Chapter 62- Entwined Hands

^^Alastair...'cause he's a hot tamale^^

*As promised there will be two updates this week. One today, Friday, and another on Sunday. Enjoy~!

"Even in the darkness, it's possible to create light."

Chapter 62

Entwined Hands

Luna's POV

I felt practically giddy. I had a name, one my human had given me, and the declaration itself was freeing. I wasn't bound by merely my existence, but a name that tied me to the world I was born into. Unlike the majority of my existence, I finally felt connected.

My beginning was one of complete darkness, hidden in the deepest depths of a mind I knew no name to. I was alone yet knew not the name to go with the feeling. It was a cold, empty existence, locked away and unaware of where I was and who I was. All I knew was the dark abyss that swallowed me for as long as I could remember.

It was only when a sharp connection had hit me that I became aware, able to see through the eyes of my other half. I was afraid at first, confused by the images presented before me. I remained silent, merely watching and absorbing my human's life before voicing my existence. What I didn't expect was the fear that met my first uttered words. I felt it, deep in my bones as he did his, shaking as my conscience became apparent to him.

His fear shocked me, shocked me to near silence. I barely spoke out of mere panic. My human was terrified by me and I wasn't sure why. His memories were locked to me as mine were to him. We were different entities entirely. We coexisted but our minds remained separate. I felt unwanted and so incredibly alone. I slowly began to question my own existence, whether there was a point in my existence at all. It was at that moment of complete vulnerability that I was called, named by my human in a moment where he was as vulnerable as I.

I was no longer just an existence, stuffed in the back of another's subconscious but something of more importance, something deserving of a name.

"Luna."

My head turned to the sound of my name. Such a strange feeling, to be called by someone other than River. My head tilted to the cross-armed blond as he watched me from above, face scrunched in a troubled manner.

"Why are you over there bunched into a corner?" He eyed my balled up form.

"To conserve heat." Of course.

I hadn't realized how cold the nights were here until shifting into this form. In my other, I was warm enough throughout the nights. Though this hairless form served as useless against cold temperatures. I tried to shift back during the night but it proved as impossible. I wasn't even sure how I had taken this form much less how to switch back. So I took to doing the only thing I knew, finding a small space and conserving my heat as much as possible. At least with that, I could manage to sleep through the night, even through all the shaking.

River wanted to join Alastair in his bed but I feared his reaction lest he wakes up seeing me beside him. River claimed he wouldn't harm me but with the anger, I'd been exposed to, I couldn't help but distrust such a statement. Instead, I took to the nearest corner.

"You slept like that? Bunched up in a corner? Alastair didn't give you a blanket or anything?" Michael pivoted his head to Alastair's bed where he laid, deep in sleep.

I shook my head.

To this, Michael's stance tensed. My head tilted.

What was he upset about?

And like that, the man was on the move. His feet stomped across the room as his hands swung from side to side. He stood above Alastair's bed and before I could process what was happening, he lifted a decorative pillow and took to whacking Alastair over the head with it. The man awoke with a startle, jumping up with widened eyes, hair ruffled in awkward directions. It took him a few seconds to process what had happened but once eyeing Michael's form above him, pillow still in hand, realization dawned on him and a near comedic expression drawled his face. He was stunned.

"Did you just...?" He gasped as he eyed the pillow in Michael's hand.

Instead of answering, Michael huffed an exasperated breath and took to pulling the top layer of Alastair's blankets off him, leaving him with just a cotton sheet. Alastair could barely mutter a protest as Michael turned and marched his way back in my direction. I flinched, nearly expecting a piece of his anger as well. But to my surprise, he merely threw the fur blanket on top of me and dropped into the nearest cushioned seat with a huffed breath and crossed arm, pillow still dangling noticeably in one of his hands.

It was silent for a few moments, a vein ticked along Alastair's jaw before his mouth opened,

"What the hell, Michael."

Michael adjusted his arms, eyes narrowing, "I leave you alone with him for the night and I come back to find out that you had made him sleep on the floor with nothing to warm him but his own skin. What the hell to you, Alastair," he returned.

Alastair's attention quickly shifted to me.

"I didn't realize that it was cold," he managed through his teeth as he eyed me, "it didn't seem to have a problem before."

I pulled the blanket securely around me.

"Before he had fur. Not that he could've complained had he'd even been cold."

Alastair was silent for a few minutes. His eyes shifted, suddenly so full of sadness as he peered at me. It was an emotion I was unfamiliar to seeing, anger I'd seen since the moment I'd taken form but sadness...that was new.

River stirred in the back of my mind. He was unhappy. He wanted to know what was wrong, to comfort his mate in any way he could.

"Ask him what's wrong," River pushed.

I took a shaky breath.

What if he gets upset?

"He won't."

"W-what's wrong?" The words came out before I could think.

Alastair's eyes widened momentarily before shaking his head. His eyes turned to his sheets as his fingers adjusted the sheets around his waist.

"Something is wrong," River voiced. He was growing nervous for reason I could not understand.

Wouldn't I instinctively be able to tell if there was something wrong?

River was silent for a few seconds, "maybe not in my body."

My lips pulled tight.

What are you saying?

River gasped, "not like that. It's just that you're in my body now, not yours, and I'm not very...well...you know, instinctual."

My mind wandered to past experiences, looking on through River's eyes. Times where he questioned Alastair's fidelity, fell off a balcony, tripped and broke his arm...

River huffed as I laughed.

My eyes lifted from the floor as I laughed lightly to myself. Though my laughter was cut short as I locked eyes with a tight-browed Alastair. My laughter lodged in my throat.

"Am I humoring you?" Alastair voiced wryly.

I hastily shook my head as my teeth cut into my bottom lip.

I've angered him again.

My eyes wandered back to the floor.

"He thinks that you were laughing at him," River voice reasoned, "just apologize and he'll calm down."

I shook my head.

No. No matter what I say, he'll hate me. It's better if I just remain quiet.

"He doesn't hate you."

Yes, he does. He may love you but he has a completely different passion towards me.

"That's not true," River voice heightened.

He was growing angry with me too.

"I'm not angry with you," River's voice grew soft, "just your thoughts and Alastair for making you feel as you do. I would never be angry at you for feeling a certain way. No matter how much I disagree with it. You know that, Luna."

I smiled at my name.

River laughed softly, "I'll call you it as much as you want."

Always.

An object fell to the floor with a thump followed by a gasp. My head turned as I watched Michael jump to his feet and hurry to Alastair's side. The man doubled over while cupping his head. Michael lifted a hand to Alastair's forehead before shaking his head and turning to the door.

"I'll go make some herbal tea and be right back," his hand reached for the knob.

"Wait," my voice came out low and shaky, "what's wrong? Is he okay?"

Michael took a breath, "he has a slight fever," he looked back at Alastair with the shake of a head, "probably stress induced." Michael's expression softened as he turned to me,"I'll be right back, don't worry." He patted me on the head, barely allowing for a word to slip out my mouth, before slipping out the door.

And then, silence. All that filled the room were Alastair's labored breathes from his bed. I sat in the corner, watching, as River fluttered in panic. He was practically clawing in my mind, struggling to break free and embrace the pained man.

"Go closer," River cried, "I need to see him."

I shook my head and stayed in place.

What if he grows angry with me?

"Please, he's not feeling well. I need to see him," River begged.

River's pain was slicing through me. I winced.

I succumbed to River's wishes and took cautious steps from my corner, slowly approaching the large bed with careful movements. I almost expected a hand to reach out and harm me as I stood above the man but none came. River grew entirely more nervous as he saw Alastair's paling face against the sheets.

Beyond my control, my hand reached out gently brushed against his dark hair. My eyes widened against the movement but I couldn't seem to pull away.

His hair is so soft, I smiled.

River hummed his agreement as my fingers lightly combed through his thick strands.

A sudden movement paused my fingers in their tracks as a large hand reached up and wrapped around my hand. Alastair's eyes slowly opened and locked with mine. I froze. My breath caught in my throat. He brought my hand to his face and leaned into it.

"The same hand," he voiced hoarsely. My breath sucked into my throat as I watched a tear fall down the sharp lines of his face.

His eyes closed and a deep breath fell from his lips. I remained rigid, silent as I stood by his bed, hand outstretched in his tight hold as I waited. His steady breathing and fluttered eyelashes let me know he had fallen asleep yet his hand's grip would not loosen. I pride at his fingers yet with my weak demeanor it was all in vain. I was growing more anxious by the minute. My eyes kept wandering back to the corner I so desperately wanted to crawl back into, to hide from the reality I had now exposed myself to.

I regretted following my instincts. It was in my nature to do so yet I somehow wished I had gone against it. At the time it seemed like the only action to take though now as I stood, held captive by a man that should have loved me, I couldn't but feel more alone than I ever had locked away in River's mind. At least then I could pretend that my mate loved me.

A soft sniffle escaped my throat. I reached my hand up to wipe at my nose as the creaking of a door cracked through the room. I turned my head to see Michael's form quietly slipping into the room with a small tray of tea in hand.

"Is he sleeping?" He whispered as he peeked over my shoulder to glimpse at Alastair's form.

I nodded, though he hadn't cared to gaze back at me for my reply. He instead turned to the night table and placed the tray down carefully.

Michael placed his hands on his hips with a sigh, "and I went through all this trouble," he trailed off as he eyed Alastair.

As he did so, his eyes dropped to our connecting hands.

"Hmm," he raised his brow with a growing smirk.

Heat rose up my nape as I gasped, peering at our hands and then back at Michael, who continued to smirk.

"It's not," I stammered, "we didn't..he just grabbed my hand all of a sudden and started talking about how our hands are the same."

To that, his smirk dropped, "whose hands are the same?"

I swallowed nervously and peered down at my hand entwined with Alastair's.

"River and I's, I think."

I didn't look up to see Michael's reaction but I could only guess from his silence that he wasn't thrilled with my statement.

A few moments of silence passed before I spoke.

"Do you," I peered up but cut myself short as I peered back down.

"Do I, what?"

I peered back up with a sucked in breath. I gazed to the side at Alastair's sleeping form.

"Do you think that maybe.." I bit my lip, "that his stress is from me, maybe?"

His eyes darted to Alastair with no reply. His silence was answer enough. I nodded and gazed back down at our entwined hands. His hold was loosening but still not enough to pull my hand free of his.

"Perhaps," Michael answered, his voice low.

My eyes lifted to meet his.

"But I think it's more the absence of River than your appearance that's causing his anxiety," he continued.

"What's the difference?"

Both were caused by me. Like cause and effect.

"I don't think it's your presence that's spurring his stress is what I'm saying," he reached for the pot of tea and began pouring himself a cup.

"But it is," I scoffed, "I'm the reason River is here," I pointed to my head, "and not..well here," I waved my hands around me.

Michael's movements froze.

"What do you mean by that?"

My head tilted. By what?

"What do you mean by here?" Michael pointed at his head.

I mimicked his movements in confusion before what he was asking hit me.

"Oh, umm," I scratched my head, "like he's here," I pointed at my forehead, "in my head."

Michael seemed stunned, nearly dropped the teacup on the floor before quickly settling himself.

"What?" Michael breathed.

River appeared just as confused as me as we watched Michael jump from his chair and make a strange high-pitched sound. I flinched, nearly falling backward as Michael grew entirely more high-pitched.

The movement awoke Alastair, as I tugged at his hand, with an exasperated groan.

"For Goddess's sake, Michael," he hissed before rolling to the side. A squeak of my own escaped my mouth as I was lodged forward, falling beside Alastair on the bed.

A chimed laugh erupted behind me. My eyes narrowed.

I turned my head to glare at Michael but saw he was paying no attention to me as he cupped his stomach and shook with laughter.

"Michael," I whined.

He lifted his head with a bright smile and pet my head with a playful grin.

"You know, you and River have such similar mannerisms," he wiped at his eyes.

"Well, of course," I sighed, "we're bound to be similar. We're two halves of the same soul."

To that, Michael grinned and ruffled my hair, "though you have a bit more sass to you. River's more the peacekeeper type."

"I'm going to take that as a compliment," River mumbled.

I laughed.

"What?" Michael smiled quizzically.

"River said he'll take that as a compliment," I laughed lightly to Michael's stunned expression.

He quickly recovered and cleared his throat, "he should," he huffed with crossed arms.

Alastair's hand gripped tightly around mine to which I gasped. Suddenly, I was on my back and Alastair was above me. His hands wrapped around mine as he leaned on his elbows. His warm breath breezed past my flushed cheeks as his mouth opened.

"Is that true?"