Chapter forty | Something too big for him

Chapter forty | Something too big for him

I tossed and turned in my bed as her words echoed through my mind.

I still love you very much.

I groaned in annoyance as her voice chimed in my mind again. Burying my head in the pillow, I willed for sleep to take over me. But no matter how tired I was, slumber was far from my eyes.

Her words haunted my mind, making me question my decision and actions in the past twenty-four hours. Was I wrong to assume? Did she cheat on me, or did my eyes play a trick on my mind? I questioned, staring at nothing in particular.

A sudden image of her lips connected with Jacob took over my thoughts, making me grumble.

I tossed around in my bed as my eyes flew towards the digital clock sitting on my bedside table. The neon green numbers shone in the darkroom, displaying quarter past four in the morning.

I kept staring at it as the number changed with every passing minute. My eyes turned heavy and throbbing in my brain turned numb.

Finally, I fell into the lull of sleep.

The incessant loud ringing of the bell woke me up from my sleep. I glared at thin air as the ringing continued after a few seconds. Turning my eyes towards the clock, I registered that it displayed half-past ten in the morning.

Who the fuck disturbs someone at ten in the morning on a fucking Sunday? My brain hissed.

Agreeing with the statement, I pulled the covers over my head and buried myself deep into my bed. I tried falling asleep once again, ignoring the person on the front door.

My efforts to drown the ringing noise proved to be futile as my phone rang. I groaned loudly as my head protested at loud sounds.

Cursing under my breath, I brought my phone to my ear.

"Hello... what do you want?" I grumbled, making sure to display my discontent and anger through my words.

"You fuck face!" Connor boomed with his loud voice. "Open the fucking door! I have been standing here for the past half hour."

I winced as my ears threatened to bleed. "Fuck off, Connor. Let me sleep," I moaned, not really in the mood to talk with him.

A faint shuffling sound resounded from the other side. "Elias, listen to me please," Navya started in her soothing voice. "Open the door. We seriously need to talk."

"But I am hungover and want to sleep," I whined like a kid. Navya sighed in exasperation.

"Eli, stop behaving like a kid and open the door," she demanded in a threatening voice, making me sigh heavily.

"I thought you guys didn't want to talk to me again, let alone see my face. What changed?" My voice held equal parts hurt and sass.

It went silent on the other side for a minute. If I were in my sane mind, I would have apologized by now. But since I wasn't, I dozed off again.

"Please, Eli?" Navya whispered, making guilt stab my heart.

How could I feel so much guilt and pain in just 24 hrs?

"Take the spare key from under the rock near the pink potted plant." Sleep turned my voice to a whisper near the end.

I canceled the call as a faint scraping sound echoed from the other side.

My ears could barely register the slight thump of footsteps in the empty house as voices argued in a hushed tone.

"I told you! There is always a key under the plants," Connor boasted as he opened my room door.

Navya was going to retort, but her words died down in her throat as a weird noise came from Connor's throat. Silently they took in the mess my room was.

While my clothes were strewn across the floor haphazardly, my books were a mess on the study table. My distressed burrito state with the stench of alcohol in the air didn't help the matter.

Navya's eyes fell on the open condom box peeking out from my closet drawer. With condom wrappers in the bin, my room painted a vivid picture of my nights.

"So the rumors are right," Navya whispered. "You cheated on Cynthia."

At her words, I shot up from my place. I gave her a heated glare, which she returned heartily.

Ignoring my exploding head, I hissed my next words. "One, we weren't even together in the first place. And two, she was the one who kinda cheated on me." With that, I once again buried myself under the covers and turned away from them.

To my utter amazement, Connor gasped. It was deadly silent for a few moments as my words hung in the air.

My tongue has a sour taste, and it wasn't only because of alcohol.

I gave a pained oof as the air left my lungs. A heavy weight pressed on my stomach as a fist collided with my back. By the size of the bruise I was expecting, I could tell it was Connor.

"You fat-assed pig, get up from me!" I yelled. "I already have a hangover, and I don't need you hurting me more. Let me rest in peace. Go, do whatever shit you guys do. Leave me alone!"

The weight was removed from above me, making me sigh in relief. But soon, my yelp followed as they pulled the covers from around me, making me land on the carpeted floor with a groan.

My stomach sloshed once again in warning. With my eyes blurry, I hurried towards the bathroom. The sound of me retching my guts out echoed with Connor's disgusted noise.

I sighed and grabbed my toothbrush, ridding my mouth from the horrid taste.

All the while, Navya gave me a concerned look. Her eyes over-analyzed my every move with acute concern. "You got drunk last night?" she asked, concerned.

I gave her a blank stare, not bothering to answer the obvious.

Alcohol and hangovers go hand in hand.

"You hate a hangover, Eli, and getting drunk is not your thing. Tell me what happened, Eli?" Navya pleaded.

Connor appeared beside her, blocking the remaining bathroom door.

"Dude, I just woke up to you trending on the school page once again. Picture of you kissing a girl was trending over the page," Connor informed, trying to coax a reaction out of me.

I wanted to appear surprised, but I couldn't fake a reaction. I knew this would happen. I anticipated it when I noticed flashes of phone cameras, even in my inebriated state.

"So?" I asked nonchalantly. To be truthful, I was numb from inside.

"Why do you guys care? Like I said before, you guys didn't want to do anything with me?" My words were harsh, but it was my pain speaking.

Both of my (potentially ex-) best friends gaped at my reaction. Their mouths fell open as their eyes turned wide.

They froze with shock, stuck in their place. I rolled my eyes at their reaction and continued splashing water on my face.

Pushing past Connor, I grabbed my towel and clothes from my wardrobe, making a mental note to clean my room. I walked back in to find them still stuck on the spot.

"If you guys don't mind, I need to shower and use the washroom," I muttered, lightly pushing them out of the door frame.

This made them snap out of their daze, and they shared a concerned look. Their eyes met in a silent conversation, making me huff.

"Eli, are you okay?" Connor asked hesitantly, placing a hand on my shoulder.

I shrugged his hand away and stared at a spot on the wall. I felt long fingers wrap around my arm, making me turn towards Navya.

"Please tell us, Eli. We want our best friend back," she whispered, taking a step closer to me.

Her words pushed me enough to break my mental dam. Silent tears rolled down my cheeks as I wrapped my arms around her.

"No, I am not fine. I hate myself, Navya. I-I am so sorry for everthing I said. I am sorry," I sobbed helplessly, feeling myself falling in a spiral.

The air seemed to be sucked out of the room as heavy tension descended with my words.

I was sure that Navya and Connor were having a silent conversation because my light sniffles were the only sound in the room.

Navya pulled away from my arms, making me look up with a teary face. Connor gave me a grin, rolling his eyes in mock annoyance.

"Don't expect me to hug you." He shrugged for emphasis. "You are being a crybaby, just like girls." His words were teasing.

"Connor, what have I told you about your toxic masculinity?" Navya warned as she gave him a look over her shoulder.

Connor raised his hands in mock surrender, the smile on his brightening.

Navya's soft brown eyes met mine as a slight smile curved her lips.

"Do you remember how we became friends, Eli?"

With a slight nod, I looked down at my bare feet.

"You used to have those animal-shaped chocolates in your lunch when we were younger. We used to share them," Connor said, looking straight my way.

Navya snorted at his comment. "More like bullying him into giving away his chocolates. Then I had to rescue him," Navya added with a grin, patting herself on the shoulder.

At their antics, a small smile filled my features. "When you punched his nose, Connor ran away crying." Connor made a protesting noise, making me roll my eyes. "Then he came back and said that he liked you. Then you broke his nose."

Chuckles filled the air as the atmosphere seemed lighter. Reliving those initial days of our friendship, brought some ease in my mind.

"So more of the story is don't mess with tough girls." Connor elbowed Navya with a cheeky grin.

"No. The moral is that no matter what, we stick together." Connor gave a pout at her blank stare.

Guilt filled my heart as my smile disappeared.

"I am sorry guys. I don't know-" I stammered my apology, but Connor waved his hand dismissively.

"Nah! All forgiven. But do this next time, and I will break your bones," he replied with a smile. "Also, you weren't the only one at fault. We were a bit jealous too that you were leaving us behind."

I wanted to protest, but he shut me up with a stern look. Opening his arms, he motioned me for a hug.

Navya beat me to it, making me squish her between us.

Maybe I could get my friendship back.

The simple thought was enough to make me feel lighter.

"Enough of this Bharat-Milap. Tell me what happened between you and Cynthia. One day it's trending that you guys are dating, and the next day, you go around smooching other girls. You say she cheated on you, how?" Navya tapped her foot with a raised brow.

I didn't comment on her use of her native tongue and gulped at the question.

"Yesterday, I found her kissing Jacob with his hand up her shirt," I whispered. "We fell out after that."

The despair in my voice was clear. My emotions slipped out, letting my pain known. Navya gasped while Connor snorted.

I turned towards him, giving a confused look. He gave me a murderous glare and lightly tapped my head.

"I knew you were socially awkward, but I never knew you were so much of an idiot," Connor taunted, making me narrow my eyes. " I can bet it on my life that she didn't cheat on you."

Navya gave him an incredulous look. "Oh, really? How did you come to such a conclusion," she snarked defensively.

He gave her a soft glare and then turned towards me. His eyes were vulnerable as he spoke his next words.

"She looks at you the same way... I used to look at Navya. Like she is crazy in love with you."

His words were a soothing spell, washing away any anger from our faces. I gave him a long look while Navya averted her eyes.

It got awkward quickly. I cleared my throat, gaining their attention.

"She said she is in love with me," I muttered hesitantly.

Connor beamed while Navya gaped at my words.

"And I might have said it too," I added, making Connor freeze on his spot.

"You love her?" Navya asked hesitantly. I bit my lip hard and meekly nodded to her question.

Soon, I was engulfed in a jumble of arms, suffocating the life out of me.

"Can't breathe," I gasped in a choked voice.

They pulled back as Connor gave me a watery smile. "So, you finally lost your v-card to her, right?" He gestured at the condom box. "Did you have fun?"

I tried to give him an impassive face as images from that night flashed through my mind.

"Yeah," I mumbled. "I lost my virginity to her. It was nice." My mind was in a faraway place when I answered his query.

Noticing my reaction, Connor and Navya silently communicated. Giving a single nod, Connor rushed out of the room in a hurry. Navya placed her hands on my arms and led me to my bed.

As she made me settle on the bed, Connor returned with a bottle of water. "Where is the Aspirin, Elias?" he questioned.

"The bathroom, second last drawer," I mumbled as my gaze slipped towards the window with the curtain pulled together.

Ignoring Navya's protests, I moved on to the bed and made my way towards it. With some desperation thrumming through my veins, I pushed the blinds aside.

The first thing my eyes met was cocoa eyes staring right back at me. A thousand emotions were flowing through them, similar to mine.

Navya peaked from behind me and cursed under her breath. She grabbed my arm and forced me away from the window. Before I could protest, she placed a bottle of aspirin and water in my palm. "Take it. You need it for your hangover," she ordered, making me roll my eyes.

I gulped the pill down as Connor took a seat next to me. He got up with a sudden disgusted look. "This bed smells like your sex sweat," he muttered with a scrunched nose.

A small involuntary smile slipped on my face as Navya chuckled at his words. Trying to keep his charade up, Connor pointed at the box of condoms still peeking out.

"Weren't these condoms a bit too big for you?" Connor teased, earning a pillow on his face as a reward.

"The same way the smallest size is too big for you?" I snarked.

Connor grinned in response and ran a hand through his strawberry blond hair. "I am far from small bro. You can ask Navya about it."

I gave a disgusted look at his words as Navya landed a kick on his shin.

The sudden tenseness in the atmosphere lightened with Connor's words, bringing a small grin on my face.

My phone pinged with a message.

Cynthia: 'Can we talk?'

Navya, who was peering over my shoulder, clicked her tongue. "Gosh, that line sounds like the typical I am your ex-girlfriend line, and this conversation will not end well line."

Connor nodded in agreement as I typed my response.

Elias: 'Let's grab breakfast together in around an hour?'

Connor patted my back and nodded in reassurance. "Talk it out and sort this stuff. You guys belong with each other. Then I will ask you more about your first time experience."

Navya nodded in approval, making me gape at her in surprise. "I agree. I need details."

They moved towards my room door, showing themselves out. "You guys didn't return the key!" I called out after them.

Not bothering to pause in their steps, Navya waved the key in her hand. "This key? Well, tell your parents we are keeping it. Just in case of an emergency."

I shook my head at her words.

All three of us knew the key was either going to get lost, or was going to be used for everything except the emergency.