Between Desire and Denial: Chapter 30

“You really getting a migraine?” I asked her, immediately concerned that the birth control change hadn’t worked.

“No.” She shook her head quickly. “It was just a way to get out of there.”

“So, you didn’t want to catch up with—” I stopped my question as we walked across the street to our house, and instead we both stared at the large box in front of our door.

“I think that’s our mattress.”

I sucked on my teeth before nodding, not wanting to think about having her sleep on it upstairs tonight or any other night. “I’ll bring it in tomorrow morning.”

She shook her head and I saw how her walls were being built right back up again. I knew we’d torn down a barrier between us in the woods but this mattress was going to ruin everything. And then she said, “We should get it in tonight. I can help you after I change.”

I sighed. “No. I’m fine bringing it in myself, Olive.”

“Whatever.” She waved off my offer. “I can carry one side and you the other. It’ll be easier with two people, and I should open it so it can air out. The foam ones normally smell a bit weird for a few days.”

I knew my jaw was clenching up and down. “Go change, Olive. I’ll get this up there myself.”

“But—” I lifted the box and her jaw dropped at how easy it was for me. “Okay show-off. I guess it’s easy for you to carry it all by your freaking self,” she grumbled as she threw the door open and held it for me.

I stomped up every one of those stairs, pissed that there would be no reason to keep her in the primary suite with me now.

“Go shower, Olive,” I told her again as I heard her creeping up the stairs. “I’ll set this up.”

She sighed and stared at the box like she didn’t exactly enjoy the idea of it, but then she nodded and disappeared down the hall. It didn’t take her long to rinse off or me to pull apart the cardboard box and rip open the plastic to find the mattress practically unfolded itself as it absorbed air.

I came down the stairs with the garbage and said, “You’re right. It’s going to take a few days to air out. No one will sleep up there tonight.”

She narrowed her eyes while combing a hand through her wet hair. “Dimitri, if this is—’

“By the way, what the hell were you and Jameson discussing at Lucille’s?”

“Oh, um, nothing.” As always, she jumped right in with her answer when she lied.

So, it was obvious their conversation was intimate. “You expect me to leave that alone after you got jealous of Melly?”

“It wasn’t jealousy. It was …” She drifted off with her explanation and looked away from me.

“What?”

“I don’t know. Insecurity? A feeling of no self-worth, probably?” Then she winced as she let her feelings show. “Okay, maybe a little jealousy.”

“So you don’t want to tell me what you and Jameson discussed?”

She shook her head no and stretched her arms above her head. Then, she rubbed her own shoulders. “Maybe later. I’m pretty tired.”

I stepped in and rubbed them for her. “It’s okay if you don’t want to tell me.” It absolutely wasn’t. I was honestly considering firing up all the security I’d installed throughout this community but hadn’t turned on because of the HOA’s holdup on the approval. I could have seen why she went into Lucille’s and how close she and Jameson had been standing.

My investment in Paradise Grove was going to shit already, but I wasn’t about to lose the one thing I wanted most in it. And after her meeting with Jameson, suddenly, she was a closed book when I wanted her fucking open. I couldn’t figure it out. She had been completely willing in the woods, like she wanted something more with me and now I was going to pry information from her.

“There’s nothing between us, Dimitri. He doesn’t want me the way Melly wants you.”

“I don’t believe that for a second. There’d be something between you two if he could have it that way, Honeybee.”

She looked up at me with those beautiful eyes and smiled softly. “I don’t think so. If it makes you feel better, I thought I heard him talking about something, so I was eavesdropping. He just wanted to know what I’d heard.”

“You were spying on them?”

“Well …” She shrugged and hummed as I kneaded her shoulders a bit more before I pushed my fingertips into her curls so I could massage her scalp too. “It wasn’t really spying. Just listening closely.” She had no boundaries. “Plus, what if I heard something about the board? It would have helped us.”

I shook my head at her. “Don’t go snooping around while I’m gone,” I frowned, thinking back to Jameson’s stare tonight. “Jameson didn’t look happy about you listening.”

She chuckled but I saw how she glanced away.

She wasn’t telling me something and that thought infuriated me. Sometimes I could swear she was more reckless with that curiosity than I was with the risks I took in my business.

I tried to give her space as I made calls that night and did things I shouldn’t have done. I wasn’t going to leave Olive unprotected. I showered in the upstairs bathroom and toweled off before going to the primary suite with the towel wrapped around my waist. She’d already gotten into bed and had the light on her nightstand turned off.

She texted away on her phone though. For some reason, after what we’d done in the woods, I wanted all her attention. “Who are you texting?”

She looked over her shoulder at me as I laid down with my head right beside hers. She didn’t say anything for a second as I scooted close. “You’re lying up here again?” she whispered, her tone a bit breathless.

I love that I affected her in the same way she affected me. “I won’t have you in my bed for a while. You think I’m going to pass on sleeping up against your ass on my last night?”

“How romantic.” She chuckled as I yanked her close to me.

She turned her phone off right away. “Who’s got your attention over me?”

She hesitated for a second before she said, “No one.”

“Mr. Perfect?” I lifted a brow. “You texting men on that dating app while you’re dating me for real now?”

“Um, we sure that’s happening? What you said in the woods doesn’t have to be serious. We can go back to—”

“I was serious. Better tell that guy so. Or you plan on meeting him while we date?”

“I don’t know.” I felt her shrug and then she admitted, “I’ve never casually dated before. Rufford and I got serious fast. I don’t know if someone is going to be okay with me sharing a bed with another man.”

“Another man who happens to be your boyfriend.” I slid my hand into her shorts. “And happens to know how to play with your pussy just right.”

“Dimitri—” She sighed but her legs opened immediately for me to touch her clit before sliding into her pussy.

“Damn, you’re already wet for me. You can go ahead and tell Mr. Perfect our relationship is exclusive.”

“I shouldn’t. We should just see where this goes, Dimitri. It’s too new,” she clarified but her voice was climbing higher as I worked her. “If you go out with someone and it works better with them, we can stop.”

“Want me to stop now?” I asked as I thrust a finger in her and curled it.

“No.” She responded immediately. Her small fingers wrapped around my wrist as her hips moved back and forth to the rhythm of me finger fucking her. “Don’t stop. I want this. I just also want our relationship to not be complicated. If we start going on dates with others, we’ll stop.”

“I wouldn’t stop this ever, Honeybee.”

She moaned my name and my dick hardened.

“I’m never going to stop trying to have you when I get to hear you moaning my name. You think you would stop this?” I whispered as I nudged my cock into her ass while pushing my thumb into her clit. “It seems this casual relationship is working out pretty good for you.”

She mewled as I pinched her clit and then she rolled her ass harder into my cock. “It is. It’s so good,” she murmured.

“What is? That I fuck you better than any man you’ve been with?”

“Yes.” She rode my hand in her shorts faster, but I wanted her to realize I would give her more than she ever could get from someone else. I slid my other hand down her ass cheek and let my thumb graze over her other hole.

Her whole body quivered as she gasped, “What are you doing, Dimitri?”

Her voice was unsure, but I knew right then, no man had ever fucked her there. I knew right at that moment, too, that no other man ever would but me.

“I’m giving you an orgasm before I leave,” I said against her neck.

“But I’ve never … No one’s ever done anything to me there.”

Hearing her admit it had me pulling my cock out from my shorts and nudging it against her right there. I wanted to feel it pucker on my tip, so tight and soft at the same time.

“Well, if you’re going to start fucking around with other men, you’d better know what you like beforehand, right?” I’d never let another man touch her. “I’m your boyfriend. I’m the one who takes care of every part of you now. And I’m going to show you, Honeybee, just what you like.” She’d like only me. My cock inside her. Where I belonged.

“I want you again, Dimitri. Get a condom this time.”

I listened to her right then, but I wasn’t sure I always would.