March 11th 2016

"So, which neighbourhood do you want to live in? Brooklyn or Manhattan?"

"Daniel?"

"Yeah?"

"Nothing, I was just checking who it was. What are you banging on about neighbourhoods for?"

"Well, you're going to need a place to stay, aren't you?"

"Yeas, but-"

"So, I'm helping you house hunt. I'm on the NY Times website. They have a pretty decent rental listing page."

"That's sweet, but-"

"How many bedrooms will you need? Probably two, right? One for you, a second for guests."

"That could work, but-"

"Two it is. Oh, this looks nice. Flat in the Upper East Side, narrow kitchen but a nice view from the living room. Pricey at $18,000 a month."

"Maybe a little out of my budget,but-"

"What about Soho?"

"Nice area, but Daniel-"

"Chelsea or Tribeca?"

"Daniel, look-"

"The place in Chelsea has exposed ceiling beams and a walk-in closet. Huge bedroom with a balcony, if you want one."

"Not fussed about balconies, to be honest. Now, Daniel-"

"Holy crap! I found your perfect place!"

"Perfect?"

"It's a duplex apartment with a really nice staircase going from the living area up to the roof terrace. Stunning kitchen, even though you'd never use it. Stunning light features that you'd love, big master bedroom with lots of marble in the bathroom. Hey, it's even got a den! $17,500 a month, though."

"What do you mean, a kitchen that I'd never use? I can cook, you know?"

"You can?"

"Yes!"

"Great, you can cook for me on Sunday, then."

"Don't you have to be over Connie's on Sunday?"

"Not if I tell her that I'm with you. She'll let me have at least one weekend free from her tyranny if she knows I'm with you. And especially once I tell her that my time with you is precious and fleeting because you're moving to New York for a while."

"Basically, you're using me as an excuse to not see your grandmother?"

"Or,I just want to hang out with you as much as possible before I don't get to see you for a while."

"Right. Anyway-"

"Yeah, back to the property search, what do you think?"

"That's what I've been trying to tell you. I don't need to find a place to rent over there. My family own several hotels in the city, my mother has a loft there and plus, Emma lives in Brooklyn. I've got plenty of options. Thank you for helping, but I'm kinda already sorted."

"Oh... right. I just didn't want you to think that I was, you know, against the move. Like I said last night, I'll be there every step of the way for you. Going to New York obviously seems really important to you and I... I support you."

"Thanks, Daniel. It means a lot to me."

"You're not going to start crying again, are you? It was pretty freaky last night when you cried, but I don't have your father with me to help this time, so please- don't cry."

"I'm not going to cry, Daniel. And, for your information, I wasn't crying last night. I had allergies."

"To what?"

"I don't know! Hay fever?"

"That sounded almost convincing. But, no, I'm not buying it."

"Haha, I know. Now, onto the second thing I wanted to say- don't you have a drinks thing tonight with that woman from your office? What's-her-name."

"Tamsin?"

"That one, yeah."

"I did, but I cancelled."

"What, why?"

"I, uh... I wasn't feeling it, I guess."

"Daniel, did you cancel because you were too preoccupied helping to find me a place to live?"

"Maybe."

"Silly man. It's not that late, you know. Seven pm is actually a really good time to go out for drinks. Call her and ask her. She seems keen on you so I doubt she'd say no."

"Sophie-"

"Daniel, c'mon, call her. You need to date and after the week you've had, you need a bloody drink. And, before you say anything, sitting at home, drinking alone, does not count. It's pathetic. Call the woman and ask her out."

"I'm really not in the mood,Sophie."

"Get in the mood. I'll totally cook my signature dish on Sunday if you go."

"You're rather fond of this blackmail thing, aren't you?"

"I often find that it's the only way people bend to your will."

"I bet. What's your signature dish?"

"Ratatouille."

"Ratatouille?"

"Yeah, like the film."

"And you serve it on its own?"

"No! I'll make grilled boneless leg of lamb, marinated with olive oil, garlic, lemon, fresh rosemary and thyme."

"I think my stomach just grumbled at the sound of that. Are you sure you can make that, because I'll be really disappointed if you can't."

"My mother's family are all chefs and restaurateurs. My uncle, Dashiell, made sure that we could all cook by making us intern at some of the restaurants in the summer periods after our GCSE and A-Level exams. I was trained by a Michelin starred chef."

"Just the one Michelin star?"

"Two."

"You know, just because you were trained by a Michelin starred chef doesn't make you one."

"Take that back!"

"Nope."

"Take it back, or I'm not cooking."

"Fine, I take it back."

"Now call this Tasmin woman-"

"Tamsin."

"Close enough. Call her and ask her out, Daniel."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Go have fun."

"I am having fun, though."

"If your idea of fun is talking on the phone to me on a Friday night, then you really need to get a life. Starting by going out with this woman who, from how you made it sound last week, is totally into you."

"Fine, I'll call her."

"Gee, Daniel, could you sound any less excited?"

"Probably."

"Go out with her once. You never know, she might be the one for you."

"She won't be."

"You can't say that until you've at least tried. Do you know what you need?"

"What?"

"A kick in the arse."

"Are you volunteering?"

"Not in these shoes! I'm wearing a small fortune on my feet. Plus, these Louboutin's have studs all over them. Imagine how painful that'd be."

"Haha, kinky."

"I'm hanging up now. Consider this to be the metaphorical kick up the arse. With me off the phone, that gives you the opportunity to call Tamsin and ask her out."

"Yeah, yeah."

"You better ask her for drinks, Whitaker. Or should I call you, Captain-"

"NO!"

"You know, I really do like your childhood nickname."

"I don't."

"Why not, Captain-"

"Why are you being mean to me? I thought you were hanging up, any how."

"Right, I am. Glad we're on the same page now. Call me tomorrow with all the deets from tonight."

"Yeah, fine, whatever."

"There's the right attitude to have!"

"Ha bloody ha."

"Right, I'm going now. I need to sort my visa crap out. Later, alligator."

"In a while, crocodile."