March 30th 2016

"Don't shave!"

"Don't shave?"

"Please don't tell me that you already did."

"I was going to shave on Friday morning. You know, to avoid stubble. Clean shaven tends to look better. Or no?"

"I like the beard, so keep it."

"I'll keep it then."

"Thank you! It gives you a little... I don't know. Makes you look ruggedly handsome."

"I think you're complimenting me, Miss Clément. I think I need to take a moment and bask in it because you don't compliment me every day."

"Maybe not out loud."

"But inside your head, you do?"

"Not everyday. Just, most days."

"Tell me more."

"Tell me more."

"Was it love at first sight?"

"Tell me more."

"Tell me more."

"Did she put up a fight?"

"We are so silly right now."

"Ah, who cares! It's fun!"

"Just out of interest, was it love at first sight?"

"No."

"No?"

"More like, second. Or third."

"I can deal with that."

"Did she put up a fight?"

"I think that's your question to answer."

"Oh, right. No, there was no fight."

"I knew my charm would win you over."

"Totally."

"Right... what were we talking about before we detoured into Grease?"

"Um... I can't remember."

"Oh, Dory. You really are living up to your namesake."

"I have a namesake?"

"Do you watch animated movies?"

"Not since I was about... however old I was in 1994."

"You're twenty-nine now, right? That means you were born in eighty-seven, so you would have been seven in ninety-four."

"In that case, I haven't seen an animated movie since I was seven."

"And what film was that?"

"Hamlet. With Lions."

"The Lion King."

"That's what I called it."

"No, you called it Hamlet with Lions."

"But that's what it really is. Like Beauty and the Beast should be called Stockholm Syndrome."

"Oh, God. What have I started?!"

"Hunchback of Notre Dame should be called Nice Guy Finishes Last. Cinderella should have been called Makeover Fixes Everything. The Little Mermaid should have been-"

"Ok, I get it. Animated movies are not your thing."

"Are they your thing?"

"Only when Nola's over and demands that we watch Pixar or Disney."

"Huh."

"What does that mean?"

"What?"

"'Huh?'"

"Nothing, just that you're such a pushover."

"Not with everyone."

"Just with Nola."

"And you."

"Right, because I have you wrapped around my little finger."

"Exactly."

"... Do you even remember why this call started?"

"Yeah, you called to tell me that I was dashingly handsome with my beard."

"I don't recall using the word 'dashingly.'"

"For argument's sake, lets just agree that you did."

"You want me to agree with you?"

"Preferably."

"No, I think I'd prefer to disagree."

"You want to face off against a lawyer? I was trained to argue and to argue well. So, I'll ask you again, do you really want to disagree with me?"

"Well, maybe not today. Some other time."

"That's what I thought."

"Whatever, Daniel."

"I've been meaning to tell you something."

"..."

"You can call me Dan, if you want. Or Danny. That's what all my friends call me."

"..."

"Sophie?"

"I will never call you Dan or Danny. Ever. I like Daniel."

"If you're sure."

"I'm sure. I can't imagine calling you by anything else. Dan. Danny."

"Oh, God, that sounds weird! Yeah, don't call me any of those."

"See."

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Do you have any preferences concerning your name?"

"Not really. It's generally just Sophie. Although, I really like it when you call me Soph. You're the only one that does."

"Ok, noted."

"Thanks."

"So, I've been thinking- if you get to prank me on April Fool's Day, surely I get to prank you."

"You honestly think you can prank me?"

"Yes."

"Oh, please. Fine, by all means, try. You'll fail."

"You underestimate me, Soph."

"You overestimate yourself."

"You're so cocksure. What if you're not as good as you think you are?"

"I'm not. I'm better."

"Fighting talk."

"Uh huh."

"Game on, Clément."

"That it is. May the best woman win."

"Or the best man."

"Gotta be so PC about this stuff."

"This isn't about political correctness, Soph. It's the truth. The best man will win."

"Woman."

"Guess we'll find out on Friday, huh?"

"Definitely."

"Until then, then."

"Wait, what? Until Friday? What about tomorrow?"

"The prank can wait until Friday. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Oh, thank God! I thought you were blowing me off."

"Never."

"Ok, so tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow."

"Is this the end of today's conversation?"

"Yeah, I need to get back to boring law stuff."

"I need to get back to... being a slave to fashion."

"Enjoy that."

"Enjoy your law stuff."

"I shall. Later, alligator."

"In a while, crocodile."