Chapter 4 - Maybe Its Better To Break
I Won't Go Back to My Family Who Abandoned Me
***
âDiana, how did you spend your time today?â
At the dinner table. Marquis Leroy asked, setting a finely chopped steak down in front of Diana. Diana glanced at Leticia and smiled broadly.
âI had a chat with brother Levion over tea.â
Leticia, who was silently eating, paused. Even though she was in the mansion, she didnât know Levion came. It meant that Levion came to see only Diana, and not her.
Pretending not to see Leticia, who was frozen and still, Marquis Leroy continued asking Diana.
âYoung Master Elle?â
âYes. He even gave me a present saying he was sorry he couldnât come to my birthday party.â
The Leroy and the Elle family were close since childhood and were comfortable calling each other informally.
Diana held out her wrist, bragging about how Levion had given her a ruby bracelet.
âIsnât it beautiful?â
âIt looks good on you, dear. Do you like it?â
âYes! Iâve been wearing this bracelet for a while now.â
She even waved it deliberately to show it to Leticia as if Leticia couldnât already see it.
Leticia, however, just ate quietly. It was then when Diana lost interest and turned away with a sour face.
Somehow, Leticia felt her throat burning, she took a sip of water and sighed.
âHe came to give Diana a present.â
She tried to pretend to be fine, but she couldnât help but have mixed feelings inside.
The reason Levion came to the mansion was not because of her, but because of Diana.
There was something else she was upset about.
âYou didnât celebrate my birthday. You said itâs a joke.â
They didnât get engaged because they loved each other, but they still spent some time together, so she thought there was at least a hint of affection and minimal interest.
But now, almost three years after they got engaged, Leticia was not so sure.
As Leticia continued to nibble, the Marquis asked Emil.
âEmil, how is life at the Academy these days? Are your preparations for the Imperial Civil Service going well?â
âYes, Iâm working hard, so trust me.â
Emil, the third son of the Leroy family, was smart to enter the academy, where only one in a hundred could get in, and the professors had high hopes for him.
Later, the Marquis asked his fourth son, Xavier, if he should become a member of the Imperial Knights, and gave his fifth daughter, Irene, a worried look, wondering if it would be too hard for her to study at the Academy of Magic.
ââ¦â
Watching the scene, Leticia tried to swallow a bitter smile.
The Marquis expressed his concerns for his children in a gentle voice, but he did not give Leticia even a single glance. It was as if he didnât need her.
She felt like she was alone again. No, it was the moment when she realized once again that she was alone all along.
âIâm sorry, but may I be excused? Iâm a little tired.â
Leticia asked cautiously, after all, she just couldnât get the food down her throat. The Marquis nodded insincerely and continued to whisper to the other children.
As soon as Leticia was out of the way, the Marquis called Diana as if he had been waiting for this moment.
âDiana.â
âYes, father.â
âWhat do you think of Young Master Elle?â
âBrother Levion?â
Diana didnât know what the Marquis intended to ask, and instead of replying, she tilted her head. Soon the Marquis said a bit more precisely.
âAs a marriage partner.â
âWhat?â
The family, who had been eating quietly, looked up at the Marquis in surprise.
âIâm going to talk to Marquis Elle about canceling the engagement between Leticia and Young Master Elle, and suggest an engagement with you.â
Seeing Diana touching her lips, unable to answer immediately, the Marquis asked again.
âWhat do you think?â
***
It had been a few days since then. Somehow, today was the only day Leticia felt strange.
âWhat is this uneasy feelingâ¦â
She couldnât figure out what caused it, so with the thought âitâs probably nothingâ in her mind, and left the room.
Today was the day she had promised to have tea time at Elleâs mansion with Levion.
Not wanting to ruin the pleasant mood, Leticia was determined to let go of the strange feelings. However, a short time later, she ran into Diana in the hallway. As soon as Diana saw Leticia, she frowned and asked,
âWhere are you going?â
âI have an appointment with brother Levion.â
âHaha.â
ââ¦?â
Diana quickly covered her mouth, but the laughter had already flown out. Then she nervously waved her hand as Leticia stared at her suspiciously.
âNo, itâs nothing.â
âWhat is it? Why are you laughing?â
âNothing, really.â
âNothing at all?â
Contrary to Dianaâs words, something felt strange.
The moment Leticia turned away, Diana walked up to her. Then she whispered quietly.
âI feel sorry for you.â
âWhatâ¦..?â
Before she could ask what the hell that meant, Dianaâs mouth twitched up in a grin.
âPlease have a good time.â
More than ever, Leticia was hardened at Dianaâs bright smile.
***
âWhat did she meanâ¦?â
On the way to Elleâs mansion, Dianaâs words lingered over and over in Leticiaâs ears.
It was as if that moment would be their last.
Leticia wondered for a long time what Dianaâs intention was in saying such a thing. But before she had time to think deeply about it, the horseman announced their arrival at Elleâs mansion.
Cautiously getting off the carriage, Leticia was led by the butler of the Elle mansion to the reception room.
Levion was already there waiting.
âItâs been a long time, hasnât it?â
âYes. How are you?â
âIâm always the same.â
Levion answered indifferently and took a sip of tea.
In fact, the moment she saw Levion, the words she was holding back came up to her throat.
âWhy did you only go to see Diana that day? Didnât you want to see me?â
She was disappointed, but she didnât want to ruin this moment that they were sharing together after a long time, so she deliberately kept her composure.
âBrother, is the training hard?â
Leticia asked with a worried look on her face, but Levion was still looking at Leticia with the same miserable look he had when they met in the training hall.
âYouâre still carefree, arenât you?â
âWhat?â
âDo you know what is being said at home?â
Leticiaâs expression hardened as Levion stared at her coldly.
She didnât know exactly what they said, but she could easily guess that it was not good.
âThereâs some talk going aroundâ¦â¦â¦.?â
Leticia asked, squeezing the hem of her dress in a somewhat anxious manner. A deep sigh came out of Levionâs mouth as he looked at Leticia indifferently.
âThey are talking about canceling our engagement.â
âWhat?â Leticia asked.
In disbelief, Leticia looked at Levion blankly. However, Levion laughed briefly and raised the corners of his mouth.
âYou really donât know anything, do you?â
Letishaâs mouth closed spontaneously at the sound of his voice, which was devoid of any emotion.
Levion was the only person who was able to help and comfort her among her family members who ignored her when her ability was never awakened.
At some point, she knew very well that Levion was not happy with her, but his indifferent attitude that he wouldnât care if the engagement was canceled made her eyes burn.
All she could do was to try her best to keep it from falling apart.
However, Levionâs eyes as he watched Leticia grew colder by the minute. Soon he sighed in frustration and got up. Then he walked past Leticia. No, he tried to walk past her.
âHow about brother?â
Her low voice stopped both of them in their tracks.
He turned around and his eyes met Leticiaâs, who was looking up at him with moist blue eyes.
âWhat do you want to do brother? Do you want to break up with me?â
Unlike her cautious appearance, her intention to ask was direct. Still, she was nervous and her lips quivered.
âItâs up to you.â
âWhat do you mean?â
At the pitying look that prompted him, Levion fell silent instead of replying.
At first he felt sorry for her looking like this and wanted to protect her. For a time, neither of them had awakened their abilities, and they were able to help each other.
But now, it was different. He was sick and tired of it.
âPlease donât say, âIâm not making any effortsâ.â
Leticia cried out and tears seemed to fall at any moment.
Nevertheless, Levion retaliated again.
âMaybe itâs better to break up.â
Even though he was facing Leticia, who was crumbling miserably in front of him, he did not falter. In fact, he turned away, as if he did not want to see her any longer.
âIâ¦.did I do something wrong?â
The unreachable words came incessantly to her mouth. She thought that nothing would change if her ability was not awakened. Not the relationship with her family, not the relationship with her fiancé.
However, she was foolish to realize just now that everything was wrong from the beginning. What she believed to be solid could easily become flimsy at any time.
The engagement was called off and she was the only one who didnât know.
Laughing bitterly and helplessly, Leticia slowly got up from her seat. It was obvious that the warm sun was shining down, but her body shivered like her mood.
Barely able to stand up and leave the parlor, Leticia climbed into the carriage that was already waiting at the main gate.
âBreak the engagementâ¦â¦break the engagementâ¦.â
On the way back to the Leroy residence, Leticia mumbled as she looked out the window.
It never occurred to her that her engagement would be canceled. She never expected that Levion would want to break up.
âWhyâ¦â¦â¦?â
Leticia gripped her hands tightly on her lap. She couldnât understand why there was such a sudden break-up.
However, she had some ideas. Because she didnât have the ability?
She was so frustrated by this fact that it made her eyes burn.
In order not to embarrass her family and her fiancé, Levion, Leticia looked for a way to awaken her ability. She went looking for rare books on abilities, and she tried in every direction, including looking for records of the Leroy familyâs abilities that were written down for generations.
But her efforts collapsed in vain like sandcastles on the waves.
âIâm like this, not because I want to.â
Eventually, Leticia buried her face in her lap to hold back her tears.
She felt more hurt thinking about her family than Levion, who wanted to break off the engagement.
At first, they were a close-knit family that had a difficult time with the economic situation, but they still took care of each other. She never doubted that they were happier later when the Marquisâs business was picked up.
But that was just her illusion, and as her siblingsâ abilities awakened, they began to change more and more. Her parentsâ discrimination and the neglect of her siblings.
It was heartbreaking when they stared at her coldly, but the sad part was that she was the one who got used to their eyes.
âLady, weâve arrived.â
At the sound of the horsemanâs voice, Leticia lifted her head from her knees. She tried to get off, but for some reason, her feet wouldnât move.
âMy whole family knew?â
The thought drove her crazy, and she wasnât confident to face her family.
Eventually, Leticia gave a shallow sigh and said to the horseman,
âExcuse me, but can we go to the square? There are some things I need to buy.â
âYes, My Lady.â
The carriage drove towards the square again.
There was nothing much to do in the square, but now she needed time to calm down those feelings that were raging inside her. Her mind, however, was filled with Levionâs words.
âIf itâs true that youâre trying to break up a marriageâ¦â¦â¦â¦.â
Her breath caught in her throat at the thought.
Leticia managed to compose herself and get her head around it again.
âLetâs just pretend I donât know first.â
She exhaled, clasping her hands together. But the anxiety wouldnât go away.
âBut what if my parents tell me they broke off the engagement first? What should I do then?â
The more she thought about it, the more she seemed to be trapped in a corner.
And yet, at this moment, there was nothing she could do.
âMy Lady, weâve reached the square.â
ââ¦â
âMy Lady?â
âOh, yes. Thank you.â
Leticia, who heard the horsemanâs voice a little later, came to her senses and got out of the carriage.
âIâll be back in an hour.â
âYou donât have a maid. Will you be okay?â
âIâll be okay.â
It was a place she had wandered many times before, alone.
Leticia went to the square after handing a single gold coin to the horseman as a sign that he should go somewhere to rest.
Many people were passing through the square. Children walking side by side taking their parentsâ hands, friends joking and laughing happily, and lovers gazing adorably at each otherâ¦
Walking alone in the midst of all these people, Leticia felt lonely. Whether she was in the mansion or elsewhere, there was still no one by her side.
âItâs the same after all these yearsâ¦â
Leticia smiled bitterly as she walked around the square. But instead of her spirits sinking, they seemed to be calming down.
It was then.
âOh, thatâsâ¦â
Leticia, who was looking at things sold on the street, stopped walking. In front of the store, people were playing a game where they had to throw a coin in a small target hole and get a prize if they won.
âCome on, come on. If you put it in that target, you get a bag of flour!â
Passersby were interested in the game and threw coins into the target, but they all missed. It seemed that the target was too far away and the hole was too small to succeed.
âThatâs a game I played before.â
Leticia, who was hovering in front of the target, stared at it and thought. It brought back memories of when she was with her brothers and sisters when she was little.
At that moment, a girl and a boy whispered to the tall man towering in front of Leticia.
âDid you hear that, brother? He says itâs a bag of flour. Do you have a single penny?â
âNo. Letâs go home.â
The man pulled his sisterâs arm but the girl didnât want to leave.
Leticia, who was watching them from behind, cautiously called out to them.
âYou can use thisâ¦.â
âHuh..?â
The moment their eyes met, Leticia stopped speaking in surprise. Perhaps it was the same for the other person, his dark gray eyes opened wide. It was Enoch. The man Leticia met once before.
But his sister, who knew nothing about it, looked at the small coin in Leticiaâs hand and asked,
âAre you sure we can use it?â
As soon as his sister tried to get the coin, Enoch stopped her. But his sister pushed Enoch away and got a coin from Leticia.
âThank you! Letâs go, Ian.â
âIâll give you half a bag of flour if I succeed.â
âIâm fine.â
Leticia waved her hand lightly, but the girl and the boy went ahead, saying they would do it.
Enoch, who was watching his siblings disappear quickly before he could catch them, let out a long sigh.
âIâm sorry, my brother and sister are still immature.â
âNo, theyâre very active and good looking.â
Leticia smiled at Enoch as she looked at Enochâs siblings.
âThey look alike.â
âYes. They are twins.â
âYou all seem very close.â
âThank you for tolerating us.â
Enoch, who was smiling awkwardly at Leticiaâs words, slowly held out his hand.
âIâm sorry Iâm late in greeting you. My name is Enoch Achilles.â
âMy name is Letisha Leroy.â
âYes. Yes, I remember you.â
Leticia was about to take Enochâs hand but looked up at him with her eyes wide open. She wondered how he remembered her when they only encountered each other once briefly.