Two

The North Agency is situated in a big building that looks like nothing from the outside, seeming more like an abandoned place, but once you get inside, your vision changes. If anybody from the outside world would enter the building—although the chances for someone capable of entering are very low—they would not be able to actually find the Agency's headquarters.

The Agency is separated into different sections. The first floor, where there's the entrance, all the computers and screens in one big room, Neil's office and all the technological stuff. The second floor is where there are the more than enough training rooms and a big area where most of the agents usually get ready for a mission, all the equipment and weapons there. This is obviously my favorite part of the Agency.

Another room is reserved for the agents that get injured during their missions, a small version of a hospital.

The third floor is where are the dorm rooms. I still have a room here, but at the age of eighteen, I decided to find my own apartment not so far from the Agency. Neil didn't mind. It was my choice and I had my reasons.

Sometimes, I sleep in my room if I am too exhausted to go back to my apartment. I usually hate these moments. I hate the memories my room brings me.

But anyway, that's a story for later, I guess.

There are more rooms that I pass, like the cafeteria, which is obviously my second favorite part of the quarters, but the North Agency is basically this.

This is my home, really. I always felt isolated from the outside world. The real world. But my life has nothing to do with anyone outside the Agency. I can't help to feel glad sometimes, though. The world is bad, the people are mostly bad, too, and nobody seems to care or to realize until you have to face it.

The North Agency is an agency that trains people of all ages. There are kids, teenagers, and adults. Kids who lost their family, kids who didn't have any home anymore, were brought here to start a new life. To become stronger, and to find what they really want to do. All these kids have something in common and they know it. Then, the kids become teenagers, and slowly, they become adults. Just like me.

Everyone here has a story and is here for a reason. I don't think I've met anyone here who hasn't lost someone, for example.

That's sad. But it's life and just like a bullet, you don't always have time to dodge it.

I'm considering for a moment to stay in my bed all day— something I haven't done in a while now when my phone buzzes on my nightstand.

I roll onto my stomach, grab my phone and stiffen.

Shit.

Looking at Britt's text, any guilt I would have felt—the old me would have felt four years ago—is gone, and even though it slowly makes the lump in my throat get bigger, I force myself to ignore it.

I finally write a short answer.

She replies two seconds later, and I grit my teeth.

Garry. Why did he have to open his mouth?

I let out a sigh as I stare at my ceiling. A moment passes before my phone buzzes again in my hand and I look at it carefully.

I drop the phone on my bed, tightening my hands into fists.

Britt has always been smart, anyway. She knows me, or better—she knows what I'm trying to do. For the past four years or so, pushing people away is all I've done.

I don't want to get close to anybody. I don't want friends—I'm better alone. Something that I've tried to explain to Mr. Neil, but obviously, he didn't care when he told Andrew to be my partner.

Britt is probably the only person that still tries to talk to me, that still wants to be in my life. I don't know why, though.

She'll regret it, sooner or later.

I tried to push her away, but it didn't work. She's still here, ignoring my efforts for pushing her away. Why is she that stubborn?

So are you, Sophia.

I grumble. Shut up, you stupid inner voice.

Taking a deep breath, I look at my phone laying in front of me. Britt didn't write anything else, and something weird happens to me when I see that.

It won't kill you to accept some company, for once. A friend.

Yeah, but it will kill her.

That's what happens to people close to me.

They die.

*

I already regret it.

I stare at my tea in front of me, not being a big fan of coffee, and wait for her to say something. I'm definitely not the one who's going to speak up.

She's the one who wanted this. I didn't want. I really didn't want to.

I take a moment to look around me, not feeling good with so many people in the coffee shop. Or maybe it's because this café brings too many memories too, but let's not go there.

My reflexes as an agent come naturally to me as an old woman walks past us and clumsily drops her muffin and her water bottle. I'm able to catch those and Britt catches the keys the woman had a trembly hold onto seconds ago.

The old lady lets out a surprised sound and glances down at us in surprise, the wrinkles around her big blue eyes and her gray hair tied into a bun being the first things I notice.

"Oh, thank you, dear," she says and turns towards Britt, who gives her back her keys. "Thank you."

I smile and watch as she disappears from my view.

My eyes meet Britt's ones, and I stiffen.

"What?" I ask carefully, realizing that I finally did what she wanted. I talked.

Britt raises an eyebrow, slowly taking a sip of her coffee. Her dark skin, her dark brown eyes, her flat black long hair, and the way she can dress in bright colors and always looking amazing, can catch anyone's attention. Unlike me, she seems just like anybody else, just like a human being in this world.

Britt Leigh is a part of the North Agency, just like me. She's one year older than me and was found at eleven, and we'd been friends ever since.

I don't know how it happened, though. When Garry found me at eight, my whole life changed. Gone the little, innocent girl. My life was completely different from the moment my father killed my mother and I had to run away. And so, I wasn't a talkative child. People would say I was shy, but honestly, I think they were also afraid of me.

Somehow, I scared them at eight. I can't blame them, though. I wasn't very nice, too. Beside Garry, I didn't want to talk to anyone.

Just like today.

I was scared, I felt alone. I wanted my mom and she was gone.

Then, two years after I arrived at the North Agency, Britt came. And this black girl talked to me, and I soon let my walls down and talked to her, too. Slowly, I tried to be nice to this girl as she was nice to me. I tried to make a friend.

Today, I regret it.

She specializes herself in everything related to computers and technologies. Hacking is her thing.

Mine is fighting and it has always been. I wanted to be strong. Smart too, but being strong was my first goal.

Andrew occupied the same position as Britt before he was asked to go with me on missions. I would gladly have accepted if Britt was asked to be my partner instead of Andrew. Ugh.

But then again, I think about it, and realize that it would have been worse.

Britt brings me back to reality when she sets down her coffee and crosses her arms, smirking.

"You do care," she states in that way of hers, her voice clear and direct.

It takes me a moment to understand her words. I finally narrow my eyes at her.

"Shut up," I mutter under my breath and takes a sip of my freaking hot tea.

Too hot. My tongue already regrets it and I look away, out the window at the people walking on the street.

"Did you do something to your hair?" Britt continues, changing the subject easily. "You look amazing."

I look down at my hair, brushing my fingers through them. My hair is a dark brown, a bit wavy when they're natural. Nothing so special about it.

Glancing up at Britt, I shrug.

"No, I did not," I say. "It's just longer."

"Probably haven't realized. It's been forever since you just sat with me, discussing," Britt snaps back, and I don't flinch. Neither does she, and I realize it's going to be way harder to push her away.

I swallow and take a deep breath.

"I'm busy."

"Are you? Or you just try your best to pretend like I don't exist? So it can be easier for you."

This time, I glare at her.

"Britt, I'm very busy, okay? Things are getting crazier at the moment. The missions are... different. It takes me time."

Britt narrows her eyes and bites on her lip, searching for the lies.

She won't find any of that. I'm a trained agent. I'm pretty good at lying. Or I like to think so. Not a lot of people can notice when I lie.

Although I'm not really lying, since what I said about the missions is true. But me trying my best to avoid her and to keep me busy so she can't do something like today?

That's the part I'm not voicing out loud. I don't need to, though, because Britt is smart enough and she already knows all of that.

"Soph," she says softly, her eyes meeting mine. "Are you okay?"

I blink, trying to understand how we ended up here.

Did she just ask me if I was... okay?

I look out of the window again, thinking of what to say.

What about the truth, for once?

Sure. If only I knew what it is exactly.

Finally, I shake my head and go for the traditional answer.

"I'm fine," I answer.

Britt stays silent for a moment before she narrows her eyes and shakes her head.

"You're not fine. You pretend to be," she states, meeting my gaze.

I scoff, frowning at her.

"What's the difference? Why does it matter?" I say, earning a surprised look on her face. "Come on Britt, look around you! Everyone is pretending. You know why? Because that's life. Life goes on and you don't have time to cry about how miserable your life can be."

I feel almost out of breath at the end, and I take a quick sip of my tea, ready to get up and move on.

"Sophia, please," Britt's voice stops me in my track, startling me.

I close my eyes, feeling like my walls are not up enough, like she could climb them any moments now. This is my mistake of ever letting her closer to me, letting myself have a friend.

"I'm still your best friend. You can talk to me, always. I know things have been hard, but I'm here. Always. You're my favorite girl, okay? And I hate seeing you like that. It pisses me off that you try to ignore me when you clearly know how useless it is. I won't let you down, Soph."

Muttering under my breath, I slowly turn back around and swear that I'm doing a huge mistake.

"I don't deserve it," I mutter, sitting back down on my chair.

Britt smiles happily and it hits me how I really did hurt her. But I can't let that affect me.

"That's why you're lucky I love you, you stubborn bitch," she snorts, smirking.

I narrow my eyes. "Don't love me."

She shrugs. "Oops. Too bad, I guess."

I shake my head, staying quiet. I can feel Britt's eyes on me, watching my every move.

"You're afraid of that, aren't you?" she finally says in a soft tone.

Blinking, I meet her gaze.

"Of course I am," I reply without thinking.

"All because of B—"

My head turns towards her quickly, my cold glare shutting her up.

"Don't," I warn, my heartbeat increasing. "Don't say his name."

She presses her lips in a thin line, nodding.

A few seconds pass before she does the mistake of talking again.

"I miss him too—"

"Britt, I swear to God—"

My phone buzzing in my pocket interrupt us and I let out a sigh of relief.

Thank God.

I stand up, glancing at Britt.

"Gotta go," I say and she nods, standing up too.

When she follows me, I shake my head.

"You don't have to follow me, Britt."

"I have things to do at the N.A, too," she only replies, ignoring me.

I nod briefly and we both make our way to the exit like nothing ever happened.

Like she hadn't talked about the one person I didn't voice the name out loud since four years.

*

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