• back seats •

(chill chapter before it descends to chaos)

akito pov //

I have one thorn left. I've cracked it.

It's not based on time, it's based on my interactions with Toya.

What if- What if I just- I just don't be around him?

Just not have anything to do with him.

Oh my god. I know what I have to do now.

Looking at him next to me, it makes me feel bad. He's rested on my shoulder. I slide out from next to him as I pick him up and rest him on his bed, tucking the covers over him.

I smile, tears in my eyes.

"I love you, Toya." I whisper, my hand cupping his cheek as I sit next to his sleeping body. An looked at me sadly, before diverting her gaze away.

He's so pretty. Something nobody else could ever match up to.

I feel a sting in my throat and fear makes me snap my head and thoughts away, the pain easing out.

"I'm going home. Tell him that if you end up staying." I nod to Kohane and An, before I open his window and leave, walking home.

It picks up to a fast pace jog, then a run. I swear I feel my tears catching with the wind, gently gliding across my temple instead of down my cheeks.

I burst through the door and run up to my room, closing the door as I lock it.

I cant see him anymore. It'll kill me.

But-

I'd die for him.

I rub my eyes frustratedly, groaning as I get into my bed, unsure of what else to do other than sleep.

Resting my eyes, I manage to get a somewhat nap in.

I wake up and groan my eyes groggily, seing my phone blown up. I sigh irritably and check it, messages from Toya, and An. Kohane was with her so she didn't need to message.

(An) dude are u alive you can't js not respond you're on the brink of death

(An) respond respond respond respond respond

(An) reply reply

(An) reply

(An) reply

(An) akito if i find your ass dead im going to be mad at you

(An) reply

(A) oh my god shut the fuck UP

(A) i was sleeping

(An) L

(An) sorry

(A) kill yourself affectionately

(An) i feel bad now

(A) mhm good

I check Toyas messages, blinking hard as I look through them.

(T) an and kohane said you went home

(T) i thought you wouldve stayed i was comfy :(

(A) im sorry

(T) heyy 😋

I'm trembling, my nostrils flared slightly.

(A) hello

(T) everything okay?

(A) yeah

(T) ughhhh can you come back im super bored

(T) i want to hug you so bad

I jam my eyes shut and put my phone away, ignoring his messages.

(T) ??

(T) just say no it's fine LMAO

(T) i know how tired you've been recently

"Shut up. Shut up shut up!" I grab the sides of my head and slam my phone on the table, crying.

I don't love Toya.

I don't.

I don't love him.

Fuck! Stop it. Just stop loving him. It's not that hard.

I sigh and rub my eyes, checking the time. 8pm.

I'll try and sleep till my school alarm. I haven't had a good nights rest in ages.

I lay back down and hug a pillow, nuzzling my nose and lips into it. I wish it was Toya.

My mind always wonders back, no matter what or when, to him. I can't do anything to stop it.

I sniff in and look down as I gently rest my eyelids, happy to discover I slept the entire time.

I slam my fist onto my phone as it chimes loudly, blinking awake. I sit up and stretch out, licking my lips as I chew on them, bored.

I throw the covers away from me and get into my uniform. Last day of school. It's friday. I just. I just have to avoid Toya. I think. If he even comes in.

His dad would kill his ass if he didn't, so..

I run my hands through my hair after I brush my teeth, blinking slowly as if I'm taking in the sight of myself.

I hear ringing in my ears, so I leave quickly, going into my bedroom, grabbing my bag as I sling it onto my shoulder.

Sighing, I recite what lessons I have today in my head.

I pause, swallowing as I turn around slowly and look into my mirror.

I glance at my trembling hands, and back up at my reflection.

"No. No. Nu uh." I shake my head and rush out my room, rubbing my forehead. I'm so pathetic, scared of fucking mirrors.

"Morning." Ena groaned. I say it back as I get my things together and leave, putting music on through my headphones.

I get halfway to school and irritably take my headphones off. I hate how every song can be reference to fucking Toya. I actually can't escape him.

I see him and An stood out in the courtyard. She tries to wave but I shake my head and walk into the school. She frowns, confused. I rub my eyes and cuss under my breath when Toya sees me just as I get through the front doors.

"Akito?" I hear him call.

I sigh even though nobody can hear it and walk to the bathrooms. I hear footsteps behind me and realise the dumbass followed me.

"Hey- are you avoiding me?" He frowned.

"Did I do something?" His voice cracked, as I heard the footsteps stop. I carry on, despite my chest feeling like I wanted to rip it out.

"A-Akito?" I hear him quietly say, but he was rooted to the spot at the end of the corridor. I pause.

"I'm sorry. It's you. You're making me ill. I don't have context to give you, but you'll understand." I look at him.

"I- I have tickets to the lantern festival. If you wanted to go, still." He said under his breath, ignoring what I just said.

"God fucking dammit I just can't ever stay away from you." I love you too much.

"Did I do something?" He repeats, murmuring.

"No, it's me. I'm being weird about it." I walk back over to him.

"Are you- sure..?" He blinked, upset in his eyes.

"Please don't be sad, it's not you." I say quietly. Just turn around and leave. Leave.

I don't know what's good and what's bad for me. I sigh and smile, hugging him tightly.

"I wanted to talk about yesterday." He whispered.

"Which part?" I blink.

"Your part." He responded, looking at me as he rested his hand under my chin.

"What even happened?" He frowned. I shrug.

"Oh." Toya blinked, before he wrapped his arms around me, his hand gliding through my hair gently as he sunk his face into my neck. I blushed by subconsious manner, my muscles relaxing in his hold.

I hug him back, nuzzling my face into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry if I did do something." He whispered, and oh my GOD.

His lips are on my neck. I feel them brush my skin as he speaks, his hot breath hitting me.

"U-uh- I- n-no? ha- Haha-" I blink and swallow.

"You okay?" He frowns, doing the same thing again.

"Um. Y-yeah- t-totally? I think.." I stammer, a flustered mess.

He presses his lips up to my skin, before pulling away.

"We have maths first, come on." He smiled. My face is blushed all over, my neck tingling from the soft presence he left me with.

What is wrong with me? I told myself I was avoiding him, now this?

Wait.

Wait, did he just kiss my neck?

No. No, he was just hugging me.

I drop my head and look to the side. I breathe in, looking back up as I sit next to him.

"Hana is already gone, huh?" An muttered. She was already there.

"I liked her." She sighed.

"She was chill." I nod in agreement. I catch Toya looking at me in the corner of my eyes before I sniff and get my maths book out my bag. We sit next to each other at the back seats of the classroom.

"What is this dumb shit?" I sigh, looking at the fractions.

"Like.. I don't care, at all." I roll my eyes.

"Well you should. Come on." Toya sighed, laughing at my whining. He tapped his pen on my book and I looked down.

"I don't wanna." I complained quietly, looking into his eyes.

He smiled at me softly, returning my look at him. He put his hand on my leg.

"Come on, you have to." He rolled his eyes, his thumb brushing over my trousers close to my knee.

An leans around and puts her fingertips on my kneecap, spreading them outward.

I twitch and then groan and slap her forehead. I hate it when she does that shit. It always gets me.

"Kill yourself." I squint.

"No." She stuck her tongue out.

"Yeah." I cross my arms, and she laughs and turns to look at the board again. I scrunch up small peices of paper and throw them at her hair.

"What are you-" She squinted, brushing her hands through her hair. I snicker when she misses them all.

"Dude! What did you do?! What did he do?" She looked at Toya.

"Huh? Nothing." He blinked. I bit my lip and looked down. Toya can keep such a level face.

"He's tricking you by laughing." Toya smiled.

"I hate you!" She flicked my head.

"Stop bickering! It's always you two!!" The teacher shouted at us. I slapped a hand over my mouth to not laugh, An containing it better than me.

I breathe out and stop myself, smiling still.

"You taking Kohane to the festival?" I ask An.

"Yeah, we should go as a four." She smiled. I nod and agree, my tongue licking over my lips quickly to remoisturise them.

"Do you have gum?" I plead An. She rolled her eyes and reluctantly handed me a peice, as I put it in my mouth and chewed on it.

I sighed, bored as I zoned out. Toya snaps me back to reality when I feel his head lean on my shoulder, his hand rested on top of mine before he held it and linked his fingers with mine.

I swallow, before I tilt my own head to place gently on his. I feel him gently caress my hand, his thumb softly moving across my skin.

I swallowed. An looked at me and then Toya and winked, going back to her work.

"Are you okay?" I ask quietly.

"I miss you. I miss you falling asleep on my chest. I miss you hanging around with you almost everyday. What happened?" He asked quietly, his voice just about audible.

I fell in love. That's what happened.

"I'm not really sure." I say evenly, snaking my arm around his back as I rub my hand up his waist.

"Your still in maths class." An spat between gritted teeth.

"Mhm, I know." Toya lifted away from me. I glared at An between narrowed eyes as she mouthed an apology.

After a few minutes class had ended, everyone packing up their things as I stand up with my own bag.

We get dismissed and I go to my next lesson. I feel a hand fasten around my wrist and I look around to see Toya, blinking expectantly.

"What?" I ask.

He tugs me into the bathroom, before wrapping his arms around me as he hugged me tightly.

"The festival is tommorow, saturday." He threaded his hands through my hair, the feeling nice on my scalp.

"Huh? Okay." I hold him back, my chin rested on his shoulder.

"So you'll come?" He asked. I nodded, and he smiled and pulled away. His lips are so perfect, soft and definitely ki-

I stop myself and smile back, nodding as I go to my next lesson.

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2003 words

mhmmm eat it up and cherish it while it's here because this could either be the second to last chapter or the next one will be second to last 😋😋

idrk ion have much to say on this one

an <3