chapter 42

Thulir's POV"Agathiyaa go and pick them up  from school now, I surely don't want your daughters making any drama after finding you at home when they come back."I said to him taking the dosa batter from the fridge as I knew the little bundles would be hungry "Don't you think you are being so strict with them Thulir"I glanced back at him, sitting on the sofa with his laptop, and narrowed my eyes in response to his accusation."Because you've never been strict with them not even 5% of how you have been with your brothers too so I have to do the double work here "I said and again shifted my concentration back to the task in hand started mixing the batter...Yeah I do that came out in harsh tone but I am not taking it back..."Thulir it's not like that...you know that...""You don't have to explain that phenomenon to me Agathiya, our family Traits, My ammu got that pampering her every wish is fulfilled by her father without second thought same goes for me too......If you ask me is everyone treated as same in our family I won't agree, each one have their significance and emotional attachment, Even Thalir or Umaiyazh can't and won't get the same power and authority I enjoys.....Because for my uncles I am Gowri , for my father I am his Unborn sister so they could never be harsh on me.....Malar and Alar was the first Born in the next generation and you had enough of being the strict person in the family and wanted to be your daughter's favorite and pampers them.......the problem here you have no boundary on supporting them there is no final string when it comes to them."I said as I just came back and sat beside him....he paused reading that old article regarding an old case details......Good seems like I am getting another plot I mentally noted that case name in mind will do research about that tomorrow..He shut down the laptop and turned towards me completely and took my hands into his......wait what is running in this man's mind.....I furrowed"What Happened Agathiya""Thulir........did you ever thought about another baby?"what no no no....don't Agathiya.....my irrational mind would again consider this as a better option but it's not....this will complicate things more than it already is...."Thulirrr"He called me again and his fingers pressed the back of my palm.....I looked at him who is waiting for my answer eagerly....."Why suddenly Agathiya?""I don't know........I could see the difference in our relationship may be another baby would bring us back together.....what do you think?"Hearing him I withdrew my hands from him and stood up...he held my wrist"Thulir.....please....someday we have to talk right"I shook my head in disbelief hearing his words....Taking deep breath I sat back and looked at him pointedly....He signed up for this "What made you think having another baby would solve the issue between us Agathiya?.....I don't know how you came up with this idea but I surely don't want to give you another reason for you to blame everything on me for every single time......I am already done with that not anymore ""Is that what you think about our daughters Thulir........a mere reason I want to blame you nothing more?"His tone raised.....it's not like only his temper was raising at the moment "Do you really want me to say Agathiya?""Just say it.....lets finish it off today"He said.....I withdrew my hand from his hold and spoke "They are my daughters I gave birth to them and I do love them but at times you make me feel that I am just the caretaker for them and they are child and they would learn from what they see.......Malar saying me that "I know nothing and only use for household works" and do you know where that came from........YOUAnd I can't simply come across those hard words.....You literally forgets my existence at times and your world revolves around your daughters and work mostly........that makes me feel useless in your life.....I am tired of being your representative at home because you always busy with your profession, i have to face the people who keep on asking where is your husband didn't he came......No matter how much I tried to ignore others words what about our own family members Agathiya.....I don't want the kids have no emotional bond with their Perippa....If you want me to list out other....the list would never end today Agathiya......About having another baby, I have no problem but if at all I get pregnant again I would like to go back to Revathi Illam, I don't want to be here alone...away from my family.......I want the next baby at least grow with the family and his or her cousin just like how my childhood have been....anyway most of the time you would forget me and only wants to see your daughters you can come and see them in week ends...so this won't affect you at all and I can join back in the university there....If I became pregnant again I want all those happen Agathiya....is that okay with you? Because now I am not ready to sacrifice me or my baby's upbringing just for you to follow your profession or should I say passion.....because financially there is no problem for us you are in the department because you loves it...You don't have to make any sacrifice for that Agathiya but I had to and I did...A baby can never solve a marital problems ever Agathiya.....because having a baby comes with its own set of responsibilities if the couple already  have issues between them the baby will add up more and that would become a toxic environment for the baby...."I stopped when I heard the alarm going off in my phone....reminding me it's time to pick them up...I took a deep breath and moved towards the table and took my phone and offed the alarm"It's time please go and pick them up "Author's Note Thank you ❤️❤️❤️❤️