21

CW: Bits of homophobic remarks, mention of death, mention of sexual harassment, and a whole lot of emotions.

(It's time)

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Fiat stands in front of his mirror and straightens out his collared shirt. The buttons suffocate him, so he lets a couple remain undone. He practices his smile and sighs. Just as he starts a mantra in his head, his phone rings and he falls back onto the foot of the bed to answer. "Love?"

"Happy Birthday, love. Are you all dolled up to celebrate the most wonderful day that brought you into this world?" Leo's excessively uplifting voice makes Fiat laugh and his muscles instantly relax. "There we go. I did my job this morning. You stay optimistic okay. You say what you need to say and don't back down. You are strong and beautiful, love. You give me one call and I'll come to you. You need me right here, and I'll be ready with everything you want and need. Okay, love?"

"I love you," Fiat sighs as he leans his elbows against his knees. Leo chuckles and sends back the love. "I don't know what I did in my past life to deserve you."

"Likewise," Leo smiles with his words. "Alright. You drive safe and let me know when you arrive?"

"Of course, love." The couple only stay on the phone for a few more minutes before they hang up so Fiat can get on the road. He responds to the birthday messages from Fern and Chan on his way out and sighs as he takes a groggy call from his best friend while he drives. The tired persona of Ann's makes the drive a lot better and she gives him pep talks while also giving it to him straight as she has little to no filter when she is half asleep and hungover. "I arrived, Pip. I'll probably update you tomorrow or something. Get something to eat and make sure to call P'Chan if you need something."

"You take care of yourself, Fiat. We're all here for you. I know you'll probably call Leo, but if you need me with him and you, just let me know," Ann speaks with a firm tone. Fiat hums in agreement as he shuts of his car. He checks his reflection in the visor mirror and takes a deep breath to build up on confidence. He wrings his hands as he approaches the door. His brows furrow as he hears piano play from inside. His father use to always play it when he was stressed. Fiat raises his hand and the sound of knocking does not even sound like it was his doing.

His body goes ridged when he hears the piano stop for a moment before continuing again more aggressively. Jaw clenched, he hits his fiat against the wood with more force. His breaths become uneven as he gets filled with anxiety. A harsh sound comes from the stringed percussion. A breath gets caught in his throat. The door swings open and the young boy is stunned to his spot. "Phor..."

"You really want to do this?" His father's voice seems tired. Fiat hardens his face with determination as he nods his head. The older man rubs his face. "Give me one reason why I should let you step foot in my house."

"Phor, I want to be part of the family. I want to be accepted by you guys. Please? At least for today and let's talk it out, Phor," Fiat begs.

"I can't find a reason to accept you, Fiat. You haven't given me a reason why I should," his father shakes his head. For a moment, Fiat thinks of giving up, but then hears the voices of Ann and Leo telling him to focus and stand his ground.

"What do you want from me? I have been trying to understand and help you understand why you have so much resentment? I can't change the past. What can I do to be enough for you to accept me?" Fiat begs as tears fall from his red cheeks. He felt pain, anger, and frustration. He is tired.

"I want my sixteen year old son back. The one we could love and accept. Bring the son who was innocent and not a murderer back!"

"How about a son, who wanted the love that his parents have, but could only find it in a man? How about a son who didn't want to get taken advantage and pushed someone he thought was someone special in order to defend himself from being harassed any more than he already was. How about a son who only wants the love of his parents. To be able to hear them call him their beloved son. To be able to fall into their arms after a hard and tiring day. To have meals with and celebrate the success of each other. How about a son who reminds himself everyday that even though his parents aren't supportive of who he loves, they somewhere, deep down, love him." Fiat falls to his knees as he recalls the fear of that tragic day. His body shakes as he hugs himself and looks down, ashamed to meet the eyes of his parents. "Phor, I'm sorry I'm not the son you imagined me to be. I'm sorry that I caused you and Mae so much grief. I'm sorry. I just...I'm tired."

"Baby," Fiat's mother croaks after hearing his wails. He feels the dainty arms surround him and he breaks down completely. Grips onto anything he could to ground him. He chants for his mother like a small child searching for comfort. "I'm so sorry, baby. I didn't know. Oh, I am such a bad mother. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Mae is here now. I'm here."

"Bring him inside." Fiat feels himself being pulled up by his mother and he drags himself to the place he had hoped to step back into for years. The place still smelled the same and he falls onto the couch he use to just lay on after school before getting pushed off to do his homework by his mother. Fiat tries to wipe away his tears and calm himself. He looks around to find small changes like a new ornament to decorate or a change in curtains.

The sound of the piano begins to play and he realizes that his father has left. His eyes trail towards the direction of where the piano would be and his heart feels heavy with the sad tunes. "Have some water, baby."

Fiat gives a small smile and takes the glass in his hands. "Mae, will he be okay?"

"Oh, baby, you know how he is. It's a lot for him to take in. Why did you wait this long to explain?"

"You guys didn't really make it easy. You were already against me preferring guys, so how could I say anything? I was already afraid and scared. People at school already heard about everything before I even got back to school. Can you imagine the looks and the hateful words thrown my way, Mae? I can't blame you, but it hurt to be unable to even have a place that I can feel comforted and accepted. Phor, told me to leave the moment I graduated, so I did. I didn't have t he strength to come clean, but I couldn't let go. I came back every birthday except my own until this year, because I wanted to show you that I still respected you and that I still love you." Fiat puts down the glass and takes his mother's hands as he bares all. "I can't change who I love, Mae. The man I brought on your birthday. He's my first real boyfriend and I really love him. Will you and Phor be able to accept me? Accept us?"

"Does he know?" She asks hesitantly and he nods as tears build in his eyes. She looks down with a small nod and sighs. "Does he treat you well and be the person you need him to be?"

"And more, Mae. His name is Leo and he makes me feel safe and loved. Both him and my friend Ann, Mae. They helped me gain strength and really be myself again. They both know my story and they still accepted me and helped me. You really would love them if you got to meet them," Fiat rambles and he pauses as he sees his own mother fight her own tears as she covers her mouth with her hand. "Mae, I hope you realize that even though I love someone you do not hope or expect for me, I can still have everything I should have in life."

"Have you been living with Leo?" she asks and Fiat immediately shakes his head. "Really? How have you been managing? Are you really still in school?"

"Of course, Mae! I just started my third year. First year I lived in the dorms. The second year I lived with my roommate from before and two others who were our neighbors. Now I live on my own in a small apartment, but it's just me, so I don't mind. I got it on a deal and it's close enough to campus," Fiat already feels so happy to be able to share every little detail that she had missed out on. "I've worked at the library during my free time since my first year. I also got a job as an errand boy at a market during the mornings before classes or on the weekend, depending on the demand. Over the summers, since I have more time I take on more part time jobs to be able to go to school and not be too exhausted during the school year with work as I try to keep my grades high enough to qualify for the scholarships."

"You seem to grow so much in these past few years," She croaks and Fiat squeezes her hand. "You must have had such a hard time by yourself."

"Mm-mm," Fiat shakes his head despite it being a lie. It was definitely hard to do it on his own, but once he got use to it, it was not that bad. "I learned so much from you and Phor. I realized how much work and energy you put in every day. I remind myself everyday to become someone both of you can be proud of. That's why I am in Economics and taking extra classes for business and management. I don't know exactly what I will do with it after, but once I have the knowledge and background, it has got to come easy."

"Is that what you want?" Fiat's brows furrow as he hears his mother's question and feels her brush his fallen hair back. "Isn't what you've been striving for since leaving, to find your happiness and find yourself?"

"Well, yes, but I wanted to better myself to be enough for you guys," Fiat suddenly feels lost. His major may not be his favorite, but he can find enjoyment in it. He would not be able to do well and continue it for this long if he did not. "I don't mind taking this course, Mae. It's practical and more affordable in the long run. If I ever seek for anything in knowledge, I work in the library and can easily pick up a book on the topic. Haven't you and Phor always wished for me to be handsomely dressed in a suit and tie? Being in this field ensures that."

"Oh, baby," his mother coos and pulls him into her embrace. "We only said that because we were never able to get you a nice suit and tie for events. We wished for you to have a good future and for us to finally get you into one. Just once is enough. Now tell me more about that boy and friend of yours. They sound like great people."

"Oh, Mae, they are the best. Ann and I became friends right away during orientation. She is a lot more outgoing than I am, so it was just easy. Ann just always had something that makes you really believe and trust in her. We argue and tease like siblings and look out for each other just the same. She really is the best friend I wanted and needed especially after choosing wrong the last time," Fiat looks down at his hands feeling ashamed to have once called those people friends. "As for Leo, I only grew close to him within this past year and a half, but we play badminton together in club. He is the one I played with for doubles last tournament. We won together. It was the first time I've played doubles since before, so it was so exhilarating. After a while, I tried to deny any interest I had of him, but he confessed and allowed me some time to think and allowing me to make the calls. He pursued me while also giving me the space I need. He knew of what happened and I was scared to fall again. I was scared of being used and taken for a joke, but he continuously reassured me that he was true and honest. You see, Leo is quite popular and well known by everyone in school. He makes it easy to approach him. It's what made me apprehensive, but he's practically perfect Mae. He takes care of me and protects me. He knows I don't like confrontations and he knows I still have some fears, so he lets me take the lead and we stay private about our relationship and have only shared with those I trust. He waits for me to trust someone before telling. He gives so much to me, Mae. I want to be able to give back just as much. Do you think I will be able to?"

"You really do, love him." Fiat's mother's brows furrow and he can tell there are a lot of things running through her mind, but he unhesitatingly nods his head.

"Are these people as great as you say? Would they be able to get here for a late lunch if you asked them to?" Fiat's head whips to find his father standing with his arms crossed. Fiat had not noticed the piano stopped playing. His words get caught in his throat and his mouth moves like a fish. "If they can't because of how short notice it is, then-"

"They'll come! They will most definitely come if I call." Fiat stands and properly faces his father with his hands clasped in front of him. His father huffs with a curt nod as he tells him to make the call. Fiat nods his head quickly and his mother announces that she must go to buy ingredients. Fiat's parents leave and he is oddly left alone at home. His eyes wander, more relaxed and tears form. He remembers to call and he immediately dials for Leo before following up with Ann. It does not take much convincing or explanation before they agreed and prepare themselves.

Fiat wanders further into the house and finds the piano. He glances towards the door as if his parents would suddenly appear before sitting onto the bench. The keys are worn out from use, but the ivory pieces are wiped down and free of dust. Thin fingers glide across before he sighs. His foot gently presses against the pedal before his fingers dance.

"You've become rusty." The music stops and he turns to find his father again, this time with a solemn look on his face. Fiat never imagined to be able to see all of the emotions he has seen today. "You're timing is off."

"I don't remember the last time I've touched a piano," Fiat rises from his seat. His father nods and avoids looking at him who has his eyes trained onto his father. "Do you still play often, Phor?"

"No," his response is short and Fiat nods his head awkwardly.

"Leo and Ann are on their way. Thank you for inviting them-"

"Make yourself useful and bring out the spare table and chairs from the storage. We'll eat in the back." His father turns around, not waiting for his response. Fiat closes the piano to avoid ruining the keys and follows behind his father. The two set up the outside for guests, as they would have in the past and the grill gets rolled out. Fiat takes initiative to clean it and even helps set up the skewers for the barbecue.

For the first time in a long one, Fiat feels part of the family. While little to no words are exchanged, the three of them prepare for the guests and the celebration. Fiat takes note of his childhood favorites being prepared by his mother and he has to fight his smile.

Just over an hour after inviting, there is a knock on their door. Fiat's father sits down at the head of the table and crosses his arms while his mother offers a smile and gestures for him to get the door. Fiat excuses himself and rushes to the door. He swings it open and finally feels his chest expand, relieving the tension that has lingered since arriving.

"You alright?" Leo examines his face and smiles when he sees that he is fine. Fiat steps away to let them in and hugs them both.

"We got your parents some gifts. Last minute, but we hope they like it," Ann says raising the gift bags in their hands.

"Thank you," Fiat is grateful for their thoughtfulness. "You guys are the best. Thank you for driving all the way on such short notice."

"Hey, we promised that we will be here for you. You honestly saved me from boredom. I was about to get dragged with my own parents to a business convention. Like I know I'll have to do that eventually, but right now, no thank you," Ann shakes her head and the other two laugh at her animated behavior. A clearing of the throat makes them remember where they were. Fiat's mother stands by the doorway to the back and glances between the two guests. Ann approaches first with Leo in tow. "Khun Mae! You are so beautiful. I picked out this beautiful bouquet, but it does not compare!"

"Oh! Ann was it? You are such a good talker. You must have a bunch men lining up!"

"I don't, but I do have a boyfriend. I was lucky to find him," Ann wraps her arm around Fiat's mother's who has yet to drop the smile that is on her face.

"Hello, Khun Mae. Ann is right, absolutely beautiful. I hope you like traditional teas. These have nutritional benefits," Leo greets her and Fiat smiles as he sees her accept his greeting and gift.

"My husband is waiting. Let's continue this outside. Fiat, grab me a vase with water for these gorgeous bouquet." Fiat nods and only leaves after Leo and Ann give him reassuring looks to his apprehensive one. Fiat watches the two walk out with smiles and blows out air to exhale as he searches the cabinets for the ceramic vase his mother loves. He fills it with water and the house mixture to provide nutrients for the flowers before organizing them into the vase. Fiat sets the vase onto the decorative table by the window and smiles.

As he steps out he glances around to read the room. "Mae, I placed the flowers on the table by the window."

"Perfect. Now let's start eating. The drive must have been long," Fiat's mother smiles and Fiat goes towards the grill and rolls up his sleeves to prepare to cook the skewers.

"I'll do it. Just sit and tend to your friends," his father lays a hand onto his shoulder and Fiat tries to hide his surprise as he nods and moves back towards the table and sits between his mother and Leo. His mother smiles at him and he could not help but glancing back at his father's back.

"So, I hear you play badminton with Fiat?" Fiat's mother asks Leo. He smiles and nods.

"I could not compare to his skill, but I've learned a lot by playing with him. Fiat's looked up by a lot of our members and our coach lets him do whatever he wants-"

"Not true. Mae, our coach treats us all the same. Leo is just exaggerating," Fiat interjects.

"Modest as always. If we ever play one-on-one, I could never match him," Leo shakes his head. "You've raised a wonderful son, Khun Mae, Khun Phor. I can assure you that everyone who meets him absolutely loves him."

"Shush," Fiat nudges Leo below the table as he feels his neck and ears heat up.

"He was a little quiet when I first met him, but he is really fun to be with afterwards. I'm a scatterbrain who usually acts on impulse. Fiat helps me say grounded and brings me back to reality," Ann adds and Fiat can only curl into himself as his friends talk about him to his parents. He glances over at his mom to see her smiling and his eyes widen a bit at the sight of the glistening eyes behind her lashes. He looked over at his father and wonders if he is listening as he keeps his back to them. "Khun Mae, you do not understand, I would be a mess without him. He is such a hard worker. In school and in life."

"We balance each other out, Pip. I'd be stuck in my room if it was not for her. I'd honestly forget the outside world," Fiat chuckles as he leans forward and picks at his plate.

"Pip?" his mother questions. He chuckles and the best friends explain their nicknames. His mother laughs with them. "How come your boyfriend didn't come along? Fiat didn't tell us about him. He only mentioned the two of you. Would your boyfriend be okay with you meeting another man's parents?"

"Oh, P'Chan? We just became official recently. He understands my friendship with Fiat. He only encourages me to check on or meet up with Fiat when I talk about him or ask. Fiat is my number one person outside of family, just as I am his."

Fiat just nods as his mother looks over at him. She questions Leo on how he feels about it and Leo proudly grins. "I'm more than happy that Fiat has someone to lean on and trust. They were friends far before I even really got to know him. We wouldn't have had the opportunities to do so with out her."

Fiat's eyes go wide as he realizes how weird their story is. His father turns around with a mountain of skewers and other barbecue dishes and sits. "Because of her? What does your relationship have to do with her?"

The three exchange nervous glances. How or what do they tell his parents? No one really knows how his parents would react. From the previous encounters that Fiat has had and the stories he shares, how can they tell the odd love story confidently and not worry about triggering something that can potentially ruin the day. Ann and Leo look towards Fiat to lead. He scratches the side of his head and prepares himself for an interesting reveal.

*******

ʕ•ᴥ•ʔฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

thoughts??

An abrupt ending because this reached 3.9k words.

How are we feeling? What do you think about what happened? What do you think is really running through Fiat's parents' minds? They finally let him into the home. His father left while his mother stayed to listen for more.

I didn't dive into the details after Fiat clarified that he was the victim because sometimes explanations need time. Fiat's parents already received a great shock of learning that it was based on self defense. It would not make sense for them to suddenly dive deep into the topic especially based on how their personalities are. Fiat's mother may be more of one that would listen for the details sooner, but I want them all to be at a better place with each other before really sitting down and talking with each other.

This is just the start of how things are with the family. I hope it's okay that I've split this rather than getting it done in one go.

Much love to all of you. I hope you are safe and healthy always.

xxdctuan

Extra Note! (added days after this was finished being written)

Taking a short break, next update may be more than a week~

Sorry for the cliffhanger, but hopefully the chapter is worth the wait♡︎