CH 2.4

Yohan crossed the sign and prayed briefly. I was overwhelmed by the unique elegance and beauty of a man who had been a cleric since birth. That’s why I didn’t know back then. About the fact that he tried to push me. In retrospect, his hand crossing the sign was unusually firm. He built a wall between me and him, and seemed to mark a stigma on his own chest.

Would it have been easier to convince him if I had noticed it then? I used to feel such regret sometimes when I got a little older, but what can I do? It’s already irreversible. Back then, I was Young Lady Rivero like I am now, but it is also true that I was only a 14-year-old girl who was just in love.

“You’ve been living in the Temple since you were born blessed by God, haven’t you?”

“Yes. I, not knowing about life outside of the Temple and much lacking, am not sure if I may be able to fulfill the cardinal’s duties, but yes, you’re right.”

“You must have been in trouble because you don’t know much about the outside.”

“Considering my position, I’m going to find out gradually. With the help of people I’m grateful for like you.”

“Yes, I will help you.”

“Thank you.”

“It was really rude of me to suddenly suggest leaving the priesthood. The future you’ve had in mind is completely different from the environment you’ve lived in, but I suddenly acted in a hurry. You should have time to think too, but I guess I was only thinking about myself.”

“Young Lady Rivero?”

When I brought up about leaving the priesthood, the smile disappeared from his face. He must have been at a loss again at the thought of leaving the Temple. I understood his worries and conflicts, and at the same time I wanted to ease his burden.

“But I’m sure you’ll be able to adjust quickly. I will help you. You’ll be happier than when you’re in the priesthood. I guarantee you. We love each other, after all.”

“Young Lady Rivero, let go.”

His voice trembled. The hand I grabbed trembled like electricity was flowing. My heart was pounding. So did his heart. He forced his hand out of me. His face was red. He must have been very embarrassed. His voice became lower and lower. It was unstable because it was just after his voice changed, but it sounded sweet to me. I looked forward to the day when he would be honest with me.

One day he’ll give me back the sweet nothing I’m whispering now. It was exciting just imagining it.

“When would be a good time to get married? It’s better after you settle down, right? How much time do you need to clear your mind?”

“Young Lady, I don’t love you.”

“Lie.”

“I won’t even marry you.”

“Lie.”

“I won’t quit my job.”

Yohan’s face slowly hardened as I saw through his lies. That’s right. Everything Yohan said was a lie. A downright lie. There’s no way Yohan doesn’t love me. He wants to marry me. I’m telling you he will leave priesthood one day because he loves me.

Yohan loves Tite. I was confident that I knew the never-changing truth.

“If it’s difficult for you to leave, I won’t insist on getting married. Yes, it’ll be a disgrace to the family, but I’m fine being your mistress.”

“Lady Tite Rivero! Get out of this room right now!”

“Call me Tite, Yohan.”

He got up and opened the door himself to help me get out. Oh my. Is there anyone else who has been treated like that by the Cardinal except the Holy Father? That’s how important I was to him. We only met once at his celebration and we hadn’t seen each other for a month, but his feelings for me haven’t changed.

I left quietly because I knew he needed time. I asked when we would like to meet next time instead. He closed the door without answering, perhaps he was shy.

Instead, a letter arrived to my parents. It said that I need strict parental supervision because I’m completely deluded. What? Deluded? It was really weird. Because from the day the letter arrived, everyone who saw me was talking in unison.

“Cardinal Yohan does not love Tite Rivero.”

How could people be so deluded? It was so rude that I was angry. I am not deluding myself. They are. People were clearly mistaking that he doesn’t love me. It all came from his perfect trick.

I was a little hurt, but I understood him. I forgave him generously. Because Yohan lived with everyone’s expectations on him.

Yohan. The Cardinal, Yohan. The Pope in the future, Yohan. A noble man. A holy man. The hope of mankind blessed by the Holy God. It is said an oracle of God was given when he was born. Therefore, the Holy Father himself visited his house and brought Yohan to the Temple to raise him.

Humanity has fought the demons for a long time. Several kingdoms disappeared during the long war and they remained as Houses, united under the Temple and became the Holy Nation. There have been several ceasefires, but there has been no end of war. Old people don’t even remember when the perfect peace was. Humanity is tired of war and afraid of when the ceasefire will end. And that’s how Yohan came to us.

A person blessed by God. Someone who will bring the end of the war to mankind in the future.

Many people had high hopes for Yohan. People wanted him to be the hope of mankind and he was forced to be such a man from birth. It was a heavy burden and expectation, which was unparalleled by me, who would take over the Rivero family in the future. Yohan is a faithful person, so he couldn’t betray that expectation. Even if it’s for love.

We definitely love each other, but our love doesn’t take responsibility for other people’s happiness. That he can’t move at will even if he loves me—I understand it. I understand. Therefore, I gave up the most precious thing to a girl in love.

You know what that is, right?

Yeah, it’s a marriage.