Chapter 17 | Guilt

Katherine's POV

Everyone piled into their own separate vehicles, myself included, as the sun began to slowly set behind the brush and trees.

My eyes were fixated on Stefan's gravesite, no memorial would be placed in his honor or even a tombstone symbolizing his resting place.

The Earth laid almost undisturbed, it was as if nobody had been there. As if nobody was buried beneath the surface.

The only task now was to stay quiet, stay out of the spotlight, and never speak of what had happened there.

Right now, in this moment, I was fine.

Our house had remained boxed up, and my plan was to still relocate to Boston. I was clinging to any amount of innocence I had left, trying to remain normal. Watching as the movers piled the last of the remaining boxes into the U-Haul brought a sudden wave of relief over me. Within a few hours I would be putting miles between myself and the unwanted memories.

I was doing a final walkthrough of the home that had built mine and Stefan's marriage from the beginning, silently reliving memories.

A sudden knock at the door broke me away from my train of thoughts, and it was to my surprise to see Detective Massey standing on the front porch. He had a smile across his face which made his double chin stick out far more than usual, and he brought with him a stack of files.

I felt my heart sink into the bottom depths of my stomach as I reached for the door knob, "Detective Massey, what a surprise! I would offer you a cup of coffee, but it's moving day."

He held up his hand stopping my words within their tracks, "Coffee is not necessary Katherine, it's you I wanted to talk to. The names you gave us, we interviewed every one of them. I wanted you to know that we have our eyes on someone."

A shockwave of guilt brushed over my spine, and the words he continued to say became inaudible. I tuned them out, and suddenly my urge to leave this town had faded. My mind quickly rushed over the thoughts of Chad, Melanie, Jeremy, and Callie.

Which one had said a little too much, shown too much guilt or motive?

They still didn't know I had given their names to the police, I was the reason the sight was set on them in the first place. The police didn't know I had recently conspired with them, I had murdered my husband and had assisted in his burial not even twenty four hours ago.

Detective Massey's farewell brought me back to reality, "My suggestion is to not go too far if you can, I'd imagine we are going to be making a break in the case very soon."

I looked at him questionably, "You have no leads to his last whereabouts, you have a few names and a dead chauffeur. How is that making a break in the case?"

"We have some people working inside the operation," his use of police terms was starting to infuriate me, "We have a location in mind, and we're sending out some cadaver dogs by morning. Do you have anything of Stefan's that he may recently have worn or even touched? It'll help the cadaver dogs pick up a scent if he was there recently."

As much as I wanted to turn Massey away, I couldn't. I was told to remain as natural and normal as possible. How normal would it be if the missing person's wife didn't release a piece of evidence to the police, something as simple as a shirt?

"Everything is boxed up," I began and saw the look of fury spreading across his face, "The boxes are over here, will you help me find something?"

He nodded his head and followed me up to the packed up U-Haul. I pulled out two boxes with Stefan's belongings, handing one over to Massey.

"One of these is nothing but his toiletries," my hands started aimlessly rustling through the contents of the box, "What do you think would work better, a toothbrush or a recently worn shirt?"

I held up a shirt of Stefan's, one I had refused to wash until his return before the events I had unfolded.

Detective Massey oddly held the shirt to his nose and took a big whiff, "It doesn't smell like any detergent, I would imagine this would be perfect."

He retreated from the U-Haul, and back onto the front porch. I watched as he placed the shirt into a clear evidence bag, taking a black sharpie and labeling it 'Monroe, S.' I repacked the remaining contents of the two boxes, placing them back where they had been stacked, and closed the U-Haul lift door behind me. Massey cued his eyes on me and watched as I carelessly walked my way back to the porch.

He began scanning the property, "When are you leaving?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "Part of me wants to stay, stick this out until it's over. Stefan had already made arrangements to be at our new house by the end of this week, part of me still wants to stick to it. Part of me is still hoping he comes home. Do you think he's out there Detective Massey?"

I managed to produce a few fake tears to add to the intensity of the moment, and watched Massey stroke his stubbled beard from the corner of my eye.

I knew he wanted to tell me what he thought I wanted to hear, but deep down he couldn't.

The authorities already had it set in that Stefan was no longer living, and they were right. They knew he had been murdered, along with Benji, the only question that remained:

Who did it?

"We are doing everything we can," he collected his belongings as he started to descend from our porch steps, "We have everyone in the precinct putting in their best efforts into locating Stefan, and bringing him home safely."

He continued making his way to his patrol car, leaving me theatrically sobbing on the front porch. I wiped the salty tears from my face as his patrol car backed out of the drive, I regained my composure as soon as I was certain I was out of his viewing range.

I settled myself into the driver's seat of the U-Haul taking in all of Massey's words. Telling me not to go far, they had their eyes on someone, and the entire department assisting with the investigation. How dedicated were they, would they really never stop until Stefan was found?

My hands rustled through the glove compartment, as much as I didn't want to I had to see Callie before I left. I felt it as my duty to forewarn her that Massey was getting close.

Where are you? I'm stopping by, be home. --Kat

I couldn't wait on a reply, not at a time like this. Not when all of our lives were on the line, I had to warn her so she could tell the others. I couldn't leave town and leave them hanging unknowingly from their own nooses.

Callie and Chad's vehicles were both parked outside of the apartment complex, and in a way I felt internally grateful to have both of them there at the same time.

Killing two birds with one stone.

I walked up the flights of stairs leading up to Callie's apartment, I could've took the elevator but I used the extra time to sort out my collection of thoughts.

Staring at the door, I listened to the inside conversations between Callie and Chad but all was silent. The only thing that could be heard was the slight static from the television.

I gave the door three swift knocks and heard footsteps trucking towards the door, it opened immediately and Chad stood there shirtless. His toned abs and muscles were glistening with traces of sweat, and the veins in his arms protruded.

His complexion was flushed red and his eyes scoped me skeptically, "What are you doing here?"

Callie rushed towards the door and pushed him to the side allowing for me to enter the threshold, "She texted me a few minutes ago, let her in."

He held up both hands in defeat, "I had no problem with her being here, was just wondering why she was here. We're supposed to be acting normal, going on with our everyday lives."

"Our normal lives," I began, "The two of you shouldn't be seeing each other, that alone is suspicious. He was your best friend, and you're sleeping with his mistress. I didn't come here to grill the two of you, but I need to talk to you."

I motioned for the two of them to follow me as I seated myself on Callie's sectional couch, "Massey came by and seen me today, and I'm glad he did. I'm on my way to Boston, you said to stay normal. Normal plans were to move to Boston. Massey told me I shouldn't go far, they have their eyes on someone. He needed something close to Stefan, said they were getting cadaver dogs out to a specific location."

A look of horror spread across Callie's face and Chad's head fell into his hands.

Callie barely gathered herself enough to speak, "What did you do? What did you tell him?"

I clasped my hands together in front of me intertwining my fingers, "That's why I'm here, I had no choice. I had to give him what he wanted, it would've looked really bad for Stefan's wife to refuse the head detective of the investigation a shirt or something simple. He said they had a suspect in mind, and I didn't tell you guys but I gave him your names."

Chad pounced off of the chair, his veins were protruding far worse than before. His face was turning a bright red, and it seemed at any moment he was going to burst.

Callie rushed to his aide in attempts to calm him down, "We have to hear her out, she's in this deeper than we are. Remember what she said, if this goes South she's taking the fall. Think of the baby Chad, don't fall apart on me now."

She rested his hand on her abdomen, and flutters of warmth swooped over me. For the first time I had seen the effect Callie had over Chad, and it was an unfamiliar scene.

Chad had been a womanizer since we were teenagers. He never had a solidified girlfriend, and he always made it known there wasn't a woman out there who could tame him enough into being a family man. The way he looked at Callie was different, he had met his match.

"I'm standing by what I said," I broke the silence within the room, "I killed Stefan, I'll go down for it. I'll take the blame for Benji too, it won't even look impossible. They could potentially take it easier on me than they would any of you, a scorned wife getting revenge on her husband. My prints are in Benji's car, and Stefan. I'm going to do whatever I can to ensure nobody has to worry about anything, just don't hate me for what I had to do."

Callie rushed over to me leaning my head onto her shoulders, "Nobody is blaming you, you did the right thing. You didn't have a choice, we just have to take this one day at a time. All of us."

I watched as she fixed her eyes on Chad who had calmed down quite a bit since Callie had consoled him, "Where do we go from here?"

I shrugged my shoulders, "The only thing we can do is go back to normal, like you said. If anything alarming happens, we meet up promptly. I'm moving so the only way for me to get in touch with you guys from here on is through Skype calls and texts. Keep it to a minimum. Everyone needs to watch their backs and surroundings, the entire precinct is dedicated to this case. I have a feeling this won't be over until someones behind bars."

I could see the worry spreading over Callie's face and Chad's eyes wouldn't leave the floor. It was a good day gone bad, for everyone in our group.

"I'll call the others, you get your ass to Boston. Call when you get there," she walked me to the door generously, though I could hear the crackling in her voice as she was on the verge of breaking down.

Chad had retreated to the bedroom, and the sound of him punching one of her walls rang off throughout the apartment causing Callie to jump from the startle.

I looked at her worryingly, "You will be alright, right?"

She nodded her head, "He's blowing off steam, normally he goes to the gym. This just came as a surprise to everyone."

I nodded my head as she reassured me, and closed the door as a sign of a farewell. The apartment remained silent, that reassured me enough that it was safe to leave. I trusted Chad, he would never harm a female but I didn't want his anger unexpectedly getting the best of him.

Seattle shrunk in the rearview mirror as I began the drive to Boston. My heart ached at the thought of everything I was leaving behind. The only things I was toting with me were the memories and the overpowering guilt that was weighing down on my chest. I hadn't felt remorse for anything I had done, not until now. I twirled my wedding ring and band around on their designated fingers, and I questioned why I still wore them. Little did everyone know, Stefan was dead. He wasn't coming back, and it was only a matter of time before the world knew the truth.