CH 59.2
Fantasy Farm
translator: baumkuchen
Jiang Buhuan rode in the minivan (one of those luxury limo minivans. Like the toyota alphard), along with the director and the rest of the artists. Perhaps because of that terrifying dream last night, Jiang Buhuan had been a little on edge the entire day. He kept having a bad feeling.
âWhatâs wrong, A-Huan?â Wu Ya, sitting next to Jiang Buhuan, asked in a soft voice, âWhy are your eyebrows so furrowed?â
âI donât feel very well.â Jiang Buhuan pinched the spot between his brows.
Wu Ya said, âOhâ¦â¦ Then do you want to sleep for a while?â
Jiang Buhuan said, âNah.â Even though he felt exhausted, he wasnât sleepy.
Wu Yu said, âThen Iâll sleep for a while, Iâm so tired.â She yawned, then actually fell asleep almost instantly after she closed her eyes.
The entire car seemed to be filled with this sleep-inducing atmosphere. Without him realising it, the people around Jiang Buhuan who had been awake were all asleep in a pile. It seemed like everyone had been incredibly tired.
Jiang Buhuan was a little sleepy now, too. He yawned, feeling his eyelids becoming heavier and heavier, but just as he was about to fall asleep, the Buddha pendant which had been hanging around his neck since he had been born suddenly started radiating with heat and burned Jiang Buhuan, shocking him awake. He wrenched open his eyes, and was shocked stiff by the scene that met him. He saw the driver, who had still been driving just now, actually asleep at the wheel. The car, having lost control, was about to speed off the narrow mountain roads.
Jiang Buhuan was soaked in cold sweat. He rushed towards the fallen driver as fast as he could, grabbed the steering wheel, and wrenched the car in another direction. Fortunately, at that time, the car hadnât been going very fast. The car ran straight into the cliff, and after a bang, stopped.
Seeing this, Jiang Buhuan hurriedly looked back at the car holding their equipment that had been following them from behind. It seemed the crew members on that car hadnât been affected, hurriedly stepping on the break upon seeing this scene and avoiding crashing into them.
Jiang Buhuanâs entire body was trembling. If he had woken up just a few seconds later, all the people in this car could have met their end right there and then. Just as he was thinking this, rather gladly, Jiang Buhuan felt a gaze pierce through him. He turned, and saw the director sitting by the window, staring at him with a hateful look in his eyes. But that look seemed to just be Jiang Buhuanâs misconception. In the next second, the director started asking worriedly about what had just happened.
The crew members in the other car also seemed to have been given a shock by what had happened to this car, all having gotten out and were now surrounding the vehicle, wanting to see what had happened.
The sleeping people in the car all woke up one after another, all of them clearly unaware about what had just happened, confusion painted across their faces. Upon realising that heâd just been asleep, the driverâs face turned pale from shock. He stumbled down from the driverâs seat.
âThe entire car fell asleep,â Jiang Buhuan said, âThankfully I woke up and managed to turn the steering wheel.â
âHow did we all fall asleep?â The others all found this rather unbelievable. One person falling asleep was normal, but how could the entire car of people have fallen asleep together?
âI donât know.â Wu Ya had a dazed look on her face. âI just felt really sleepyâ¦â¦â
âIt must be a problem with that village,â Another artist said in a terrified voice, âLetâs hurry back home, we all almost died here. This village is too creepy, Iâm never coming back here again.â
In a flurry of chatter and noise, they hurriedly set out again. Just that this time, everyone was 100% alert and staring at the driver, not daring to lose focus.
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The rest of the journey passed with no more incidents. The program group finally succeeded in leaving Shuifu village.
Hearing about what had happened to Jiang Buhuan from WeChat, Lu Qingjiu was a little shocked. He told Yin Xun and Bai Yuehu about it over lunch.
Bai Yuehu originally didnât have a good impression of the group. Him not having made a move against them was already the greatest kindness he could grant them. Not even his expression changed upon hearing what had happened to them. He was clearly utterly uninterested.
Rather, it was Yin Xun who found it all a little strange. âThatâs weird, in the past, there have been outsiders whoâve come to Shuifu village before. Even though they werenât very welcomed, they at least never had to worry about losing their lives.â
Lu Qingjiu said, âYeah.â
âBut I did realise something,â Yin Xun said, âMost of the people whoâve come to Shuifu village were all invited.â
Lu Qingjiu asked, âWhy do you say that?â
Yin Xun said, âYou go without saying, you grew up here, so you count as one of us. Letâs take Zhu Miaomiao as an example. Sheâs also an outsider, but she only came here at your invitation.â He took a bite of tender stir-fried Chinese lettuce. âMaybe itâs because of that that nothing happened to her?â
âBut going by what youâve said, the program group was also invited.â Lu Qingjiu felt like there were some holes in his reasoning. âRemember the Liu family who gave them the keys to the house?â
Yin Xun said, âAh, thatâs true too.â
Lu Qingjiu said, âUnlessâ¦â¦â
Yin Xun, âUnless what?â
Lu Qingjiu said, âUnless the person who invited them here, wasnât actually a member of the Liu family.â
Yin Xun was stunned. âWhat do you mean?â
Lu Qingjiu said, âItâs just a theory, thereâs no meaning to it. Last night, I made some silver tree-ear fungus soup, you should drink some. Right, do you know how to catch bees?â He was prepared to produce some honey this year.
Yin Xun said, âI donât know. But I heard that most beekeepers just make their own man-made beehives and trick honeybees to nest inside. When thereâs a queen bee inside, the whole swarm will move in.â
Just as Lu Qingjiu was about to say that heâd better study some tutorials on the Internet before staring, Bai Yuehu, from where he was sitting next to him, said, âIâll catch the bees, you can just prepare the beehive.â
âAlright.â Lu Qingjiu didnât fight him, happily agreeing.
After spring had begun, Lu Qingjiu had cleaned up the chicken coop and the cow pen. The cow that Bai Yuehu had brought back with him had hibernated for the entire winter, so they hadnât had any milk. Now that spring had arrived, the cow had woken up, and started mooing to say that he was hungry.
Yin Xun ran very fast, grabbing the freshly-harvested cucumber and going off to feed the cow, even excitedly saying that heâd never drank cucumber-flavoured milk before.
Lu Qingjiu stared at his back, for a time, not knowing what to say. The cowâs special trait had given Yin Xunâs imagination wings, letting him fly off into the sky.
So that night, they drank subtly cucumber-flavoured milk. The taste actually wasnât bad, the milk had the freshness of cucumber, and wasnât musty at all. Lu Qingjiu felt like he really liked it, but Bai Yuehu disliked it a lot, playing it to one side and not touching it again after one sip.
After Jiang Buhuan and the rest had left, the village once more returned to its former tranquility. The next-door Uncle Li had even sent Lu Qingjiu some loquats from their trees.
The loquats from this farmer village were very small, and didnât have much flesh, but they were especially sweet, and had a rich flavour, completely unlike those loquats sold in the city, which were very big but had little flavour. As Lu Qingjiu was eating the loquats, a call from the seedling shop owner came. He said that the tree seedlings Lu Qingjiu had ordered had arrived, there were oranges, apples, loquats, all sorts, which ones did Lu Qingjiu want?
Lu Qingjiu chose a few, preparing to plant a few in both the inner and outer courtyard. If they followed the normal growth rate, it would take several years before they would be able to taste their fruits, but his home had Bai Yuehu, this ripening master, who was a lot more useful than fertiliser. Perhaps they would even be able to eat fruits from their own trees this autumn.
Yin Xun sneakily gave Bai Yuehu the nickname of Bai Fertiliser. Of course, he didnât dare to call Bai Yuehu this to his face, only saying it to Lu Qingjiu in private.
After hearing it, Lu Qingjiu broke out into loud laughter, then told Yin Xun to absolutely under no circumstances let Bai Yuehu know, otherwise, the one who would become fertilizer would have a very high chance of being Yin Xun himselfâ¦â¦
Yin Xun nodded like he was using his head to grind garlic, saying that he had a very strong sense of self-preservation.
Bai Yuehuâs ability to get things done had always been very strong. Heâd said that he was going to catch bees for Lu Qingjiu, and after three days, heâd already gotten them. Lu Qingjiu hadnât even gotten his beehive done when he saw Bai Yuehu come back holding a plastic bag. After he got home, he placed the plastic bag on the table and said, âI got the bees.â
Lu Qingjiu was a little stunned. âWhere?â
âHere.â Bai Yuehu pointed at the plastic bag.
Lu Qingjiu, ââ¦â¦â
Yin Xun, ââ¦â¦â
Even though the two of them had never kept bees before, they knew that they couldnât be caught with a plastic bagâ¦â¦
As Bai Yuehu had spoken, he had lifted the bag. Then, just like that, he opened up the bag and showed it to Lu Qingjiu. Lu Qingjiu was startled by his action, but seeing that no bees came flying out after the bag was opened, he came over to take a look. He saw that there were four or five bees in the plastic bag. It was just that no matter how you looked at it, those bees didnât look right. Even overlooking how each one was about the size of a bird, their upper half looked like a bird as well, even having feathers on their wings. Lu Qingjiu looked up. âThese are bees?â
Bai Yuehu, âYes.â
Lu Qingjiu, âBees can grow feathers?â
Bai Yuehu, âMaybe because it was too cold.â
Lu Qingjiu, âWhy are each of them so big?â
Bai Yuehu, âBecause they ate a lot?â
Lu Qingjiu, ââ¦â¦â Do you think Iâm an idiot.
What most made Lu Qingjiu not know whether to laugh or cry was that upon hearing the twoâs conversation, those bees looked up at them, a pitiful look in their eyes, looking just like they had been harshly bullied.
Lu Qingjiu still had more to say, when those bees actually started speaking human words in a soft voice. One of the bees said in a trembling voice, âGe, donât doubt it anymore. I really am I bee, buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz buzz.â
Lu Qingjiu, ââ¦â¦â Motherfucking buzz buzz buzz, what kind of bee used their mouth to buzz? No, the important point wasnât this, it was what kind of bee could speak human words?! They even spoke Mandarin? Were these high-quality beez who had gone through nine years of compulsory education?
The other bees also started buzzing, simply wanting nothing more to paste âIâm a beeâ in big letters on their foreheads.
Faced with these trembling, âbeesâ who had been forced into claiming such an identity for themselves, Bai Yuehu expressed his satisfaction, âSee, like I said, theyâre bees.â
Lu Qingjiu decided to give up his questioning. ââ¦â¦Fine.â
If they said they were bees, they were bees, there wasnât much he could do but leave it be.