Chapter One Hundred and Twenty One Chapter One Hundred and Twenty One Nothing in the world could have prepared me for that news Sarah's eyes held nothing but sympathy. I should have taken the pills. Now it was too late.
I wasn't ready; I wasn't ready to train a child. Damn, I couldn't even control myself; how am I expected to raise a child?
I began panicking. "I can't-it can't be; there's too much of the line; I can't be pregnant." The words came out in a panicked whisper.
"We haven't run any tests yet; I'm only speaking based on the visible signs; we are not yet sure of anything till we run a test." She explained to me, and I nodded, but I could barely understand any word she was saying.
I paced around my room, waiting for Sarah to bring the results. She had asked me to pee in a cup for the test; I didn't even mind how awkward it was-I didn't care. Please let her be wrong. If she is wrong, I would ask her for those pills and stay regular with them.
Anytime I closed my eyes, I imagined myself getting big and round. I couldn't fight with a child in my stomach.
I could never become an Alpha.
I always thought my childish dreams were dead, but the truth was that I had only managed to lock them away at the deepest parts of my mind; that didn't mean they were all gone. I had wanted that ever since I watched the soldiers train. I was never meant to be like the other women who had to spend their lives bearing children and raising them.
Sarah walked in; from the look on her face, I could guess what she was about to say.
"I'm really pregnant, aren't I?" I asked, and she passed me the result.
"A few weeks pregnant, Luna."
"I can't..."
"There is another option."
"What option?" I asked, my eyes wide with hope.
"You can abort it. No one would have to know about it."
Abort it. Kill an innocent child. I would never do that.
"No, I can't do that. I will keep it."
Her mouth dropped open. "What? But you can't keep it... You have so much at stake; see this as a sacrifice for the greater cause."
"I will keep it." I repeated, my voice sounded bold and sure and that was surprising seeing as I felt the complete opposite. "Thank you very much for your help, you may leave Sarah."
She gave a slight bow before turning to leave. She seemed angry; I could understand her. She knew exactly what was on my mind, and she might actually believe she was trying to help me, but I would never kill my own child.
The moment she was gone, I let go of every bit of bravery I had held onto; I let the tears stream down my eyes. I didn't know how long I stayed crying, but the door opened once more, alerting me that Alexander had just returned from work. Unlike every other day, when he would walk past me like I didn't exist or I was some ghost, Chapter One Hundred and Twenty One this time he stopped right in front of me.
"Are you alright?"
Alright. Of course, I wasn't; when I thought things couldn't get any worse, they did; they got worse, life... was a disaster.
and now my "I'm pregnant."
I hadn't wanted to spill it to him just yet-I would have kept it to myself till I was ready-but I couldn't. I wasn't strong enough. I needed his support... I needed him now more than ever. But my words were met with silence.
I stared up at him, unable to read his expression.
"Say something." I said to him, on the brink of losing it, "Damn it, say something."
"Whose child is it?"
He did say something, but his words shattered me into a million pieces. Tears poured down my face as I tried to speak, but no words came.
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