47. Still Married

I reached to Ashar's office with Derek with a thought that I would scold him, but then I realized that my words didn't affect him even a bit. He had sworn to himself probably to piss me off till the end. I just didn't understand that it took him three years to tell me the truth. And what exactly he was thinking when he decided to accept his mistakes? What difference was it going to make?

Knocking the door for once, I stepped inside Ashar's office. Derek followed me. He was on call with someone. When he saw us, he gave us a light nod.

"No, no problem at all." He spoke to the person on call.

All of the scars from his face were now disappeared excluding the bandage on his forehead. I got worried a little, remembering the lockup incident.

"But, I can't let you know now. You send me the details. I'll go through them and will update you."

He turned his swivel chair to his side. I and Derek grabbed our chairs and sat at the other end of his office desk.

"Yeah, okay. Thanks." He ended the call and turned in our direction. I placed the file on his desk while Derek and he exchanged greetings.

"Are you going to the Benicio Kingley's wedding anniversary party?" Derek asked to him.

"Who is he?" Ashar looked at me and asked the question nonchalantly.

His aura of perfect personality never failed to influence me in ways I didn't want to think about. He was out of my reach. His words of that morning remained in my mind and I couldn't say that they didn't affect me. I thought that even for once, even for a short period of time Ashar saw me as a woman.

"I can't believe you're saying this. He's the renowned businessman and his name is in the list." Derek stated staggeringly.

He turned his head to me and quizzed, "Sanaya, do you remember him? He's our client."

"Yes, I've got the invitation." I answered.

He was a very cooperative client of iAdverts, unlike Ashar, indeed. Benicio was celebrating his twentieth wedding anniversary at his mansion and invited all the staff of iAdverts. I was planning to respond to his invitation and give my greetings to him.

"I've got the invitation too. Are you going?"

"Maybe" I shrugged.

"Ashar, you should go to the party and maintain the goodwill with him and then later on, sign the contract." Derek looked at Ashar and suggested him.

"He's right... It's a good opportunity." I agreed with him.

Ashar mused, "Hmm... In business world, you can't avoid such parties... Well then, you all should come too." He rested his arms on the table and leaned forward in my direction.

"We'll see." I muttered angrily.

The corners of his lips curved downward in reaction for a moment. Afterwards, he composed himself and pulled back in his chair. "Alright... please tell me the progress."

I began explaining, "The plan is we'll first have to stabilize that new gadget of course and for this we need to target big companies and persuade them to try this. Once the reputation will be build, we could target the common people easily..."

We discussed the plan for next fifteen minutes. Derek and I told him briefly about the work that was done so far. Ashar only nodded his head throughout that time. Afterwards, he snapped his fingers then pointed his index finger at us, "Okay, my next target is Benicio Kingsley."

"Yes." Derek responded.

"Okay then, thank you very much. You guys can take your leave."

Derek and I both rose on our feet, intending to leave. Ashar called my name, "No wait, Miss Frances."

I turned around and furrowed my brows.

"The list." His gaze moved to the file in front of him, "You didn't explain me the criteria. On what grounds you've selected the people in this list?"

My frown deepened. "How about if you stay a little longer here and explain me the plan on behalf of your teammates?" He pretended to ignore my glares and remained persisted.

I would not be so nice to him if any of my colleagues get the wrong idea about me and him.

"Okay, you stay here, I'll go ahead." Derek said to me.

"Sure."

After Derek stepped out of the room, I turned to Ashar. He flattened his lips, probably suppressing the happy smile. "What's your problem?" I snapped, "Are you a kid or what?"

He stood up from his chair and walked towards me, "You've left no choice for me. Why are you avoiding me?"

"Because I don't want to talk to you, not even want to look at you." I scowled.

He pursed his mouth, hurt dripping from his face, "I know you're angry with me, but at least take my calls. I get worried."

"Why? Why should I take your calls? Didn't I make myself clear that our relation is strictly business?"

"It can't be, Sanaya. We're married." He got irritated.

"Why are you keep saying that? I'm not your wife, is it hard to remember?" I exasperated.

"We're married just like we were three years back." He repeated nervously.

"I had signed the divorce papers."

"But they were never submitted to the court." He argued.

"What do you mean?"

"That means, you certainly signed them, but you should have made sure that were they submitted to the court or not."

"Come to the point, Ashar. Where are those papers?" I was getting restless now.

"They don't exist. I got rid of them as soon as I saw your signature on it."

I stared at him in blank amazement. The shock robbed all my power of speaking.

"This, what..." I trailed off.

"We're still in the same situation like we were years back. You thought you divorced me and left my house, but you're wrong. That's why I'm here.... to let you know that you still can't separate yourself from me." He explained.

I took a step back unknowingly. How could this be possible? All those years when I thought that I was freed from that unwanted marriage, I was not?

Ah, old and freaking memories!

Now that I recollected the memories of the past; me as a replaced bride, the marriage scam, Ashar's anger and then accidental pregnancy, I realized that so much time had passed that even the images also began fading from my mind. I had blocked all those hurtful and mortifying memories, but now when Ashar was talking about it, I could recall them and the lingering feelings that were linked to those times.

"That means, you didn't get married to Samara?" I muttered a question.

Exactly, Ashar was supposed to get married with Samara after our divorce. What was I missing?

He knitted his brows, "What? Did you really live all those years with that thought?"

I didn't respond and waited for him to answer my question. He stepped closer and grabbed my shoulders, "It's not true. I never considered marrying with Samara. Besides, how could I when I'm still legally married to you?" He spoke in a softer tone.

I was out of words. Too much information and too difficult to swallow all of it in a single day!

"I'm so sorry. I didn't know you were thinking like this. After you left the house, about two weeks later, I announced my divorce to Samara. We ended our fake marriage in front of the news media and then, Samara shifted abroad." He clarified remorsefully.

The strong feeling of shock gave me cold sweat. I stepped back. He put his arms down to his sides. I had never thought that way. I always imagined Ashar got married with Samara and would be living a good life without giving a thought to me.

"I...I should go now." I stuttered. Before he could respond, I hurried out of his office.

💙

I remained astounded the whole time. I thought I was no more tied into that accidental marriage, but I was wrong. All those years I was in the same confused marriage situation with him. And what about those divorce documents? Why Ashar didn't sign on them?

He was so impatient for the divorce. I gave him what he wanted, but he didn't accept it and I was not sure about his reasons behind his refusal. God, my mind would explode soon.

It was the weekend and I had decided to attend the Benicio's wedding anniversary party. I had planned to stay there only for an hour because of Zoya. I asked Carol to look after her and I would pick her up after the event.

I thought it would be rude to not to respond to Benicio's invitation that's why I planned to pay a quick visit there and then, went back to home.

I reached to the address of party's venue after dropping Zoya at Carol's home. I looked down to my knee-length, sea green, lace dress and straightened it. This short-sleeved dress I bought during summer sales. The fabric and color was so soft that I couldn't resist it. I arranged my chestnut hair, framing my face with them and stepped inside the house.

The party was grand and colorful. There seemed to be like hundreds of guests in posh clothes, gathered in the gigantic lounge of the Kingsley's mansion. Benicio Kingsley was very social and had a large friend circle. He had a reputation of being a friendly business tycoon and easy to work with. May be, that's why he had several good allies.

My eyes landed to the host of the party who was surrounded by people. Benicio was chattering and smiling at the group. His wife was standing beside him, looking happy and beautiful. I involuntarily smiled after seeing them and about to my move my foot towards them to greet them when Laila appeared before me.

"Hey, Sanaya. Look, Ashar is there." She raised her arm towards her right side.

My gaze followed her arm's direction and caught Ashar. He was in a warm brown, blazer suit, looking like a charming, rich, formal businessman. This time, instead of leaving his hair on forehead, he slicked them back that gave a full view of his face. He was standing with the group of people with his hands in his pockets and a perky smile on his face.

Back then, when I lived at his house, he rarely smiled. He always had an angry frown on his face, every time I saw him. Now I noticed that he smiled a lot. He kept on showing me his softer side and charming smile. There was no more anger or hatred for me in his blue, hypnotic eyes, but something else like; concern, hurt and... I don't know. I could not name it. I was confused about him. I had confused, mixed feelings for him.

"He's such a good looking man. I wonder if he's single or not." Laila commented.

It shouldn't be her business. I scoffed at her, "What if he is?"

"Who knows maybe I would get a chance. It would be a loss to ignore him." She giggled and kept on staring Ashar.

Her comment pissed me off. I didn't know she had secret admiration for Ashar. "Don't fall for good looks." I grumbled.

These days, women were so obsessed with looks. Inner personality should be a priority.

"Let's go and say hi." She grabbed my arm and tried to pull me.

I didn't move from my place, "You go ahead."

She shrugged, "Okay."

She walked to him and I stood at the same place, watched her moving forward. Ashar turned to her as soon as he saw her. She shyly smiled at him. To increase my irritation, she stepped close to him and hugged him.

My nostrils flared in fury. I puckered my lips. She seemed desperate. I crossed my arms on my chest angrily, trying to calm down myself. I thought Laila was a decent woman, but oh, I was so wrong. Ashar returned the hug, patting her back. Right, I forgot he was a pervert himself.

His gaze moved and caught me staring at him. I uncrossed my arms and pretended to look around. After few seconds, I stole a quick glimpse of them again. Ashar let go of her a moment later. They began chattering. Laila was still smiling coyly at him, talking to him. She was definitely trying her hand to impress him. And Ashar was probably enjoying her attention.

When my tolerance level reached to its limit, I turned around and began walking towards the exit of this house. I regretted coming here. My mood was now totally ruined. I tried to pass through the dance floor that was quite packed. Most of the guests were there, so it was difficult to move further without bumping into someone.

I struggled to pass through them and walked with a safe distance from people. When I moved another step forward, I felt a hand on my belly. Before I could react, in spur of moment, it moved to my side and spun me around. I got startled. My hands came in contact with a soft fabric.

"It's me." A crooked smile lingered on Ashar's face.

"What do you think you're doing?" I squirmed, trying to let go of his hold.

I was actually surprised to see him here. Just awhile ago he was with Laila, now he was here as if he followed me.

"I want to spend this evening with you."

"Cut the crap and get your hands off me. My colleagues could see us." I tried to push his arms away in a futile attempt.

He tightened his grip around me, pulling me close to him. His eyes were twinkling with humor, "If you don't want to give them doubts, dance with me normally. Otherwise, the way you're acting and struggling to free yourself will definitely give them something to gossip about tomorrow."

I narrowed my eyes at him and stopped wriggling. I looked around and noticed that no one in particular was watching us. Everyone was busy with their own activities.

"That's better." He grabbed my hand and moved it up to his shoulder.

He forced me to dance with him and I didn't protest because I knew he was not going to make this easy. He enjoyed every time I felt trapped. Our bodies swayed rhythmically with a slow music.

"I know you were missing me. So, here I'm with you." He raised my hand above my head and turned me around.

"You're so full of yourself." I faced him again, placing my hands on his shoulders.

"Then why were you glaring at me few minutes ago as if you were angry that I didn't greet you."

"I..." I stuttered and looked away from his face, "I wasn't."

"Sure, Baby." I glanced back at him and found a small smirk on his face.

"I told you not to call me that. I'm not your baby." I muttered.

"It's just come out of my mouth unknowingly."

"I know. I know your lame excuses. Still, I would appreciate it if you don't call me that."

He laughed. And the sound of his laugh took my breath away. For a moment, I felt like a naïve, emotional teenager I used to be; the teenager who was insanely in love with this man to the level that no logic could work on her.

I noticed that we had stopped dancing and just holding each other. I put my hands down to my sides quickly and he also did the same, giving me my space.

"Go there. Your female admirers would be waiting for you." I said sarcastically, pointing my arm where Laila was standing.

"Female admirers?" His face contorted in bemusement, "Are you jealous?"

I shook my head in disbelief, "You're impossible." I was never going to accept that not even to myself. Jealousy, my foot!

He moved his face closer to mine, lightly stroking my cheek with the back of his fingers, "Don't worry, Babe. I'm all yours. I can't even look at any other woman when my woman is looking so hot that I can't take my eyes off her."

My brows lifted up at his words and my breath hitched. I stared into his deep, gleaming orbs that were filled with warm emotions, making my legs go jelly.

He once again slipped his arm around my waist slowly, "So, am I allowed to dance with you?"

I quirked my brow, "Few minutes ago, you didn't ask for my consent. Why are you acting like a gentleman now?"

"Because, it's good to act like one sometimes." He quipped. I shook my head at his lame explanations.

"So?"

"Fine, but only if you'll act civil." I gave my approval to him.

If he was using his charms to melt away my anger, then damn, he was almost there. He...er...looked cute.

"Okay."

We danced in silence for a minute. I would be lying if I said I wasn't enjoying the silence. I enjoyed the music.

"Umm, you shouldn't apply lipstick." He said, looking at my mouth.

"What, why?" I asked in disbelief.

He leaned closer to my ear, brushed his cheek with mine, "Because it compels me to ruin it."

My heart skipped a beat.

Seriously heart, do you've to react at his every word? Don't fall for his charms. Don't put your guards down. I reminded myself mentally and tried to recall the reasons why I hated him in order to resist him.

He moved back his face and looked at me with a crooked smile, "Should I just do it?"

I moistened my lips involuntarily. His gaze again fell on to my mouth. I tried to step back weakly, but he didn't let me and kept his arms around me.

I was feeling mixed emotions right now; surprised by his behavior – his words, little bit sexually aroused, angry at him and at the same time, trying to stop my heart from doing something stupid, from repeating the same mistakes. I listened to my last feeling and resisted all the temptations and reminded myself that there was no way I was going to let him win this game.

"You said you'll act civil. Now, I'm going out of here. Leave me." I snapped at him and began wriggling in his arms.

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry." He leaned down and pulled me into a hug.

I froze. He rested his head on my shoulder, pressing himself more to me. "I'll just stay quiet and won't tease you anymore." He moved his hand against my back up and down in a slow pace that further weakened my heart. I fought the urge to wrap my arms around him and forget about everything else. His spell was working on me.

Momentarily I squeezed my eyes, gathered all my willpower and pulled back from him, "I really...should go now."

I didn't let him say anything and sprinted out of the place in a swift. Just outside the Kingsley's mansion, expensive cars were parked probably, belonged to the guests inside. I passed through them while experiencing a whirlwind of intense emotions. I wanted to burst into tears or maybe explode in anger, feeling smothered with all those mixed, confused feelings.

It was not easy to accept the fact that I was still married to him when I had spent more than three years thinking the contrary. And what could happen now? Was I really going to remain Ashar's wife for the rest of my life? What Ashar wanted?

"When are you going to stop running away from me?" I heard his voice.

I turned around and saw he was standing few steps away from me.

A group of men and women came out of the Kingsley's house, chattering to each other. Ashar and I both noticed them. I gave Ashar an exasperating look and wordlessly began walking in other direction. Ashar followed me, grabbed my arm and dragged me towards the array of parked cars. He hid me from those guests.

"Do I have to say it out loud? Don't you know what I'm trying to show you or you're just avoiding the truth."

"What...are you talking about?" I pulled back my hand from his hold.

He exhaled out a loud breathe, "Can't you understand why I'm following you around like a puppy? You already know that these office works, promotional campaign, hiring a team are just mere excuses. I can easily ask any of my employees to take this responsibility and then, get out of here."

My forehead wrinkled.

"I've been doing this to stay with you." He added.

"Why?" I quizzed.

He let out a hiss in irritation. He rubbed his temple nervously, avoiding my gaze. It seemed like there was something he wanted to say, but couldn't. I stood still wordlessly.

"It's because..." He tried to say, "Its because I'm in love with you."

I widened my eyes at him. Dumbfounded. A wave of shiver passed through my body, giving me cold sweat. My heart literally stopped at that moment.

"I can't change our past, but I can change our future. Let's give our marriage another chance, for us, for Zoya." He added on.

I composed my posture and responded flatly, "Our marriage happened mistakenly. We both never wanted it."

"Okay, I agree." He sighed, "What about now? I don't take it as a mistake anymore."

I couldn't believe his words. Was this even possible?

He came forward, took my cold hand in his. I winced slightly because he probably found out the effects of his words on me that was not good. I didn't want him to know how my heart reacted around him.

"I know I've taken too much time to say this to you. But, I was trapped in...some serious matters, so I couldn't come to you. I stopped our divorce because I didn't want to end this marriage."

He was here because he wanted to try this marriage. He didn't sign the divorce documents because he didn't want to end our accidental marriage, because he realized that he loved me. I just got to know his reasons for coming back here again in my life. I was overwhelmed.

"Then, why those papers were sent to me that day when you didn't want the divorce?" I inquired.

"I swear I didn't know about them." He explained, looking restless, "It wasn't me. Mom misunderstood that I wanted this so she gave it to you without even informing me."

I let go of his hold from my hand, fuming, "I thought the same. I spent years with that thought that you didn't want me in your life."

"I know how you feel-"

"No, you don't. You can't imagine the pain I've endured because of you." I interrupted him, "You're still the same, Ashar, still so selfish. Back then, when I needed you, you weren't there. Now, you realized that you need me you're here to annoy me. Can you bring back my precious time? Can you undo the humiliating feelings, those sleepless nights, those tears that I shed because of you?"

The remorse was flaring in his eyes.

"I think you just feel obliged to keep us together because of our daughter, right? I told you several times I won't demand anything from you. You and your family wanted Zoya, I gave....her to you. I'll keep my wo-rds. Just take care of her." I spluttered.

"That's not true, Sanaya. I'm not saying all this only because of Zoya." He quickly said in a defensive manner.

"Then, what else? Don't tell me you actually fell for me or what?" I chuckled. It was fake.

He stepped closer and placed his hand on the side of my neck, bringing his face close to mine, "Damn you, woman." He breathed against the corner of my mouth, "I just said I love you. You heard me. Give me a chance to show you my heart."

The tiny hair on my body stood up not sure because of his words or his nearness. He began nuzzling his lips on my cheek, moving towards the corner of my mouth. My stomach twisted in response and I found myself fisting the soft fabric on his forearm.

"Let me show you that I regret what I did to you. I didn't mean to do any of this, the circumstances forced me." He said in a slow, throaty voice.

His lips slowly brushed my jawline. My heart began to flutter, yearning for him. Why he does  have to be good in everything as if he did a full research on how to soften a woman's heart and now he was using all those techniques on me.

He rubbed his nose softly on my cheek and whispered against my skin, "I'm sorry. I'll keep saying this to you. I'll repeat those words every day and will show you how sorry I am, to put you in anguish."

"Ashar..." My voice was filled with fear, hesitation.

A weak smile touched the corners of his lips as he looked at me with twinkled eyes as if he understood my turbulence. He brought his face closer to mine and kissed my forehead gently, "Take your time."

He stepped back. I gazed at him in utter disbelief. He didn't mind my refusal. I liked it how he always gave me some space whenever he felt like I was being uncomfortable. He didn't show dominance or authority on me. I guess this was his way to apologize to me or show me that he would annoy me, irritate me, but won't force me to accept his decision.

He further stepped back and created a considerable distance between us. I felt empty and vulnerable as soon as he broke the physical contact with me. The quietness of balmy night surrounded us as we both just stood on our spots in an awkward silence.

"I should go then." He mumbled, breaking the silence.

I sucked in my jaws a little and gave him a slight nod.