Chapter 4: Change is good

Chapter four: Change is good (Zach's POV)

Seeing her after so long was like reality punched me in the face. She looked so different now. Older, more graceful, prettier. Not the fifteen-year-old girl I left behind. But people change.

I did. And change is good. Or so they say. I changed a lot and it isn't for the better.

When I was shipped off to England, I knew it wasn't because of my actions, I wasn't doing anything to harm anyone, my parents could easily have disciplined me on their own, it was nothing they couldn't handle, they sent me off because they didn't want me to see their relationship cracking from within.

They sent me off, away from my friends, away from my family to a place where I knew nobody. They didn't even go drop me off, I went on my own. Going there really just fucked me up.

People were so different, some kids worse than they are here, some were better but none of them were better than the friends I grew up with. The two years that I spent there, I spent alone, no friends, no one to talk to, no one by my side. I wasn't used to that, I was used to having my friends around me all the time, I would tell Brett, Ellie, Nathan, Spencer, Ashley everything.

Mainly Brett and Ellie since I'd known them the longest.

I was the new kid, I got a lot of attention, I wasn't British like the other kids in there, that only made people notice me more. I only got attention from the girls over there.

An American boy in their posh British school.

Since nobody paid me any attention other than the ladies, I started paying attention to them in return. I thought I could find a friend like Ellie but I was just trying to convince myself that I didn't have a crush on her.

After a year there, I started sleeping around with girls. My demeanor changed drastically when I got there. It was like I didn't care about anything. And I genuinely didn't care. About anything.

I got mixed with the wrong people during my time there, got into smoking, sneaking out, breaking rules, breaking laws, vandalizing. It was different and it was wrong but I didn't care. I still don't.

I expected Ellie to be over it by now, and I expected myself to not care and it surprised me when I realized I did. I felt incredibly guilty for hurting her like that, but those weren't my intentions, I just have to move past it and that can only happen when she does too.

I just need to get her to start talking to me again. I know that she'll forgive me eventually, but I don't have the patience to tolerate her grudge.

"Where are you going?" my dad asked while I headed to the front door.

"For a walk," I replied before getting out of there. I walked past her house and turned the corner off our street, walking with no particular destination in mind. I was walking around aimlessly when my phone rang in my pocket. I pulled it out and answered. "Hello?"

"I'm with Nathan and Spencer at The Brew, you coming?" Brett asked.

"I'll be there in five," I said before hanging up.

The Brew is a coffee shop/diner near us, it was our hang out spot last I checked. I entered the places, the little bell jingling above me while I walked over to them. I sat down beside Brett, Nathan, and Spencer in front of me.

"So, how have you been? How was England?" Nathan asked.

"Fine, I'm just unpacking some stuff. It was fine," I shrugged.

"You seem different," Spencer said.

"People change," I shrugged once again.

"And change is good, come on guys, let's not interrogate him right now," Brett chuckled.

"We're not interrogating, just curious. How does it feel to be back?" Nathan asked.

"Different. It's like everything's changed. Everything seems worse than what it was when I left," I sighed.

"Everything is the same except for you and Ellie," Spencer said before Nathan smacked his arm. Seems like they weren't supposed to be talking about Ellie in front of me, which makes no sense because it's not like anything has happened.

"I don't expect her to talk to me right now, I'm surprised you guys are," I said.

"Of course we are," Brett patted my shoulder.

"So, how was it with me gone? What did you get up to?" I questioned. I was just trying to figure out if I missed anything that I should know and be cautious of.

"We've been the same, nothing changed," Spencer shrugged.

"Ellie did," Nathan said.

Brett sighed, holding his head in his hands.

My brows furrowed while I waited for someone to explain a little more. "What are you talking about?" I asked in confusion. I looked between Brett and Nathan.

Brett was shooting daggers at Nathan, daring him to utter another word.

"Shouldn't he know?" Nathan mumbled.

"It's not our place to tell him, she'll tell him if she wants," Brett responded with an agitated huff.

"Tell me what? Brett?" I turned to him.

"Idiot," Spencer muttered to Nathan. They left right away after that.

"Brett," I groaned. I was running out of patience and getting annoyed.

"I should not be the person telling you this," he sighed, "If you wanna know, you should ask her. You should ask her, it'll show her you care too, maybe she'll start talking to you then," he shrugged.

"Brett." I gave him a pointed look.

"Do you remember James?" he asked.

"The basketball guy? Yeah," I nodded.

"He and Ellie had a thing, like a year ago," he began, "They were going out, I don't know, they were dating, I think, no one's sure. She didn't say much. But he kind of cheated on her, I guess, and she completely lost herself. She became so different after that, so much quieter, more solemn, more distant with everyone.

He basically broke her heart, and before that when you left-" he hesitated, "That kind of broke her heart too. And then James did the same thing all over again. So she just- I don't know- she's different now. She's not the Ellie she was last time you were here. I don't know much, you'll have to ask her if you wanna know more," he huffed.

I stared ahead while my jaw clenched and unclenched.

"He isn't even here anymore, he left at the end of last year," Brett added.

"He really cheated on her?" I scoffed. He nodded while staring at the table. "Did he at least apologize?" I questioned.

"Nathan and I made him," he shrugged, "I broke my finger doing that, hurt like a bitch," he said while glancing at his pinky that he had broken during the fight.

I remember him telling me that he got into a fight but he wouldn't tell me who it was with or what it was about.

"Just out of curiosity, why are you always so worried about her?" he asked.

"I'm not," I shrugged indifferently.

He gave me a blank look. "I'm not stupid. Every time we spoke, she was the first person you asked about. Always."

I sighed, running my hand through my hair. "We've always been friends, the three of us, you know she's different. She needs to be taken care of. She gets attached too quickly, trusts too quickly, she's gullible and she puts herself in vulnerable situations, someone needs to check on her," I shrugged my shoulder.

"All of us were here to do that. You were in a whole different country, and every time you were allowed a phone call, it was about her," he chuckled.

"What are you saying?" I lifted a brow at him.

"I'm not saying anything, just that you haven't changed. At least when it comes to her."

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

I kicked an empty can on the walk back home. I was staring at the pavement, thinking about what Brett had told me. It pissed me off beyond belief that James did that to her.

Especially considering that they were together, they were dating, in a couple, exclusive. It's just disrespectful now, isn't it?

I know what you're thinking.

I sleep around with girls and I'm out there talking about respect. There's a difference between respecting girls and using them, and just because I sleep with girls doesn't mean I disrespect them or treat them wrongly.

The girls are fully aware of the fact that it is a one-time thing, and the ones who don't, I let them down as nicely as possible. I'm not a dick. Most of the time.

I can be when I need to or want to but I for one don't like knowing that I disrespected or hurt a girl. Like I hurt Ellie.

Speaking of, she was stepping out and taking out her trash when she saw me. I watched her for a while.

She looked at me weirdly before walking back into her house.

Her nose still scrunched up when she was confused.

.

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Chapter four

I'm not paying any attention to my classes, this is not good.

Next Chapter: Thrill

Sneak peek: Ellie wants a change. Ellie wants excitement. Ellie wants to get over her painful past and move on. She wants to fall in love.