24. Coward

Sky.

✙ ☠ ✙

"I'm worried about Chase." I say to Aron while we eat dinner.

"Don't be, he's just growing up."

"Do you really think so? Loren said he's acting too different and he's getting drunk and high all the time and he hasn't been here in ages!"

"Wasn't there a time when we did all those things?" Aron takes a bite of his risotto.

"Not without reason. Something's wrong. He almost broke down crying the other day, Aron."

"So what do you wanna do? Just force him to talk? You have to wait till he comes to you and he will."

"I hope so."

My phone starts ringing. I pick up.

"Hey mom."

"Hey sweetie!" My mom sounds super happy. She's probably with dad. "I have some exciting news!"

"You're not marrying him, are you?"

"No! Don't be crazy!" She laughs hysterically. I hate how happy she is because of that jerk.

"We're going on a trip!"

Here we go again with the trips.

"Oh really, how fun for you.." I say sarcastically.

Aron gives me a look.

"No, your father, Aron, you and me!"

"I'm not going anywhere with that guy."

"Sky, please."

"What kind of trip?" I sigh.

"He wants to show you where he's from! We're going to Tennessee!"

"The country? Oh we're gonna love that.." I roll my eyes.

"Please, it'll be a good chance to get to know him!"

I sigh.

"Tell him I'll teach him how to shoot a gun!" My dad yells from the other side of the phone.

"I don't wanna shoot a gun! And I can't go, I have a kid to raise." Lamest excuse ever.

"I already asked Di to take care of her while we're away this weekend!" My mom beams.

"Coming weekend?!"

"Pleaaaasseeee!"

Ugh.

"Okay." I sigh annoyed.

"This is going to be great! I just know it!" She hangs up.

"We're going to Tennessee this weekend." I say to Aron.

"You don't seem too enthusiastic."

"I don't wanna spend a whole weekend with my father in the country." I sigh and sit on Aron's lap. "At least you'll be there."

"Coming weekend..?"

I nod.

"Sky.. I have to finish an assignment this weekend.."

"No. You're not leaving me in the middle of nowhere with my deadbeat father!"

"I'm sorry, I just need to finish some things! College is really tough!"

"But we've barely spent time together lately. You're always doing school stuff."

"Well, you want me to be a good lawyer, don't you?"

Dammit. The world doesn't deserve him.

"I want you all to myself."

"Now don't be selfish."

"Alright, alright.." I sigh and I drown in his eyes.

He grabs my cheek and pulls me closer. We kiss slowly.

"I've missed you." I say against his lips.

"Well, let's make up for it, then."

× × ×

"This is the worst day of my life." I say as stand in front of my dad's old blue pickup truck.

We're supposed to leave today. My mom and dad are already making out.

"I don't wanna go..!" I say to Aron.

"It'll be good for you. You should at least get to know him."

"I already know him: he sucks."

"Sky.."

"Ugh.." I lean into Aron's chest. He caresses my back.

"It'll be fun."

"If you come I'll do anything you want." I look into his eyes.

"Anything huh?" He smirks. "I have been thinking about something.."

"Whatever it is, I'll do it!"

"Wow, eager to please. Very unlike you.." His eyes look mischievous. I wonder what he's thinking about.

"What is it?"

"Remember when I added myself to your contacts when we first met?"

"Sure."

"Remember what name I chose..? I want you to call me that." He's smirking as he says this.

I pull away. "You're seriously into that?" I whisper.

Aron shrugs. "Depends. Would you do it?" He looks so amused.

I swallow my vomit.

"I would." I say finally.

Aron smiles. "Prove it."

I look down at the floor in embarrassment. This is terrible.

Aron starts to laugh. "Look at you, you're blushing."

"Well, you're making me do this." I whine.

"I was just testing you. Look, there's really no way I can come. I have an assignment with a classmate due next week."

I sigh and lean against his chest again. "You're so mean.."

"Stop complaining, princess. It'll all be okay."

I groan.

"Sweetie we really have to leave now." My mom says from the car.

Aron grabs my chin and lifts my head up. "I'll call every day." He leans in and kisses me tenderly.

"Twice a day." I sigh as I walk towards the car.

I get in the back and look out the window.

I already miss Aron. Now I won't get to see him for a whole weekend and for what? So my dad and I can spend more time together before he dies? Which will be when exactly? This is so depressing.

I wave Aron goodbye as we drive off.

"Ain't this exciting? You're finally gonna get to meet your other family. We're staying at your grandpa Burt's house." My dad says, eyeing me through the rear view mirror.

"Very exciting.." I say sarcastically.

"Sweetie, you're gonna love it! Your grandfather owns a farm and he has horses!"

"So?"

"You love horses.."

"You mean when I was ten?"

I take off my shoes and put my feet up.

My dad turns on the radio. He starts blasting rock music at an obnoxiously loud volume.

"Are you trying to make me go deaf?!" I scream.

"It's rock! You can't play it softly, everyone knows that!"

This man is insane. He has no sense of responsibility whatsoever. I notice my mom is jamming right along with him.

I put in my headphones.

× × ×

It's a day later when I'm asleep on the backseat. We all took turns driving.

"Oliver. Oliver!" I feel someone shaking my foot.

I jerk it away and shoot up from the seat. "What?!"

My dad smiles softly. "We're here. Come say hi to your family." My dad walks on ahead.

"It's fucking cold here." I complain as I put on my shoes.

"This isn't LA, kid. Aah, I'm so excited. There's nothing like huntin' in the winter."

"How about lying in bed? Or dying." I mumble.

"Stop complaining... This'll be fun."

I sigh as I get out of the car.

"I thought Tennessee winters were supposed to be mild." I cross my bare arms.

"This is mild, you wimp." My dad gives me playful push.

I look up at the white, old wooden house in front of me.

I hear laughter from the open door.

I wish I could avoid this.

We enter the living room. There's a circle of people enjoying warm drinks, homemade cookies and cigarettes. Some are older, some kids.

The decoration is so dated. The creme colored tablecloth has flowers on it and the walls are covered in taxidermy. I guess you could say it has a cabin feel. It creeps me the fuck out, actually.

"Everyone, meet my son, Oliver!" My dad introduces me excitedly.

"Hi. I go by Sky." I glare at my dad.

Some of the older kids begin to whisper and giggle as they gawk at me.

Kill me. Kill me. Kill me.

Everyone else is just staring at me like I'm a foreign object.

"This is your grandma, Lila." Dad points to an old woman in a purple dress.

"And this is grandpa Burt." He smacks an old man on the back. He smiles at me. "This is your uncle Josh." They start play wrestling. I cringe.

"These are your cousins, Cassandra, Evie, Stevie, Lola and Nicky... Ooh, that's your other uncle Tom, your aunt Judy. These are just the neighborhood kids and.." Dad continues to introduce me to half the town it seems.

Here's what I've gathered: I have two uncles: Tom and Josh. One aunt: Judy. Too many cousins to count and I don't give a shit about any of this. Just because these people are related to my deadbeat dad doesn't mean that I have a connection with them.

"I think that was everyone.."

"You didn't introduce me!" Lila complains.

"Yes, I did, ma. I introduced you first."

"Oh.." She frowns.

"She's a bit forgetful but she's a real sweetheart."

I smile politely and sit next to my mom.

"Oh, Sky! We're so happy to see you again after so long! The last time I saw you you were a baby! Tell me about yourself!" Judy says excitedly.

"Um.. well-"

"Always so nosy! I'll show you your room first." My dad grabs my arm and pulls me out of the room.

"Ow! Would you stop dragging me around everywhere? I'm not a baby."

"I'm your dad. This is my job."

"You're so annoying."

We walk up the stairs.

"We're more alike than you think."

I shake my head. How would he know?

He opens the door to a little blue room.

"This is our room.." He opens another door inside the room. "It even has a little bathroom in there.."

"Hold on, our room? We're sharing a room?"

"Of course. Sonny-Daddy time, remember?"

"You're kidding!"

"Absolutely not." My dad smirks happily.

"You just love torturing me, don't you?'

"It does bring me a weird sense of accomplishment, yes." My dad nods in thought.

I roll my eyes and grab my phone. I sit down on the bed.

"Listen, we need to talk." My dad sits next to me.

I immediately feel suspicious. ".. Okay?" I put my phone down.

"Look, I know in LA it's normal to be this crazy, rainbow wearing, raging homosexual."

I snort. Yep. That's me. Rainbow wearing and all. I chuckle.

"But this is the country. Folks don't like that stuff up here. All that gay stuff is only gonna confuse people and make them think badly of you when I know that's not who you are."

About ten seconds into this talk and my dad's already managed to piss me off.

"What's not who I am?" I ask pointedly.

"You know, I know you're not one of those flaming ones, or whatever."

"And if I was? What would you do, disown me?"

"No! Sky, I'll accept you no matter what. I'm talking about other folks now."

"What are they gonna do when they know? Kill me?" I laugh.

"You would just be making things harder than they need to be, that's all."

"Look, I'm used to getting shit for being who I am so I don't care."

"Well, I do." My dad's voice is firm and hard. He looks to the other side of the room. That's when it all clicks.

"This isn't about me. It's about you, isn't it? You're ashamed cause your son is engaged to a man. That's it, right?"

Dad sighs. "Just don't parade it around, okay?" My dad says in a low voice.

I get up.

"You're such a coward."