Daddy's Little Girl

Here's another chapter, to follow up from yesterday's BIG revelation.

So, to put it into perspective- Laurence was about 18/19 when Evelyn was born and she's about 46/47 now. So that means Laurence was over 60 when he died. If we work out the maths, he was in his thirties when Daniel was born, and even older when Sam was born.

Sarah, xx

~*~*~

Evelyn

"Here you go, love," Alistair says, kissing my temple as he slides a warm mug of coffee into my hands. I hadn't slept much last night after the reading of the Last Will and Testament and I'd kept Alistair awake with me. Looking at him and the way his eyes were hooded from sleep deprivation, I had to wonder if I looked equally as awful as him. "Drink up, Evie, because you look like shit."

"Ha ha," I retort, rolling my eyes at him. Sipping the coffee, I feel the caffeine hit me. "I was just thinking the same thing about you, anyhow, buttons."

The house was uncharacteristically quiet. After the revelation last night, Samuel had hit the roof and demanded to know everything, including how long Daniel, Connie and I had been keeping everything a secret from him. It had taken Jasmine hours to calm him down but I could still hear him creeping around last night, muttering to himself about how 'betrayed' he felt.

Veronica, too, hadn't taken the news well, especially considering I came out of the room wealthier than she had. She'd kicked up a fuss, demanding that a DNA test be carried out in order to prove my paternity, but as always, Connie was quick to intervene. As it happened, a DNA test had been taken twenty years ago that proved that Laurence was indeed my biological father. As it was incontestible, Veronica couldn't demand that the Last Will and Testament be void and that all assets be transferred to her.

"You have to hand it to the man," Jasmine Gough, Samuel's friend, commented dryly. "He certainly thought of every eventuality with this whole Will thing."

Indeed, he had. Once the reading was over, various items were distributed, including three yellowed envelopes that carried Laurence's scrawl on the front. One was addressed to my mother, Annette, while the other two were addressed to My Daughter and To Evelyn. The letters addressed to me were still left unopened and therefore, unread. Seeing them in front of me on the kitchen table, I had to wonder if I had the courage to open them and read the words Laurence had taken the time to write. Part of me knew I should read them, the other part of me not wanting to.

"What are you going to do with them?" A familiar voice asked from the doorway of the kitchen. Daniel, leaning against the frame, watched me carefully, a small smile creeping onto his features when I made eye contact with him. "C'mon, sis, I know there's a part of you that's dying to read them."

I flinched at hearing him refer to me as 'sis,' never having been called that before. Growing up as an only child, I hadn't been anyone's sister and ever since I came to the estate, I hadn't been Daniel and Samuel's sister then, either. All I've ever been to the boys is their nanny, a substitute mother figure; Hearing Daniel call me his sister was simply too much.

"No, Evie, don't cry," Daniel said in a panicked voice. I heard his footsteps pattering against the cold tiles as he rushed to my side, throwing his arms around me as he continued to speak. "I'm sorry, Evie. I won't call you that again unless you want me to. Please, don't cry."

I couldn't help the tears flowing down my cheek. When I'd arrived here, all those years ago, all I'd wanted was to meet Laurence, gain some answers to the questions that had plagued me for years, have closure and move on.

Instead, I gained a family in the boys and a somewhat friend and ally in Connie. As I was growing up, I'd dreamed of having siblings, but it never happened. Suddenly, in a second, I gained one very quiet, thoughtful brother and a wild, fearless brother, both of whom I adore with all my heart. There's nothing I wouldn't do for them.

"They're happy tears," I heard my husband tell Daniel. "She's usually a sobbing mess on the floor if they're sad tears."

There was a teasing undertone in Alistair's voice and I had to laugh. He was right; Whenever I was sad crying, I was a wreck and I could hardly move. It had been that way a fortnight ago when Connie had telephoned to break the news to me that Laurence had died. "Evelyn, darling, I am so terribly sorry, but I have bad news. Laurence has passed away."

I don't recall being as heartbroken as I'd been that day. For my entire life, all I'd wanted was to be accepted by Laurence, to be known as his kin, but that would never happen. With his passing, I thought that was it; No one would know my real identity.

But more than anything, my heart ached for Daniel and Samuel. Laurence, for all his faults, hadn't been a bad man. He'd been hurt, betrayed, made to be a man he never wanted to be. He had lived his adult life trying to rebel against the institution that had robbed him of his happiness. After being forced to leave my mother, pregnant and alone, Laurence had become disillusioned with his life and retaliated in the only way he knew how- he married the wrong woman, he drank heavily and he enjoyed the finer things in life far too much.

"What's going on?" Samuel's voice asked from the doorway. I chanced a look up at him, wondering what kind of mood he'd be in, and to my surprise, the wild-child looked rather cool, calm and collected. "Are we having a sort of sibling meeting that no one told me about? Not that it should surprise me. My siblings have a habit of not telling me things."

"Samuel-"

"It's whatever," Samuel shrugged, walking farther into the kitchen. He helped himself to some coffee and took a seat at the table opposite me. He shot Alistair a look. "Mind giving my brother, sister and I a few minutes?"

Alistair looked at me, seeking permission to leave. Feeling Daniel's hand squeeze my shoulder, I nodded at my husband and gave him my best smile. Alistair left then, but not before- unnecessarily- warning Samuel that he'd be sitting outside and that if Samuel even dared to speak to me in a way that was less than polite, he'd be back in the kitchen in a flash.

"Ali," I warned my husband. Giving him a shake of my head, I reprimanded him for the way he spoke and sent him on his way with a wave of my hand. Hearing the click of the door closing, I sigh. "Sometimes, it's like living with three children."

There was an awkward silence in the air as Samuel sat and stared at me, his eyes scanning every detail of my face. He kept a keen eye on me, stopping at my mouth, my nose, my jawline, my ears, my hair, my eyes... suddenly he frowned.

"Well, we have the same nose and the same ears," he finally said, relaxing his shoulders as he leaned back in his chair. "Your mouth and eyes are probably your mothers."

I nod. "That's what people tell me," I confirm. Unlike Daniel and Samuel, I don't have green eyes. Instead, I have blue eyes and blonde hair just like my mother had in her younger years. "How ae you coping with it? I mean, it can't have been easy to hear that I'm you... I was Laurence's daughter."

"You got that right," Samuel grumbled under his breath. When Daniel levelled a glare on him, Samuel sighed and sat upright, crossing his hands on the table in front of him. "Tell me again how the hell this happened."

"We've been through this, Samuel," Daniel said, running his hand over his weary face. "We went through this seven times last night."

"And we'll go over it for the eighth time today," the youngest of the two boys countered.

After Veronica made her dramatic exit last night, Samuel had insisted that we explain to him how it was possible that I was Laurence's daughter. I recounted the story first, followed by Connie's version of events, which shed some light on the situation, even for me. Between Connie and I, we tried to get Samuel to understand but no matter how many times I tried to explain it to him, he wouldn't listen.

"When Laurence was eighteen, he met my mother, Annette," I begin, just as my mother had when she sat down to tell me when I was eighteen myself. "They met over the summer when Mum was here visiting her own grandparents. It was a summer romance, I suppose, and they were young and stupid. Mum wasn't in the same class as Laurence but he didn't seem to care because he quickly fell in love with her. On their final evening together, they..." I trail off the story, sparing us all the details. "Mum sent letters to tell Laurence that she was pregnant and he wrote back saying that he would support her and would make an honest woman of her. Unfortunately, there were some things that were out of their control and Laurence had to break several of his promises."

Samuel nods to show he's following. "And then?"

"I was born," I continue. "Laurence never visited but he would send money every month, make sure that I was well educated and that there was a roof over our head. Mum married Joseph, the man I believed was my father, and I never knew differently until I turned eighteen myself."

"Why did you come to work for us? You obviously knew Laurence was our father and yours," Samuel countered, as he'd done so last night. "Were you trying to worm your way into our lives? Into his?"

"You know that's a lie," Daniel warned.

"I came here looking for Laurence," I say, tapping Daniel's hand to reassure him that I was ok with the line of questioning. I knew Samuel well enough to know that he was simply just being himself. There was no maliciousness in his words. "The day I arrived here, Connie was interviewing for a new nanny so she thought that was why I was here. She interviewed me and offered me the job. I was ready to turn it down, run away, not come back, but then this little tornado of a child came running through the room, stopped in front of me and promptly threw up all over me. After that first impression, how could I ever have left?"

My teasing made Samuel smile, although the smile didn't quite reach his features. Taking a breath, I say, "I couldn't leave. Knowing that I had two brothers made me want to stay," I explain. "I didn't want to worm my way into your life, that's why I never said anything about the fact that Laurence was my biological father. I could have. I wanted to, several time, but that wouldn't accomplish anything."

"What about the DNA test?" Samuel quizzed. "Why did you get that done?"

"I didn't," I shake my head at the accusation. "I didn't know anything about that."

"Laurence was the one who sent away for the DNA test," Daniel interrupts, looking at Samuel and I. "In the documents, it shows that it was Laurence who ordered the test."

With a sigh, I take a sip of my now lukewarm coffee. "He must have suspected," I reason. "I mean, I look like Annette, so maybe he worked it out that way. I was the right age, as well, so... I don't know. If he knew, why didn't he ever tell me? Why would he have... All I ever wanted was..."

At that, I break down. This time, it wasn't happy tears either. The tears came in uncontrollable sobs and my chest heaved each time I tried to take in a breath. The tightening of my chest was impossible to ignore and I could feel my heart racing as my body lost all sense of control. Before I knew it, however, strong arms were encircling me on both sides. Daniel had his arms around my waist, while around my shoulders, Samuel held me tightly.

"You should read the letters," Daniel instructs, pulling away from the embrace. "Laurence was a man of few words, so if he took the time to write a letter, you must have meant something to him."

"Yeah," Samuel agreed. "He never wrote either of us a letter. No need to ask which of his children was his favourite. The term 'Daddy's Girl' exists for a reason, after all. Read it, sis, and then come and find us. We've got some family bonding to do."

~*~*~

May 23rd, 1969

My daughter,

Please know, no matter what, that I have loved you every second since your mother told me that we were to have a child together. I cannot begin to express just how elated I was when I heard that I was to be a father and how heartbreaking it is that I will never be a part of your life.

I have made mistakes in my life, but you shall never be one of them. When I met your mother, yes I was young and idealistic, but I had responsibilities. None of that mattered, however, when Annette expressed her love for me. I would have given up everything in a heartbeat had circumstances been different. Maybe if I had a younger brother, I could have been your father in the way a dad is supposed to be there for his child.

I dreamed of watching as you learnt to walk, teaching you how to ride a bike, walking you down the aisle. I wanted to be the person you ran to when you fell and cut your knee. I wanted to be the person who would warn all the boys away. I wanted to be the person that could proudly tell the world, 'This is my daughter.' I wanted all that, and so much more.

Yet, it would never be so.

I will never be there to see you take your first steps. I will never be there to watch you ride a bike. I will never be there to see you marry. I cannot be that person for you, my darling daughter, and that will be one of my biggest regrets for as long as I shall live.

I have loved my, my sweet little girl, from the moment your heart began to beat and I will continue to do so until mine ceases. I shall carry you with me, forever, in my heart.

Your loving father,

Laurie.

~*~*~

August 8th, 1998

Dearest Evelyn,

Today, news that I have waited almost thirty years finally reached me.

When I first saw you two years ago at the family home, running around the garden with Dan and Sammy, I couldn't help but be taken aback at just how much you looked like the woman I have loved for over thirty years. You look exactly like Annette.

You have her blonde hair, her blue eyes, her infectious smile. It was as if I'd been transported back in time and for the briefest of moments, I truly believed I had. I cannot emphasise enough how happy I was to see all my children together, playing together and seeing the boys look up to you, just as I always hoped they would.

Since then, I have seen the way Dan has opened up to you, taking you into his confidence and thinking or you as the mother and older sister he never had. And Sammy? I cannot think of a single person on God's green Earth that can tame my youngest child quite in the way you can. Oh, Evelyn, the way they love you breaks my heart.

Had I been a better man, this would have been my reality, instead of just a fantasy that played out in my mind, over and over again.

This morning, a letter arrived. It was the results of a DNA test I had requested, without you knowledge. (I took a few strands of hair from your brush.) The results say that I am your father, Evelyn.

There are few things more precious in the world than a father's love for his daughter, and while I've thought this many times over the years, I can finally put my feelings into words.

I love you, Evelyn. I always have, and I always will. I hope, one day, I can be brave enough to tell you this. Until then, I thank you for coming into my life, into my sons' lives, and for making the world a happier place.

Love always, your father,

Laurie.

~*~*~

A/N

So, yeah... *goes to find a tissue*

Sarah xx