Chapter 82

Chapter 82 I would kill anyone that tried to take our freedom.

The sky was still dark when Doris rose the next morning. She bundled up against the harsh temperatures and brought extra clothes and a cloak in a small bag. No one was awake when she stepped out of her cabin and treaded towards the woods behind her cabin. The absolute silence was strange. Only her steps that crunched in the snow made a sound and made her feel as if she was completely alone in the world. She supposed she was, in a way. Doris walked down a path she had taken many times before.

The air was still and calm, no sense of a storm was brewing but she wanted to make sure she stayed close to a path she knew well enough in case one came. Once she was far enough away from the camp, she broke off the trail and found a wide clearing between the tall trees. She set her bag down and stood in the center to look up at the sky. The sun was just barely starting to rise. The grey skies had a bit of blue and yellow mixed in. She inhaled the fresh air and felt her head almost spin from it all. She didn’t normally enjoy morning air, she preferred the smell of the night. “I know why you’re out here. You realize I can hear your conversations, right?” Cordelia spoke up in her mind. Doris almost flinched and looked around, but held herself firm enough not to make a fool out of herself again. She had to get used to this.

This voice was a part of her, as strange as it was to admit Doris laid out a small blanket and sat atop it with her legs crossed. Come to a compromise they told her. “I thought we could get to know each other a bit more.” Doris said out loud. “I already know everything about you and all of your desires. Even the ones you try to hide away.” Cordelia said with a laugh. Doris pressed her cold hands to her cheeks to prevent a blush. It didn’t matter if she knew everything about her. No one would be able to speak to her anyway. “Okay, then I came out here to learn about you. I’m new to all of this, I don’t know what it is I’m supposed to be doing.” Doris admitted. “That’s obvious. You can’t get away with acting clueless forever, my dear Doris. Sooner or later I’m going to call your bluff.” “I wish I was acting!” Doris huffed and closed her eyes. She wished she could see her as she spoke instead of staring at trees or darkness. It made her feel a bit crazy. “I know you want to be with your mate.” Doris said after a breath. “I know you want me to curl up to William and bow down to his needs, but it’s not like that.” Cordelia scoffed, the sound was loud and harsh against her ears. “It can be if you weren’t resisting so much. Our mates are made for us for a reason. If you let me be with mine, I would be more willing.” “I know you would.” Doris sighed and rubbed her head. Already a headache was forming. “Please understand that William and I are not a good match. He hates me tr more than you think. He hates the very idea of a mate and he refuses to end up with one_”

“If that was true, why did he seek you out so hard at the palace when that nasty maid took your place as his lady? He searched high and low just to find you and you still hide from him to this day. Do you think he likes knowing his mate despises him?” “I don’t know! I don’t think he knows why he searched for his mate so hard either, but I know that he doesn’t want this life. If you’re always watching and listening, you know how he acted after the kiss.” “Perhaps he was only that way because you didn’t kiss him back. You deserved it.” Cordelia hissed. “Maybe. I don’t know why he does anything, but I know how bad it hurt to have him spit at me as if I was disgusting to him.” Doris lowered her voice sadly and looked around. “No man is worth giving up freedom for. He could offer us the world but it would never be better than the choice of fresh air. We have to stop living for others, don’t you get that?” Cordelia was silent for a long time. Doris was sure she had curled up back inside herself to shut Doris out, until she heard a softer version of her voice. “I only want to be loved. I know my mate is waiting for me and I can hear his calls when you can’t. We long for each other.” “What can I do?” Doris asked helplessly. “I can’t change who William is. Please, tell me what would make you happy that doesn’t involve me selling myself away.” “I…

I want you to stop distancing yourself from him. I can hear your thoughts as they push further and further away from William. You convince yourself he hates you before he even opens his mouth. Give him a chance.” Doris parted her lips to object, but quickly clamped them shut. Her wolf was offering her a door and she would be stupid to deny it. Even though deep down, she knew it was ridiculous. “Okay. If I try to warm up to him a little, will you answer when I call for you? When I need you if I was in trouble? I don’t want to wait around to be saved anymore. I have you, we can save ourselves.” Silence. She could practically feel the wheels turning in her wolf’s mind. All the thoughts that must have been racing through her head to be willing to give up a sense of her power for Doris to have. “Yes.” Cordelia finally said. “You understand there’s no promises. don’t you? This potential love you want would be doomed from the start.

He’s a prince and I am only ever going to be a maid to him. I can’t force him to love me and I can’t force myself either.” Cordelia sniffed. “I wouldn’t sell yourself short. I have seen several princes turn their heads for you over the years.” Doris rolled her eyes and stood before she slid off her jacket and shoes.

With a shaky breath, she held out her arms. “I call to you, Cordelia.” Doris swore she heard a laugh before Cordelia took over every inch of her body all at once. She doubled over and watched in horror as her arms cracked from human arms to those of a wolf. White fur coated her legs and her back hunched over as her bones cracked until she formed into a wolf once again. The pain of every inch of her bending and breaking until she was transformed would never be something she could live with. It felt just as awful as the very first time. It felt as if her skin was stretched over her broken bones to form her into a new shape. Pure agony ripped through her throat. Once the transformation was complete, the pain faded almost instantly as if it was never there in the first place. She blinked and looked around through her sharp wolf eyes to see her clothes in shards all around her. She took a step in the cold snow and winced a little. “Don’t be so hesitant.” Cordelia whispered. “Let me show you how to be free.” Cordelia took off through the trees and Doris had no choice but to come along. Her paws beat down harshly in the snow and hopped over rocks and fallen trees without a second thought. The wind blew through her fur and left her feeling breathless as she raced against it. She felt… wild. Every inch of her wasn’t able to be touched, nothing could reach her or stop her. She felt free. She dodged the trees and raced against small animals that found her. They ran from her in fear, she only raced past them with a sense of determination. She could beat them all, she could run free. She raced up a small mountain as fast as she could. Faster and faster, nothing could slow her down. Nothing could Cordelia skid her to a halt at the cliff’s edge. Doris’s heart was running a million miles an hour as she tried to catch her breath. It was much easier to do in this form, almost as if it didn’t bother her at all. She looked down at the valley below her. White snow stretched on for miles and miles. The sun was raising up behind the trees at the perfect spot for her to appreciate.

“You want freedom, you will always have freedom in this form.” Cordelia said gently. “No one can hold us down. We are a force on our own and no one owns us.’ “I want to believe that.” Doris said. “You’ll see the truth in time. I would kill anyone that tried to take our freedom.” 1