chapter twenty five

k a m a s u t r a f o r y o u , e m i l y.

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Picture: their dresses.

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To say Emily was excited would be an understatement. Emily has trouble containing her emotions, so when she nearly peed herself with excitement today, I couldn't help but laugh. My best friend is the biggest dork.

I had told her about what happened with Tyler and me during homeroom, and she had screamed. I kid you not; she woke up the poor kid sleeping at the front of the room who was probably nursing a lethal hangover. According to the sand on the floor, and the mortified look on his face, his escapades last night had gotten the best of him.

Genevieve had given me the most victorious of smirks, while Eloise said she expected it. What I didn't expect though, was that I was getting envious glares from a bunch of other girls in every single one of my classes this morning. I guess I should've expected it though, it's not usual that you find out Tyler Bradford is dating a girl, let alone going to homecoming with her. See, Tyler had never been one for sappy things. I guess he and I were alike with that, because no way in hell will I drop that low.

While all my girlfriends were beyond happy for me, some of them surprised as all hell, my guy friends on the other hand – let's just say that they went a little ... crazy.

It was lunch time, and I had just told everyone that we were dating, since Tyler said he needed to go somewhere, not telling me anything about it. Not that most of them didn't know, though, because it was the talk of the school. 'Arch Nemesis' Are Now Dating Dafuq' was the title that sounded the most appropriate.

"Pay up," Clark slammed his hand down on the table, boring eyes into my poor brothers face with a smirk so satisfying it looked like he'd just discovered who 'A' off Pretty Little Liars is.

Austin groans loudly, "What? No! It couldn't have been three weeks already."

Those little bastards had bet on how long it would take until we got together. Apparently, Clark said three weeks, while Austin said one and a half. Glad to know my brother regards of me as a hormonal little bitch.

Well, girls do have hormones, but it's how we control them that matters.

Austin didn't end up so well. "You little asshole," I yelled as I grabbed his ear with my right hand. Austin hissed in pain, trying to swat my hands away but my hold was too tight. "Bet on my love life one more time and I will throw your Xbox out the window, and never cook you food every again!"

Austin's lip trembled, and he looked like he was about to cry, "Okay, okay! Let go of my f*cking ear you little b*tch."

I gasped, since when had Austin picked up bad language? Obviously not from me. Obviously... "Oh hell no," I grabbed his ear again, "That's five dollars in the swear jar and no Xbox for the next three days. I am your sister young man, you don't speak to me like that."

Meanwhile, all the guys were pissing themselves watching us. I do admit it would be a funny sight to see a tiny girl grabbing onto her brother's ear so hard it's as red as a tomato.

Austin finally manages to swat my hand away, his lip trembling and tears brimming in his eyes. "You hurt me," he says in a frail voice, showing off his puppy dog face. Bottom lip jutted out, eyes droopy and big eyes.

Oh f*ck, he's got me.

I nearly broke seeing the look on his face. "I'm sorry," I burst out, wrapping my arms around his neck to give him a bear hug. "No Xbox for only two days now."

"Thank god," Austin yelps as I let go of him, "It's so hard trying to act like your hugs are nice." He shudders. I punch him again.

Little butt.

"My hugs are awesome!" I defended myself, "Warm and big."

Austin snorts, "For one, your heart is as cold as ice, and secondly, your butt is as bony as a thousand knifes. So yes, sure, whatever you say."

I scoff. My hugs are the best. I'm just like Olaf – I give the best hugs, and I also like warm hugs. I do not have a cold heart. "At least I don't have to spend three hours a day in the gym trying to get abs, which are clearly non-existent."

"You little!" He screeches, ready to pounce on me.

I quickly shoot out of my seat, a flurry of giggles escaping my mouth as I sprinted around the cafeteria as quick as my legs could take me. Austin is fast, but he's nowhere near as quick as I am. Not to gloat or anything.

I dodge a girl with a food tray in her arms, but Austin manages to run straight into her. I stand back, gaping as I watch the girl stare down at her now ruined shirt. She had ordered the worst meal of the day – spaghetti with suspicious meatballs. I stayed clear from that, since I value not shitting and vomiting out of my nostrils.

Austin's eyes are wide, and he's repeating 'sorry' over and over again as if it would change anything. Heck, if it were me in the same position as the girl, I would have decked him before he could even say hippopotamus.

"Its fine," the girl sighs. She's surprisingly calm for having all her food splattered over her. "It didn't look that appetising anyway," she breaks out into a small smile.

She looks around Austin's age, and is definitely new. I know most kids in Austin's grade, but I had never seen her before. She's super pretty with long blonde hair and a short, curvy figure.

I watch Austin gulp; he obviously thinks she's pretty. I sneak away to give him some privacy. Usually, I am the epitome of an eavesdropper, but I didn't want to interrupt him just in case I mess something up or he starts blaming shit on me.

I'm halfway towards the table again, when I feel someone walking right behind me. I turn around, seeing Tyler there with a smile on his face and a familiar looking paper bag in his hand.

No.

No.

No.

He didn't.

"Oh my god!" I screech, jumping onto him, wrapping my arms around his neck and squealing loudly. Tyler holds onto my legs so I don't fall. His chest revibrates with laughter, and he has the most adorable smile on his face. "You know me too well."

"Hey, I'm just reliving the past," he shrugs, "Plus, what other way to get brownie points than to bring your girlfriend Taco Bell to school."

I quickly hop down, as nice as it was up there, because I was beyond ready for the tacos. Come at me, please. I love nuggets, but tacos are my one true love. I ogled at the bag in his hand, nearly drooling.

Tacos are practically orgasmic.

We walk back to the table together, me gushing about tacos while he attempts to trip me every few steps. Alas, we are the perfect couple.

Just as we are at the table, Tyler is off with the fairies, so I trip him in retaliation. He falls forward, a girlish scream erupting from his mouth as he collapses onto the floor. I had grabbed the tacos off him, because I wouldn't want them to get injured during the flight.

"I knew you were falling for me," I lean down and smirk at him. Tyler groans, a mess of limbs face first on the floor. He looks like one of those dead body signs which are painted on the floor, position and all.

"You're a bitch," he whines.

"But, I'm you're bitch," I smile proudly. He rolls his eyes, but plants a kiss on my cheek either way. The action doesn't go unnoticed by Clark, who screams loudly and like the complete and utter dork he is.

"My god!" He yelps, "PDA. No PDA! I am your fairy godfather okay, and I say no kissing, no hugging, no hand holding, and definitely no touching under any circumstances, or I'll have to cut all your limbs off and attach them to your head."

I blink. Once. Twice. Three times.

"You're fucked in the head," I say slowly, just so that Clark can wrap his head around my words.

"I think it's cute," Emily pouts, "They're a couple Clark; they kind of have to do couple-y things."

Clark scoffs, "Not in my book. No more condoms for you, Nova. I thought I could trust you," he wipes a non-existent tear from under his eye. "I'm blowing them up into balloons this afternoon."

I snort unladylike, "Of course. All five hundred odd. You have a problem, C lark. You're a hoarder. I think it's time you go to a therapist," I bite my lip just to add to the mood.

"Nooooooooo," Clark cries, falling onto his knees, "Not the therapist! Not my condoms!"

"I'm sorry Clark," I sigh, "But it needs to be done."

At this very moment, my life is perfect. I have an assbutt boyfriend who is actually pretty sweet sometimes, my three best friends, and a brother who says I'm the bane of his existence and I haven't failed any tests yet.

Yet.

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I should've known that I'd find myself back in this very same dress shop as I did last week, shopping for dresses for homecoming. Genevieve was running around like a headless chicken, snatching off dresses she thinks would suit Emily and me.

And I thought that Emily got excited.

Genevieve gently shoves a pile of dresses in each of our arms, a mound of satin, sequins and chiffon, and probably hundreds and hundreds of dollars. Emily goes into the change room first, a giddy smile on her face, while I take my time, leisurely undressing myself because I quite literally couldn't be fracked.

Too much effort to do things quickly nowadays, especially after my near-marathon racing Austin around the Cafeteria at lunch.

I didn't want to wear a long dress for homecoming, since I was saving that for when it was time for Prom. Plus, homecoming isn't as formal as prom, so I don't need to wear the floor length gowns which come with the bulging price tag.

The first of five was a simple yellow dress with a beaded bodice. It looked nice, but it definitely wouldn't be my favourite, judging by the looks of the other dresses. I step out of the change room, Emily already ready and waiting for me.

Emily has on a cream and black dress that puffs out from the waist and falls half way down her thighs. I shake my head, "That looks like something Allie or Destiny would wear."

"Yeah, I don't really like it either," she pokes the puffy fabric. "Your dress is OK. Not my favourite."

I shrug, at least I'm not the only one.

I've always believed in that 'love at first sight' with dresses concept. When you first put a dress on, and you know that it's the one. I guess Emily thought that as well, judging by the loud gasp followed by an ear ringing squeal that came from the stall next to me.

I tugged on the pink dress. It was a light, peach kind of pink, with a small sequin band around the waist. It was strapless and finished a few inches before my knees. I looked at in the mirror, gasping just like Emily did beforehand.

It was the one.

It may not show off my figure apart from my boobs, but it made my skin look impossibly tanner than it is. It looked nice against my long brown hair, and made my legs look longer than they are.

I walk out of the room, a bounce in my step. I do a twirl, squealing as I look at Emily. Emily's dress suits her perfectly. It shows off her body, being the tight body hugging dress it is. It's black with large gold stripes.

I wolf-whistled, "You're going to kill poor Nate wearing that."

Emily laughs, "He'll have a boner all night."

I gag, "I didn't want to know that." He's my best friend, and so is Emily. I really don't want to know about their sexual activities. I especially don't need to know about Nate's junk.

"I love your dress," she gushes, before yelling out to Genevieve who is over the other side of the room, "You are the dress guru Gen. All hail you. These dresses are perfect."

"Thanks, I know!" Gen being her usual cocky self. She had told us that she'd already picked out a dress, since her boyfriend needed to know what colour tie to get, and since she worked here, she could get the best dresses with a discount.

Emily and I both get undressed after gushing at the dresses in the mirror again like the kiddies we are. I slide back into my leggings and throw my shirt over my head haphazardly, putting my converse back on when I got out of the compact dressing room.

"Where to now?" I asked Emily, who had already gotten dressed back into her jeans and tank top which she has been wearing all day. My stomach grumbled, "Scratch that, I need to eat. I haven't eaten since like, one hour ago and I'm dying of starvation, can't you see?"

Emily rolls her eyes, "How about we go to Aurelia's for ice cream? I've been craving mint choc chip for a while now."

I nod, "Sure. As long as that cute guy is still working there and he fills my cone up with an extra scoop of cake batter for free."

Last time we went to Aurelia's there was a hot guy working there. He was around our age and from Halston High due to the fact that I hadn't seen him around. And trust me; I would know if I'd seen him around before. Plus, he always gives me an extra ice cream, so I love him for that. He's like, my favourite ice cream man. That doesn't even make sense.

I climb into Emily's run down car, cringing at the amount of shoes on the floor of the passenger side seat. "What is this car? A wardrobe?"

"Oops," she snickers, "You never know when you might need different shoes. It's the laws of fashion; your shoes always have to go with what you're wearing."

"Oh, right," I roll my eyes, "And I have the worst fashion sense, don't I?"

"Close," Emily smirks.

She's just lucky that she's my best friend.

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"Dammit," I pout as I look inside of Aurelia's, not a trace of that hot guy anywhere to be seen. Instead, it was a girl who looked like she was in college, with two braids and bright pink lipstick and at least a pack of gum in her mouth judging by the loud chews she is making. "This isn't fair! Like she's going to give me another scoop."

"You do have a boyfriend now, Nova," Emily points out.

Oh, shit. I've been single so long I've completely forgotten about him.

Ha, I'm kidding. Like I would forget about that sexy hunk of ass.

"And he's hotter than your average bear," I piss myself laughing at my own joke. Emily only shakes her head in disappointment, not finding my joke half as funny as I do.

I always thought that I would be the perfect clown. But...perhaps not.

"You're insufferable," Emily taps on the clear glass that surrounds the array of ice creams. Right in the middle, with a golden halo, sits the cake batter. I nearly cat call that sexy ice cream, but I'm pretty sure I'd look like an idiot.

But still, cake batter deserves the loving.

"I'll have a double scoop mint choc chip cone with sprinkles," Emily tells the girl who is incessantly chewing her bubble gum. "Make sure there are a lot of sprinkles. Actually can you put like two layers of sprinkles? And chocolate sauce over the top? And then more sprinkles? The more the better, thanks."

I gape at my best friend. Who knew Emily could be such a fatty.

"So that was a double scoop mint choc chip cone with two layers of sprinkles, a layer of chocolate and another layer of sprinkles," the girl recites it off the computer in front of her, "Right?"

Emily nods, and then pays for her expensive-ass ice cream cone.

The girl gestures me to take my order. "Can I please get a double scoop cake batter with nuts on top, thanks?"

I love my cake batter ice cream with chopped up nuts on the top. I don't know why, but they've always made the ice cream taste even better than it already is. Austin and I have a game of turning ice cream into savoury dishes. So, we'll have the cone, and then put things like tomato sauce, meat or vegetables in it. It tastes horrible, but it makes our afternoons even more fun than usual.

We get our ice creams, surprisingly they were packed full of ice cream. I smile at the girl, thanking her for her generous serving of cake batter ice cream, which is practically heaven.

"What's got you ordering that monster?" I eye Emily's huge ice cream as we walk out of the small shop. "That's like diabetes in a cone."

"Ugh," she grunts, "Don't even go there."

I bite my lip to hold back a laugh. When Emily is on her period, she goes crazy on food sprees. Like, this girl could eat a whole fridge and cupboard combined and not gain a pound on her period. I'm more of an emotional bitch on my monthly, hence why I call it the 'satanic waterfall'. Aunt Flow is a bitch.

"So how are you and Nate holding up?" I ask as we wander around the streets close by the beach. The sound of the waves crashing on the shore in the background, with the familiar smell of the water surrounding it. "I haven't really asked much about you guys. I'm sorry about that, it's just that I've been busy with you know who."

Emily smirks. "Oh I really do know who. And, it's fine girl. We've been really good together, and he's the best boyfriend I've had so far. Wow. Did I tell you that he is the best kisser? And oh my god. Best. Se*x. Ever."

I gag. I really don't need to know this, "No more details! Please, for god's sake, spare me of my ear virginity."

Emily shrugs with a laugh. "You're such a prude."

"No I'm not," I narrow my eyes at her.

I'm not? Am I?

"You're not that bad, you just haven't even thought about it," she laughs.

"I've never had to lately," I mumble. Because, it's true. I haven't had a boyfriend since Clark, and we all know that our relationship was downright hopeless. Hayden and I hadn't gone any further than kissing, thank god. I would rather eat poop than kiss him, now.

"Well, I hope I'll be the first to know when you start having head banging se*x with your sexy hunk of a man."

"You're such a horny girl," I snort, "I'm getting you the book 'Kama Sutra' for Christmas."

Emily's eyes widen, "Ooh, please. I've always wanted to read that."

It is official; my best friend is absolutely crazy.

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Sorry about the late-ass update! I've been super busy with schoolwork! Updates are going to be sparse, and probably only on weekends for now on, sorry guys! I'm just so jam packed with exams and homework and hobbies, I have no time for my favourite wattpadders! If you're wondering why there was stars everywhere, it was because wattpad said it was way too innapropriate and it wouldn't let me update because it was mature content -.-

I hope you like this chapter!

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120 comments

What did you think of their dresses?

Did you expect Emily to be such a 'horny bastard'? xD

Isn't Tyler so cute for bringing her tacos to school? Like, I want a boy who would do that for me!

Thanks for reading nuggachos, and until next time - peace out xoxoxo