PSYCHOLOGIST - chp8

Still going strong with two days of full writing. I have a French assignment to do with writing, but who cares, right? This is a whole lot more important.

02/15/23

Hope you enjoy!

Q : what's your favourite season ?

A : autumn or winter . love me some cold .

Liam POV

It was silent. Eerily silent.

He did not know that waiting rooms were supposed to be this quiet. No, in fact, he was ready for screaming toddlers and angry married couples bickering. This was quite the opposite of what he was ready for.

This silence, unsettling at best, did not help with his nerves. His leg bounced up and down, his eyes focused on the very interesting tiles on the floor, and his hands squeezing a stress ball half to death. The stress ball had been given to him by a secretary after she saw him chewing off his fingers and almost crying time after time. That's a big no no in this office, it seemed.

He held his phone in his other hand, begging for a message to come through saying 'haha, we got you! you can come back home!' That was not going to happen, but he still had hoped that it would. If only he could go back home, chill out with a movie and popcorn, talk to his family at the table, smiling comfortably as they all dug into their delicious food, made by his mother dearest.

His classification had been flagged in the system as one that could be worrisome. He assumed it was because one part of him could handle himself, while the other was just a small baby begging for attention.

Why did they flag me if they knew I could take care of others as a caregiver, he thought, sighing and going back to grasp at his hair as he hunched over in his chair, a tight ball near his lungs making it hard to breathe.

In this confusion, he hadn't felt the secretary come over and crouch down, smiling encouragingly at him as he stared at her. Oh.. right. "I'm okay, thank you ma'am."

"I don't really call pulling at your hair 'okay'. Do you need some water? Maybe some music? Do you have your phone?" Though she was being really kind, Liam felt a bit ticked off at the childish tone as it was setting him deeper into his headspace, as if the stress wasn't enough to do that.

"I'm okay, ma'am, really." He smiled his usual grin, trying his best to cheer the lady up and confirm with her that he was fine, but she narrowed her eyes and sighed.

"Alright.." And with that, she left, leaving him back alone to his thoughts as his hand found its way back into his hair, gently grasping and pulling on it as to keep himself grounded and not have a panic attack, which is always preferable.

He sighed and pocketed his phone, finally looking up straight ahead of him as he ran a hand through his hair, sighing once more.

He felt the stares that the people in the silent room were giving him. It said 'stop sighing, it's annoying!' Yeah, well he really couldn't help him. Doctor visits never went well, so that means that psychology visits would go twice as bad. Did he want to open up? No. But he had to, and that's what infuriated him the most. He shouldn't be forced to open up just because his classification may be worrisome.

He still remembers the night he received the news.

Liam came back from school, his expression happy, as per usual. Very little could upset him, so he usually came back home, hugged his family, did his homework, and then laid in bed until dinner. Very, very productive.

Except this time, as he stepped into the house, his happy expression dropped as he looked at his family. They were all sitting in chairs with grim expressions on their faces. They slowly turned to him as if he was some wild animal that would spook. He was not an animal, thank you very much.

"Uhh.. hi?" They did not respond, merely shifted while looking apologetic. "Aww man, look I'm sorry I flooded the bathroom, okay?" he laughed nervously as he recounted a small - not so small - mistake that he had made when he was young. He did, in fact, kinda possibly flood the bathroom and soak the floors outside of it. Wasn't his fault! He had been sure he turned the bath faucet off!

"No, Liam." His mom chuckled dryly. "How 'bout you come sit down, okay?"

"No thank you. I want to know what's up." He closed the door behind him and raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest and looking at all of them. "You do realize you're looking at me as if I killed the neighbor's dog, which I am sure I did not do."

"Liam, enough. Please come sit down." It was Killian's turn to ask him to sit down, and this time, he obliged. He looked at them with increasing fear in his eyes as he set down his backpack next to the door and came over, sitting down at the table and looking each of them in the eye.

"We received a message from the psychologist's office, Li." The words made his mouth go dry, eyes widening and slightly tearing up. His fists clenched and balled up on the table, eyes going frantically around the table.

"No, no. I refuse. You're playing a joke on me!" They looked at him with somber expressions as Amelia came to touch his arm to reassure him. He felt his face flush red and his eyes tear up, his happy expression turning completely upside down as tears threatened to escape, though he would not let them. He jerked away and then looked at her apologetically. "W-what did it say?"

"It said they were worried because of your uncommon classification. Afraid that you wouldn't be able to take care of yourself fully. They want you to talk to a psychologist to make sure you can cope."

"You've got to be kidding me." Liam was shocked, to say the least. He could take ample care of himself, and if he couldn't, then Killain would always be there. Or maybe he wouldn't be.. like when Liam would eventually move out. He shivered and choked on his upcoming sob at the thought and situation.

"The appointment is in two days, Li. I promise we'll be with you the entire way, okay?" Killian rounded the table and came to Liam, hugging him from behind and resting his head on Liam's hair as he embraced him tightly, but not enough to choke him.

"I wanna go alone. I can go alone." Liam looked up at his cousin, then at his mother, and lowered his head in shame. "I'm sorry.."

"Hey hey, there's nothing to be sorry for, I promise. It's just who you are," Killian said.

"Yeah! Besides, you're still my bestie. Nothing's gonna change that, bestie boo." Amelia held out her pinky finger, making Liam smile a tad bit as he reached over and wrapped his pinky around hers.

"Fine.. but I'm still going alone. I've got some homework to do, so I'll see you all at dinner time." He shuffled out of his chair, grabbed his backpack, and went up the stairs, his back hunched and his expression showing fear, but mostly sadness.

Liam hadn't wanted this. He had just wanted to be someone that could take care of others. But now, others had to take special care of himself, and he didn't like that. All the condescending voices, all the soft talk like you would to babies, it was driving him mad! He was a fully functional 19 year old. On top of everything, he was about to be questioned by a specialist that could see through him, that could distinguish when he was lying, when he was serious, and when he was joking to release the nerves bundling up.

This really was not going to be fun. Like, not at all.

"Liam Greenlee? Please make your way to Dr. Niel's office!"

He sighed and got up, taking 1 step every 2 seconds and glaring at the door. He stopped right in front of the door and took a big, very angry breath, even stomping his foot on the floor to assert how angry he was.

'I could just run away..' He looked towards the secretary who was looking directly at him, eyebrow quirked up as she stared him down, basically challenging him to do it. 'Guess not.'

He sighed for the 100th time, it seemed, and opened the door, cringing at the strong smell of musk in the room. The doctor chuckled and beckoned him inside, closing the door after him while he inspected Liam, who was stiff as a board and unmoving.

"You can sit on the couches if you'd like."

"Yeah uhm- no thank you. I'll stand."

"Please, I must insist that you sit on the couches." Though his smile was nice and caring, Liam saw right through the illusion.

"You're about to dig into my brain, I want you to do it while I'm standing up." The doctor looked at Liam in bewilderment before settling down on the couches himself and looking up at him expectantly. Liam caved in and sighed, making his way over to the black leather couch and plopped down, staring awkwardly at the doctor.

He smiled and opened the files he had on Liam. "So, it tells me here that you're a Caregiver, Handler, and a Little. You must understand how rare, and how worrisome it is."

"No, actually. I don't see why it's a problem."

"It has more to do with self esteem and self worth, rather than being worried about one's health. How have you been feeling about this classification?"

And thus, an hour of hell began.

—

Liam got out of the doctor's office as fast as possible, trying to keep his cool as he went to the secretary and sorted some things out before basically storming out of the office.

That had been the most excruciating, painful brain-digging anyone has ever done to him. The doctor had asked all kinds of questions, most of which Liam tried to deflect by asking the doctor a question back, or by making a lighthearted joke.

The doctor didn't quite like that.

So, after some bickering, he finally caved in and told him his honest feelings, being as earnest as he could even if he felt uncomfortable and felt as though his privacy was breached in the worst way possible. That's what psychologists do, anyways. They're not friends, they're foes, in Liam's eyes. At least no one else would know about what went down in that room, with doctor-patient confidentiality and all.

He stepped outside and sighed, then brightened up as he saw his mom's car, with his mom in the driver's seat.

He hurried over to her with a bright smile, opening the door and quickly closing it.

"Mummy! I'm so glad you're here to pick me up." Liam reached over the console and hugged her tight, his only comfort in the predicament he had found himself in.

"I'm here, sonny. Mama's gotcha." She hugged him back and then settled back in her seat. "I'm sorry for my absence these past few days.." Her voice trailed off, and Liam knew what that meant.

"The corporation is back at trying to get your restaurant to close?"

"Yes.. though, we had a win! They sent a health inspector, no doubt blinded by bribes, yet he found that everything was in great shape, so much so that there was no tiny flaw that he could pick on," she stated proudly. "Mia does such a great job." She pauses for a second and nods to herself, then brightens up with a twinkle in her eye. "Speaking of! She came over to see you! It's been much too long."

"Mom- I'm not really feel like mingling with people too much. I just had a stranger turn my brain inside out and make me question everything about myself and my existence." Of course, he was exaggerating.. a bit.

"She brought you a gift." His mom grinned and wiggled her eyebrows. Liam perked up, then eyed her skeptically.

"What kind of gift?"

"Well you'll just have to see, won't you?" She smiled happily. His mother loved Mia with her whole heart, yet their relationship remained platonic somehow. They were the closest of friends, and Liam sometimes envied that. They were so close, in fact, that Mia was a second mom to him almost as soon as they had met.

"So, how's business going, even during all this.. shit?"

"Language! And it's running perfectly, as usual. There might be a menu change to add some more choices with recommendations from clients, which is why Mia and I met up."

"And might I be the first person to taste such exquisite cuisine, madam?" Liam grinned and poked her in the cheek.

"Stop that! And yes, you may." She swatted his hand away with a smile, letting him know that she wasn't angry. They had this easy going relationship since Liam was old enough to understand the world. There had always been a lot of pranking, teasing, cuddles, and sometimes, food fights, especially when Liam was a youngster.

"So, one more question, mother. Who's trying to take down the business?"

She sighed and shook her head. "His name is Donovan Ashford, the son of Christian Ashford. Started his own chain of restaurants, most of which are very successful." She started to get a distant look in her eyes, her hands tightening on the steering wheel. "Our restaurant is in a prime location for tourists and locals, so he's trying to take it over to boost his business and income. Business men these days really love capitalism and ruining small businesses, I tell ya'."

Liam laughed a bit nervously, then went on his phone to search up 'Donovan Ashford'. He frowned when he saw the picture of a very handsome, yet very unsmiling man, though he did look like an ass, with his crisp suits, his sunglasses, and his unwavering face. Classic douchebag material. But, there was something about his eyes that made Liam hurt for him. He looked so sad, and so alone. "I'll take care of it, mom."

"No the hell you will not. Don't go and get someone angry at you, young man. I raised you better than this." She whipped her head to the side as soon as they came to a stop near the traffic light and pinched his cheek roughly.

"Owwww!" Liam flinched back and swatted her away like a fly. "Begone, malevolent spirit!"

"Be quiet, young man. I taught you better than to go confront some upper class businessman and ruin the good reputation we have made with our store. Enough talking about this, please and thank you." She continued driving and let out a long exhale, frowning as she quickly turned to look at Liam. "I'm sorry, hun. I shouldn't have lashed out."

Liam grinned and patted her shoulder. "You're fine, mom. I love you."

"I love you too, young man." They chuckled and Liam settled back into his seat.

Liam looked out the window, a glint in his eyes stating that he would not let Donovan's intimidation as something to fear.

WC ; 2519