LIII

LIII

January

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February

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I thought I could live away from him. I thought I was strong enough to have another life without him. I thought memories were adequate for me. However, I was not right. It seemed like I was having a nightmare for the past two months since I left the palace.

I never went out of the room and just stayed on my bed like an insane person staring at the blank space. Should I consider myself crazy? Probably, yes, because I wanted to run to England and hug him. I missed him so much that it exploded my heart every second passed by.

Atlanta was a nice place because of low temperature despite of the start of summer. The air was fresh because of the green surroundings in the city. But, I could not appreciate it.

When I had returned last December, I did not have extra money to continue to pay for that house my family had lived for a while or at least rent a small apartment like we had before. I was grateful that Lola was a real best friend to me. She helped my family and me to have a roof and other necessities.

She brought us to Atlanta where she was living with her boyfriend, Cricket. He had a small mansion near the farm, which he received as a birthday present from his parents. The little mansion had masters and four bedrooms. At first, I wanted to reject Lola's offer living with them, but Cricket and her both insisted. He was a good guy. Now, I knew why Lola chose him over her ex-boyfriend.

I promised them that I would work once I got myself again. But, they both said that I should take my time. At the present, they all knew, including my family, about the happenings when I was still in England. I told them last month, and my mom apologized to me for what she had told me on our phone call when I was still in England.

The sun was already on its highest position when Lola visited me to my room. She always was checking me, especially on weekends when she had her day off. My little sisters, Elena and Hana, stayed in my room on their free time. Sometimes, they were with Chance. My parents went here occasionally. My dad had started his small business in the market with mom after permitted by his doctor to work again. They got a good place because of the help of Cricket's father. He was the mayor of Atlanta.

Lola put down the tray of lunch in front of me and sat on the edge of my bed. She crossed her arms on her chest and said, "Eat first. I think we have a long talk today."

Usually, pasta would make my mouth watered, but not now. I wanted to throw up once its smell entered my nose. I did not feel well when I woke up this morning. Actually, it happened daily this month. It might be because of the weather.

I pushed the tray away from me and covered my nose with my hand. "I can't eat," I uttered and stood immediately. Holding my stomach, I went to the rest room inside my room and kneeled beside the toilet bowl. I puked all I ate last night. The world spun.

"Shirley, are you alright?" I heard Lola behind me while tapping my back. "Ugh, that's the effect of staying in your room twenty-four seven. You should live a life," she said in irritation.

My best friend was annoyed not because of my disgustingly vomiting, but because I was stubborn. I was not the Shirley she knew long time ago. Even me, I could not recognize myself anymore.

She got tissue papers to help me cleaning up and the looks on her face told me that she was worried. I never went out of this room and the more I kept myself here, the more I could not recover. There were nights that I had delusion. I saw him standing near the window and sitting on the mini sofa. Who would not worry for me?

Lola supported my walk until we reached my bed and sat side by side. She held my right hand, which felt empty because of the missing ring. The ring Alexander had given to me that night in Bel Canto, but I also left it to him the night I walked away from him.

"Shirley, what are you doing to your body?" I saw tears filled her eyes when she faced me, "If you continue what you're doing, you'll die like that. I don't know if I can allow you."

"Lola," I breathed her name, almost inaudible.

She blinked before speaking, "You know I want to apologize to what happen. It's all my fault, Shirley. If I did not give you that job offer, maybe, you're fine right now. We're still eating in an old restaurant, walking under the sun during summer or laughing in a park." She inhaled, "I'll give anything, just to return the time and make things right."

I put my arms around her and shook my head, "Lola, please don't feel sorry. It's my choice. No one wants this to happen except me."

We were hugging each other for a few moments. I was glad that I had a best friend like her. Otherwise, I was already gone.

She detached her body from me and brushed the tears on her cheek. "Shirley, you'll be okay, right? If not, I'm going to live regretting what happened to you," she uttered, preventing herself to cry.

I nodded and gave her assuring smile. I knew that I was going to be fine, but I did not know when it was. Not now. Not tomorrow. Not soon. But, I would try to be fine for the people who loved me most: my family and Lola. They would be the only reason I was still breathing.

"Okay," Lola stood and got the tray she brought earlier, "You should eat now, Shirley Woodman, or you will vomit and become woozy again. Just choose one."

I scrunched my nose and put a finger on my nostrils. Pasta filled me with nausea.

"Can you give me a different dish?" I did not stop from throwing up again so I run faster to the toilet to take everything out.

I saw Lola in the corner of my eye watching me while her hands were on her hips and she was leaning on the counter. She wanted to question me, but she waited for me to remove all in my stomach.

"What is with you, Shirley?" She asked while helping me cleaning for the second time this noon.

"I don't know. Possibly, stress," I was too sensitive in scent these past weeks. There was one time when Hana visited me wearing my favorite cologne that made me irritated. I remembered my mom gave me lemons last week, which I did not like before, but it made my saliva overflowed and I really liked the odor.

Now I believed that depression made someone weird.

"You're the number one fan of pasta as far as I know, but why are you..." she trailed off as if someone whispered the answer, "Oh wait, when is your last period?"

"Period?" I was not in the right mind to understand her.

"Oh my gosh, period, menstruation," she exaggerated her hand gestures. "Are you really a girl?" She whispered that still got my ears.

Something clicked in my brain like a switch. I could not recall when my last red days were, but I was sure that my sanitary napkins were still complete ever since we transferred in this house in the end of last year.

"December? I'm not sure," I told her honestly.

She fanned herself, "Just wait here. I'm going to get PT in my room."

She left me dumbfounded. PT? What was that? It was my first time to hear it. I sat on the toilet after putting down the lid.

She went back instantly giving me three pieces of white small rectangular object that had small monitor-alike on the middle. I looked at it like a baby seeing a TV for the very first time.

"Those are pregnancy tests or PT for short," she answered my unspoken question, "Use all of them to make sure."

I looked at her, shocked, "Do you think I'm pregnant?"

"Let's see," she shrugged and turned her back to me. She instructed me how to use these objects before closing the door. I heard her from the outside, "If it's positive, it means I'm going to be an aunt of two-month old fetus. In seven months," the excitement on her voice made me jump, "You'll have a cute baby. I hope she looks like you."

After a century, I opened the door for Lola who smiled brightly. I pointed the three PTs on the counter, and she immediately went there to see.

I followed her to know what the result would be. I did not have any freaking idea on how to read that thing. She immediately faced me with her grin and hugged me.

"Oh my gosh! Congratulations! You're pregnant!" She yelled on my ears.

I looked at the PTs on the counter and saw two lines on each small screen. Therefore, this was the fruit of our short love story.

She held my shoulder and frowned when I sobbed. "Hey, Shirley, you should be happy because you're going to be a mother soon," she tapped my arms.

"I'm bearing his child, Lola," tears fell down one by one, "What if I cannot give this child a good future and someday when Alexander learned about our child, he will get my child from me. I'm scared, Lola."

Instead of encouraging me, she slapped me hard on my cheek. I stared at her, stunned. I held both my face and stomach.

"Are you going to ask me what that is for?" She gave me glares, "Shirley that is for you being weak! You're not like that before you met that stupid prince. I hate him before but I hate him more now because of what he did to you. You should have a life, Shirley, without him. Especially now, there is a living baby inside your tummy."

I brushed my wet cheeks and nodded, "I'm weak because I can't move on."

"You should move on for your child, Shirley," she calmly stated and moved closer to me, "Your child needs you. Your parents, siblings and I are here for you and your child. You don't need anyone because we're here for you. You can recover in this nightmare, Shirley, and you'll have a better life with your child."

I gazed at my stomach, which was still flat even though there was already a small body forming there. Suddenly, I felt excited and anxious at the same time. However, I would do my best to give this little prince or princess a good life despite of being away from his or her father. He or she would be the only evidence that once upon my life, I fell in love with a prince, whose name was Prince Alexander.

(A/N: MUST READ! Thank you for reading! Wow the previous chapter was so intense for all of us! I saw all your comments. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Since, we are nearing the end of Her Life with the Prince, I'm planning to post Prince Alexander's POV of some chapters in the end of this story. Do you have any chapter request to know the point of view of our Prince Alexander? Free to choose from chapter one to the end. Just comment it. But, it is only limited to 10 chapters. So, if ever there are a lot of requests, I'm going to choose the most requested chapters. Thank you so much for stopping by. Have a nice day. See you on next chapter.)