I Fucked Up

MARCELO

My head was spinning. An annoying light hit my face. Not only that, my stomach was churning. I wanted to vomit.

“Urg!” I slowly opened my eyes despite the pain the light caused me. My head felt like it had a drill in it. Finally, when I managed to wake up, my heart took a turn.

The first thing I saw was an unknown chandelier hanging from the ceiling. Where was I? I looked around and knew I was in a hotel room. I sat on the bed, leaning my elbows on my thighs, supporting my head.

This was not real. I couldn’t believe it. How did I get here?

And out of nowhere, the memories of the night before hit me like bricks. Slowly I turned my head to the other side of the bed. My lungs ran out of oxygen for a few moments as the air got stuck in my throat.

Silvana was lying on the bed naked. I looked down, and so was I. I closed my eyes, trying to contain the tremor that was generating within me. I could not believe what I had done.

Yesterday, leaving Raf’s building, Silvana and I went for a few drinks. We went to a nightclub in Manchester city center. My mood yesterday was very bad, so I didn’t think it was a bad idea to go out with her.

But as the night went on, and the drinks kept coming, I completely lost control. The place was heating up, and I ended up bringing her here to fuck her senseless.

I was grossed out by my actions. In my life, I could have never imagined doing something like this with this slut.

~What am I going to do? How will I face Mandy now? Oh! Mandy, Mandy.~

Silvana stretched and opened her eyes. The look she had said it all. Her dream had come true. She had finally had sex with Marcelo Walker. Slowly, she crawled toward me, wiggling her breasts.

She hugged me from behind and started kissing my neck, alternating little bites on my earlobe. I was so disgusted with myself, that I got up from the bed, pushing her aside.

Naked, I walked to the bathroom and closed the door slamming it shut. I got into the shower and washed my body as much as I could.

When I finished, I dried myself and tied the towel around my waist and went out to the room. Silvana had ordered breakfast using room service, because a cart with two plates was next to the door.

I ignored everything, grabbed my clothes off the floor, and got dressed.

“Aren’t you even going to have breakfast with me?” Silvana’s question made me turn in her direction.

She had a robe on, but her very presence disgusted me. How could I have sunk so low? How could I have done this to Mandy? I shook my head, disappointed in myself.

I grabbed my things and left the room. Walked out of the hotel and stopped in my tracks. In amazement, I saw how a horde of reporters started blinding me with their flashes.

The press was here, and they wanted a story. I hesitated for a moment but quickly recovered. I turned around and went back inside the hotel.

Then, I went to the underground car park and requested my car. “No, Mr. Walker, you did not arrive by car. A taxi brought you and your companion here.”

This could not be. I cursed my life at that moment. I was so drunk that I didn’t even know where I’d left it.

“Call a taxi, and tell him I’ll be waiting for him at the back entrance of the hotel.”

I took out fifty pounds and gave it to the boy for his help. I went to the entrance, but not without snatching the hat he was wearing. The boy said nothing as he rushed to do as he was told.

I put on the cap and waited patiently for the taxi to arrive. It didn’t take more than five minutes. I approached him and gave him my address. Twenty minutes later, I was home.

When I opened the door, Mandy came running toward me with her face full of concern. My shame did not allow me to see her face.

“Marce, are you okay? I was very worried. Why didn’t you answer your mobile? Where were you all night?”

Mandy reached out to hug me, but I backed away. I made the mistake of looking her in the eye, and the pain I caused her with my actions made me immediately regret it.

But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t force myself to be with her. Guilt was eating me, and I didn’t know how to handle it.

Ever since Mandy and I had become a couple many years ago, it had always been her and me. Nobody else. Yesterday, I had sullied and disgraced our relationship. I didn’t know if I could bear the guilt.

So, I did what seemed easiest to me. I left her standing there without giving her any explanation. I walked to our room and locked myself in.

Minutes later, I heard Mandy trying to open the door, but I had thrown the lock.

So, from the outside, she said, “Marce, please don’t lock me out. Talk to me. It is not good to lock yourself in the room alone. Marce, Marce, open the door.”

I stayed silent without answering her. I had failed her. I had failed my wife. And now I didn’t know what to do with the whirlwind that was forming inside me.

The next morning, I was woken up by the smell of food. I was very hungry. I hadn’t eaten anything yesterday, and all this angst was really getting to me.

Reluctantly, I got out of bed and headed to the bathroom. I washed my face and brushed my teeth. I got dressed and grabbed my keys. Then, I left the room and went downstairs.

I went to the kitchen and saw that Mandy was there. She was sitting at the table with two plates served with breakfast. When she heard me, she turned to see me.

I averted my eyes and walked toward the refrigerator without saying a single word. I pulled out a high-protein shake and left.

But before I got to the exit door, I heard Mandy break down in tears. The pull I felt in my heart, I pushed aside. I opened the door and left.