Modern Problems

- I'm unoriginal but it's ok

- The Winstons meet the 21st century

- Dallas was born in November of 2004, Hannah in may of 2006, Buck in August of 2000

- Buck was the only kid in the neighbourhood with a cell phone

- it was a 1997 Nokia

- Verna and Charlie still suck

- Ok, I don't know if I can say Verna sucks... I'm conflicted about my own characters

- Anyway! Dal still gets caught by the police after trying to steal some Tylenol for Hannah

- But he's kicking and screaming about how his sister is sick

- And since he's...like ten or something, cps gets involved

- Safe to stay the conditions were pretty terrible

- By the time they get to the apartment Hannah is crying and Verna is still sitting on the bed with her, holding her hair back while shes crying and throwing up

- They end up in five foster homes over two years before they're separated :(

- BUT they find each other again because they were in the same school

- Both their foster families suck

- So Dallas decides they're gonna run away

- He walks Hannah home from school and tells her to pack a bag and hide it

- "We're gonna go find Buck, okay? I'll see you tonight."

- Haha sike

- Its damn near three in the morning and Dal is on his way to Hannah's

- And then there's Dominic.

- 🔪🔪🔪 if yk what I mean

- So instead of getting Hannah, he gets scared and runs away to Tulsa

- Anyway

- Because the laws are a lot stricter nowadays, Dal and Hannah don't live in the bar

- Buck has a house across the street and the Winstons have the basement suite

- Bedroom, living room, bathroom and kitchenette

- Who gets the bed depends on who gets home first

- It's gotten to the point where Dallas will turn the light on at four in the morning and stand in the doorway so when Hannah gets up to turn off the light he pushes her out of the room and locks the door

- The Dingo is essentially a Denny's

- Sylvia works at Hooters, you can not convince me otherwise

- and she's still hot af

- I feel like Two-Bit would work at a 7/11 or something for extra cash

- Hannah has a stolen iPhone 7

- and has blocked her brother on every piece of social media

- But she still goes onto his posts and cyberbullies him

- it'll be a picture of him and Tim smoking or something with a really stupid caption

- and one comment

- "Mom should have swallowed you when she had the chance."

- Even funnier when they're both at home and all Buck hears is-

- "I shoulda thrown you out the fucking window when I had the chance!"

- Buck has them both on find my phone

- Same with Darry and the rest of the gang

- Communal Spotify

- Buck signs himself up to be Hannah's legal guardian <3

- Because if she got in any more trouble cps would take her away again <3

- Darry was the one to help him figure out all the paperwork

- Ponyboy was very confused to come home and see Buck Merril filing his taxes at his kitchen table

- But he gets approved for whatever reason! :D

- Things are going well

- Until Hannah brings home a slip of paper and asks him to sign it

- "What's this for? Field trip? PG-13 movie at school? Sex ed???"

- "Birth control."

- Cue Dallas yelling from the basement

- "Why the fuck is Ponyboy not using a condom?!"

-  Sylvia defends for her tho <333

- "Get in loser, we're going to planned parenthood!"

- They stop at DQ afterwards

- Pony and Hannah got part-time jobs at a bowling alley

- almost said blowing alley

- Pony has airpods and a Spotify account so that's all they listen to

- "HEY LOVER WON"T YOU TREAT ME RIGHT, BE WITH ME TONIGHT, JUST GIVE ME-"

- "you're singing out loud again, pone."

- Hannah prefers having music in her right and Pony prefers his left so it works out :)

- Curly shows up almost every time they work

- I know it in my soul this boy has tiktok

- I also know pony is his only follower because Hannah refuses to get tiktok

- she knows pony will show her all the funny ones anyway

- Sometimes he's high as a kite, other times selling weed in the bathrooms

- Their boss has chased Curly off the premises with a broom

- they talk shit about their boss a lot

- Buck also sells questionable substances out of the bar with Tim

- Dallas does a lot of odd jobs around town

- Also friends with the police chief's daughter on Snapchat

- And he uses it to his full advantage

- Communal Netflix and Disney+

- I feel like Ponyboy likes Lady and the Tramp

- Dallas likes The Black Cauldron

- Darry's favourite is Robin Hood

- mine too bb

- They have so many group chats

- Dallas and Hannah could be screaming at each other in the Curtis living room and then send memes like nothing is wrong in the "Dally, Hannah, Curly, Tim, Buck" group chat

- Hannah has Dallas as Houston in her phone

- Hannah will just text him and say "houston, we have a problem."

- That pretty much just means "how much is in the bail-me-out fund?"

- Dal has her as dumb blonde or ginger

- It changes depending on how pissed he is

- If he gets arrested, he'll send her a picture of either the squad car "Mike says hey."

- or the guy in the holding cell with him "this is Gavin, he's addicted to heroin."

- Every piece of brand clothing came from a thrift store

- Most of their clothes in general

- Hannah got a pair of rollerblades for $12.75

- Curly has a skateboard, I don't make the rules

- sometimes they tie a skipping rope to the back of Pony's bike and make him pull them to school

- "C'mon Pony, I'll give you a carrot when we get to school, :)"

- And Pony just swerves for the fuckin ditch

- I'm sorry but I can see them watching Outer Banks and bein like

- "Socio-economic conflict between teenagers? What is this unrealistic piece of-"

- and then Bob sheldon gets a lil too close and they're all like

- "Oh. right."