Chapter 199

Chapter 199 Through the ashes “I wonder if he’s okay.” Doris said aloud as she paced his room. It looked as if it had been completely untouched since they left the palace. A light layer of dust even coated the tables. “He’s in deep pain inside, I can feel it.” Cordelia said. Doris rubbed her chest as if she could feel it too. There was always an uncomfortable feeling in her chest when she worried about William. Was it possible that she was feeling her mate’s pain? Did he feel her own when she was sad? 1 “I should have stayed with him—” “No, you respected his wishes and came here. He knows where you are when he’s ready to come face you.” Doris started a fire to warm his room and called for the guards to bring tea and sweets. There were few simple pleasures that always helped her feel better, she hoped it did the same for him. She was desperate for anything to make him happy. Doris opened his curtains and sat by his large window. The snowfall had lightened and she could see the signs of spring just around the corner. Finally the dreadful winter would end and soon a new season would bloom. With it, she hoped a new start would bloom as well. “Can you feel if his heart is breaking?” Doris whispered to her wolf. She knew they were alone, but she still felt the need to be as quiet as possible. “I can feel his wolf and I can feel his wolf’s sadness for William. He feels as if he can’t help him take away the pain of what’s to come.” “Does that mean his father is about to pass?” Doris stood and started to chew on her thumb. “What should I do? Should I go to him? No, no.

You’re right, he asked me to stay here and wait for him.” “I don’t know if it means that or not. He could be upset of the future or the past as well.” Cordelia stirred a little inside her. Doris turned and gripped the window to open it wide for fresh air. The wind blew her hair back and she closed her eyes to inhale the fresh scent of snow. Doris felt the sudden urge to let her wolf have control and run through the trees until all of her anxious thoughts left her. She wanted to feel the freedom of an empty mind and allow herself to be the wolf she was meant to be. Free, wild and brave. It felt like ages had passed since she was allowed to be a free wolf. The urge always came to her when her emotions wanted to drown her.

Instead, she closed the window and curled up on William’s bed. She stayed awake for hours and watched as the sun went down and the room darkened around her. Her mind kept her wide awake until the door creaked open with his arrival. Doris sat up instantly. “William?” He said nothing as he slowly crossed the room. Each step he removed a part of his clothing from his shoes down to his undergarments. He left it in a trail behind him and moved like a ghost through the room. “Is there anything I can get you? Do you want me to draw you a bath or have food brought?” She asked softly.

Again, she was met with more silence as he dressed himself for bed. She could see the shadow of him move across the room against the dark walls. It must have been well past midnight. Candles flickered and lit him up, allowing her to follow him around the room with her eyes.

The bed creaked when he sat on the edge. Doris crawled across the sheets and wrapped her arms around his neck from behind. When she kissed his cheek, her lips came away wet. He had been crying. .

“What happened?” Doris whispered. She wiped away any trace from his cheeks but more followed silently. Her heart shattered in her chest, she felt helpless to the one she loved the most. “He’s gone.” He said. He stared forward as if the words didn’t sound right. Doris almost didn’t believe them herself. “He passed away about half an hour ago. He had some royal officials come in to take the will before he died.

And then… that was it. He closed his eyes and he didn’t open them again.” William dropped his head. “I kept waiting for him to wake up and talk again. I had so much more to say and to ask him. But… I watched as his chest stopped moving. I saw the life drain from him in the matter of minutes. He didn’t open his eyes again.” “I’m so sorry, William. I’m so so sorry.” Doris held him tighter against her. He gripped onto her arms and closed his eyes as he fell back against her, pushing her right into his bed.

Calmly, she ran her fingers through his hair as he laid his head on her chest. Nothing she could possibly say would make the moment better for him, so she stayed silent and let him feel her love through touch.

“I wonder what I would have become if my father didn’t lie to me my whole life.” William whispered.

“Would I have been so cruel? Would I have made the reputation I have today? I wonder if the people would have loved me as they loved my brothers.” Doris looked down to see his eyes were still closed. “I wonder what I would have become if I knew I was the crown prince.” He continued, her shirt grew wet from his tears. “If my father had loved me like he claimed he always did instead of painting me as the black sheep in the family.” “What did he say about that?” Doris asked softly. “He said he was sorry and he knew that my mother would have hated him for how he treated me. He said it became the biggest regret in his life and he didn’t know how to fix it. So his solution was to keep on until he died.” William scoffed. “He loved you, William. In his own way he did. It will never excuse how he acted.” “Perhaps that’s the worst part. He loved me in his own sick way. I believe I wouldn’t have been this horrible if he didn’t make me this way.” “You’re not horrible, William. You’re rough and demanding-neither of those things make you a horrible person.” “I killed two of my brothers and poisoned the other. I believe that makes me more than horrible. I’m rotten to my core.” William sat up and leaned against the headboard.

Doris sat up as well. “I’m no better than he is. Even when I tried everything I could to be nothing like him.” Doris frowned. “Are you angry at him?” “I’m furious at him. He’s the reason everything is wrong in this kingdom and my life. He could have freed Martin from his responsibility and given me what I always wanted, but instead he forced us to become the worst versions of ourselves.” William curled his hands into fists. “I’m pissed that he died before any of the guilt could touch him. I’m pissed that he died before he could make up for any of it.” It hit Doris then. William was mad at all the things his father had done in his life, but he was mostly mad at his father for dying. Grief was starting to consume him and make all of his emotions fight for the spotlight before he could register any of them. His father was the sole reason for a lot of harm in the kingdom and in William’s life, but deep down -he still cared for his father. Just as he did for Martin. After a long beat of silence, Doris scooted closer to him. “I should have guessed that Sir Antony was your grandfather. It was quite obvious now that I think back.” William closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the headboard. “That old man hasn’t shown the least bit of interest in me my entire life. I wouldn’t consider him my grandfather beyond blood.”

Doris leaned her head on his shoulder. “They don’t deserve you. I wish you would see that the people that treated you this way didn’t deserve an ounce of your care anyway.” William swallowed. “What the hell am I supposed to do now?” “What do you mean? You’re going to be king. You’ve planned for this your entire life.” Doris said simply as if there was no room for question. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard of a new king with so many enemies. Half of the kingdom will fight this.”

“They can try.” Doris whispered. “But soon they will see that the greatest king in their lifetime has finally stepped up to the crown.”