Broken

She stared at the wood panelled ceiling. Once again she counted from one to one hundred, then started again.

"Count sheep," her father would tell her as a child, "that'll help you sleep".

"Or just make me hungry." She'd always reply.

Sadness clawed at her heart, so she rolled over onto her side and glared out of the window.

After their little 'moment, or 'accident' as she kept telling herself, Jake had insisted that she should rest whilst his wolves went to investigate the outsiders that had been spotted.

Evening had quickly turned to night and there had been no word.

Cassidy sighed deeply as once again the front door opened and somebody new walked in. She had been listening to the sound of Jake pacing backwards and forwards, her breath hitching in her throat every time he neared the stairs.

Her wolf was restless knowing there was danger nearby, but she was going crazy about the fact that there was a strong, safe, male wolf just a few feet away. Her wolf could not understand why Cassidy hadn't wrapped herself around him like a boa constrictor and never let go - in her weaker moments, nor could Cassidy.

Yet with each thought of lust, a dose of reality would be delivered as yet again the front door would open, the pacing would stop, and there would be a brief, penniless exchange. "No word yet, Alpha."

Quite how long it took them to find four wolves, Cassidy wasn't sure. If it was Caine or people from his pack, which strangely Cassidy didn't think it was, then they normally weren't skilled enough to have hidden this many wolves, for this long. Only skilled, well-trained wolves would be able to avoid detection for this long, which eased the guilt that had been weighing on Cassidy since earlier.

A pang of worry occasionally echoed through her hollow chest as she thought about her girls, somewhere out there in the wilderness, searching for her. What would happen if the male wolves found them first?

She shuddered, unwilling to focus on the dark thoughts and instead returned her mind to Jake, and the relative safety he seemed to promise her battle-scarred wolf.

No, for the first time in a long time, Cassidy felt....safe - and that scared the shit out of her. She should never have kissed him, she should have kept her distance. She had no intention of taking a mate, not that her wolf was in full agreement with that, but even her wolf knew that she had other priorities - they'd both lived through too much to then throw everything away for a handsome alpha wolf.

"Liam." The name had her silently leaping from her bed and slowly opening the bedroom door. She listened as the Alpha and his beta exchanged general updates on the search, it seemed they still hadn't found anything.

Cassidy sighed and cursed silently, she was about to go back into her room, when Liam's tone changed and she paused, knowing that evesdroppers never liked what they heard, but risking it anyway.

"She needs to leave."

"No."

"Jake!"

"Alpha." Jake corrected, his tone tight, his voice strained.

"Alpha, she needs to go. She's endangering the pack."

Jake growled, "no."

"Why won't you listen to reason? Even she knows she should go! What is it about this she-wolf that makes you unable to let her go? Do you even know why you can't let her leave?"

"I-. I-."

"Didn't think so. I can't work out if you're horny or trying to save a ghost."

"Watch it, Liam."

"Hit a nerve did I? Sounds about right. You won't let her leave because she reminds you of-"

"Don't. Say. Her. Name."

"Jake-"

"Alpha" Jake corrected again, "Listen, Liam, I say she's not leaving until she's 100% better, that's the end of it."

"Elenor was right." He mumbled.

"What did you just say?"

He hesitated, but when he spoke a steely resolve entered his voice. "I said, Elenor was right. She's rounding up wolves and trying to get them to agree to a pack vote, like they used to have, to get rid of the she-wolf."

The growl reverberated up through the floorboards, Jake's snarl, unmistakable. "Watch your step, Liam."

"So now you'll attack me? Choose that she-bitch over me?" Liam sneered. "Where do you see this ending, Jake? You and I both know that you cannot mate outside of the pack, which means that she is nothing more than a distraction." Jake's growl seemed to reverberate up through the house, vibrating through Cassidy's chest. "I can't understand why you don't see the similarity to your mother in this situation? I will not be the one to watch you do the same damage to this pack as your father did."

"That was different." Jake snapped, Cassidy's wolf pushing her to go to him, to comfort him. "That was a lone wolf with a troubled, dangerous past and we didn't realise. He was practically a rogue. She's no rogue, she's an alpha of a pack!" Cassidy's wolf growled in response to the wave of power that washed over her as Jake finished on a growl.

"Maybe you can't see beyond the golden halo that you've given her, but that she-wolf is more lone than most. She claims to have a pack, but how do we know? And she's had more of a 'troubled past' than most. You thought we were all staring because she was naked earlier, in the woods when she tried to escape? Thought we were staring because she's pretty? I was trying to count the scars." Cassidy flinched, her body stilling at the hate and distrust in Liam's tone. Under Jake's gaze she'd nearly forgotten about those damn scars. Nearly. She never said she'd had an easy ride.

"That women is more scar than skin at this point. I'd say she's been through hell and back, which is exactly what makes her so damn dangerous. To us, and to you. Of all people, I thought you'd get this Jake, outsider wolves are not welcome. It's not a pack rule for the fun of it, it's about survival. That she-bitch is going to ruin us all."

Jake snarled, "if you call that she-ALPHA, a bitch one more time, Liam. I'll-"

"You'll what? Banish me? Demote me? You know what, no need to bother. I will always have your back, brother, but I cannot back this. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I actually agree with Elenor on this one. The she-bitch has to go, or you do."

Cassidy's wolf lunged to the surface with such force, that she barely managed to stop the transformation, hands changing to claws that dug into the wall. The challenge in Liam's voice shot down Cassidy's spine, her wolf unhappy at how disrespectful he was being.

"Liam. You are my best friend, you have been there for me throughout my life. In my darkest moments, you have helped me survive and become a better man, a better Alpha. I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that without you, I would not be here. You know how badly I coped after taking over as Alpha. You, more than anybody on this planet, know exactly how dark I got. But I swear by the moon, brother..." Jake spat, "if you refer to Cassidy as a bitch, one more time, I will squeeze the life from you."

Cassidy's heart stilled at Jake's protection of her. Had she even earned such a strong reaction from him? This was all her fault, she should never have come here. She needed to leave, find her pack and get out, but she couldn't do that until she was sure that the intruders weren't her fault.

"I lost you once in the darkness, Jake. I will not do it again." Liam whispered and with that, he turned and left.

Cassidy rocked back on her heels. Guilt, pin pricking in her chest, she was tearing this pack apart. Vowing to keep distance between herself and Jake, promising the night that she wouldn't ruin his pack, she stood up and turned to go back to bed.

Under her right foot, the floorboard creaked. Her breath caught in her throat as the sounds of Jake's movement below fell into silence.

She spared a look over her shoulder, her eyes travelling down the length of the long staircase, taking their time and highlighting every little detail, as though they knew what waited for them.

Golden orbs, filled with so much pain that it made her knees buckle, glowed as they watched her. Jake's left foot was on the bottom step, his hand on the bannister. Had he been on his way to see her?

Every fibre of being in her body longed to go to Jake, to soothe him and his wolf and to tell him that it'd be ok, Liam would come around eventually, but recalling her promise from only moments earlier, she forced herself to turn away and head into her bedroom.

As the door clicked shut, a harsh sound in the soft silence, Cassidy heard Jake venture outside. No doubt he'd transformed into his wolf and gone for a run. Her wolf begged her to go with him, trying its hardest to lunge to the surface and to ease the Alpha.

Ignoring her internal battle, Cassidy flopped onto the bed and groaned into the pillow. As silence settled once again, it was broken by a gut-wrenching howl from the Alpha of a broken pack.

"This is all my fault." She whispered to the silent room.

++++

Authors Note:

Hello There,

Thank you for reading!

So, I tried to update this yesterday, but Wattpad was misbehaving at a whole new level, so, unfortunately, it had to wait until today.

Anyway, just wanted to say - thank you so much for reading, voting, adding to your reading lists etc. I adore the people who have commented - I love reading your comments, more than you will ever know!

There will be more next week - have a great weekend everyone.

Also - next chapter.....how about we meet Cassidy's pack? You're gonna love them, they're awesome.

V_F <3