Chapter 19 - He was a fake pheasant

Proofread by Zhu Yuan

After hearing the emperor’s words, I totally forgot to tell him on Bai Qingqing. I held his hand tightly in mine to express my gratitude and then rushed to Doushuai Palace of Daode Tianzun.

That was probably the first time for me to run so fast. I didn’t run at that speed even when Bai Xiaoshan and I were chased by Bai Qingqing.

Soon I arrived at Doushuai Palace and went swiftly into it, without noticing whether there were any guards at the gate.

When I passed by a vast lawn, I saw an old man with white hair and beard sitting on a black ox. He bent his head down and his hands fumbled about on the ox’s skin. I had no idea what he was doing.

I guessed that he must be Daode Tianzun mentioned by Emperor of Donghua. I looked around and found that the palace was quite spacious. It was almost impossible for me to find Bai Xiaoshan by myself. In order to save my time, I walked towards the old man.

“What are you doing?” I asked him with curiosity.

“I’m delousing the ox.” He answered me straightforwardly, even without looking at me.

I was confused: “Is there any louse in heaven?”

“No!” He answered, his hand fumbling around without any stop.

“Then why are you delousing the ox?” I walked closer to the ox and asked. As I opened my mouth, the ox raised his head and snorted at me with his nostrils towards the sky. For fear of being attacked, I stepped back involuntarily.

“It is so boring to make pills of immortality! I have to find something as a hobby!” He replied naturally.

I was surprised. Daode Tianzun was indeed out of the common run, and even his hobby was so special.

As I was looking at him with admiration in my eyes, he found something awkward and suddenly looked at me. He stared at me for a long time and his rosy cheeks with white beard showed a hint of embarrassment.

I gradually calmed myself down and stared at him, not knowing what to say at that moment.

After a while, Daode Tianzun narrowed his eyes and suddenly became cheerful. He looked at me happily and said: “I didn’t expect that to be you, Bai! I heard you were back long time ago! You should have come to see me earlier! Why are you here today?”

I was totally puzzled by the intimacy in his words. But I must be the girl he called “Bai”. I opened my mouth and uttered: “I…”

“As long as you’re back now, I feel relieved. Come here and delouse the ox together with me! You haven’t done that for me for 2000 years! He said to me and laughed, looking at me affably and sincerely.

I knew that people should pay their respect to the elderly, so I headed towards the ox and started to delouse it with him. As a matter of fact, we didn’t catch any louse. Therefore, I had to sigh again that Daode Tianzun’s hobby was so special.

After I pretended that I’d crushed louses for about 100 times, he finally put an end to the activity. He jumped down from the ox in high spirits and patted it on its bottom. The ox leaped towards the sky and then disappeared.

“You are still so interesting! Today we’ve found far more louses than what I caught by myself yesterday.” He stroked his beard, smiled and said.

I twisted my mouth and wanted to ask him where Bai Xiaoshan was, but he had headed for the alchemy room with his walking stick.

I followed him up and asked: “Your Majesty, I heard that there is a new fairy in your palace!”

“Well, are you talking about the spring chicken who helps me to make my pills?” He answered leisurely.

I was shocked: “He must be a pheasant! Not a spring chicken!”

“What pheasant? He is definitely a spring chicken!” He said without looking at me.

“Your Majesty! I have told you that my name is Spring! That doesn’t mean that I’m a spring chicken!” At that moment, a ball of fire moved towards us. My mind suddenly went blank and I didn’t know what to do.

Daode Tianzun lifted his stick up and the ball of fire suddenly turned around, flew inwardly and stopped right in front of the oven.

“You spring chicken, if you dare to waste my magical fire again, I’ll put you into the oven!” He was shouting angrily at a young man sitting by the door with his hands on his hips.

The ball of fire scared me and my hands kept sweating for a long time. After a while, when I lifted my head, the young man became tame. He twisted his mouth and explained to Daode Tianzun with grievance: “Your Majesty, my name is Spring! And I am a pheasant! Not a spring chicken!”

Daode Tianzun gave a snort of contempt, turned around and looked at me with a childish smile: “Bai, I’ve just got a pill for beauty. You can take it since you came back with such a face!”

I tried to ignore his contempt for my appearance, so I headed straight toward Spring, who was still immersed in grief. I stared at him and said: “You! Change back to be the pheasant!”

Maybe he was frightened by my stern expression, he changed to be a pheasant obediently. But I didn’t think he was a pheasant. He looked like a pheasant somehow, but he was way uglier than Bai Xiaoshan. I was depressed and angry, so I rushed to him and scratched him while crying: “You’re a fake pheasant! A fake pheasant! Bai Xiaoshan is more beautiful than you! Why do you pretend to be a pheasant? You’re not a qualified fairy!

The alchemy room was indeed a mess when I tried to catch Spring and beat him. Daode Tianzun was also surprised by my craziness. As I was going to tear out all his feathers, Daode Tianzun stopped me and asked me seriously: “What’s wrong, Bai?”

I waited for Spring to change back to the human form and then charged him while crying: “He’s not a pheasant! You’re fooled by him!”

Spring flushed when he heard my words. He shouted with great anger: “I’m a pheasant! An authentic pheasant! How dare you deny this fact!”

“That’s right. Bai, he is a pheasant. Why are you insisting that he isn’t?” He looked at me with puzzlement in his eyes.

I sobbed for a while and said: “He is so ugly, but the pheasant I know named Bai Xiaoshan is far better-looking than him.”

“Are you sure that Bai Xiaoshan is also a pheasant?” Daode Tianzun continued to ask.

I nodded and stared at Spring.

Spring twisted his mouth, flung himself down around Daode Tianzun’s feet and cried: “You have to help me this time! She’s such a bully!”

Daode Tianzun looked at me with embarrassment. He gave a dry cough and said: “Bai, although I also don’t think this spring chicken is beautiful enough, he is indeed the best-looking member in his family. You know, it is difficult for pheasants to look good. And you should understand this.”

“But Bai Xiaoshan was better-looking than him.” I muttered. “His feathers are extremely beautiful and they’ll shine under the sun!”

“Ugh! I’ve never met a pheasant like that!” Spring got up and said.

“You!” I stared at him again and he stepped back out of fear. But he was still shouting: “You’re definitely not talking about a pheasant! I’m the most beautiful member in my family and you can never find another pheasant more charming than I am, unless what you met was a phoenix!”

“A phoenix? What does a phoenix look like?” I had never met a phoenix in my life so I didn’t know whether he was right.”

“Look! There is a portrait of a phoenix on the wall! It is the most beautiful bird in the world!” Spring pointed at the paint and said to me.

I looked at the portrait and suddenly claimed: “That is Bai Xiaoshan! Look! He is way more charming than Spring!”

But no one answered me.

As I turned back, I saw Spring and Daode Tianzun looking at me with sympathy.

“Why do you look at me like this?” I was puzzled.

Daode Tianzun shook his head and told me: “Bai, that is a phoenix!”

“I’ve told you that I am the most charming pheasant in the family!” Spring twisted his mouth and looked at me with contempt.

I was confused and then thought about their words for a long time. I asked: “Do you mean that Bai Xiaoshan is a phoenix?”

They nodded heavily.

“That’s impossible!” I denied it immediately. “I’ve known Bai Xiaoshan for almost 2000 years and I certainly know that he is a pheasant, and even he himself admitted it.”

“Bai, nothing is impossible!” Daode Tianzun patted me on my shoulder and said sincerely.

Spring began to look up at the sky and sighed slowly: “When I hadn’t taken the human shape, once upon a time, while I was eating, a beautiful pheasant suddenly appeared and tried to rob me of my food. He might have his head knocked and didn’t know whom himself was. He asked me what demon he was. At that time, I was still young. I thought he was only a good-looking pheasant, so I told him that he must be a pheasant.  I even warned him that we pheasants must be careful not to be caught by foxes, or we would definitely be killed by them! The child was very honest, so I gave him all my food! At that time, I thought, it was lucky for the pheasant family to have such a sincere child. Till hundreds of years later when I took the human shape and went to a broader world, I realized that the child was not a pheasant but a phoenix! Gee, it was a pity that a child who liked rice so much was not a pheasant! ”

When he finished the speech, he looked up at the sky again and then turned to look at us.

I pursed my lips and squeezed my fingers into a fist. I couldn’t help but rush towards him. “I’m gonna kill you! You sinister pheasant! You should apologize to Bai Xiaoshan!”