Chapter Seventeen

GABRIEL

I’m usually a sound sleeper. The only exception was when Ellie was in the hospital. I spent those nights by her side, catching quick naps in the chair.

Once she was out of the hospital, my body craved sleep, and I let it.

But tonight, I woke up in the early morning hours. My wolf was restless, which was unusual. He was only restless when Ellie was in the hospital. Even after all these years, he still saw her as his pup. His protectiveness only grew after our mate broke the bond.

Ellie was the reason he recovered. Many male wolves didn’t bounce back so easily. Especially if they had met their fated mate, and the bond had started to form.

~“Something’s wrong with our pup,”~ my wolf grumbled.

I rolled my eyes. I knew Ellie was hurting. She was still reeling from Elijah’s rejection and his death. But what hurt her more was the loss of her wolf.

In some ways, that was causing her more pain than losing her mate.

~“Check on her,”~ my wolf insisted.

I sighed, swung my legs out of bed, and grabbed a robe.

Running my fingers through my hair, I headed from my bedroom to Ellie’s.

As soon as I opened the door, I felt something was off. Even before I turned on the light. When I did, I saw the untouched bed and the open window.

I shook my head in disbelief.

Then I saw it. The envelope on the pillow. Ellie’s unmistakable handwriting. She’d never been a fan of schoolwork. She would rather be training than sitting in a classroom.

One single word written on the front of the envelope: ~Daddy~.

My heart clenched in my chest. This was too familiar. It reminded me of when Zagan had taken her, or the time she tried to run away.

I kicked myself. How could I not see this coming? I thought she needed time to heal, some space.

I ripped open the letter, hoping it would give some clue as to where she might be going. I prayed she wasn’t planning to cross the border to surrender to my father.

I knew Sammy’s death hit her hard, and now she had killed Elijah. I hoped she didn’t blame herself for it, because the only person to blame was my damn father.

He was the one who sacrificed Sammy, and he was the one who poisoned Elijah’s mind against Ellie.

If I had been there, it wouldn’t have happened, but my father knew that. That’s why he dumped me in the council’s dungeon.

I sighed, unfolded the piece of paper, and started to read.

~Dear Daddy~,

~I don’t know what hurts more. The fact that I killed my own mate, or that after reading this you will be disappointed in me. Truth is, I’m disappointed in myself.~

~You’ve done so much for me, sacrificed so much for me, including your own mate, and this is how I repay you.~

~Not only am I to blame for the loss of your two nephews, but also, if truth be told, your mate.~

~I probably deserve to lose my wolf.~

~That’s why I’m leaving. I can’t be here anymore. Every day I’m surrounded by memories of what I was. What I could have been. Knowing full well that I can never be that person again.~

~I am nothing more than an overgrown human. A mongrel without a wolf.~

~I know you said you didn’t care what I was, but I do.~

~I care that I won’t ever have my wolf again. I know everyone thinks she’s just sleeping, but I know different.~

~She’s gone, and who can blame her.~

~So, I have to leave. When I visited my brother, he didn’t want me to come back. He didn’t want me to risk myself in this war. I guess I should have listened.~

~If he hadn’t given me the knife, I would be dead. Maybe he knew something. Maybe he can see the future. Our grandmother was part witch, so maybe he is too.~

~Anyway, he’s planning an expedition, beyond the wall. I’ll join him. With everything that’s happened, it’s probably where I belong.~

~I hope you can forgive me someday. I will always love you. You will always be my daddy.~

~Love, Ellie~

~P.S. Please don’t try to follow me. And thank Clayton and Seth for everything. I will miss you all.~

My heart clenched as I read the letter. I shook my head. Ellie had always trusted me. Allowed me to help her through her past traumas.

“Why, Ellie?” I whispered.

I let out a heavy sigh. If she thought I wasn’t going to go after her, she was wrong.

I remembered the first time we made the crossing. She was nervous because she couldn’t swim. She could swim now, but in her human form, she wasn’t a strong swimmer.

That thought made me realize how she must be feeling without her wolf. She must be desperate if she was willing to make the dangerous crossing alone.

Desperate or foolish. I knew she wasn’t the latter. A bit reckless, maybe, but definitely not foolish.

I tried to mind-link Clayton, but got no response. I glanced at the clock. It was four in the morning. He was probably sleeping. But I couldn’t wait. We needed to send out a search party.

I closed the bedroom window and returned to my room to grab a sweatshirt and some joggers. I left the house and headed to the pack-house.

I was surprised that Clayton hadn’t built a new house for himself and Emma. Especially with a new pup on the way.

Maybe he was waiting for the war to end. If our enemy broke past our lines, once the fighting started, Emma would be safest in the pack-house.

Not that I expected hostilities to break out soon. With one of the largest council-controlled packs leaderless, the pack would be in chaos.

I knew my father well enough to know he wouldn’t let Elijah’s Beta take over. He hadn’t allowed Jason or Murdoch to take control of the pack after he’d gotten rid of me. Murdoch had told me as much.

My father probably thought they were both too traditional in their thinking. He was the opposite, with his radical beliefs and the extreme actions he took to uphold them.

I found myself wondering how he’d reacted to Elijah’s death. As much as I hated to admit it, Elijah’s death had done us a favor.

Without a recognized Alpha to guide them, they’d be scattered. The warriors wouldn’t be able to fight at their best, even if my father let Elijah’s Beta take over.

Lost in my thoughts, I arrived at the pack-house in no time. I made a beeline for Clayton’s quarters.

I didn’t visit often, but I remembered it from when I first got here. Ellie and I had stayed here for a bit before we moved into our own place.

I shook my head. The thought of living there without her was hard to imagine, which was kind of silly. If she’d found her mate in the pack, they’d probably want her to move in with them.

At least then, I’d get to see her every day. Now, if we didn’t find her, I might never see her again.

I pushed that thought to the back of my mind as I pounded on Clayton’s door.

When there was no answer, I pounded harder.

I heard Clayton grumble from the other side of the door before it swung open.

“Jesus, Gabriel! You’re going to wake Emma,” he growled.

I brushed past him and stepped into the apartment.

“Ellie’s gone. She’s trying to cross the lake by herself.”

I thrust the letter at him.

He took the letter and stumbled into the kitchen, flicking on a light.

As he read, he ran his fingers through his hair.

“Why didn’t we see this coming?” he groaned.

I sighed.

“You mean why didn’t ~I~ see this coming,” I corrected him.

He looked up from the letter and shook his head.

“No, Gabriel. We all missed it. We should’ve noticed she wasn’t doing well.”

Clayton let out a heavy sigh.

“Any idea when she left?”

I shook my head.

“I didn’t hear her. She climbed out the window. My wolf woke me up.”

I watched as Clayton’s eyes flashed black. He was mind-linking someone, probably Seth.

I mentally kicked myself. I should’ve tried linking Seth right away.

When his eyes returned to normal, he let out a sigh. It sounded almost like relief.

“Seth found her. She was by the shore.”

I swallowed hard.

“Is she... Is she okay?”

Clayton nodded.

“He stopped her before she could start crossing.”

I closed my eyes and let out a deep breath. I felt a wave of relief, but also a sense of dread. How was I going to help her through this, this time?