18. The Doubts

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Everyone assumed implausible things about me without giving me a single chance to defend my actions. I felt so obnoxious towards Hobsons's inhumane and hostile behavior to me that I wanted to just pull my hair and let out frustrated screams. Even the convicted criminal get a chance to defend his crime, but this family didn't give me this right. I was victimized by their prejudicial nature. I knew I made a big mistake by fooling them and lying to them, but I really didn't hold any personal grudge against them.

Gasping exasperatingly, I got out from my small bed. It was Melanie's room that was located in the staff's quarter where the family had given rooms to their domestic workers. The room was not very big, but it could be suffice for two of us. I now slept here comfortably because my conscience was somehow at peace due to not accepting that room that Hobsons offered.

I had lived a boring life, but I swear I was never bored like I felt now days because I couldn't go out and get some fresh air, meet my friends, use social media or any other activity that could give me a break from this family. My routine in this mansion was like cooking three meals a day, eat and then sleep, waking up next morning and following the same routine. The dullness, loneliness and overthinking were really giving me a hard time.

With these thoughts, I ascended the stairs and went to the dining area to perform my duties as a home cook here. The staff's quarter was in the basement of this mansion where usually no family member stopped by.

I halted my walking when I saw Ashar was coming forward from the opposite direction. He stopped walking as well when his eyes met with mine. Cold perspiration began to appear on my forehead as I recalled his anger of that night when he stormed into my apartment. It was the first time we came face to face since I had shifted to his house.

His jaws tightened and V formed between his brows as he scowled at me. I started playing with my fingers in nervousness. I noticed his angry gaze moved to my arm where his eyes flashed something, something akin to suppressed penitence. I felt confused so I also looked at my arm and understood what he was looking at. The scar of my bruise – the bruise I got because of him.

Although, the contusion was now completely healed, but it left the faded scar that would disappear probably after sometime. I hid it with my hand that made him look up at me again. He masked his expressions and again looked at me with constricted jaws.

Breaking the eye contact, he ignored me and walked past me. I turned around and said in a brittle voice, "Hey, listen."

He stopped, but didn't move around. I trotted forward and faced him, "How, how are you doing?"

I knew he was in no mood to converse with me. I knew I was going to receive hurtful taunts in reply, but I couldn't just sit at some corner of the house and don't do anything to make things better.

He turned his head and gave me a disgruntled glance, "Look at you...still so shameless. You would've been enjoying your time here right? After all, you don't have to live in that shabby, four-walled apartment."

My lips trembled as I found myself at the brink of tears, "It's not true." I barely whispered. His brows raised in disbelief.

"Don't leave your house because of me. I won't come in front of you if that would make you comfortable."

"Don't give yourself so much importance." He grumbled and walked away.

Squeezing my eyes shut, I tried to suppress my own woe and thought of following him. He couldn't just avoid talking to me. I wanted to get out of here. "Ashar, wait." I yelled as I also stepped out in the parking lot of the mansion.

He didn't listen to me and continued walking swiftly towards his car. He took out the electric remote from his pocket and unlocked his vehicle. I increased my speed and caught his arm when he was about to open his car's door. "Listen to me please. Don't think of me as a bad person. I can understand your anger for m-"

"Go away." He moved his head in my direction. His face was flickering sadness and anger simultaneously. My heart contracted. Indeed he would be in pain too. He did not only go through this accidental marriage with me, but at the same time, he also found out that his soon-to-be wife cheated on him. Samara's betrayal would have left him dismayed. He also had too much to swallow and survive with the truth.

He pulled opened his car's door. I put my hand on it to not to let it open further, "No, we can't jus-"

"I told you to go away." He hollered and pushed me back. I winced.

"Don't test my patience, Sanaya." He snapped, clenching his fists tightly to the extent that his knuckles turned white, "I won't be responsible for the outcome then."

He sat in his car and drove away. My heart crumpled after noticing so much hatred for me in his eyes. He was not ready to have a decent conversation with me. Unless he won't he change his opinion about me, we couldn't be free from this marriage.

Ashar was being selfish. He was only thinking about his own pain and not considering mine.

💙

Later in evening, Melanie informed me that there was an important guest sitting in the living room with Matt and Ashar. She asked me to prepare few snacks immediately. I did what I was told. I transferred the cookies and sandwiches in to separate plates and set up the tray.

Melanie entered into the kitchen, "Sanaya, you're the best. I'm so exhausted with all the work. Thank you for being here."

I smiled and handed over the tray to her. She pushed it back to me, "You go and put that in the living room. I'll come with their drinks."

She moved towards the cold storage and took the cold drinks from there. "No." I blurted out, "I can't do this."

"Why? Please help me or Matt will go crazy."

"But-"

She huffed and scurried to me. "Go Sanaya. You're wasting time." She shoved me forward and yelled, "I'll be following you."

Ugh. Matt and Ashar both would go mad if they saw me there, but I could not tell Melanie about this. I already had a fretful encounter with Ashar today and it was enough for a day. I could not bear another round of tantrums from him or any of the family members. It was not easy to tolerate it silently when you know you don't deserve to hear them.

I took miniature steps towards the living room. Melanie had put me in such a peculiar situation. Lowering my head, I hurried inside the room in order to not to look at anyone, but still my eyes stole quick glimpses of the people who were sitting there. There was Ashar, his father and two old men.

I placed the tray on the table quickly and sprinted out of the room. "Did you find out about the power cut issue at Ashar's wedding?" I heard one of the two old men quizzed. My feet glued to the ground.

"It was a strange thing." The same voice added on.

Matt chortled, "It was just a technical problem, nothing else."

That man remained persistent, "Didn't you check this prior the event?"

I stayed there to further listen to the conversation, feeling shivered. Hobsons were going to kill me if someone would find out the truth about this marriage.

"It's such a nuisance. You should complain to the authority." The other man commented.

Matt responded, "I did complain them."

"Still, I find it strange. By the way, where's the new bride? The newly married couple should be spending a lot of time together."

I saw Melanie came from the other direction with drinks, "Just go from here now." She whispered. Submissively, I nodded and walked away from the room.

I wanted to hear more of their conversation. I wasn't getting a good feeling after hearing that man as if he had some doubts about the wedding.

After almost twenty minutes, I heard the sound of glass shattering. I got startled and ran towards the dining hall. Melanie was standing there. I scurried to her and stood beside her. "What happened?" I inquired.

She shook her head, "Don't know, but Ashar seems angry."

"Dad, I don't think I can bear this anymore. Just put an end to this shit, otherwise I'll go crazy and do it in my way." I heard Ashar yelled from the living room.

My heart clutched in my rib cage. Melanie looked at me, whispering in my ear, "The guest was the investor and I think that he withdrew from some contract and I'm not sure about the reason."

"Oh." I tried to sound surprised.

"Your father is trying to find a solution to this. You need to be patient, my son. Attend his son's engagement party with Samara and act as a happy married couple in front of the crowd. His doubt would fade away like that." This time, I heard the female voice, probably she was Ashar's mother.

"See? I told you." Melanie said, "There is something going on between Samara and Ashar. I think the problem is very serious."

If she continued listening to the conversation, she would soon be able to solve the puzzle. And then, Matt would blame me for that. I could not take a risk. "I think we should go from here before anyone would see us." I suggested.

"Yeah, you're right." She agreed.

It was horrifying to imagine what would happen if the truth would come out that Ashar and Samara weren't married.

"If this man turns down our offer because of his doubts about my marriage, then, God help me because this time Samara has to pay the price." Ashar threatened.

I tried to hide my fear from Melanie and started walking away from there, but then I stopped when I saw Ashar came out of the room furiously and trotted out of the house.

💙

Next afternoon, Aaron returned my phone for few minutes saying Carol was calling me since last night. I took a pause from my kitchen duties and called her back. She picked up my call after three rings.

"Hey, what's up?"

"Where the hell are you, Sanaya? These days you don't answer my calls." She shouted, "You're not even active on your social media accounts. What's with you?"

"I'm, I'm just busy." I lied, scratching the back of my head.

She chortled, "Busy to the extent that you can't meet your friend to say goodbye to her."

"What do you mean?"

Aaron entered in to the kitchen and stood there at some distance to listen to my conversation. I sighed aloud in fury. All of them were just wasting their time and energy by keeping an eye on me. I was harmless.

"I'm leaving for California by tonight. Did you forget?" Carol explained. I turned myself the other way, trying to avoid Aaron's bothersome presence.

"Two weeks has passed already?"

"My God, Sanaya. You're making me worried. You shouldn't stress yourself this much due to some stupid job. Get some rest."

Ah! Only if she knew about what I'd been going through nowadays! "I'll try. Don't worry about me."

"I'm shifting to California tomorrow." She repeated.

I guess I had to see off my only friend on call. Due to yesterday's event, the environment was pretty tensed here in this house. I didn't want to take a risk and ask their permission and then get insulted once again for no reason. "Okay, you go and have fun."

"You're not going to come and meet me?"

"I can't. I'm sorry." I said in hesitation.

"I can't believe this. I wanted to meet you and say thanks to you for giving me so many good memories. It's sad to leave old friends behind."

Carol and I had a really good time at school. During last weeks of my high school, she spent all her free time with me. We grew fond of each other. Now this separation was giving me a heavy heart. I wish I could've met her and say a proper goodbye to her when I was not sure that would I be able to see her again or not.

Feeling downhearted, I turned around and saw Aaron was still standing there, looking at me. My face contorted in annoyance, "It's okay, Carol. Good luck for your college and don't worry, we'll remain in touch."

"I'll be missing your company, Sanaya. Please take care of yourself and you can contact me anytime." Her voice sounded shaky.

"Okay. Take care and study hard." I ended the call and return my phone to Aaron.

Talking with Carol reminded me that I was really graduated from my high school and it was now time to move on and start a new chapter of life. Well, I had already started a new chapter – I got married.