Significance - Chapter Thirty One

I felt my eyebrows rise and I stared at him. He stared back with a little smile.

I don't understand. We're just reading each other's thoughts, right?

No, I told you it's different. It's like we can feel each other, though we're not touching. You can feel every emotion, every feeling of the other person all over you. It's all consuming and intense and can be very...sexual. It's Ace non-sex. They call it mutuality.

But Gran said that Ace's get pregnant the human way, so you have regular sex, right?

We do, after the wedding, but mutuality is different, we don't need to wait.

After the wedding?

Yeah. We wait until our wedding to...consummate. He had a little grin. Just like you want to. My mouth opened for a second before I remembered that I didn't have to tell him things anymore. But remember that most people only wait a couple weeks to get married so it's not that big of a stretch.

But you do both...sex and mutuality once you're married?

Yes, and when you do them together...it's supposed to be insane. Like uncontrollable, really powerful...pleasure.

I was blushing just talking about it, let alone doing it.

I'm not pressuring you. He smiled and ran a finger over the length of my jaw and chin. I'm just letting you know that if we get all entangled in each other's minds, our bodies will go that direction. It's instinct. It's not sex, it's all in the mind but it's definitely sexual. And I was just joking about waiting until we get to the house. We'll wait as long as you need to, no rushing.

He smiled reassuringly but I'd already seen in his mind how excited he was about it. It's one of those things you have to wait until you're ascended to do, like a lot of other things. He asked his dad about it since we had imprinted. He knew real sex was out of the question for a long while and I was grateful for that but he was very intrigued and interested in the other, the mutuality.

You don't want to wait...to do that? I asked.

He smiled and rubbed the back of his neck. I could feel his embarrassment and caution. No. He didn't need nor want to wait but he did and would if I wanted to.

Baby, listen. Even though the fasten seat belt sign came on he leaned over in his seat towards me and put his head to mine. I did used to think that all this was a sham, that everything my parents used to talk about was over exaggerated and more about personal perception than facts. Then it happened to me - you happened to me - and even though I used to act all aloof about it, I had waited for that day my entire life. When it happens to other Aces, they jump right in to being together and starting their lives. It's instinct, I know you feel it, too. But...with us being so young, especially you - He continued quick when I mentally rolled my eyes - we need to keep it toned down and not just jump in all at once, like our bodies want us to. But. I have wanted all of you, all of us, since that first second. It's drilled in my bones from the imprint to... I don't want to scare you.

He shook his head and started to move back, but I stopped him by grabbing his shirt sleeve.

"You'd never hurt me, I know that. I'm not scared of you or anything you have to say. Tell me," I pleaded and he sighed, then continued.

It's rooted in my blood to consume you and be consumed by you. To protect you. To please you, in every way. His fingers raked through my hair. To make you shiver when I touch you. And to his enjoyment, I shook with goose bumps. He smiled and skimmed his fingers down my arm. To cause your heart to beat faster. He tapped his finger over my heart as he'd done once before and it didn't make me calm down any more than it had before. To make you happy, to do anything and everything with you, to date you, spoil you, love you...marry you. So yes, I want to make love to you. I want to mutualize with you. I want to live with you. I want to marry you and have kids with you. But not today. Not right this second. We have all the time in the world, Maggie. I told you in the very beginning that I'll let you set the pace and that still stands. I'm ready for anything, whenever you are but I'm not pushing you, ok? I've waited this long for you and I'm happy. He kissed my stunned lips softly as I fought to keep my composure and breaths even. I'm happy, just like this, for now.

I had no idea what to say to him after that. My chest was too shallow and my eyes were brimmed with tears, but I wasn't sure what they were for, happiness, gratefulness or fright. My vision was spotty and blurry and Caleb's breath blowing in my face wasn't helping anything. He smiled cockily and brushed my bottom lip with his thumb.

"Breathe, Maggie."

I took a deep breath and felt more clear just as the captain came over the intercom and instructed us we were about to take off. I felt the floor and seat vibrate and shake beneath me. I gripped his hand on the armrest between us and gasped at the jolt as the engines fired.

"It's ok, it's normal," he said as he turned his hand over under mine to lock our fingers.

I took deep breaths and scoffed at myself. I was not scared of a plane. I leaned back and tightened my seatbelt as tight as it would go. I felt Caleb's eyes on me in concern.

"I'm fine."

"Let me distract you," he said and pulled my face to his. Our noses touched and he sighed his words. "I can't wait for us to get there."

He showed me a vision of us on the beach, walking and holding hands, him chasing me down the shore as we passed a campfire at nighttime. Him kissing me on a big porch swing as he pressed me down further into it's big cushions and pillows. A huge white breakfast nook window sill where we're sitting, reading a book together and eating orange slices. My legs wrapped around him as we float in the pool and he kisses me witless.

When he pulled his face away I was breathless, but the plane was long forgotten.

"Is that your plans for me?" I joked.

"Absolutely." He smiled, his dimple driving me insane and tweaked my nose. "We're ten thousand feet. How do you feel?"

"Perfect. Thank you."

"Well, we can sleep. We've got a long flight but we'll get there really late and it takes about an hour to drive to the house, so."

"Ok. Hey," I grabbed his arm, "thank you."

"For what?"

"Everything. Dealing with my ex, my brother, my dad. My insecurities about all of this, coming to find me, taking me away from everything, explaining things to me a hundred times, keeping me calm on the plane, being patient with me. For always telling me the truth even if it embarrasses you or you think I won't like it."

"You never have to thank me for those things," he said sweetly, but forcefully, and wrapped a hand around the back of my neck, his fingers curling and flexing as he spoke. "You're mine now, Maggie. You'll always come first and I'll do anything for you. Anything."

"I know. And I love you for it."

"I love you, too, baby. I don't see how I can love you anymore than I do right now."

I smiled at his words, feeling the warmth and caress behind them. I leaned forward and kissed him. I opened my mouth and let my tongue touch his bottom lip, then pulled it gently between my teeth. His breath left in a rush. I smiled inside and pulled him closer with his shirt in my fist. I let my fingers trace his jaw and neck and move to his hair. I ran my fingers through it, tugging gently. I heard and felt his small groan so I decided to pull back from him. His eyes were bright and glimmering with something I didn't want to think about on a plane. He licked his bottom lip and continued to breathe erratically.

Just so you know, it makes me insane when you call me baby.

"I'll remember that," he said breathlessly.

I giggled. "It's good to know I'm still not the only one affected."

"I told you, it's so much worse for me." He leaned forward, so close our faces were almost touching. "That wasn't nice. I can't exactly do anything about it on a plane, now can I?" He nipped my chin and then kissed the same spot. I gulped and he smiled. "Now we're even."

I laughed breathlessly and bit my lip. His smile was smug as he brought his hand to cup my cheek. Then his fingers coasted down my arm to my hip and I sucked in a breath as he found my thigh then my leg...as he pulled a pillow out from under my seat. Oh, boy. Caleb was going to play dirty. The plane's air didn't seem to be working properly.

He chuckled at my thoughts as he fixed the pillow for me under my head, leaning my seat back.

"Touché," I muttered and he laughed harder.

"There will be plenty of time for that later," he assured amusedly.

"So, what's this tattoo on your wrist?" I rubbed it with my fingers. "I've seen them on your family, too."

"It's our Virtuoso crest for the Jacobson clan. Every family has their own crest. Ours is half moon, simple and classy. We're born with them and only other Aces can see them. It's one more way to show others who we are, what Clan we belong to."

"But I've seen names on the other ones. Their significant's names."

"Yeah," he murmured and sucked his lip in and out which I'd learned was a thinking tactic. "Well...it happens to us. See, we're not sure on the exact details but supposedly, the first significant couple started it. The first time they practiced Mutuality on each other, the tattoos came along with the names of their significant appearing on the inside of their wrists. From then on, we were all born with their family tattoo. See, when two significants line up their wrists, their half of the tattoo added to the other one becomes a whole and the names create an outline or border. It's really cool, actually."

"So what about us? I don't have one," I said, rubbing my wrist and felt extremely sad for some reason about that.

"You can get one, if you want to."

"How did Gran get hers?"

"She got it done for Papa's birthday one year." He chuckled. "Ever seen a grown man cry?" He chuckled again.

I thought how incredibly sweet that was and I guess I could go get it done but for some reason, it didn't seem the same. I felt left out. Caleb would never have a match for his tattoo unless I went and got the thing myself, which I just might do.

First Class was nice, though I had no idea what Coach was like. We ate our dinner they brought us and they started a movie but I took Caleb's advice and curled up beside him as best I could with my blanket and pillow.

"Sleep, Maggie. I'll be right here."

His hand snaked under my blanket and found mine. He curled his fingers around mine and tugged it, hugged it to his chest, pressing it to his heart so I could feel the two heartbeats. Mine and his, always right there together. We both fell asleep in blissful peace.

I woke up some time later in the dark quiet cabin. I had no idea what time it was but I needed to think when Caleb wasn't in my mind so I lay there, looking at him facing me on his side in his seat. His hair had fallen over on his forehead and around his ears. I brushed it back and then ran my thumb over his dimple and heard his little noise of contentment.

It was still so surreal. He was mine. It seemed impossible that the past nine days had been real. Only nine days since I'd met Caleb. It was crazy.

I thought about the things he had told me about earlier; the mutuality. I had no idea if I was ready for that. I knew I was if I was honest but it was a step for me, a step I'd never taken before, never gotten close to before and even though it wasn't real sex, it still sounded intimate enough that it may as well be.

It wasn't that I was afraid it would change things between us, though it would in a good way, or that I wasn't ready to commit or whatever. I was just scared in general. Scared I wasn't good at whatever it was he wanted me to do. My mind and my insides wouldn't be as good and sweet like he thought I was. I thought bad things all the time. I was no saint, like he apparently was. Tutoring service. Ugh! How could I compete with that?

What if once we got into our minds and true feelings that couldn't be hidden away and he saw the raw me, real and open...he no longer liked it? He was just stuck with me? Everything else about this imprint is different from what I've heard. What happens if he wants out or is unhappy with the results?

Even if that never happened, what if he never gets his ability? He'd resent it, resent me, eventually. I took what was rightfully his and it wasn't fair. I'd fork over my ability to him in a heartbeat if I could. It bothered him, it had to. But, wait! He was asleep. I can go in his mind, he wasn't in mine right now. He said we could poke and prod whenever we wanted and he'd been in mine and I never felt the hazy feeling I had before when he did it.

I pushed a little and slipped into the mind that I couldn't believe I had doubted. I swore to him I wouldn't doubt again and I'd just spent the last ten minutes doing it. His mind was gorgeous. And he loved me, adored me. His mind was lined with my face and a protective barrier so thick. He was worried about my safety above all else, just like he said. My happiness and contentment was right above that.

I pushed further to see our memories lined up and on loop; our greatest hits. I loved how a lot of them were from that short few minutes before the imprint and it made me warm all over. The one that played the most was the first time he saw me. So not even paying attention and absorbed in my own stuff and him completely and utterly taken by me.

I could feel his heart pounding like it had that day. His want to get to know me and his wish that things could be different just like he'd showed me that day at Mugly's.

I pushed further. I saw his desire to please his family but also to do his own thing. He did not want to be an architect, which I already knew, but I didn't know that he had absolutely no intentions of even trying to do anything different. Family was so important and after me, they came next. He was selfless and would be happy if we were. That thought didn't sit well with me. I filed that away to work on another day. I wanted him to be happy, too, really happy, and I'd find a way to make that happen.

The further into his mind I got, the warmer and more out of body I felt. He was all around me, all in me. I could smell him and feel him everywhere and finally understood what Caleb had meant by consuming each other. It was like he was made to be everywhere and everything to me and in me. I got the sensation of euphoria, being drugged, that feeling you feel right at the end of a roller coaster.

It took my breath away how good it felt to be consumed with him. But...there was a little part that held back, that I wasn't allowed to experience. I immediately knew that that part wouldn't be unlocked unless we were together, consuming each other.

When I got to the inner most parts everything was all jumbled, floating around like pieces of a hazy puzzle. His favorite pizza topping was sausage. He loved seeing brand new bands at concerts. His all time favorite movie was The Matrix. He hated to be in the mosh pit. He was upset about not getting his ability but was genuinely happy for me and loved that his family loved me so well. He loved school cafeteria pudding. Was scared of what he'd do if he ever met the guy who hurt his sister. He couldn't stand it when people smacked while they ate. He thought it was so hot when I looked over my shoulder at him with a smile. He loved the beach. His favorite thing to do was take walks at night, wherever he was, because the city and country and beach or whatever looked so different at night.

It was all jumbled and a mess and came at me in no rhyme or fashion. I couldn't pick or choose and couldn't even stop it from coming at me in droves. It felt too hot and unorganized and started to be uncomfortable so I pulled out all the way and felt the chill of the plane air on my face. It felt odd to be me again. I looked at his face and he was still sound asleep. I smiled, strange knowing so many things about him I would have never thought to ask in so little time.

I wanted to know everything. I could see why Caleb seemed to enjoy it. I did, too, and couldn't wait for him to show me how to do it for real and look for specific things.

Being in his mind gave me a taste for it. I wanted all of him. It was like a need, not just a want anymore, to do anything and everything for him and to him. His happiness was paramount and I wanted his happiness to be mine.

My smile grew wider as I had a thought. I pushed it aside, tucking it in the back so he wouldn't see it. Sex was still way out there, but whenever the time was right, soon, I'd try the other. Mutuality.

I still felt tense and apprehensive, I had no idea what it was really or what it entailed or what it would feel like but this was Caleb. I had to stop thinking of him as just a boy. He was mine, for life, my soul mate, my significant. There was nothing to fear with him. He was always careful and loving with me and he would be with this, too.

I pressed my hand a little harder into his chest and felt my heart beat speed up under my fingers as I thought about what mutuality would be like. I giggled silently and took a deep breath to calm my fast heart rate so I didn't alert Caleb and wake him.

Suddenly, I couldn't wait to get to this beach house.