Old Habits

BAMBI

He had killed them.

My mate had given the order that had turned a valley of roses into a graveyard.

~And because of that, my parents are dead.~

I sat on the edge of the bed in the guest room, staring at the rug beneath my feet.

Tears filled my eyes as I tried to fight the images, but they kept coming.

~A field of roses…~

~A bright, cloudless day…~

~Crimson blood splashing over the perfect fields, staining everything with death…~

I’d struggled most of my life to learn about my parents. Even Max couldn’t fill in the missing pieces of their sudden demise.

But my mate had been the commander of my parents’ squadron. And he’d known about it the entire time!

When we first kissed…

The first time we made love…

Our entire relationship was contaminated with Ekon’s toxic lies.

~If I hadn’t taken matters into my own hands, would he have ever told me the truth?~

Ekon loomed over me, unable to move since uttering his last words. He was frozen in shame, devastated by his revelation.

For the first time in our relationship, he’d actually broken down and told me the truth about secrets from his past…

And because of that, I wasn’t sure if I ever wanted to see him again.

Ekon stepped forward, unsure of what to do next. He reached out to try and touch me, but I jerked away and jumped from the bed.

“Stay back,” I warned. “Don’t touch me.”

“Bambi, please,” Ekon begged.

I shot toward the door and unlocked it quickly, stepping out into the hall before Ekon could stop me.

“I can explain!” he called out.

But I knew there was no explanation for his choices. And if there were, I would refuse to allow him the privilege.

I ran down the hall as he called after me, my name echoing off the walls.

EKON

I’d lost my mate.

As she sprinted out of the room, I not only felt her presence disappear—but her love too.

After all the things we’d been through…the battles we fought and won ~together~… It was all over. And it was because of me.

I walked the halls in silence, heading toward a destination I knew I shouldn’t visit.

Without encountering another soul, I entered my study and locked the door behind me.

The cabinet was unlocked, and within seconds my fingers had found my drink of choice…

I pulled the scotch from its shelf and poured my usual amount of two fingers’ worth…then I poured a little more.

“Hello, old friend.”

I tossed back the drink, draining the glass.

The taste was earthy and sharp, burning all the way down my throat until it settled in the pit of my stomach.

I hadn’t eaten dinner, and the alcohol settled in quickly.

The warmth had left my gut and was moving into my limbs. I licked my lips, gathering every last taste of scotch.

The events of the night had left me feeling depressed. But with just one drink, I was already starting to forget.

Just one more drink, and maybe my torment would fade away into the darkness…

I poured another three fingers and inhaled the scents of wood with a hint of peat.

Seconds later, the liquid was down my throat and warming me from the inside.

Tonight had been hell…but I was just getting started.

***

Familiar faces were floating past me, like ghosts freed of their supernatural bonds.

Some were smiling.

Some were frowning.

But every face that floated by eventually disappeared, unable to keep up with my pace.

~How could I see these faces? Is it possible I’ve regained my sight?~

I felt the chilly wind on my skin and reveled in the warmth that came from within my body.

The scotch had first picked me up…now, it felt like I was flying across my compound.

The bottle was still in my hands, but I wasn’t drinking.

At least, not at the moment…

I’d grown tired of drinking alone and had thought it might be fun to see who else would like to share in the excitement of the night.

“Alpha Ekon, what are you doing?” a voice called out.

I stopped and looked around, trying to pick up the direction of the voice. A hand grasped my arm, and I spun around, inhaling the scent of ~Ryland~.

“What are you doing here?” he asked. “Oh, Goddess…are you drunk?

I could see the shape of Ryland’s face floating before me, his eyes wide as he scanned my body.

“You’ve gone and finished an entire bottle of your best scotch,” he said sadly.

“No, I haven’t,” I stammered. “There’s more right here.”

I held up the bottle, but it was ~empty~. There wasn’t so much as a drop of scotch left inside.

“Oh, this isn’t my bottle,” I slurred. “My bottle was full.”

I stared at Ryland’s bewildered face but had to turn away as more and more heads popped up in front of me.

That’s odd…all the faces looked like ~Ryland~.

“Ekon?” another voice called out. “Are you shifting?”

Hunter Blackwell suddenly appeared out of thin air.

“Fucking cuntsniffer,” I scoffed.

“Damn, he’s fucking drunk,” Hunter replied, taking a step back.

~“You’re fucking drunk!”~ I said mockingly.

I pointed the bottle at Hunter, but it slipped from my grasp and shattered on the ground.

~Whoops…~

I bent down to pick up the shards of glass, but Ryland held me back. His fingers dug into my arms, trying to pull me away.

I threw him aside, growling at the top of my lungs.

“Don’t touch me!” I warned.

The warmth inside my body began to change…

It turned into a blazing heat coursing through my limbs, threatening to fully shift into my wolf form.

“Ekon!” Bambi screamed.

I searched for her face and realized there was a crowd.

~A large crowd…~

Nearly everyone from the compound had gathered around. And they were all looking at me.

“How could you?” Bambi’s voice asked, hurt and confused.

I locked eyes with her, and the entire night came streaming back through my memory.

Once again, I had failed my mate…

BAMBI

“Is he going to be alright?” Victoria asked.

We stood in Ekon’s room, staring at the large man passed out in bed.

“He’ll be fine,” I said. “I just hope he’s out for a while. I don’t want to deal with him anymore tonight.”

Victoria gave me a sympathetic smile before heading for the door.

“If you need anything else, don’t hesitate to let me know.”

I gave her a quick hug before she disappeared from the room, leaving me alone with Ekon.

While everyone had helped me carry the drunken fool to his room, I’d shown only thankfulness and a tired smile.

Now that we were alone, however, the smile was long gone.

In fact, I couldn’t imagine anything that could change the way I felt about the man lying before me…

I’d tried desperately to love him, despite his many problems. And the drinking was only one of them…

He had others, including an infuriating urge to hold onto secrets.

The wall of ice had finally melted away from Ekon’s conscience, allowing him to open up. And with just a few words, he’d created a rift that I wasn’t sure could be repaired.

His honesty had left my heart bleeding as if a knife had pierced it.

And I was beginning to loathe him for it.

Ekon groaned and muttered as he tossed beneath the sheets.

A grown man, reduced to the incoherent babbling of a child having a nightmare.

The only difference was Ekon had created this hellscape. And he had fueled the fire that had allowed it to burn on and on, refusing to die out.

I feared he would always be like this. Ekon could never change.

Relationships required commitment and sacrifice, two things I’d given plenty of during our time together.

Even though I loved him with all my heart, I couldn’t help but wonder, ~Would he ever overcome his dishonesty and lack of trust?~

ROSE

The last servant bid me goodnight before shutting the door to the drawing room.

I was alone.

And because of Ekon’s drunken behavior, it didn’t seem like I would be bothered by anyone else tonight.

~It’s a good thing he’s passed out drunk, because he wouldn’t like what I am about to do.~

I rolled back the sleeves of my sweater.

The tattoo was on Tyler’s wrist, in the exact same place it’d been on my earthly body.

~Some things never change…~

I touched the tattoo, and it began to glow.

An itch worked its way up my arm, leaving a burning sensation in its wake.

The itch turned into a hum, vibrating at the very core of my being.

Suddenly, the glow of the tattoo exploded into a blast of white light—brighter than the sun.

I closed my eyes and focused on the vibrations.

My mind was cleared of all distractions.

The only image I saw was Devina as a child, smiling and laughing. It was as if we were in the same room.

She was filled with radiant joy. And I used the energy from her happiness to reach out…

~“Daughter…we need to speak…”~

~“Come to me…let us mend what is broken.”~