Chapter Twenty.

Chapter Twenty.

I opened my eyes to be greeted by the sight of Logan in the form of his wolf. He stood proudly above me, his black fur gently ruffling in the gentle breeze and his large chocolate brown eyes were looking down at me with nothing be relief.

I was no longer afraid of Logan in this other form as once I had accepted Logan I knew that I had also accepted his wolf. At the sight of Logan's wolf in front of me something inside of me seemed to come alive and all I wanted to do was jump to my feet and have Logan wrap his arms around me. I wanted Logan more than I had wanted him before; it was as if I no longer had any self-restraint toward my feelings for him or my actions.

I continued to stare at Logan as if he had become the eighth wonder of the world. Logan stepped forward, his strides powerful and confident as he dipped his head and nuzzled my neck. His touch sent my whole being into some sort of frenzy as a shudder ran through my entire body coming alight in a blaze of tingles. A low growl rumbled in Logan's chest and I knew that his body was having the same reaction as mine when we touched.

"Logan?" I tried to talk but all that could be heard was a high pitched bark.

I moved my head so that I could look around and noticed that we were circled by many pack members all of them looked as if they were holding their breaths, waiting for something to happen although I was unsure what. I noticed my mum stood with Sam, her cheeks were pale and wet with what looked like tears. A whine could be heard and I knew that it had come from me.

"Esme," Logan's voice sounded from inside my head and I turned so that I was looking at him again. "When I marked you my saliva must have activated your dormant werewolf gene causing your body to shut down while it prepared you for first shift."

"You mean?" I replied, forcing myself to calm down so that I wouldn't panic.

It was impossible that I could have shifted into a wolf as I was under the impression that if it was going to happen, it would have done a long time ago. Logan must have been imagining things as it was the only explanation as to why he thought that I had turned into a wolf.

All I could remember was the pain that had consumed my entire being for what had felt like weeks. I didn't know what had happened as the last thing I remember I was waking up feeling hot and my eyesight blurry. I didn't feel any pain now and I knew that from the intensity of the pain I recently experienced I should have been aching all over and still in pain but I felt fine.

It was now that I looked around noticing how everything seemed sharper, more defined. It was as if I was seeing everything in a different light. My ears twitched at the sound of birds flapping their wings from what seemed like right next to me but I knew from when I had looked around that there were no birds around.

"Esme you've shifted into the most beautiful wolf I have ever seen." Logan's voice floated into my mind once again as he nuzzled his head into the crook of my neck causing something inside of me to stir excitedly once more.

I moved my head away from Logan's so that I could look down at my body. Instead of hands I saw paws that were covered in a glossy brown fur, my legs and arms were also covered in the same brown fur. I twisted my body so that I could see myself and saw that Logan was right. I should have seen pale pink flesh with hands and feet but all I saw was the body of a brown covered wolf lying on the grass.

"Impossible." My own voice sounded panicked as I began to move, trying to get to my feet.

My body didn't feel like my own, it felt too small and my movements were restricted. It felt unreal, as if it was all a horrible dream and I would soon wake up next to Logan who would tell me that it was just a dream and that everything would be okay. I knew deep down that I was hoping for something that wouldn't happen, that Logan was telling the truth.

"Calm down Esme," Logan's voice was soothing and whatever was inside of me listened instantly and my body stopped wiggling on its own accord.

As if Logan noticed my sudden confusion and panic he quickly explained, "Your wolf recognises me as your mate and so she knows that we will never hurt her, she feels safe and only wants you to feel safe, she's accepted you and all you need to do is accept her."

"My wolf?" I questioned, my voice sounded high pitched and scared.

"Your wolf, she's the presence that you feel within you," Logan confirmed, "right now you are pushing her away, just relax and let her in, feel her in your mind and your body, let her become one with you rather than two separated beings trying to share one body."

"I can't." I protested loudly, as I began to wiggle around again trying to get to my feet but my body wasn't cooperating with me and I was sure that I looked like a dog rubbing itself on the grass marking its scent.

Logan suddenly lunged at me, his entire body hovering over mine as his head dipped so that he could look me directly in the eyes. I could see my own eyes reflecting in his chocolate brown ones and I was surprised to see how green my eyes had turned as they contrasted with the brown fur of my wolf. The belly of Logan's wolf rubbed against my own as I found myself on my back.

"Esme you need to listen to me." Logan spoke evenly and firmly as I was drawn in by his voice once again, controlled by whatever was within me. I could see what Logan meant about two beings sharing one body, it was confusing and conflicting.

"Relax," he instructed, there was an underlying tone to his voice that told me it was also an order which I shouldn't disobey, my body stilled underneath his, "let her in."

My eyes closed on their own accord and my breathing evened out, my muscles were relaxed and I was limp underneath Logan. At first I felt nothing and although I wasn't sure what I should expect I was sure that it wasn't nothing.

A tingling sensation began within me, starting at the tips of all four of my paws, it wasn't painful more uncomfortable as I was very aware of it. It began to make its way up my legs, slowly stretching into my muscles before moving its way through my body until I was almost overwhelmed. Just as quickly as it came it left and suddenly I felt lighter. I hadn't noticed it until now but a slight pressure had been pushing on my temples and had suddenly gone.

I could feel a presence in the back of my mind but it was under control. I no longer felt as if I was split in two but rather I had come together with the wolf inside of me. I was suddenly angry that Logan had ordered me to do something against my will, it didn't matter that he had ordered me to accept my wolf as I knew that it would have happened sooner or later.

"You ordered me." I accused him; the hurt could easily be detected in my voice even through the mind link. It was easy to communicate through the mind link; it was second nature, just like walking and talking.

A growl escaped my muzzle as I began to use my paws to push against Logan's under belly. I could feel Logan tense above me with surprise as he slowly backed up and off of me. I was now one with my wolf and no longer were we fighting against each other for control. I was easily able to roll onto my belly and using the new strength I found from the bond with my wolf I was able to stand on my legs. At first my legs shook and I almost toppled over if it wasn't for Logan who had grabbed the loose skin on the back of my neck between his teeth.

"Easy." Logan warned me as he slowly released my neck from his jaws.

"I can do this." I huffed although we both know that I couldn't do it on my own.

Logan didn't say anything probably feeling my anger and hurt through the mind link. The group around us began to slowly back away and others walked away probably being order to by Logan who stood silently behind me; standing ready in case I would start to fall again so that he could catch me. Once we were alone I turned unsteadily on my feet and towards the forest.

"Esme, I'm sorry I just wanted you to relax and calm down." Logan apologised in my head as I took a step forward slowly.

I could already feel myself give into Logan and the anger I had felt moments ago was quickly disappearing. My limbs were strengthening with each step and soon I was able to walk steadily on all fours. It was a strange sensation and despite my earlier panic and rejection to what I had become, I suddenly felt free and began to enjoy the wolf side of me more with each step I took.

Logan followed behind me with every stride I took. I was beginning to grow more confident with each step and as I reached the forest line surrounding the garden I began jogging through the trees and bushes. I enjoyed the way the wind felt through my fur as I picked up my pace, surprising myself when I let out a joyful yelp which was echoed by a bark from Logan behind me.

My body was agile and easily dodged through the trees and bushes. I leapt over tree roots and fallen down logs with ease, my body felt as though it was flying through the air even though my feet couldn't have been off of the ground for more than five seconds. It was strange feeling to finally feel as though I was free and it was one that I enjoyed very much.

If I had been told that once Logan marked me I would transform into a wolf I would have never willingly let him sink his teeth into my neck. When I had first woken up and found out that I was now a wolf I was adamant that it was a dream, I didn't want to turn into a monster like my father, but as I had become one with my wolf and now, as I ran through the woods, I had never felt anything more satisfying.

A startled yelp left my muzzle as my tail was playfully bit, "Logan!"

"What?" He asked instantly I could tell from his voice that if he could smile, he would be grinning.

"That's not fair!" I wanted my voice to sound firm but even I could hear that I too would be smiling, if I could.

It was silent for a while as we continued to run through the forest. I was enjoying the silence between us as I listened to the forest, I could hear birds high in the trees above, the rustle of bushes more than ten metres away and the heartbeat of animals in the forest surrounding us.

"Catch me!" I suddenly projected into Logan's head before I picked up speed and darted off to the left, catching both Logan and myself off guard.

My wolf was obviously thrilled at the fact that our mate was chasing behind us, his paws thundering against the forest floor. A bubble of excitement seemed to gather in my chest and I forced myself to run faster so that Logan wouldn't catch up to us so quickly. I knew that Logan was being fair and keeping himself restrained so that he wouldn't immediately catch us and I guessed he was enjoying the chase as much as I was.

I ducked my head so that my eyes were protected as I tore through what seemed to be a wall of green and into a clearing. My steps faltered at the beautiful sight in front of me which lead to Logan tackling me to the floor with a gentle push. I found myself once again lying on my back with my paws tickling Logan's under belly.

"Caught you." His voice whispered into my head as he stood above me, his brown eyes locking with my green ones.

It was as if the pull between us had intensified and continued to ever since I had shifted, that or this was how it should have felt to begin with. I wondered if this was how Logan felt all of the time that he was around me. The constant need to be touching him, to be around him and to make sure he was happy seemed to be my number one priority. Everything had shifted and now my life seemed to have a new order with everything revolving around Logan.

I knew that I should have been scared or a little bit worried about the sudden intensity of the mate bond between Logan and me but for once I wasn't. It was as if everything suddenly felt right, the unfinished puzzle that had been my life for so long had suddenly been pieced together.

"Well you are an Alpha." I responded after a moment of just gazing up at him in what I knew was wonder.

Logan growled in approval before lowering his head and placing his cold nose into my neck. I knew that he was breathing in my scent as I was doing the same to him. I hadn't noticed it until now just how appealing Logan's scent was to me, it seemed to call out to me and my wolf and with one intake I was already feeling light headed.

"I think we need to talk," Logan began, "in human form."

"I don't have any clothes." I told him. I knew that when I shifted back into my human form that I would be naked and it would certainly take some getting used to.

"Wait here." Logan told me before he stepped off of me and darted into the bushes and back the way we came.

I took the opportunity to roll back onto my belly and slowly stand to my feet. Logan came back a few minutes later in his human form, his hair was spiked in all different directions and a pair of shorts hung lowly on his hips. There was no denying how attractive Logan was and seeing him shirtless in front of me was not helping me to control the urges of my wolf.

"Here." Logan smiled as he handed me a T-shirt that I now noticed he had been carrying in his hands.

"Um," I mumbled as he placed the shirt on the ground in front of me, "how do I shift back?"

"Just imagine your human self, your feet and hands, your legs and arms, your face." He instructed.

"Can you turn around?" I wasn't ready for Logan to see me naked yet.

Logan laughed with a small shake of his head but turned around anyway. I stared at his back before doing as he said. I imagined my feet and hands, my arms and legs and what I looked like. At first nothing happened and a frustrated growl left my lips.

"Relax." Logan spoke as I looked to see that he still had his back to me.

With a huff I did as he said and closed my eyes before relaxing my tense muscles. I thought of how it felt to walk, how my arms felt when I would swing them by my side. I imagined myself wriggling my fingers and toes and soon a tingling sensation took over my body and the next thing I knew I felt myself sitting down on the ground. I opened my eyes to see that I now sat naked in the grass. In a hurry I quickly grabbed the t-shirt and pulled it over my head, my arms easily fitting through the two arms holes of the large T-shirt.

My legs were a little shaky as I got to my feet, the bottom of the t-shirt tumbling down my body and resting just above my knees. "You can turn around now."

Logan turned with a smile gracing his face. In a few strides Logan stood in front of me, his hands gently cupping my cheeks as he looked down at me. The tingles danced across my skin, causing heat to rise up to my cheeks as my heart beat seemed to go out of control and judging by the smile on Logan's face he knew the effect he had on me.

"How do you feel?" He asked quietly, his brown eyes darting over all of my facial features.

I thought about his question. I felt different, but it was a good sort of different. I no longer felt weak and I knew that I was stronger with my wolf. The idea of having a wolf didn't freak me out, it didn't scare me nor did I wish that she wasn't a part of me. I knew that deep down she had always been a part of me even when she lay dormant.

"Different," I told him honestly with a small smile, "but a good different."

His dark eyebrows shot up in surprise, "you're not mad?"

"No,I'm not mad, my wolf she's a part of me now and I trust her," I shook my head, "just doesn't order me around again."

"She's beautiful, just like you." Logan told me with a cheesy grin on his face. "I won't."

I laughed loudly as I realised the man before me was an Alpha. I had learned over the past few weeks that Alphas were meant to be scary, to be cold and mean but Logan wasn't, not when he was around me. I felt a warm feeling inside of me as I realised that I was probably one of the very few people that got to experience Logan laidback and relaxed to see him smile and laugh.

"What happened?" I asked him after my laughter had subsided.

Logan frowned, "I don't know myself. You woke up complaining that you were too hot and when I touched your skin it was as if it was on fire. I called Luke as soon as I touched your skin knowing that something was wrong and when I placed you in the bath you could no longer see. That was when I knew that I had to get you to Luke and quick. You passed out before I reached the infirmary where Luke began to look after you. You didn't wake up for so long, you just lay there unmoving until your bones began to break and we realized that you were going to shift."

I was surprised to hear that I had been unconscious for so long but Logan's story did make sense. I guess my body was just preparing itself for the shift and for the awakening of my wolf.

"You scared me." Logan whispered.

I looked up at him once again not realising that I had turned my head to look up at the sky as I lost myself in my thoughts. Before me wasn't an Alpha but a man who had been scared of losing someone he cared for.

I smiled softly as I reached up and cupped Logan's unshaved cheeks in my hands, "I won't scare you again."

"I hope not."

"Promise." I smiled at him.

Logan smiled before capturing my lips with his own.