. Runs 35 kilometers per hour at maximum threshold. Possesses talent in baking and soccer. Likes doughnuts and other sweet things. Apart from his current outfit, he also keeps a tuxedo with him.”

“You don’t have to give such a detailed explanation…”

Moffle waddled towards Seiya with light, squeaky footsteps.

“Mofu.”

“He wants to take a picture with you. Is that okay?”

“…”

Moffle nodded briefly in response.

He whipped out a smartphone from his apron, and without so much as a ‘Cheese!’, took a picture of Isuzu and Seiya, and showed it to them.

“Wait a minute, aren’t you supposed to be in the picture as well!?”

“Mofu…” Moffle knitted his brows.

“What’s with that attitude? In case you haven’t noticed, we’re your customers!”

“Kanie-kun, please calm down.”

“Save your breath. I’m not going to snap or anything.”

Despite that, this mascot was getting on Seiya’s nerves. It must have been fate, knowing they’d be sworn enemies the moment they met each other.

“I-In any case, I’m done with this place. We don’t have to take pictures with this insignificant, useless, and vulgar mascot anyway. Let’s go.” That said, Seiya turned to face the exit. At that instant—

“Mofu!”

Moffle knocked Seiya down with a hard kick in the ass.

“W-What was that for!?”

Seiya got up and turned back to confront him.

Moffle had no intention of apologizing. Instead, he made a gesture like he was spitting on the ground.

That attitude of his was messed up.

“He only did that because you were spewing unpleasant remarks about him, you know.”

“Even then, I’ve never heard of a mascot who kicks their guests!”

In addition, Moffle was now readying himself, with both arms in a boxer’s fighting stance, as if telling Seiya to “bring it on.”

“This piece of—!”

So that’s how it is, eh? Time for me to teach him some manners!

Seiya wasn’t prepared to soil his own suit just yet, but he simply couldn’t let that slide. At the very least, he wanted to land a punch on him. But at that moment—

“Mofu!”

Moffle kicked off the ground, narrowing the gap between them in an instant and landed a clean hit on Seiya with his paw.

“Ughh!!!”

A lot of force was used in that punch.

My head…is throbbing…and heavy… Those hands of his sure are something. Or paws, I mean. This simply wasn’t something a normal man dressed in a suit was capable of. So that’s what it takes to be the lead mascot in a theme park, huh?

Seiya crouched in preparation for his counter attack.

Moffle maintained his pose, with arms raised to block any punches.

“Focus…”

He wouldn’t let himself be defeated by some filthy rat. He’d lose his pride as a man otherwise. There’s got to be a weakness somewhere.

“That’s enough,” Isuzu declared, drawing her musket out of seemingly nowhere again, and pointed it at them. “Any more of this and there might be bloodshed. I won’t allow this sweet house, full of hopes and dreams, to be stained by such violence. Let’s end this here.”

“This place had ‘hopes and dreams’…?”

“Mofu…”

“If you intend to resist, I’m fine with taking both of you as my opponents.”

With that, she drew a second musket out from under her skirt, and leveled them both at their heads.

“Tch…”

So she had more than one of those things. She sounded serious as well, might as well do as she says.

Seiya took a step back. Similarly, Moffle lowered his fists (or paws, to be exact). However, he didn’t appear to be afraid of her musket, for some reason.

“So, how was it, Kanie-kun? Did you understand Moffle better by talking with your fists?”

“Not really…It was pretty one-sided, after all.”

“Have you made friends with him?”

“Hold up! Why should I make friends with that damned rat anyway?”

“Mofu.”

Moffle let out a displeased snort as well. It sounded quite realistic for a speaker that was built into a suit.

“…Anyway, we got our commemorative photograph taken, so let’s move on for now.”

“A commemorative photograph…?”

Isuzu took out her smartphone and showed it to him.

It showed a snapshot of when Moffle punched Seiya. A pathetic sight. Though it was blurred, it carried a strangely deep and profound message.

“I wouldn’t call that a commemorative photo per se…”

“Let’s go.”

Isuzu walked out of the exit and Seiya followed. Moffle spat on the floor and returned to the office.

What on earth!? That damned mascot!! Definitely not just a rat in a chef’s uniform!

“Seriously, just who is inside that suit…”

“There’s nobody inside.”

“What?”

“I’m talking about Moffle. There’s no one inside.”

“…? Ah…”

This wasn’t the first time he’d heard this. Many parents told their children that there was no actor inside a suit to avoid spoiling their fantasies. It is believed that for all theme parks, actors in suits are bound by absolute confidentiality. As such, it was taboo for to them to talk about their work, and they’d be in deep trouble if anybody found out. Therefore, it wasn’t surprising for Isuzu to be saying such things.

“Is that so? Well, I guess that’s how it is then.”

Hearing his sarcastic reply, Isuzu turned around and spoke honestly, “You don’t understand. There’s really nobody inside.”

“Okay, okay, I get it. Let’s just leave it at that.”