Resentment

Kiarra

Watching Aidan give up broke my heart into a million pieces.

“Aidan, wait,” I pleaded, but he didn’t even look at me. None of them did.

They shifted and ran back toward the pack house, and I was left in tatters, standing with the Kendricks.

“Oh, my darling girl, we’re so sorry!” Rose gushed over me.

I felt dazed, like I was stuck in a nightmare without escape.

I didn’t know what to say as Rose tried to grab me in her arms and hug me.

I shook her off violently, “Get off me!”

She obliged but wasn’t as put off as I wanted her to be.

“Come and sit,” she said and gestured to the loveseat.

Melody walked over, a cup of hot tea in her hand, “Here, sister.”

I took her gesture, but there were no cute giggles or awkward questions this time. My heart was broken and shattered into a million pieces. No matter how hard I tried to fix the mess, it didn’t work; it kept getting worse.

These people were awfully quick to defend me. They didn’t even know me.

What were they really up to?

I was so confused; so many thoughts ran wild in my mind.

“You know, Kiarra, this is all a bit much,” James said, as he sat opposite me, “I understand the mate bond better than anyone, but…” his voice trailed off as I watched him shake his head.

I didn’t know what I had expected during the fight, but his support wasn’t it.

I wasn’t used to being defended that way, and I didn’t need it.

“I love Aidan; that won’t change!”

I felt the tears on my face.

Embarrassed, I wiped them away as fast as I could.

“It’s okay, kiddo,” he continued, “we all have a moment or two.”

“You know what? This is ridiculous! You all show up here uninvited and trample all over the one good thing I’ve ever had!”

“Sweetheart,” he tried to console.

“No! No fucking way! You don’t get shit about matebond or me, or what I have here with Aidan!” I screamed.

Suddenly the years of resentment had begun to flow freely.

I just wanted to be home with Aidan.

I felt his pain.

“We don’t want to tell you what to do,” Rose said as she patted my shoulder gently, “but maybe some time apart will help everyone get some perspective?”

“I’m not leaving him, Rose. I’m not leaving this pack.”

I had no other course of action. I needed to be blunt, and they needed to understand where I came from.

This pack was home.

“I respect Aidan. I know he comes off harsh, but he loves me, and he’s trying to do the right thing by me,” I continued.

James cleared his throat, but he kept his mouth shut.

Melody, however, didn’t, “An Alpha worth five scents doesn’t back down, sweetie. I’m sorry, but you found yourself a dud!”

“Melody!” James scowled, “You’re not helping!”

She shut up immediately. There must have been some parental cue I wasn’t privy to.

“What your sister is trying to say is that we’d love to have you in our lives, too,” Rose sighed.

She looked sad now, but I didn’t understand why.

It wasn’t like she knew what she was missing. For all she knew I was a real live wire and not worth all the trouble.

“If it’s inevitable that you’re marrying Aidan, then we will have to accept that,” she finished with a nod toward Melody, who remained quiet.

I could tell by the expression on her face that Melody didn’t buy it and didn’t support it.

I didn’t blame her; the first impression of Aidan hadn’t been very flattering.

“I think that you should leave, all of you.”

They looked at me confused until James said, “You’re not coming then?” He asked with a level of disappointment I didn’t expect.

“It’s better that I work this out with Aidan and then come. I can’t promise anything, I’m sorry, but in the meantime, I think it’s safer for everyone to go their own way.”

I spoke from my heart. I truly wanted some peace of mind. The only way to get it was to have the Kendricks leave peacefully.

“I’m not leaving, Kiarra, unless you leave with me.”

Melody’s statement was such a matter of fact it was hard to argue.

“It’s just not the right call. I’m sorry, I can’t risk any more of this shit!” I replied, feeling my temper brewing again.

The look on her face reminded me of myself.

I wasn’t easily moved on a decision once I’d made my mind up either.

She crossed her arms and sat down, “Kiarra, I’m not leaving without you.”

The loyalty she seemed to have for me was astonishing. But worse, it was weird.

My fight-or-flight response had been activated. I felt it rolling around violently in my stomach.

I needed to get out of here.

“Agreed,” James added, “Rose?”

“No question! We won’t move a muscle until we know you’re coming to visit.”

They weren’t getting it and I’d run out of steam. I needed to go. I needed my mate.

“I need to speak to Aidan; this is way more serious than I ever thought.”

“You go, dear, we’ll be right here,” James said as I made for the door.

Without another word, I crossed the door’s threshold. I didn’t want James’ comfort. They'd done nothing but blow my life to pieces. Even though I have a rule about never looking back, this time, I broke it.

Twenty steps or so out, I couldn’t have helped myself if I tried.

I turned around.

There they were, the three of them, standing in the doorway, watching me leave.

It was the creepiest thing I’d ever seen.

***

The walk to the pack house felt like torture.

Aidan and I have fought many times, but I’ve never been accosted by one of the members; I’ve never had a go at Angela.

I felt shitty for that.

~“Aidan?”~

~“I’m on my way back. Can we talk?”~

There was nothing—radio silence.

My stomach flipped.

What had I done? Was this the absolute end for us?

~“Please answer me, I’m sorry. About everything. I need to hear your voice, please.”~

I knew it would be rough, but part of me still expected Aidan would answer.

I closed in on the pack house but didn’t see him anywhere.

~“Aidan? I’m back, where are you? Please talk to me.”~

Still, there was no answer.

I was consumed with dread as I stepped inside the house. The territory was tranquil; I hadn’t expected to see anyone.

Suddenly, I heard a murmur of voices. It was coming from the back kitchen. I stopped to listen. I heard Aidan. I didn’t want to sneak around, but after what had happened, I didn’t want to interrupt.

Quietly, I entered the room. It was the four foes.

“Loyalty?” Jack said, “You’re not serious, Angela! She threw you under the bus so hard you must have bumped your head!”

I watched as Jack’s deep brown eyes flashed with fury. The room went quiet.

“I think we’re looking at this the wrong way,” Michelle said as she got up.

“What do you mean?” Aidan replied.

“I mean, Kiarra isn’t ~our~ pack wolf. I love her, Aidan, but at the end of the day, her parents aren’t wrong.”

Angela nodded. “She’s one of them, not one of us. Is that what you’re saying, Michelle?”

I couldn’t take any more. I knew they were pissed at me, but I never thought I’d walk in on something like this.

I had no words, so I just kept listening.

“She’s a risk to pack safety, Alpha. I hate to say it, but we need to make a choice, and so does she,” Jack said.

“Maybe we’re overthinking it,” added Angela, “maybe she’s just as crooked and sly as they are.”

I cleared my throat.

Suddenly, Angela’s eyes locked on mine.

I had run out of options; I could only do one thing.

~Run.~