71

I finished painting Lizzie's nails and closed the bottle back. I looked at her. Her eyes widened as she looked over the glittery polish. I rested my hands on my thighs, holding the bottle of nail polish in my hands.

"Why are your nails plain, Auntie Evelyn?"

I looked at Amelia, who was sitting criss-cross in front of me. I tilted my head, "My friend Genevieve paints my nails."

She tilted her head, "Where is Genevieve?"

"She's probably at home right now."

"Can we meet her," Lizzie asked as she moved to sit directly beside Amelia.

I thought for a minute. "Maybe one day."

"Is she your best friend?" I shook my head. "Well, who's your best friend?"

"Oliver is my best friend."

Amelia turned her head and looked into the kitchen and gasped, then looked at me.

"But how can he be your boyfriend and your best friend?"

"Mommy said you're getting married," Amelia stated. "Do you have a wedding ring?"

I held out my hand to her. "It's an engagement ring. I won't get the wedding ring until the wedding." I looked at Lizzie. "Sometimes your best friend is the closest person to you and the person you love the most."

Amelia started touching the ring. Lizzie looked at it, then started staring at me again. "Mommy told us that you and Uncle Kai used to love each other, but you had a best friend named Ryan."

I nodded slowly. "Did she really?" They both nodded.

"When is your wedding," Amelia asked.

I shook my head, "I don't know."

"Can we go?"

I tilted my head, "Of course."

"But if you leave again, how will we go," Lizzie wondered.

"Okay, girls, it's time for bed," Caroline interrupted.

I looked at her, then at Lizzie. "I wouldn't have it without you."

She got a sad look on her face. "But why can't you have the wedding here?"

I stared at her as I thought about it. I hadn't considered the possibility.

"We could have the wedding here," Oliver answered.

I looked over at him. He was standing at the edge of the room. "What?"

He took a few steps closer. "We can get married here."

I laughed breathily, in disbelief at the idea. "We haven't planned anything."

He tilted his head. "So we can plan it now."

I glanced at Caroline. There was a wide grin on her face as she looked between the two of us. I looked at Oliver again. "You want to plan a wedding in less than a week?" He nodded. I scoffed as I looked at the twins again. "He's lost his mind."

"Come on, Evelyn, we've done it before," Caroline commented. I looked at her. She uncrossed her arms as she stepped closer. "Planning your wedding will take three days tops."

I looked at the twins. "Should I feel insulted?" They both started giggling. I looked at Oliver again. I could feel the way he was staring at me through my entire body. He walked over and held his hands out to me. I put my hands in his, and he pulled me to my feet. I turned my body to face him and tilted my head. "Are you sure?"

He nodded. "Absolutely."

I couldn't stop the smile that broke out across my face. I moved my hands to hold his face and leaned into him as I kissed him softly. His hands held my waist.

He looked into my eyes. "Is that a yes?"

I nodded, "Yes."

He smiled as he kissed me again.

The sound of clapping, giggling, and cheering was heard from Caroline and the twins. I laughed as I stopped kissing him and slid my hands to his chest.

The front door opened..

I looked down to see Lizzie and Amelia wrapping their arms around the lower half of mine and Oliver's body's. Oliver's arms wound around my body, pulling me flat against him. I moved my hand to Lizzie's head.

"What's going on," Stefan asked.

I looked over as he stepped closer to Caroline. A few seconds later, Kai appeared. His hands were in his pockets. He stopped at the edge of the room.

"Oliver and Aunt Evelyn are getting married," Amelia exclaimed as she ran over to him.

Stefan smiled, "Really? When?" He reached down to her and lifted her up to hold her.

She put her hands on his shoulders. "Mommy said it will take three days."

My attention shifted to Kai, who was walking down the hallway, taking a more discreet path to the kitchen. I moved my hands to Oliver's chest, separating from him to turn to face Care and Stef.

Once the twins spotted Kai, they were running toward him, calling his name. He forced a smile on his face as he knelt down and wrapped them in his arms.

"Shouldn't you two be asleep," he asked as he pulled back, keeping his arms around them.

"We were talking to Aunt Evelyn," Lizzie answered.

"Will you put us to bed, Kai," Amelia added.

Lizzie and Amelia looked at each other. "I want Evelyn to do it!"

Kai looked at Caroline and Stefan, then me. I wasn't sure how to respond. Kai looked at the twins, "Why don't you ask your parents?"

They both turned to face Stefan and Caroline. "Please," they exclaimed.

Caroline and Stefan looked at each other and then looked at the twins. "Only if they want to."

They both looked at me, begging me with the cute looks on their faces. I looked at Oliver. He seemed unbothered. I looked at the twins again, and Kai was whispering something to them. A second later, they were running over to me, and he was standing.

I looked down at them as they wrapped themselves around my legs, staring up at me with wide eyes.

"Please, Evelyn," Amelia begged.

"We haven't ever seen you," Lizzie added.

"And you'll be leaving us again," Amelia said finally.

I sighed as I looked at Oliver. "I'll be back."

He tilted his head, "Take your time."

I leaned over and kissed him before focusing my full attention on the twins. They started giggling as they ran past Kai to go to the stairs. I walked after them, and Kai followed a few steps behind me. I stopped at the bottom of the steps and turned to face him.

"You're a dick," I said quietly enough for only him to hear.

He smiled, "I don't know what you're talking about."

I rolled my eyes as I started walking up the stairs. He walked beside me. "Using children to get me alone is conniving and evil."

"But it's getting me somewhere, so..."

I couldn't bite back the smile that crossed my lips.

The girls' bedroom was across from my mom's. I tried to settle my nerves as I turned away from it. Kai stopped by the door, letting me walk in first. Lizzie and Josie were setting up stuffed animals in their window.

Kai stepped beside me. "Have you ever put kids to bed?"

I shook my head after a minute. "I never got the chance." I breathed out slowly. "Did you ever put your siblings to bed?" I looked at him.

He was already staring at me. His eyes darted to my lips for a second before looking into my eyes. "Sometimes."

I remembered what he told me about his past and his relationships with his siblings before everything went down. He had a close bond with his youngest brother, but as he became a bad guy, their relationship turned sour.

"No, it's mine!" Lizzie's voice brought me back to the present and out of mine and Kai's dead relationship.

Kai and I walked over. He reached for the teddy bear and pulled it from his hands, and tossed it to me. I caught it and pulled it to my body. The girls whined and complained. Kai grabbed Lizzie and held her up, staring at her face.

"You can argue tomorrow." He laid her in her bed, leaning over her as he tucked the blanket around her snuggly. "You have to sleep now, munchkin." He kissed her head and then stood up straighter.

"But I want the bear."

I looked down at the bear in my hands, then at Amelia. She looked up at me. She lifted her hand and waved for me to come down to her. I bent down, and she cupped her hands around my ear as she whispered, "I want to give her the bear."

I handed it to her and then stood back up. She rushed to Lizzie and laid the bear next to her. Lizzie smiled as a giggle poured out of her throat. Kai walked over to Amelia and wrapped his arms around her, then tossed her on her bed gently, earning a fit of giggles, which made me smile.

He started to tuck her in when she sat up, "Wait. I want Evelyn to do it."

He pulled back and turned to me. "Evelyn," he sang softly. His voice resonated deeply within me, stirring something that needed to stay settled.

I tilted my head as I walked over. He stepped back, his eyes locked on mine. He turned to Lizzie after a second. I sat at the edge of her bed, and she laid back. I lifted the blanket and pulled it to cover her body before tucking it tightly around her body.

She laid her arms on top of the blanket and grabbed my hand. "Will you lay with me, Evelyn?" Her soft, pleading voice pulled at the strings of my heart.

"No, I want her to lay with me," Lizzie cried as she sat up.

I looked over at Lizzie, then at Kai. He had a grin on his face. "Grab her."

He nodded as he walked to Lizzie. I lifted Amelia and carried her to my old room, followed by Kai. I tossed her on the bed that was made up, earning a giggle from her. I smiled as I sat next to her. She moved to climb under the blanket when Lizzie did.

"Can Kai lay with us," Amelia asked me.

I thought for a moment, then looked at Kai. He was standing at the end of the bed. His eyes scanned my face, searching for an answer in my expression. He uncrossed his arms as he walked over and sat on the other side of Lizzie. We lay beside them, lying on our sides, boxing them between us.

Amelia stared at me as I stared at her. "Why did you leave us, Aunt Evelyn?"

Her question struck me hard, making my throat feel tight. "I didn't like being here, and it was making me really sad. I had to leave to get better."

"But couldn't mommy make you better," Lizzie asked.

"She makes me better," Amelia said.

"Yeah," Lizzie added. "She makes everything better."

"It's because she's your mommy," I responded.

"Why were you so sad," Amelia asked.

I was unsure of how to answer her. Telling my depressing life story to children isn't exactly a strong suit of mine. "Because I was losing more than I had."

"Did you find it," Lizzie asked.

"I did."

"Where was it," Amelia asked.

I looked at her, "Everywhere."

"You went everywhere?"

I nodded. "Pretty much."

"Does that mean you are ready to come back?"

I shook my head once. "I don't know."

"But everyone you love is here," Lizzie responded sadly.

"Does that not make you sad," Amelia added.

I stared at them both, wondering how they could have such complex questions so late. I looked at Kai, who seemed even more interested in the answer than the twins did. The look in his eyes perfectly encapsulated the yearning and loss circling between us.

I looked at the twins again. "I'm not leaving you forever. I'll always come back for you."

"Even to just talk to us," Lizzie asked.

I smiled, "Especially to just talk to you." They both smiled. "Now, close your eyes and go to sleep."

"Will you tell us a story," Lizzie asked Kai.

I glanced at him. He was staring at them. "Close your eyes first."

They listened to him, closing their eyes almost instantly, which made me smile. I stared at the twins, watching as their eyes went from being forcefully shut to relaxed. I laid back, keeping my hand wrapped around Amelia's.

"One day, a really long time ago, I was really bored and wanted to have fun. I decided to find some people to hang out with. I ended up at a party. It was very loud and kind of boring so I looked for a quiet room. I stumbled upon the prettiest girl I've ever seen."

I looked over at Kai, who was staring directly at me as he spoke. This story's about us.

"We talked for a while, then I took something to remember her by because I knew I would see her again."

"Very cocky of you to assume."

A smirk graced his lips. "How do you know I didn't just read her mind when we were getting to know each other?"

Dimming it down to getting to know each other feels disgraceful and wrong. "I don't know, but I'm hoping. Reading the mind of a girl you just met is distasteful and doesn't work in your favor."

"But it did."

I shook my head and then looked at the ceiling. "First, you use the children against me, and now you're violating the privacy of our relationship, that is long gone by the way, by sharing it with children." I looked at him. "I hope you know this is low, even for you."

He smiled. "You're the one in bed with me."

"Thanks for reminding me I can go now."

He kept staring at me. "If you move, they'll wake up."

I looked from him to the twins. "You're bluffing." I looked at him.

A smile crept on his lips. "Are you sure about that?"

I sighed as I looked away from him. "I hate you."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night."

"Staying away from you helps me sleep at night, but here we are."

"I'm not stopping you."

I scoffed, "Maybe not directly."

"I'm not stopping you at all."

"If I move, they wake up." I looked at him. "You're the reason I'm in this room in the first place. If you hadn't told these two to beg me to put them to bed..."

"I didn't have to do much convincing. Neither did they, for that matter. And if you want to leave, you're welcome to. Just be aware of the effect it will have."

"What do you expect me to do here? If I move, it wakes them up. If I don't, I'm stuck here with you the entire night."

"Are you blaming me for your situation," he smiled.

I raised up on my arm and looked directly at him. "I'm blaming you for everything, actually."

"Everything," he hummed, amused.

"Yes," I stated bluntly.

"Like your marriage, the life you've built for yourself, your ability to just forget everything that's happened to you..."

"I didn't forget everything."

"Are you sure about that? Because I haven't heard from you in three years. The only reason I knew you were here was because I saw you. I had to find out you're engaged from the ring on your finger."

"My life now is none of your business, and taking credit for what I've done for myself is -"

"Is right. I gave you the opportunity to start over. If I hadn't let you go, you would be stuck here and probably dead, too."

If there weren't two sleeping children between us, I would snap his neck. Getting angry is exactly the reaction he wants, and I hate giving him any sort of satisfaction.

"Admit it, you know I'm right."

I furrowed my brows, "You want me to thank you for pushing me away? For getting me away from the people I love? For doing things you promised you'd never do?"

"Yes. Because deep down you know it was the only option for you. If I hadn't made that decision for you, Evelyn, you would never have gotten away from the hell you were living. You hated your life and the way people treated you. The only thing keeping you from being happy was me. I cut that tie because I knew it was the only way you'd ever have the life you wanted. And all I've ever wanted for you is for you to be happy and have what you never thought you could. Hate me if you want, but I would at least like a thank you for getting you the hell out."

The anger flowing through me was making my head feel like it was going to explode. "If I've learned anything in the past three years, it's that what you did for me was far from a favor, Kai. I never asked you to let me go, I asked you to be with me and love me. But you never could."

"What did you expect from me, Ev? Did you want me to keep you locked away from everyone?"

"If that's what it took, then yes. I would've let you do anything as long as it was for you. You could've dragged me away to the other side of the world or locked me in a prison world. I wanted you to want me so much you were dying just to think of me. I wanted you to be selfish and keep me to yourself." My throat felt narrow as I drew in a breath of air. "All I wanted from you was you. And learning that you couldn't do that hurt worse than anything. So I'm not going to thank you for that."

The sting of my words was evident in the sorrow shining in his eyes. It hurt to see the way it affected him.

I moved off the bed as carefully as possible and left the room. I pulled the door shut and started down the hallway. I heard him say something under his breath as he pulled the door shut. A moment later, his hand was wrapped around mine, preventing me from walking further. I kept my eyes closed as I breathed out slowly. He moved closer to me, holding my hand tighter.

"Keeping you from what you could have, what you were meant for, was killing me, baby. I couldn't live with myself knowing that you needed more than me. Please tell me you understand that."

The feeling of his hand around mine was what I've been missing for the longest time, and actually having it makes everything melt away for one sensational moment.

I pulled my hand from his as I turned to face him. I didn't give myself time to look at him as I wound my arms around his neck. Instantly, his arms were around me, holding me close to his body as if it were what we've been doing all along.

"I understand." I leaned into him and opened my eyes. "And I forgive you."

He slid his hand to the back of my neck. I breathed him in, marking every aspect of the moment. The feeling of his body against mine seeped into my body as if it were the blood keeping me alive.

After a moment, I pulled away from him. The thoughts in my mind were impeached by my fiance. My hands rested against his chest, and his were weighted on my hips. I looked from my hands to his face, staring into his eyes.

"Congrats, Ev." He tilted his head slightly, letting his eyes skate across my face before looking into mine again. "You'll make a beautiful bride."

His words soaked into me, imprinting on my mind. Part of me wished I was his bride. That thought made me panic. I love Oliver, and he's the one I want to be with.

Kai's phone started ringing as I opened my mouth to speak. He sighed as he pulled away further. "Sorry."

I shook my head as I held my hands together behind my back. "I'm going back downstairs."

He nodded as he answered the call, stepping away. I turned and walked away. I stepped into the living room, finding it empty.

"Evelyn."

I turned to the kitchen to see Caroline, Stefan, Oliver, Damon, and Elena standing around the kitchen island, talking. Damon and Caroline were both drinking. I walked over, stopping by Oliver. He slid his arm around me as I stepped closer to him. I looked at Caroline and Stefan.

"Are they asleep?"

I nodded. "They're in my bed, though."

"Let me guess," Caroline sat her glass down. "They wouldn't fall asleep until you laid with them."

"Mhm. They're very convincing."

She smiled.

"Where's, uh, Kai?"

I looked at Stefan. "Phone call."

"Did he lay with you too," Damon asked in a caustic tone.

"Damon," Elena warned. I felt Oliver's hand grip my hip gently. I looked at Elena. "We were just talking about how you're getting married while you're here," she smiled.

I smiled and looked at Oliver. I looked at Elena again. "Yeah, it -" I was interrupted by the sound of the front door slamming.

I turned my attention to the living room. After realizing it was Kai, I pulled away from Oliver. I walked to the front door, pulling it open. Kai was walking down the porch steps with his hands in tight fists.

"Hey." I walked toward him.

He stopped and turned to me. "What?" His tone made me freeze for a minute.

"Um, no." I took a step closer, "Don't storm out of the house without saying anything, then get upset with me when I'm trying to talk to you."

He sighed as he turned to face me fully. "I don't have time to talk to you, Evelyn."

I furrowed my brows, "What's wrong with you?"

He tilted his head, staring at me for a minute, then stepping closer. "My mom just died."

The sadness I felt for him made my heart pick up. I shook my head, "I'm sorry, Kai."

He shook his head, "Don't worry about it." He started to turn away.

I rushed toward him, grabbing his hand. "Stop."

He stopped, keeping himself turned away from me. "Evelyn."

I slid my fingers between his. "You can't drive like this."

He huffed out a breath of air. "It's not like I have a choice."

I grabbed his jaw and turned his head to make him look at me. "I do." He was hesitant to accept my offer. "Give me your keys." I moved my hand from his face, holding it palm up.

He looked at my hand as he reached into his pocket. He placed his keys in my hand as his eyes found mine again.

"What's going on," I heard Oliver ask from behind me.

I tilted my head. "Give me a minute."

He nodded slowly and then pulled away from me. I turned to Oliver and walked over to him, stopping a foot from him. "I have to go with him."

He furrowed his brows. "What? Why?"

I took a breath as I put my hand at the side of his face. "His mom died. He was there for me when my mom died, and I wanted to do the same for him. He can't be alone right now."

He wrapped his hand around my wrist and wound his other arm around my waist. "Are you sure?"

I nodded, "Yeah." He pulled me closer then pressed his lips to mine, kissing me slowly. I leaned into him, kissing him back. After a minute, I pulled away from the kiss, looking into his eyes. "I'll call you."

"For anything, Evelyn."

I slid my hand to his. "I love you."

He kissed my forehead. "I love you too."

I pulled away from him and walked to Kai's car. I got in the driver seat. I started the car. I looked at him. He was staring out his window.

"Where do you want to go?"

He shook his head once as he looked at the windshield.

Anywhere it is.

I started driving, unsure of where to go. I kept both hands on the wheel, trying to keep my focus on the road. I glanced at him, wondering what thoughts were going through his head. It's been so long since he's opened up to me.

I focused on the road as I drove to his apartment. Taking him anywhere except home to sleep would lead to self-destructive behavior. I parked the car and shut off the engine.

I looked at him. "Come on."

After a moment, he sighed as he started to get out. I got out and walked to the end of the car. He walked over and followed me as I walked up to his door. The elevator was silent and filled with only the sad, low hum. I opened the door and stepped in, holding it open for him to walk in. I shut the door once we were both in. I sat the keys on the table by the door.

I turned to him. He laid his jacket on the arm of the couch before walking to the kitchen. I kept my arms crossed over my chest as I followed after him. As he sat the bottle of bourbon on the counter, I grabbed it from him.

"No alcohol."

He sighed as he looked at me, "What?"

I sat the bottle away from him and looked at his face. "Drinking will make it better for an hour, then you'll go back to hating everything. You need to grieve with a clear head."

"Seeing as your presence is clouding every sense of my better judgment, I doubt alcohol will tip those scales in any way."

He started to reach for the bottle, and I grabbed his hand. "Kai, listen to me."

He tilted his head, "What, Evelyn?"

"The best thing for you to do right now is not avoid your feelings or push them away. Work through them instead of away from them. Talk about it, kill someone if you have to, but don't use alcohol as an emotional crutch."

"Fine."

I pulled my hand from his. "Fine."

He turned and started walking away. I followed him to the couch and sat down. I kept distance between us out of respect for Oliver and myself.

"Shouldn't you be with your fiance?"

I looked at him. "Yeah."

"Then why are you here?"

"To stop you from doing something stupid that you'll regret."

"Like you did."

I tilted my head. "And what did I do?"

"You slept with me."

I opened my mouth to protest, but I couldn't. I nodded as I looked away from him again. "Great example." I looked at him, "But we can't have sex this time, so..."

"Because you're with Oliver."

I nodded. "Yes."

"And that's the only reason?"

I furrowed my brows. "Are you trying to make me leave?"

He shook his head, "It's a genuine question." He turned his body to face me. "If you weren't with Oliver or anyone else, would you have sex with me right now?"

I thought for a moment, remembering what it was like. Every lust filled, amorous moment with him that made my skin feel hot surfaced in my mind, making it hard to not think of him in that way. "You know, out of everything that's changed, why did that have to stay the same?"

"You mean my irresistible charm?"

"I mean your inability to say something worthwhile." I turned further toward him, "You're so focused on what it was like having sex with me that you probably haven't even thought to ask what my relationship with Oliver is like."

"You're getting married to the guy. As much as I hate to admit it, he's probably okay."

"Okay?"

He smiled, "Is my disapproval of your soon-to-be husband shocking to you?"

I shook my head, "Not in the slightest."

"Then what is it," he laughed. He moved closer. "Do you want me to hate him more or less?" I was unsure of how to answer him. "You're happy with him. Everyone knows that. You're living the life you've always wanted, and everyone's happy for you. You found a life that fits you. You found a guy. A good guy."

"A guy who's not you." Not only was I surprised by the rush of words that escaped my mouth, but by the tone of them. Disappointment was the last thing I expected when talking about Oliver.

"That's not necessarily a bad thing." His eyes flicked to my lips before staring into my eyes again. "He's good for you, Ev." He nodded. "You have to accept that. Don't back out just because of the things I've said."

I felt like I couldn't breathe. "I'm sorry," I breathed.

I started to get up, but he grabbed my hand, pulling me closer. "It's okay."

My eyes found his again. He nodded slowly as he moved his hand to the side of my face, pushing my hair back behind my ear, then cradling the side of my face in his palm.

The look in his eyes hasn't changed after all this time. The love is still there. He's still the guy I fell in love with, and he's trying to keep that from me to keep me from going back to him. Admitting to myself that I would do that is heartbreaking.

He leaned forward, pressing his lips to my forehead. My eyes fell shut as I breathed out slowly. After a thoughtful moment of trying to let go, I pulled back and looked at him. The soft look in his eyes made my heart skip a beat.

"You should go." He tilted his head, "You should be celebrating with him."

I don't want to leave him. "Are you sure? I don't want you to be alone."

He nodded. "I'll be okay."

I sighed as I pulled away from his touch. "Will you call me if you need something?"

He reluctantly nodded. "I'll see you around."

After a moment of heavily debating, if I should stay with him, I got up. I walked out without giving myself another chance to stay.

I texted Oliver where to pick me up before walking to the location. He was waiting when I got there. He asked a few questions, but I kept my answers short. I didn't mean to sound so uninterested, but it was difficult.

I pulled his shirt over my head before walking to the bed and climbing under the blankets. I laid on my back, staring at the ceiling. After he lay next to me, he turned off the lamp.

"Evelyn."

I looked at him after a moment. "Yeah?"

"What's wrong, baby?"

Baby. I didn't want to answer him. Keeping the truth from him isn't something I do. "Being back here," I turned to my side, "it's bringing up a lot of old feelings."

He was quiet for a minute. "About your mom?"

"Yeah," I lied.

I watched as a passing look of relief swarmed his features before dissipating quickly. He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me against him. I kept my arms tucked between us. "I'm sorry, sweetheart." He pressed a kiss to the top of my head before smoothing his hand over my hair.

My eyes fell shut as I let myself melt into him. "Thank you for being here for me."

He held me tighter. "Thank you for letting me."

I let his words seep into me. He's told me before that I don't have to let people into my life. Entering someone's life is a privilege, and he's glad to have it. That's why he doesn't push my boundaries unless I've verbally expressed he can.

Telling him what I want all the time can be exhausting, and it can make me miss certain aspects of the life I had, but then I remember everything I went through, and then boundaries sound like heaven.