February 5th, 2016

"Sophie Evangeline Clément, if you were going to stand me up, you could have at least given me some warning. Like a text, or a phone call."

"Well, Henry Daniel... whatever, you're name is a mouthful. Daniel Whitaker, that's better, right? I have not stood you up. I got caught up in work but I'm on my way."

"Oh."

"Yeah, you better be feeling apologetic because guess who is now buying me my coffee and my muffin?"

"Me?"

"Damn right you are. By the way, if you're being stood up, you don't tend to get a warning because if they text or called, you wouldn't be getting stood up. You'd be getting your date cancelled. There's a vast difference."

"You don't have to lecture me about it. I'm already buying you your coffee an your bloody muffin."

"Oh, but I think I do need to lecture you about it."

"No, you really don't."

"Fine, I won't lecture you."

"Thank God."

"Over the phone, at least. I'll just lecture you in person when I finally get to Hogan's."

"In that case, I'm leaving. Consider yourself stood up."

"See, this is why you need to be told. You've just told me your leaving, ergo I cannot be stood up. Oh, look, a tube station."

"Keep walking, Pug. I'm not going anywhere."

"Good. Want me to tell you my order so you can get it and it'll be ready for me by the time I get there?"

"You're very pushy, has anyone ever told you that?"

"Just about everyone I've ever met."

"Haha. What do you want, Soph?"

"Vanilla latte and a chocolate muffin."

"Are you sure you work at Vogue?"

"Pretty sure I do, why?"

"You don't want a decaf, non fat, soy chai latte with a skinny blueberry muffin?"

"Ew, no. Is that even a thing? Bugger that, I want full fat everything."

"Atta girl."

"Hey, how was your day off? Did you do anything fun?"

"It was good, and yes, I did do something fun."

"... which was?"

"I'll tell you when you get here."

"Boo. Tell me now!"

"- May I have a large vanilla latte and an Americano, please.-"

>

"- No, may I also have a chocolate muffin and a salted caramel chocolate shortbread, please?-"

>

"- Keep the change- Sorry, Soph, what were you saying?"

"What did you do today?"

"Oh, that. I took my god-daughter to the zoo."

"..."

"Sophie?"

"..."

"You ok?"

"You have a god-daughter and you took her to the zoo?"

"Yes and yes."

"Really?"

"Is that so hard to believe?"

"Kinda. I thought you were a workaholic. Plus, I didn't know you had a god-daughter."

"I am a workaholic but for Nola, I can make an exception."

"Nola? Nice name. How old is she?"

"Six. A very busy six year old."

"I can't picture you hanging out with a kid."

"I can show you the selfies on my phone, if you need proof."

"Haha, you took selfies?"

"I didn't, Nola did. Whenever she's near a camera, she insists on taking pictures. She's inherited her mother's passion there."

"Her mum's a photographer? Will I have heard of her?"

"Maybe. Her name's Jenna Braddock."

"Jenna Braddock? No, I don't know- wait! She had an exhibition at the Tate Modern last year."

"That's her. Her art is... what would the word be?"

"Unique. Her work is unique."

"Now, you're just being too nice, Sophie."

"Her art isn't that bad, it's just an acquired taste."

"Her art is horrible! Honestly, how can it be classed as 'art?' That's just an insult to the great artists."

"I thought you were a cultured man, Daniel"

"I am, it's just-"

>

"Coffee's ready. Where the hell are you?"

"Almost there."

"You better be, otherwise your drink will be cold."

"I'm like a minute out, Daniel. Chill."

"Mhm."

"You can start without me, if you want."

"I'll wait."

"Cool. So, you and Nola went to the zoo?"

"She was off school sick today so I offered to babysit. By lunch time she was driving me up the wall so I took her to the zoo."

"I'm not a fan of zoos."

"Why not?"

"You know, animals locked in cages. I find it cruel. When I was younger, I went to a zoo and the lion there was pacing back and forth, shaking its head and looking extremely agitated. When I asked my dad why the lion was behaving like that, he told me that the lion was either bored or was suffering from anxiety because he wasn't in his natural habitat. Ever since, I've been against zoos."

"Well, now I feel bad for taking Nola there."

"You shouldn't. I'm sure she enjoyed, just don't try taking me to a zoo, that's all."

"Why would I want to take you to a zoo?"

"I dunno, but if you ever think, 'I'm gong to take Sophie to the zoo,' think again."

"You're weird."

"You're weird."

"I'm weird because you're weird."

"I'm weird because you're weird."

"Shut up, you sound like a school girl."

"Only in your perverted fantasies."

"Not even then. Where are you?"

"I'm literally around the corner. Patience, my friend."

"Power walk, then."

"Power walk? Haha, that's the best joke I've heard all day!"

"Power walk or I'm taking the biggest bite ever out of your muffin."

"Don't you dare touch my muffin!"

"I'm reaching over."

"I told you not to touch my bloody muffin! Do you have a death wish?"

"Ah, Sophie. You're here!"

"Yes, I am, now put the muffin back!"

"Chill, woman. Here have it."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"What?"

"Why are we still on the phone?"

"Um, I don't know, actually."

"Well, hang up."

"You hang up."

"I told you to hang up first."

"Jesus, you are weird. I thought it was an over-the-phone thing, but seeing you in person, you're just naturally weird."

"Daniel, I'm hanging up now."

"Your eyes are very blue."

"Oh, for God's-"