Chapter 54

A

s the first rays of sunlight pierced through the curtains, a soft golden glow bathed the room, casting shadows over the walls. The cold morning air bit at my naked skin and I shivered, still at unease. Goosebumps spread all over my body as I turned around on the ground.

There was a metallic taste in my mouth; it was what fear would taste like.

I shifted.

After spending my whole life as a runt, I finally shifted into the werewolf I was meant to be. Resting on the ground, I thought it was never going to happen and now it had, leaving me with a mix of disbelief and fear.

My body ached from the transformation while my mind grappled with the realization that the girl I was had been changed forever. I was no longer just April; I was something wild, a werewolf with a burning hunger stretching inside me.

My fingers brushed against the wooden floors as I forced myself up from the ground as morning came. It was painful, the worst pain I had ever experienced. It was as if every bone in my body was taking form, every muscle was twisting while I was shifting into a werewolf. I didn't know how bad it felt until it actually happened.

A groan left my throat as I pressed my back against the cold wall. The clothes I had been wearing were shredded into pieces, just in the same way I was. My hair was a tangled mess, sticking to my skin.

Grabbing onto the nearest table, I shoved myself up from the ground and got on my numb feet. It took me hours before I could shift back, before I had the energy to shift back. I spent the entire night in here, alone, in my wolf form. The only thing I needed wasn't here.

Nicholas.

I made my way to the bathroom and stepped under the hot water. When it touched my skin, my muscles soothed and relaxed. The shifting had left a few bruises on me and a couple cuts over my arm, but with every moment passing by, I could see them healing.

I wasn't a runt anymore.

I didn't have to play safe.

I didn't have to hide in the shadows anymore.

As the hot water began to run cold, I turned off the shower and stepped out, feeling slightly refreshed. Droplets from strands of my hair dripped onto the ground before I wrapped my hair in a towel and grabbed a few clothes for myself from the bag I had brought.

Several voices reached my ears with a clarity I had never known before. My sense of smell was great. The lingering aroma of soap, the faint trace of morning dew outside, and even the scent of freshly brewed coffee from downstairs enveloped me.

After drying my hair, I sat down on the bed to catch my breath. What happened last night was something I could never forget. It was the first night I shifted, the first night I had experienced the raw power and primal instincts of my werewolf form.

It wasn't going to be long before I went into heat.

When I went downstairs, I was met with familiar faces.

"Do you need something to eat?" Maude asked me, concern on her face.

I nodded, "Just something light please."

As Maude went to prepare my breakfast, I turned to Malik who had surely heard me shift. "How was it?"

"Intense," A heavy breath parted my lips as I whispered. "And unexpected. I want to talk to Nicholas. Can you make that happen?" I was at the edge, completely confused and surprised. My ego had set itself aside. I wanted to talk to him, even if it were a few minutes.

Malik hesitated before responding to me. "It won't be possible," He said. "But I'll see what I can do. If I can try making contact with him, I'll surely let you speak."

My lips pursed and I became quiet, not sure what to say. I knew that Nicholas couldn't make any contact with me, but I needed him now more than ever. I didn't have anyone to turn to except for him. Yet, I couldn't find him anywhere near.

"If you need any help with anything—"

I stopped him and shook my head. "It's fine. I'll manage it."

Turning around, I left the room and walked over to the kitchen where Maude had finished preparing the breakfast. I took a few bites of it before setting it aside. There wasn't much hunger within me, not for food.

Dark gray clouds rolled over the sky as I stepped out to get a breath of fresh air. My body was still aching after the transformation. I needed to give it rest, to sleep, but my mind wasn't at ease to simply just shut off. Pacing around the garden, I thought heavy and hard while nibbling my bottom lip. I considered the days, the weeks I was going to spend here alone, without Nicholas.

It terrified me.

I didn't want this.

The shift was meant to make me happy; it was meant to take all of my worries as I spent my whole life waiting for my werewolf to surface. But I wasn't happy, I wasn't cheering with glee—I was alone, scared and struggling.

But there was one thing great about it. Now that I had my wolf, I could fight my brother easily, anywhere and everywhere. He couldn't hurt me ever or even kill me.

I rushed around the house to find Malik by evening, when I had finally come terms with my new reality.

"I want you to train my wolf." I said, entering the seating room and interrupting his reading.

He looked up at me in surprise. "You just shifted. It would be impossible to train a new wolf until you've become completely comfortable in that skin." He explained, slowly closing the book in his hand.

"I don't care. I won't be ever comfortable, especially not now when I finally shifted are decades of waiting. For years, I had been counting down the days until I would shift, and I did," I paused, taking in a breath. "You trained me before, you can train me now, just in my wolf form."

"I don't have the permission to do so either. I cannot go against the alpha's wishes and train your wolf until he had explicitly mentioned me to do so." Malik responded, his voice etched with concern.

I let out a frustrated sigh. It seemed like everything was against me, every obstacle put in my way. But I refused to take that as an answer.

"Nicholas left me here, alone, to fight off his father, and I have no clue when he's going to return, or if he's even going to alive by the end of this. I don't know and I don't want to sit around waiting for it," I said, desperation creeping into my voice. "If you're not going to train me, I'll find someone else to, or I might just do it alone. It's going to be a bigger problem if Nicholas finds out that you let me go on my own into the wild." My hands folded across my chest as I gave him a warning.

"Are you threatening me?" He rose up and asked.

"I am," I replied, my voice firm and my gaze fixated on his. "Train my wolf or you're going to have a bigger problem."

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