Chapter 8
Midnight Secrets
When I spotted Cassius across the dining hall the next day, I wasnât surprised. It was the law of the universe: if you masturbated thinking about a guy, youâd run into him soon after. At least he was across the room, and I had a chance of getting through this without him noticing me or having to talk to him.
My focus couldnât remain off of him for too long as I filled up a to-go box. Thank god I was meeting some friends for lunch in the courtyard and not here. I wasnât sure I could handle being in the same room as Cassius for too much longer.
He looked good. Too fucking good. Heâd always been handsome and unbelievably gorgeous, but today was different. It wasnât like I hadnât noticed his looks, but it had been dimmed and hidden by my bitter grudge against him. The shield Iâd been hiding behind was now gone. It was like a genie that couldnât be put back into the bottle.
Donât get me wrong, he was still the asshole who ghosted me, but that didnât stop my body from desiring him. The pain I felt when he didnât respond to my calls or texts didnât stop me from staring in rapt attention as he pushed his hair from his face. Nor did it stop me from practically drooling when his arm muscles flexed at the movement.
It took a significant amount of effort on my part, to look away from him and focus on the food in front of me. Getting caught staring at him was something Iâd rather not deal with right now. I wanted to give the impression of being unaffected by him, even if it was a lie.
As I neared the exit, I couldnât help myself and glanced at him over my shoulder, only to meet his gaze.
He was standing with his palms resting on the table in front of him as he leaned forward. The muscles flexing in his arms would have distracted me if his eyes werenât holding me captive. His expression was impossible to read as we remained locked in a stare-off. I couldnât look away, even if I wanted to. It was like we were two magnets being pulled together.
I couldnât say how long we watched each other. It couldâve been a minute, or it couldâve been five for all I knew.
When he finally looked away to respond to someone behind him, I let out a long breath and gave my head a firm shake. All the fucker had to do was make eye contact with me, and I crumpled like a wet paper towel. I was fucked.
This proved to me that I needed to stay the hell away from him. I clearly hadnât ever truly gotten over my crush on him.
As I walked across campus to meet my friends, I used the time to calm down my racing pulse and cool the desire that had made an appearance upon seeing him. It wasnât fair that he affected me like this and by doing absolutely nothing.
Melissa, Jamie, and Sam were already sitting at one of the three stone picnic tables, already eating. The table was circular, allowing us to be able to see each other, and had enough seating for the four of us to comfortably sit.
âThere you are,â Jamie said, adjusting her glasses as I sat between her and Sam. Like Melissa, she and I had been friends since high school, having bonded over being redheads. Sometimes, it was the simplest of things to kick-start a long-lasting friendship.
âHey guys, what did I miss?â
âWe were just planning our girls-night-in at my place this Saturday. You free?â Sam brushed her short, dark hair from her eyes as she glanced at me. We met her freshman year through Eric and quickly became friends. Unlike the rest of us, she lived off campus with a couple of her friends.
I pretended to mull it over for a few seconds, tapping my chin. âYeah, Iâm free.â
âWhat about Addie and Sel?â Jamie asked once she swallowed her food.
Sel immediately responded to the message I sent in our group chat, saying yes with a whole bunch of exclamation marks. With Addie currently in class, I knew she wouldnât respond for the next half hour. âSelâs in.â
âWeâre planning on throwing in some money for pizza and alcohol,â Melissa said as she closed her empty container.
I nodded my agreement, having already been planning on offering money. Not only had I saved up from working this past summer, but I already started back up on my waitressing job at the diner this past weekend. I didnât work often since I wanted to focus on school and only worked the weekends along with Addie.
During the remainder of our lunch break, we planned our girlâs night. We bounced back and forth between romantic comedies, trashy romance movies that were laughably bad, and comedies. The only agreement we could come to was each of us bringing a movie, and weâd decide that night which to watch.
Jamie also talked about bringing some games, while Melissa mentioned something about a âfun and easyâ craft. I was a little wary about what she considered easy since our opinions on an easy craft varied.
Near the end of our lunch break, I received a text from Addie, telling me she was also in.
âWhatâs this Ezraâs last name?â Sel asked later that night while we all worked on homeworkâor we were supposed to beâwhile having the TV on in the background. âMaybe I can find his socials.â
âDonât know, and donât care,â I muttered as I flipped to the next page of my textbook.
âNow youâre just being selfish. Iâm dying to know what this creep looks like. First, you refused to sneak a picture of him, and now youâre denying me the chance to stalk him online. You canât tell us heâs good-looking without showing us what he looks like. How am I supposed to accurately give you advice when it comes to him?â
I snorted as I shook my head at her ridiculous reasoning. âI donât need advice when it comes to him because I donât want anything to do with him, as Iâve already told you, and if I recall correctly, you agreed with my reasoning.â
âYeah, that whole coffee date thing was off,â Sel muttered as she typed on her laptop.
âIt wasnât a coffee date,â I said with a groan. âNever use âdateâ in any sentence regarding him.â
âYouâre not fooling anyone, Sel. We all know the only reason you want to know what he looks like is to see if heâs hot,â Addie said as she pulled a bottle of water from the mini-fridge. âGuys with multiple red flags, like him, have always been your type.â
Sel gasped in offense, but she had no argument. The redder the flags, the more interested she was. It was the main reason I wasnât letting her anywhere near Ezra. Even though nothing was charming about that man, I was afraid sheâd fall for his bullshit. It wasnât that I thought she was naive or an idiot, but she had a habit of going for the more bad-boy type.
What kind of friend would I be if I let her get involved with a guy I wasnât willing to spend time alone with? Not only that, but if she did get involved with him, then Iâd be forced to see him around even more, and that wasnât something I was willing to deal with. If Sel started a thing with Ezra, heâd also end up finding out where I lived. The thought had my body growing cold. Meaning that I had to ensure either Sel and him never met, or she was creeped out enough by the guy that she wouldnât be interested. It may have been a selfish motivation on my part, but I wasnât willing to budge on this.
âTrust me, youâre not missing out. There are better guys out there for you.â
âYouâre no fun,â Sel grumbled but didnât press this further.
âDonât you still have Shirtless guy texting you?â Addie asked, pulling the conversation away from Ezra. She covered her mouth as she yawned for the umpteenth time tonight. Whenever she stayed out all night, like she had last night, she was usually exhausted and a bit cranky the next day.
Shirtless guy was the nickname we gave the guy Sel gave her number to at the frat party. At least once a day, he sent shirtless mirror pics, never revealing his full face. I thought it was a little suspicious, but Sel had become intrigued by the mystery. Like I said, the girl loved her red flags. But Iâd take her talking to this guy over Ezra any day of the week.
Sel began twirling her hair around her finger as she said, âYes, Iâm still talking to him. You wouldnât expect it, but heâs one sweet talker.â
âItâs the shirtless pics, right?â I chuckled as I dodged the crumpled-up piece of paper she threw at me.
âDo us all a favor before you go falling for this guy,â Addie said as she looked up from her laptop at Sel, her expression serious. âMake sure to get a face pic of him. Itâs always best to know who you are talking to.â
âYouâre such a fucking mom friend,â Sel said with a chuckle, making Addie roll her eyes as she fought a smile.
âNot to mention, youâre a vain bitch. I mean, what if heâs ugly?â I made a dramatic gasp, clutching my chest.
âHeâs been wanting to meet up for lunch, but Iâve been hesitant.â Sel paused, tapping her chin in contemplation before grabbing her phone and typing a message to him. She glanced up and found Addie and I staring at her, waiting for her to tell us what she sent him. She rolled her eyes and chuckled as she set her phone on her desk. âNosey bitches.â
âWell?â I asked impatiently, waving my hand in a get-on-with-it gesture.
âI told him Iâd only go to lunch with him if he sent me a picture of his face. And not a mirror selfie.â
âHave him hold up a spoon or something random, so you know itâs really him,â Addie said as she returned her focus to her laptop, pulling her fading purple hair into a bun.
Addie and I spent the next few minutes suggesting random items for him to hold up, each becoming more ridiculous as time went on. He eventually responded, agreeing to her terms. When he finally sent the picture, Addie and I were hovering over Selâs shoulder to get a good look at him. He was handsome in the frat boy kind of way, but that was one of Selâs types. His face was clean-shaven, and his hair was messy in a way that was intentional.
With him having sent a picture, they officially set a lunch date this Sunday, and while Sel went to the bathroom, Addie and I made plans to go to the restaurant and watch the date from afar. Both for her safety and out of curiosity.
It wasnât like we had anything better to do.